| Author |
Across the Fence:  Dealing with rude/ mean people  |
|
|
prariehawk
True Blue Farmgirl
2914 Posts
Cindy
2914 Posts |
 Posted - Jul 16 2014 : 8:34:55 PM
|
As I was leaving work today, driving at the speed limit on a two-lane no-pass zone avenue, this car behind me comes speeding up and passes me, narrowly misses colliding with an oncoming car, and then does it again with another car. I'm thinking, what is this guy's problem? I continue driving to a dr.'s appointment, and another car does the same thing to me--this in a completely different town. I honked when the second car passed me, and both the driver and passenger gave me the "Hawaiian Good Luck" sign. I caught up with them at a stoplight and decided to play with their minds a little. I smiled and gave them the "A-OK" sign and they looked at me in baffled amazement. I don't like mean people and I tend to get angry when they do rude things. But lately I've decided it's just not worth it to let them get the best of me. As Patty noted on another thread, I tend to be non-confrontational and mean people seem to think that's a license to say rude things to me and about me (at work) and it's really been bugging me, but now I think I'm just going to confuse them by acting like they're really nice people. It takes too much energy to feel angry with them. So I'm wondering, how do ya'll deal with rude and mean people? I get stressed easily and I want to be able to relax more. So the next time someone makes a snide comment to me, I'll smile and say, "You look so happy! What's your secret?" I dunno, maybe they're mean cause they're really sad.
Cindy
"Come by the hills to the land where fancy is free; And stand where the peaks meet the sky and the rocks reach the sea.Where the rivers run clear and the bracken is gold in the sun. and cares of tomorrow must wait till this day is done"--Loreena McKennit
"In many ways, you don't just live in the country, it lives inside you"--Ellen Eilers
Visit my blog at http://www.farmerinthebelle.blogspot.com/ |
|
|
ddmashayekhi
True Blue Farmgirl
4757 Posts
Dawn
Naperville
Illinois
USA
4757 Posts |
Posted - Jul 17 2014 : 05:37:43 AM
|
It isn't easy taking the high road all the time. I shrug off the rude drivers & figure they can show me where all the cops are hiding with their radar guns. I do love when some yo-yo zigzags only to be caught at the same light as the rest of us. I usually give them a big smile and thumbs up as we sit waiting for the light to change. As for rude people at work, being professional and kind is the best way to go. If you can go take a walk at lunch or do something like that to help you detox the stress out of dealing with them, it may help you feel better. I have juggled a rude neighbor for 2 years and admit there are times when I want to stoop her level. But then I realize that isn't who I am. I always stop and remember how blessed I am. I have a loving husband and 3 sons, a beautiful home and a good life. Those who are nasty aren't welcome in. I do my best to forget about them, therefore coming out the winner in the end.
Good luck with keeping a smile on your face & a happy heart! It's what is best for your well being!
Dawn in IL |
 |
|
|
hudsonsinaf
True Blue Farmgirl
3162 Posts
Shannon
Rozet
Wyoming
USA
3162 Posts |
Posted - Jul 17 2014 : 05:58:51 AM
|
I am generally one that it takes quite a bit to get me to respond if you do something rude or mean, though each time usually puts another little scar to my heart. I try with all my being to still be kind. With that said, I have found hope in that approach. We had one neighbor that hated the breeds of our dogs and wanted the HOA to refuse to let them be in the neighborhood (we have a Dutch shepherd and a German shepherd). She thinks shepherds are mean.... Which honestly we have our German shepherd for protection.... But they certainly are not mean! Anyways, a couple years back, she approached me and wanted to make amends. We now talk and while I wouldn't say friends, we get along quite well. I know had I replied to her constant antics (she use to call animal control ALL the time!), with meanness or rudeness, we would not be at the place we are now. I will certainly pray for your situation at work!
~ Shannon
http://hudson-everydayblessings.blogspot.com/ |
|
|
|
churunga
True Blue Farmgirl
3957 Posts
Marie
Minneapolis
MN
USA
3957 Posts |
Posted - Jul 17 2014 : 09:10:49 AM
|
At one time, I was very defensive when people would make judgments about me. Now when someone calls me a bit** to intimidate me, I just say, "That's right! That's what I am! Proud of it!". I love the looks on people's faces. I meet unhappy people all the time. I used to be one of them. I was so unhappy that I wanted everyone around me to be just as unhappy and I would work at it. Most people are really happy, however and they would turn it around into something positive. I had to learn that the only person I can control is myself. I choose kindness.
Marie, Sister #5142
Farmgirl of the Month May 2014
Try everything once and the fun things twice. |
|
|
|
LadyInRed
True Blue Farmgirl
6740 Posts
PeggyAnn
Vancouver
WA
USA
6740 Posts |
Posted - Jul 17 2014 : 09:56:05 AM
|
My sister had a favorite bumper sticker that said MEAN PEOPLE SUCK!
I think taking the higher road is hard to do but absolutely worth it!
I think we should try to pray blessing over them. After all they must
be some very miserable and unhappy people.
blessings and hugs,
Peggy
Farmgirl #1326
http://ladyinredsite.blogspot.com
Life is too short to knit with ugly yarn!
Leave Your Cares Behind...Join Us On The Porch
|
|
|
|
naturemaiden
True Blue Farmgirl
2569 Posts
Connie - Farmgirl #673
Hoosick Falls
NY
USA
2569 Posts |
Posted - Jul 22 2014 : 12:17:16 PM
|
Cindy I know how you feel. In the past I had no problem telling someone off who did something wrong to me. It's years later and I've calmed down alot, LOL.
What I've learned is this...nasty people are likely like that because they are unhappy. Miserable people want to make others miserable. When they accomplish that, then they win. So now I am more likely to do something to 'throw them off', and it's funny. It's not always easy to do, but I will do my best not to make some miserable person ruin my day.
Connie
http://www.naturemaiden.com/ Handcrafted Soap & Candles
http://saratoga-rose.blogspot.com/ My published books & other writing.
http://modern-day-laura.blogspot.com/ Filled with everything I love!
http://www.thriftyfarmgirl.com/ Vintage Sewing Machine Parts
|
|
|
|
fille de ferme
True Blue Farmgirl
2344 Posts
Madeline
Meadow Lands
Pa.
USA
2344 Posts |
Posted - Aug 04 2014 : 3:55:10 PM
|
Anymore, when someone is rude to me, I just say, "Bless your Heart". It usually takes them off guard & disarms them ;-) Then, I just give this heart warming smile & proceed on. LOL
KEEP A SMILE IN YOUR HEART... |
|
|
|
auntjenny
True Blue Farmgirl
277 Posts
Jenny
San Luis Obispo
CA
USA
277 Posts |
Posted - Aug 04 2014 : 7:33:27 PM
|
| I like your style Madeline! |
|
|
|
sue5901
True Blue Farmgirl
122 Posts
Sue
Wellingborough
United Kingdom
122 Posts |
Posted - Aug 07 2014 : 03:43:40 AM
|
Not sure if I should post this as I think you may all think I am being rude but......
I always remind myself you should never judge another until you have walked a mile in their shoes.
The person rudely overtaking may be on their way home after a phone call saying their child is having an asthma attack. The person being rude to you may have just learned they are being made redundant
I agree that people act like this when they are miserable and unhappy but people normally have a very good reason for being miserable and unhappy. Just be pleased you are in a better place than them.
Dance like nobody's watching! |
|
|
|
fille de ferme
True Blue Farmgirl
2344 Posts
Madeline
Meadow Lands
Pa.
USA
2344 Posts |
Posted - Aug 07 2014 : 05:42:44 AM
|
Well put Sue. When I am in a hurry & do not wish to be rude to the people around me. I say PLEASE excuse my rudeness but I have to leave, etc. I never take out my misfortune on others, as it is not their problem.
KEEP A SMILE IN YOUR HEART... |
|
|
| |
Across the Fence: Dealing with rude/ mean people |
|
Dealing with rude/ mean people
