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Family Matters:  Wanted-Christian Fellowship  |
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maggie14
True Blue Farmgirl
6784 Posts
Hannah
Washington
USA
6784 Posts |
 Posted - Apr 05 2010 : 11:51:23 AM
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That sounds wonderful Rae! Thanks so much for doing this! I am soo sorry for you FIL!! Prayers sent! Please keep us updated!
Hugs,
Channah
Farmgirl sister #1219
Friendship is not something that can be bought, it is earned. |
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maggie14
True Blue Farmgirl
6784 Posts
Hannah
Washington
USA
6784 Posts |
Posted - Apr 05 2010 : 11:54:45 AM
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That sounds wonderful Rae! Thanks so much for doing this! I am soo sorry for you FIL!! Prayers sent! Please keep us updated!
Hugs,
Channah
Farmgirl sister #1219
Friendship is not something that can be bought, it is earned. |
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knittinchick
True Blue Farmgirl
1854 Posts
Megan
Wisconsin
1854 Posts |
Posted - Apr 05 2010 : 12:12:01 PM
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Rae, I'm sorry about your FIL! Prayers sent!
I started a new thread with all the readings in it if you guys want to check it out and start reading.
God's Blessings,
Megan aka Loretta Rae
At heart, I am both a sassy city girl and a down-home country gal. |
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Old Spirit
True Blue Farmgirl
1498 Posts
Rae
MN
1498 Posts |
Posted - Apr 05 2010 : 2:03:54 PM
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I put on a note on the new thread so people know they are all welcome to join.
Thank you for your prayers, I appreciate them very much and will keep you updated along the way.
Rae
Farm Girl #647
...those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles:...
Isaiah 40:31
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Old Spirit
True Blue Farmgirl
1498 Posts
Rae
MN
1498 Posts |
Posted - Apr 05 2010 : 11:23:24 PM
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Here I am again, my SIL boyfriend committed suicide last night. Please prayers for her.
Hubby just called back to hospital for FIL, will try sleep an hour or so, get myself ready for work and head off to hospital. So glad I have you prayer warriors right now!!!
Thank you
Rae
Farm Girl #647
...those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles:...
Isaiah 40:31
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Julia
True Blue Farmgirl
1949 Posts
Julia
Shelton
WA
USA
1949 Posts |
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classygram
True Blue Farmgirl
1812 Posts
Brenda
Pleasant Hill
Mo.
USA
1812 Posts |
Posted - Apr 06 2010 : 05:20:38 AM
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Oh Rae, Your family is all in my prayers. I do wish I was there to help you out. Keep up your strength girlfriend! We are all here for you.
LOVE and big HUGS~~~Brenda
"What lies behind us, and what lies before us are small matter compared to what lies within us."
Ralph Waldo Emerson |
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knittinchick
True Blue Farmgirl
1854 Posts
Megan
Wisconsin
1854 Posts |
Posted - Apr 06 2010 : 09:01:33 AM
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Oh, Rae, I'm so sorry! What trials your family is going through right now. But keep hope in the Lord; He'll take care of you! Sending prayers!
God's Blessings,
Megan aka Loretta Rae
At heart, I am both a sassy city girl and a down-home country gal. |
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mom101
Farmgirl at Heart
1 Posts
cindy
kingsley
pa
USA
1 Posts |
Posted - Apr 06 2010 : 09:21:17 AM
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Hi,
I'm new to this, but I'm also looking for new friends to talk to about christian living. I exchange different book with some other women in my church. I like Bev Lewis series. Hope to chat some more later. I also homeschool my two teenage sons. |
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prayin granny
True Blue Farmgirl
1874 Posts
Linda
Kansas
1874 Posts |
Posted - Apr 06 2010 : 09:24:07 AM
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Ladies, is it too late to join in with your bible study? Are you doing women of the bible first? Let me know. Thanks, Linda
Country at Heart |
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maggie14
True Blue Farmgirl
6784 Posts
Hannah
Washington
USA
6784 Posts |
Posted - Apr 06 2010 : 10:38:02 AM
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Welcome Cindy!! You found the right places!! So glad you jumped right in!!!
Rae, praying for you family!!!
Linda, You sure can join!! We are reading women of the bible first but won't talk about it till the 20th. Thats when Megan gets back from Washington D.C.
Hugs,
Channah
Farmgirl sister #1219
Friendship is not something that can be bought, it is earned. |
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maggie14
True Blue Farmgirl
6784 Posts
Hannah
Washington
USA
6784 Posts |
Posted - Apr 06 2010 : 10:47:41 AM
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P.S. If you ladies have anyother question Rae( Old Spirit) is leading the study group so ask her. And Megan posted the things we will study on another topic under Family Matters. :)
Hugs,
Channah
Farmgirl sister #1219
Friendship is not something that can be bought, it is earned. |
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natesgirl
True Blue Farmgirl
1735 Posts
angela
martinsville
indiana
USA
1735 Posts |
Posted - Apr 07 2010 : 03:01:03 AM
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I wanted to say thank you for the replies to my post. It does help to know there are others who have struggled and there is someone to care enough to respond to you. I am fighting a real anger and jealousy problem and I think I am blaming God for being in this situation. I don't know how to forgive and let go. I know I am holding myself back from my own future happiness and I sometimes feel as if I am turning bitter about it. I feel as if I'm in quicksand up to my chest and I'm afraid it's affecting my health as well as my life. I used to do Bible studies every day and I was even making up my own studies on individual words and the Biblical meanings. It was so fulfilling and made me feel great. Now I haven't opened my Bible in nearly a year and it hurts me to even think of it. I feel so angry and I can't seem to get a grip on it. I know it wasn't Gods fault that I wound up where I am. Every fiber of my being told me it was a mistake to move in the direction I did. I knew it would make me miserable but I did it for other people in my life. I wanted them to be happy and I foolishly thought I could make it work. I can't go back and I don't know how to fix it here. I waste most of my day wishing for my old life back and it only makes things worse. I've toyed with the idea of a word study on forgiveness, but I honestly don't think I have the strenghth for that. I've also thought about a word study on anger, maybe it would help me to understand where I'm at better. Is there a study on running ahead of God or doing your own thing in spite of Him? I don't want to chew up too much space on this because the whole story would be a book. Is there anyone out there who understands a little of where I'm coming from and could offer any suggestions on getting myself and my life back under control?
God - Gardening - Family - Is anything else important? |
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classygram
True Blue Farmgirl
1812 Posts
Brenda
Pleasant Hill
Mo.
USA
1812 Posts |
Posted - Apr 07 2010 : 04:59:51 AM
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Angela I believe alot of people have been where you are right now. And you can fill up as much space as you need. That is one thing I believe, is to get all those feelings out and then you will know what to work at. I'm going to hit a little on my situation as a example of what you may be going through. I was married for 25 years and thought I would always be married to the same man into our senior years. But that did not happen. He thought he'd be happier with my best friend of 20 years. I don't know if I was in shock or just down right angry!!! But I thought well it's pay back time. After finding them together I moved out and starting living with my now DH. Number one mistake was that I moved out. In divorce I got nothing. #2 mistake I should have tried to make it on my own. #3 mistake I couldn't live with my guilt of living with a man unmarried. I lost my kids for a year because they thought I was the cause of the divorce. Not thinking about the fact that BF moved into my house. I never talked against their father. I felt that they would soon find out the truth. But I was dieing inside without them. I had no where to go to help me. So I turned back to God and gave it all to him. I truely asked for forgiveness and guidence to how to move on. It was a struggle but I am now very happy and even have been able to forgive. I loved my DH with all my heart, I love him now for being the father to our children. And I'll always love him, just because! I want him to stay healthy and have a happy life. His now wife, My once best friend, is very ill and I pray that she can recover. She is and has always been an alcoholic and is making his life miserable. I actually feel sorry for him. But we get what our choices created. And with Gods help we learn to except and move on, trying to live the life he has planed for us. Yes Angela I am ashamed for how I behaved but God has done wonderful things in my life since then. I knew at the time I was taking the wrong rode but wonder now if I had not, would my faith be as strong as it is now. I've gone on long enough, but sweetie get it all out of you, at the same time hand it over to God and let him work miracles in you. We are here for you anything you need to talk.
LOVE and HUGS~~~Brenda
"What lies behind us, and what lies before us are small matter compared to what lies within us."
Ralph Waldo Emerson |
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Old Spirit
True Blue Farmgirl
1498 Posts
Rae
MN
1498 Posts |
Posted - Apr 07 2010 : 05:23:49 AM
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HI all!!! Yes and the great thing with God is we don't ever go back we go ahead, with him leading us all the way. I have done many things that I felt awful about for years but I know that God has forgiven me. At the end of the day that is all the matters. A friend recently sent me a prayer with all going on in my life and the beginning referred to be being right where God wants me to be...so I can give it all to him and lean on him. Sometimes we are stripped bare so we have no where else to go but with God. All the layers come off and it is just God and us and the healing begins, slowly but begins. Just a thought.
Rae
Farm Girl #647
...those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles:...
Isaiah 40:31
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classygram
True Blue Farmgirl
1812 Posts
Brenda
Pleasant Hill
Mo.
USA
1812 Posts |
Posted - Apr 07 2010 : 05:33:29 AM
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Oh Rae that is so true, very well put. The layers do all come off. It's like a fresh beginning. Actually when you reconnect with God you feel like a newborn. Eveything is fresh and new. Isn't this a wonderful place to be! I love sharing the forgiveness of God and his love with others. Thank you all for sharing your stories.
HUGS~~~Brenda
"What lies behind us, and what lies before us are small matter compared to what lies within us."
Ralph Waldo Emerson |
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natesgirl
True Blue Farmgirl
1735 Posts
angela
martinsville
indiana
USA
1735 Posts |
Posted - Apr 07 2010 : 06:06:33 AM
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I want to feel that way agian. I want to have peace. I am fighting so hard to bring myself back to that. I am fighting jealousy of a family member. My MIL is living with us since my FIL passed. She is a daily interuption in our life. Giving orders to my children, monopolizing my husbands time, dirupting our family budget, and not bothering to hide her disgust for me in the least. I can't make her leave. I can't take my family and leave. I can't continue fighting daily for the right to be my childrens mother. I am unable to argue that my husband is supposed to focus on me first anymore. I am blowing up at nothing and everything. I don't know what to do anymore. I feel out of control and like my life is spinning faster and faster. My DH says he is on my side in this and he tells her to back off, leave the kids to us, and so forth, but he won't be forceful about it. He coddles to her and he won't enforce our life is ours by even asking her to leave the room so we can talk. I can't find any way to fix this and I feel as if I'm being edged out of my own family. My MIL now even goes to all of my family functions whether she knows the family member it's for or not! I am so angry I don't know what to do. I want to go to the store without hearing that I'm spending too much or not buying the right brand. I want to go to my moms or my grandmas without having to deal with her on my shoulder listening and commenting on everthing I say. She has cost me friends because she orders and yells at thier kids when they come over. They won't come back and I don't blame them. I couldn't even have valentines night out with my husband because she got upset that we asked her to watch the children and she wanted to go with us. I was so angry I refused to go and told my DH I wouldn't be at home when he came back if he took her out. We spent valentines day in our bedroom eating chips and pb&j. The bedroom, thats where I spend all of my indoor time at alone. I can't stand sitting in the living room being spoken over top of as if I wasn't even talking. And I had to put my foot down and throw a very childish fit to reserve the right to sit next to my DH when I was around. I feel horrible about this. It sounds like I'm making it all up or pouting like a child. I just have been dealing with all this for 16 months now. I couldn't even bring my newborn baby home and spend alone time with her just bonding. She spent her first 6 weeks in the hospital during which my FIL passed and we moved into a house with my MIL. I had to share what was supposed to be a very special time with someone who argued with everything I wanted for my baby. I am still absolutely seething over her going through my baby's first easter basket with my baby while I was in the bedroom getting dressed! I am babbling and raving. I need to stop. If anyone out there has any suggestions of what to do, anything that I could study, read, anything that might help me get through this, get it under control, learn to live with it, anything. Please. I'm at the end of my rope. I'm afraid of making a life changing decision based off anger and jealousy.
God - Gardening - Family - Is anything else important? |
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classygram
True Blue Farmgirl
1812 Posts
Brenda
Pleasant Hill
Mo.
USA
1812 Posts |
Posted - Apr 07 2010 : 06:20:05 AM
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Angela do you belong to a church or is there one you would feel confortable talking with their pastor? They can offer Christian counseling that is a real help. They can help you to understand that you have the right to feel as you do. And suggestions how to connect with God to help you through this. Also if one of your girlfriends attend a church maybe they could help you connect with someone. Is there anyway that you and your little family can move to yourself. How long has your fil been gone. It may be time for her to except he's gone and start taking care of herself or find a nice place in senior housing. Just a suggestion. You will remain in my prayers!
HUGS~~~Brenda
"What lies behind us, and what lies before us are small matter compared to what lies within us."
Ralph Waldo Emerson |
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natesgirl
True Blue Farmgirl
1735 Posts
angela
martinsville
indiana
USA
1735 Posts |
Posted - Apr 07 2010 : 06:34:24 AM
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I used to go to church but was never comfortable with the pastor. I have been thinking of at the very least building on to the back side of the house to make her an apartment kind of. I just don't know how to bring it up without a fight. I'm not even sure if that would help or just be a waste. We can't move because we're in a mortgage and she won't go to the local senior housing. She says it's just a holding cell till death. Has anyone done the apartment type thing? Does it help? How do I even suggest it without going into a break down or starting a big fight?
God - Gardening - Family - Is anything else important? |
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Julia
True Blue Farmgirl
1949 Posts
Julia
Shelton
WA
USA
1949 Posts |
Posted - Apr 07 2010 : 11:24:58 AM
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Angela, The wonderful thing about the Lord is that He meets us where we are. He is gracious, merciful and faithful. Cry out your heart to Him, tell Him how you are feeling, all of it, He has incredibly large shoulders, He can take it. Ask Him to heal your heart. Ask Him for forgiveness, He is ready to give it. It is easy to beat ourselves up, with what we should be doing. Let it go. We have all been where you are. If not, someday will be. I know there is now greater place to be than daily in the Lords presence. His word is our daily food. Even if you just read a Psalm for the day, it will get you back on the right track. Know that I will be praying for you.
For tomorrow and its needs I do not pray, but keep me, guide me, love me, Lord just for today.
St. Augustine
#440
http://www.myfeetaredirty.blogspot.com/
http://www.iglitteredthecat.blogspot.com/
http://www.glitterandgrunge.com/ (turner hill studio)
http://www.etsy.com/shop/TurnerHillStudio/ |
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Old Spirit
True Blue Farmgirl
1498 Posts
Rae
MN
1498 Posts |
Posted - Apr 07 2010 : 11:39:34 AM
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Family meeting time. Maybe if you all sat down and said this is the way it will be and that is that. This isn't up for negotiation, and you will certainly respect her and expect the same.
Rae
Farm Girl #647
...those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles:...
Isaiah 40:31
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MasterGardener
True Blue Farmgirl
572 Posts
Chandra
Louisiana
USA
572 Posts |
Posted - Apr 07 2010 : 12:30:06 PM
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Hi Angela,
First, I agree with Julia..
Then, I know it may sound like an impossibility, but have you ever, even through gritted teeth and a seething spirit, said a prayer "for" your MIL? It's amazing what can take place in your heart, the Lord understands, and because of who HE IS, can give you the grace for that day. By praying for the other person, even in the midst of our own anger, (acknowledging this to God) bringing the other person to the Lord in prayer can be the beginning of releasing the power of a living God in the circumstances. Even w/ an angry spirit, bring it to the Lord because when you do,it short circuits the power of the enemy.
I don't know if the books I'm going to recommend can be of help while you're still "in" the circumstance, but they're the ones that made a difference in my life.
I've had years of battles with bitterness, unforgiveness, resentment...it kills us, it destroys our walk with the Lord. Recently with the help of these books and prayer, I've been able to overcome these negative emotions toward people I've been angry with my whole life. It was preventing me from making any progress in my life, maturing, growing in my relationship with the Lord, moving forward,because I was staying stuck in the emotions of the past.
I had to do the work though. I realized that I needed to be obedient to God in my own life, my walk, but obedience is the only thing that helped me. Obedience to the scriptures that admonish us to forgive because we've been forgiven.
Sometimes all I was able to do or think about was, "this too shall pass"
and when I memorized and repeated:
Galatians 5:22-23 (King James Version)
22But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith,
23Meekness, temperance: against such there is no law.
I would experience peace. It was possible becauseI would check my behavior, through the lens or filter of this scripture. Again, the change was amazing, regardless of the other person's behaviors and choices. It takes the focus off the other person, and onto me, because, realistically, I'm the only one I have ANY control over.
The book titles that have helped me were Joel Osteen's "Your Best Life Now" specifically his chapter on forgiveness. Lewis B, Smedes book "Forgive and Forget" , Neil T. Anderson's and Rich Miller's "Getting Anger Under Control...Overcoming Unresolved Resentment, Overwhelming Emotions, The Lies Behind Anger. Neil is the author of "The Bondage Breaker" and that's a great book also.
Angela, you'll be in my prayers...I'll lift your name and know that God is in these circumstances with you, even if it doesn't "feel" like it, He's there, waiting for you to acknowledge His presence.
Say to them, may the Lord bless you and protect you, May the Lord smile upon you and be gracious to you. May the Lord show you His favor and give you His peace. (Numbers 6:23-26)
.• ´¨¨)) -:¦:-¸.•´ .•´¨¨))
((¸¸.•´ ..• -:¦:- -:¦:- Chandra
-:¦:- ((¸¸.•´Farmgirl Sister #64
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Edited by - MasterGardener on Apr 08 2010 04:58:06 AM |
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Julia
True Blue Farmgirl
1949 Posts
Julia
Shelton
WA
USA
1949 Posts |
Posted - Apr 08 2010 : 09:33:45 AM
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I just wanted you girls to know that you have all been prayed for this morning. It is so great to have this thread going, that we can come together, across the miles, and pray for and encourage each other. Though I don't know all your specific needs today, the Lord does. May you all be strenghten in the love, power, grace, and mercy of our Lord Jesus Christ. Blessings to you all!
For tomorrow and its needs I do not pray, but keep me, guide me, love me, Lord just for today.
St. Augustine
#440
http://www.myfeetaredirty.blogspot.com/
http://www.iglitteredthecat.blogspot.com/
http://www.glitterandgrunge.com/ (turner hill studio)
http://www.etsy.com/shop/TurnerHillStudio/ |
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Old Spirit
True Blue Farmgirl
1498 Posts
Rae
MN
1498 Posts |
Posted - Apr 08 2010 : 10:35:20 AM
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For my dear friends who have been praying for my family, thank you from the bottom of my heart. My FIL is actually doing better, 3 days in a row now so that is good. I am tired but feeling better than I have and we are even taking tonight for our own selves and doing things at home (very scary place right now, don't think there is a clean dish!!)
Thank you
Rae
Farm Girl #647
...those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles:...
Isaiah 40:31
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classygram
True Blue Farmgirl
1812 Posts
Brenda
Pleasant Hill
Mo.
USA
1812 Posts |
Posted - Apr 08 2010 : 3:12:32 PM
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Rae, let the dishes go and just cuddle up with your hubby and soak up his love. You deserve it! So glad things are going better for FIL. That's good news. Take care and get some rest.
Love and Hugs, Brenda
"What lies behind us, and what lies before us are small matter compared to what lies within us."
Ralph Waldo Emerson
Seek reasons to Love..In every sigment of everyday-look for something that brings forth within you a feeling of Love-Abraham Hicks |
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Family Matters: Wanted-Christian Fellowship |
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Wanted-Christian Fellowship
