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Here's to Your Health:  My Natural Childbirth Experience  |
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MustangSuzie
True Blue Farmgirl
634 Posts
Sarah
New London
Missouri
USA
634 Posts |
 Posted - Mar 23 2007 : 3:34:16 PM
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I was going to stay out of this one as i think it has gotten extremely out of hand, but I cannot. I also think that it is rude and unfair to attack Tasha for choosing not to have some else provide her prenatal care. She is not a drug user that doesn't care about the welfare of her unborn child, nor is she a teenager trying to hide her condition from the world, she is very knowlegable in this area and provided her own excellent prenatal care. You can learn alot just by paying close attention to your own body.
I also think it is wonderful that Tasha is studying to become a midwife.  There is great wisdom in that age old practice, one that has been shoved by the wayside by modern medicine. I know women here in Missouri that have had homebirths virtually by themselves because midwifery is illegal here. There is your injustice, the law.
The going thing in hospitals is to force anyone who has had a c section in the past to repeat that, no vbac allowed, all for legal issues. Malpractice insurance is so high the doc's don't want to risk being sued. I had a section with my first, and 3 vbacs. I would have a homebirth in a heartbeat rather than be forced into surgery.
Also, I work in a hospital, and just this past winter in our ob unit we had nurses working in the newborn nursery and the same ones taking care of babies with RSV. All because they didn't have enough staff. Staph infections are rampant in hosptials and becoming very drug resistant. One place I worked thoroughly cleaned a room after a MRSA/VRE patient and cultured it seven days later to find that the staph was still present. How many times have you seen your doc clean his stethoscope before placing on your newborn?
Everyone is entitled to her own opionion and birthing options. Let's all be well informed in our decisions and take the best care of our bodies that we can, all the time, and not just during pregnancy.
Blessings....
Sarah
"In our every deliberation, we must consider the impact of our decisions on the next seven generations." -From The Great Law Of The Iroquois Confederacy.
REDUCE, REUSE, RECYCLE!!!!
http://mustangsuzie.wordpress.com
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Edited by - MustangSuzie on Mar 23 2007 3:36:25 PM |
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lilpunkin
True Blue Farmgirl
368 Posts
Texas
USA
368 Posts |
Posted - Mar 23 2007 : 4:04:21 PM
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Well Tasha, to respond to your post about the rupture, I must be pretty rare. I have a normal horizontal small cut. But rupturing is what I was facing with the birth of my second child.
Tasha, its not a matter of what you believe that is bad, it is how you are presenting it. I am glad that you are as strong in your opinion to home birth as you are. But where it crosses the line is when you make other mothers feel as though they are losers for not giving birth at home. Some have no choice, and I so happened to be one of them. I was and still am very healthy. I did not have high risk pregnancies at all. I had great pregnancies! But it all came down to delivery.
I dont find your "Im selfish" post very flattering. The key words there are "Im Selfish". In my opinion being a parent isnt about being selfish. Birthing at home is for your comfort, not the babies. Because I know for me, whether giving birth in a hospital or at home, my child would be given the same love and attention either way. I was not fearful of my pregnancies or birthings. I had wonderful doctors and nurses that took very good care of me and my baby. I don't think anyone here has made their pregnancies seem as though they were diseases, that was never implied, except only by you.
What I dont understand Tasha, is that you dont trust doctors enough to deliver your babies, but yet when they are sick you take them to one.
Tasha, if you are wanting to win women over in their birthing choices that is great. But maybe you should change your method. For me personally I find your presentation offensive. It also makes me wonder, if you were to assist in a birth, are you so against hospitals that if a women in your care were to need one, that you wouldnt because of your beliefs or stand? I would be concerned for the welfare of those in your care.
You are not any better of a mother than me or anyone else here because of the way you gave birth. That is the way that you are coming across and I think people are just trying to help you realize that.
Life isn't measured by how many breaths you take, but by how many moments take your breath away. |
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GaiasRose
True Blue Farmgirl
2552 Posts
Tasha-Rose
St. Paul
Minnesota
2552 Posts |
Posted - Mar 23 2007 : 4:16:54 PM
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I want to clarifyu that over and again I have said that in no way do I feel I am a better mom than anyone.
I don't take my kids to the Dr. Zoe has gone twice and for things that we COULD NOT take care of, (one was an ER visit at 1130 at night) early onset asthma and severe excema. TWICE. When my kids are sick, they get echinacea, chicken soup and rest, not drs and antibiotics. dont assume I go to the dr for illness when I don't. I have no idea how you made that assumption.
I dont believe I presented anything in anyway but a truthful way. Truth upsets and truth makes us uncomfortable, but it is truth nonethelss.I know for sure that my intent was not harsh whatsoever. AND AGAIN, When did I say that there is absoultely no exception, homebirth is the way to go...I think everyone is compoletely missing that. I have said a number of times that there are emergency situations that happen, that need medical attention, but the instance is far less than emergency instance right within a hospital setting....why dioes everyone keep missing this. This has got to be the fourth time I have said it. If a woman *NEEDS* medical intervention then it is needed. I have said it before in a number of posts. If anyone would btoher reading the facts I have presented. That is where my frustration is....you all ask, "why do you hold to this?" and I present not just experience but also facts and they are blatantly ignored.
No, giving birth at home is not jsut baout my comfort, either. It is about not being cut. it is about not having an IFM stuck into my child's head, or drugs administered despite my objections, shots and drops in baby's eyes, etc. It is not just baout my comfort, but also that of my child's. A stranger is not the first person that my babies need to be met by...either me or my husband are going to be thier greeters. Read the statements again...they are not about me alone. they are about my family as well.
~*~Brightest Blessings~*~
Tasha-Rose
Blogs: http://gaiarose.wordpress.com
http://tasharose365.wordpress.com/
Homepage:
http://gaiasrose.etsy.com
http://ForestFaeries.etsy.com
Birth is safe, interference is risky; TRUST BIRTH |
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GaiasRose
True Blue Farmgirl
2552 Posts
Tasha-Rose
St. Paul
Minnesota
2552 Posts |
Posted - Mar 23 2007 : 4:18:36 PM
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And further, if someone feels like a loser for the way their births have gone, I cannot be responsible for the feelings of others when all I have done is present information and experience on the topic. I asdamantly REFUSE to accept responsibility for the way someone else took information and perceived what I said. How a person reacts to a situation or whathaveyou is entirely up to them, not others.
Sometimes (yep gonna say this) sometimes it takes feeling like crap about something that necessitates change. We have all been there in many a circumstance.
~*~Brightest Blessings~*~
Tasha-Rose
Blogs: http://gaiarose.wordpress.com
http://tasharose365.wordpress.com/
Homepage:
http://gaiasrose.etsy.com
http://ForestFaeries.etsy.com
Birth is safe, interference is risky; TRUST BIRTH |
Edited by - GaiasRose on Mar 23 2007 4:23:05 PM |
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primjillie
True Blue Farmgirl
138 Posts
Jill
Antelope
CA
USA
138 Posts |
Posted - Mar 23 2007 : 4:21:08 PM
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| I wish Tasha would see what we are saying. No one is saying homebirth is bad, just not the choice for everyone. Tasha, you came on at the beginning angry and defensive and for what reason? You threw stats at everyone when it was just a friendly discusion about each person's experience - no one needed or asked for stats. We were just discussing different births. You say you have gotten over your bad experience, but I think it has scarred you badly and you are very defensive about it. You also are rude stating you didn't believe most of the people who said they needed intervention. How do you know? Were you there? You are making them feel bad and less of a mother and that is not fair. You may not want medical care, but please don't demean people who trust their doctors and want the best for their babies in their own way. I have to tell you, I am glad there are doctors and I'm grateful for the improvements made in maternal and infant care that allows many babies born today to live and thrive, where years ago they would die. I think everyone needs to look at both sides and honor each other. (and please, no more stats - this is just a simple discussion of birth experience!) |
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GaiasRose
True Blue Farmgirl
2552 Posts
Tasha-Rose
St. Paul
Minnesota
2552 Posts |
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Libbie
Farmgirl Connection Cultivator
3579 Posts
Anne E.
Elsinore
Utah
USA
3579 Posts |
Posted - Mar 23 2007 : 4:26:11 PM
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Okay, farmgirls. The forum is a place to provide information and to share ideas - to support each other and to perhaps offer other choices that we all might not be aware of. What it is NOT is a place to criticize other farmgirls life choices.
Be kind. There is no one right way.
XOXO, Libbie
"All through the long winter, I dream of my garden. On the first day of spring, I dig my fingers deep into the soft earth. I can feel its energy, and my spirits soar..." - Helen Hayes |
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Lizabeth
True Blue Farmgirl
560 Posts
Washington
560 Posts |
Posted - Mar 23 2007 : 4:29:58 PM
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Tasha, is there a place in the western states like the farm in Tennessee I think it is that put together "spiritual midwifery"? I tried to find a place that had a community of women to support me with encouragement, expertise, and the humility to seek medical care if truly necessary. I loved reading that book, and if 3000 miles could be driven while pregnant and with intense sciatic pain I would have done it! so is there somewhere out here?
http://www.handcraftsbyheather.com |
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GaiasRose
True Blue Farmgirl
2552 Posts
Tasha-Rose
St. Paul
Minnesota
2552 Posts |
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GaiasRose
True Blue Farmgirl
2552 Posts
Tasha-Rose
St. Paul
Minnesota
2552 Posts |
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lilpunkin
True Blue Farmgirl
368 Posts
Texas
USA
368 Posts |
Posted - Mar 23 2007 : 4:44:05 PM
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Tasha I didnt come up with assumptions about your kids going to the doctor whether onece or twice in their lives, you said it in your post.
Also, I personally dont feel like a loser for how I gave birth to my wonderful children. I am very blessed. But your presentation was as if those who hadnt given home birth were. And your statement, "sometimes It takes feeling like crap about something to necessitate change," I dont feel like crap and didnt feel like crap about my births. And what you have said does not make me feel like crap, but I think it is offensive in your presentation. I am not trying to argue with you in the least. I just think one needs to remember there are all kinds of circumstances that not everyone can help. And I know you are understanding of that.
Life isn't measured by how many breaths you take, but by how many moments take your breath away. |
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GaiasRose
True Blue Farmgirl
2552 Posts
Tasha-Rose
St. Paul
Minnesota
2552 Posts |
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Lizabeth
True Blue Farmgirl
560 Posts
Washington
560 Posts |
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Persephone
True Blue Farmgirl
172 Posts
Katrina
Indiana
USA
172 Posts |
Posted - Mar 23 2007 : 6:20:30 PM
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This thread has been troubling me, and I think I finally figured out why. I'm hearing (through the negativity) a lot of misinformation about the safety of homebirth, and also a lot of myths.
First, before I dispel a few myths, I'd like to say that YES. You can birth in a hospital, and it can be a wonderful experience. And YES, there are very valid reasons for birthing in a hospital. Considering the circumstances surrounding my own birth, I felt safer birthing in a hospital, and I do not regret my choice. I feel I made the best decision for mine and my baby's health with the information I had at the time. That doesn't mean that parts of my birth didn't trouble me. That's only because I DID plan a homebirth, for the reasons Tasha has mentioned about decreased risk of csection, etc. And also because I know from personal experience what a birth CAN be like, when it's at home. It can be beautiful, and wonderful, and it's not a dangerous option. I find it so frustrating when people say things like, "I couldn't live with myself if my baby died at home!" Well- babies die in hospitals too. They die because of mistakes doctors make. And they die because - well, sometimes babies die. And as the stats have proven, they die MORE often in hospitals.
Babies do NOT die because cords were around their neck.
Babies do NOT die because they swallow meconium.
9lb babies DO descend birth canals- as a matter of fact, TWELVE lb babies descend birth canals- saying that a 9lb baby couldn't is displaying ignorance of how a pelvis works. Cephalopelvic disproportion is VIRTUALLY a myth.
As for prenatal care, what does the doctor do? Screens for abnormalities, checks your cervix, weight, blood pressure, measures your fundus- if you choose to not get screened (as I do, since I would birth an abnormal baby regardless), then what does that leave? Things you can do yourself, with a little knowledge. The most important thing during pregnancy is good nutrition, and OBs rarely counsel about that. Or it's minimal if they do.
There are very few things that you can't transfer to a hospital over. For the majority of problems in birth, they can either be taken care of at home by a knowledgeable mother or midwife, or there is enough advance warning to transfer.
I would love to hear some more birth fears. I would love to be able to dispel some more myths surrounding the mystery of birth. I am a doula, so this is my passion as well. BUT as a doula, we are working for the MOTHER- to give her the kind of birth SHE wants- if that means in a hospital, flat on her back with an epi, ok. But we also educate, so women can make TRULY informed decisions, based on knowledge, not fear.
For stats about the safety of homebirth, I would read Ina May's Guide to Childbirth- she has stats in the back of the book of her practice on the Farm, and her stats are comparable to homebirth stats. And Henci Goer has a book called "The Thinking Woman's Guide to a Better Birth", which has scientific evidence to back up all of the things she says in the book. Also, Klaus,Kennel and Klaus have done work on the bonding of mothers and babies that is INVALUABLE to any woman looking to give birth again. I'd google their names.
The Farm study:
http://www.thefarm.org/charities/mid.html |
Edited by - Persephone on Mar 23 2007 6:30:33 PM |
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Lizabeth
True Blue Farmgirl
560 Posts
Washington
560 Posts |
Posted - Mar 23 2007 : 8:08:27 PM
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I looked at the community you mentioned, Tasha, and they aren't what I'm looking for. Thanks though.
Does anyone else know of a midwifery community, like the Gaskin's, but in the west?
I certainly agree that conventional ob care does not include sufficient information about nutrition. I was quite frustrated that I was helped more with this.
http://www.handcraftsbyheather.com |
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Lizabeth
True Blue Farmgirl
560 Posts
Washington
560 Posts |
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Persephone
True Blue Farmgirl
172 Posts
Katrina
Indiana
USA
172 Posts |
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GaiasRose
True Blue Farmgirl
2552 Posts
Tasha-Rose
St. Paul
Minnesota
2552 Posts |
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_Rebecca_
True Blue Farmgirl
568 Posts
Rebecca
OK
USA
568 Posts |
Posted - Mar 24 2007 : 07:59:11 AM
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My experience was in this order: 1) hospital/ob/gyn birth 2) midwifery/midwife birth, 3)hosp/midwife, 4) hosp/midwife.
I LOVED the midwifery so much, but they closed it down. Insurance was too costly. I would love to see more and more midwiferies around the United States. I don't think I would have wanted to have a baby at home, the midwifery was so awesome. I delivered on a queen-size bed. I felt so at home and so comfortable. It was only 4 miles from my actual home. It was very nice. I delivered at about 9am and went home at about 2pm that afternoon and had a home health nurse come to check on me, but they TAUGHT me how to check my baby so that I could do that part myself. They also taught my husband how to check on me and smoosh me so that my uterus would go back. I think that it is good to know that you can do things on your own.
On the 9lbs babies or larger topic: my first baby was 8lbs 6oz and he was the hardest to get through, I think my tailbone was fractured. After that, my 9lb and then 9lbs 2 oz girls came through just fine! And the only dilemma with my 10lb 7oz baby was that he was turned a little bit. But the birth team came in and shoved him over by pushing on me. It hurt, but it was just fine. Out he came.
Maybe I just have big hips, but I didn't have trouble.
I am not understanding why 9lbs is considered high risk? The midwifery certainly didn't think so and they had to be careful because of their insurance. They had delivered a 13lb baby there, no problems. They didn't mind. If that is the case you need to talk to your practicioner and make sure they have been exposed to births of large babies so they don't get so freaked out about bigger babies. It's not that big of a deal.
.·:*¨¨* :·.Rebecca.·:*¨¨* :·. |
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vintagechica
True Blue Farmgirl
438 Posts
Eren
Poolville
TX
USA
438 Posts |
Posted - Mar 24 2007 : 08:07:40 AM
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I am very petite at 5 feet 1 in. tall and delivered my last at 9 lbs. 1 oz. just fine. (small tear) but it was his shoulder not his enormous head, lol! I must have birthing hips as well (but dont we all).
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
A sure way to avoid housework...live outdoors.
Visit me anytime at my blog:
www.vintagechica.typepad.com |
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lilpunkin
True Blue Farmgirl
368 Posts
Texas
USA
368 Posts |
Posted - Mar 24 2007 : 08:41:58 AM
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My 9 pound baby had a big ole melon on him. His melon was to big to fit. We tried everything to make it happen, but it just wasnt working. I know big babies can be born just fine. My grandfather was 14 pounds 11 ounces and was born just fine. I guess it just depends on the womens body.
Life isn't measured by how many breaths you take, but by how many moments take your breath away. |
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primjillie
True Blue Farmgirl
138 Posts
Jill
Antelope
CA
USA
138 Posts |
Posted - Mar 24 2007 : 10:11:43 AM
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| I had a 9 lb 1 oz boy first, then a 9 lb 5 oz boy(with a big head!), and had to push for hours with both. After that I had a 8 lb girl and she said slid right out! Have the big ones first to pave the way! |
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MustangSuzie
True Blue Farmgirl
634 Posts
Sarah
New London
Missouri
USA
634 Posts |
Posted - Mar 24 2007 : 2:16:46 PM
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My biggest one was 9 5oz and that was a week and a half early. He was also the easiest delivery I had. My thanks to my body that I was so sweaty the epidural came out and I could actually feel what was going on. Made things go so much quicker.
Blessings....
Sarah
"In our every deliberation, we must consider the impact of our decisions on the next seven generations." -From The Great Law Of The Iroquois Confederacy.
REDUCE, REUSE, RECYCLE!!!!
http://mustangsuzie.wordpress.com
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FarmGirl~K
True Blue Farmgirl
512 Posts
Kelly
TX
USA
512 Posts |
Posted - Mar 24 2007 : 5:28:36 PM
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I have had 3 children. All 3 in the hospital. While there are things I would have liked differently on each one, I had good experiences with each one.
My 1st was born by c-section after 26 hours of back labor. So much more painful for me than my other children's labors. I stayed at 7cm for several of those last hours & my son's heart rate started to go down with each contraction. We both were tired. Even if I had fully dilated, I couldnt have delivered him. I had read so many books and never read about the c-section because I never thought I would have to have one. I wish I had been more prepared for that.
My 2nd was delivered vaginally 15 months after my 1st. This was so much easier for me. My labor was only 8 hours this time. I did have pain medication which allowed me to sleep for part of it. My dd was born at @4am. I had severe pain where my c-section scar was, once that pain started, it seemed the meds wore off & I could feel everything. Once my water was broken, it relieved the pressure & my labor sped up quickly. I had an episiotomy, & then she popped right out. My recovery with that birth was so much quicker.
With my youngest, I was induced. From labor to birth it was about 5 hours. Also a vaginal birth. I asked for the same meds from my 2nd delivery. I didnt have an episiotomy this time & did have a small tear. I nursed her immediately after the nurses did their APGAR test. This one was more relaxed for me because I was older & had experienced the others.
I think a woman needs to make the decision that suits her, her body, & her family the best. While I had meds, it made me more comfortable which made things less stressful for me. Your experience may have you change things the next time around or choose to go the same route. Each birth is different, no matter where you have your baby, the most important thing to come out of it all is a healthy baby and mother.
Thanks for sharing your experiences. |
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momtoeight
Farmgirl in Training
35 Posts
Laura
Medicine Bow
WY
USA
35 Posts |
Posted - Apr 11 2007 : 10:06:19 PM
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I have a sister who is absolutely convinced that nobody should give birth in a hospital. She is persuaded that had I just got the right midwife, I'd sail right through with no pitocin, no problems, and a pleasant experience. I've given birth to 8 children, and I'd never EVER give birth at home, because I know in the depths of my soul, that to do so would result in my death, and perhaps the child's also.
I don't produce the hormones necessary for labor and delivery. No, it is not that my body just has a different timetable. I don't produce sufficient oxytocin to push a baby out of my body. I know, I've tried in more ways than anyone knows. I don't ever go into labor. My body has been given more than normal stimulation for labor, and has never done it without pitocin. During the birth of my fifth child, I was dilated to 10, and they turned the pitocin off so the doctor could get there in time. My labor stopped cold. The doctor entered the room, they turned the pitocin back on, and she was born right after.
When I had my third child, the cartilage in my pelvis tore loose. This is excruciatingly painful. He was large, and posterior. I gave birth to him in spite of the pain. The rest of the births were all just as painful, up until my last.
Our Sidney was born with a 16" head, and she was posterior. My doctor worked with me, helping to ease her into the world. I feel that angels must have been literally holding my body together. There is no logical reason why she should have been born without severe damage to me. The birth was very very difficult, and I was in no condition to see her right after birth - they tell me she looked at me before the blood supply from me stopped.
You see, she had Thanatophoric Dysplasia - her ribs did not grow past about the 5th month, and her lungs were simply too small to sustain life. She could not swallow, and starting at about 5 months, I started building up too much amniotic fluid. By the time I delivered, at 39 weeks (I carried longer than my doctor recommended, because I felt it was in the best interest of my baby), I looked like I was carrying quadruplets. I could barely walk. After breaking my water, the nurse on duty estimated I lost in excess of 2 GALLONS of fluid. She was not exaggerating, I saw the filled buckets. Normally, such a huge amount of stretching would put a woman into labor. Not me.
My daughter died in my arms 18 minutes after her birth, and 5 minutes after she took her last breath. She died in part because the doctors in hospitals that could have helped her, refused to help her. In spite of that, we gave birth in a small local hospital, where every person in the room was there because they cared. It was, oddly, one of the better birth experiences I've had, because of the caring for our daughter and myself in terrible circumstances.
If I had lived 100 years ago, I would have died in birth with my first son. Not only do I not produce enough oxytocin to birth a baby, I also do not produce the hormones to shrink my uterus down after birth. I hemorrhaged in spite of massage and nursing. I've done so after every birth in which the doctor expected my body to "be normal". I have not done so when the doctors were pro-active and took measures to prevent hemorrhage after the birth.
I have no great opinion of modern obstetrical care. I never fail to offend my doctors - I refuse to take prenatal vitamins (they make me sick), and I control my own blood sugar by my own diet (which they always question even though they can offer nothing better). And I have learned to state unequivocally that I will NOT take a Glucose Tolerance Test, nor will I allow a doctor to do just anything during labor.
I've done this 8 times though. I've tried various natural induction methods, and they do not do more than produce weak Braxton Hicks contractions. I've had my water broke, I've had Prostin Gel, I've done all the home encouragements. My body is not "normal", and a home birth would be deadly.
I'd have another baby in a heartbeat if my body would cooperate. Instead I miscarry regularly - and it doesn't behave then either.
And for anyone who still feels that I should just find the right midwife, I've tried. They will not touch me. I am simply too high risk. I have no real choices anymore about who I see for OB care - all but the high risk specialists turn me down flat.
I love that some women can have babies at home. Two of my sisters did, and it was the right choice for them. But it would not ever be the right choice for me, or for many other women with a range of problems. Birth is simply an individual thing, and no one can ever judge what is right for someone else.
Babies are the important thing. I have been incredibly blessed with seven healthy babies, and one miracle of a different kind.
Laura
Mom to Eight
Firelight Web Studio - http://www.firelightwebstudio.com - Small Business Website Services with a Difference - Personal, Flexible, and Friendly |
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Here's to Your Health: My Natural Childbirth Experience |
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My Natural Childbirth Experience
