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A Farm of My Own:  wearing shoes in the house  |
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Breanna
True Blue Farmgirl
208 Posts
Breanna
Parker
Colorado
USA
208 Posts |
 Posted - Sep 12 2011 : 4:49:10 PM
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We ask people to take off their shoes at our house too, and its never been an issue. My piano teacher used to have this cute little basket by her door with crocheted "booties" in every size so that people could slip into something cozy, comfortable, and clean. :-)
Farmgirl Bre
"...that my glory may sing praise to you and not be silent, O Lord my God, I will give thanks to You forever." Psalm 30:12 |
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Heartbroken farmgirl
True Blue Farmgirl
604 Posts
Annette
rio vista
Ca
USA
604 Posts |
Posted - Sep 13 2011 : 05:11:11 AM
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Catherine, it took my about 2 years to get over the pile of socks. I honestly, at this point would love to say they are in a pile now. I have 5 kids, and a puppy who loves socks. The shoes go in a big pile NEXT to the shoe basket at the front door. But the kids seem to almost walk out of their socks. Each child dropping socks as they come through! Every day, we have to walk around through the lower level of the house, looking for a dozen socks. :(
Oh well, better than dirt, mud, and scuffs on the floors.
The tears I shed then, watered the flowers I harvest now.
www.broken908.blogspot.com
http://forums.familyfriendpoems.com/broken908
"The aim of education is the knowledge not of facts but of values."-Dean William Ralph Inge |
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cajungal
True Blue Farmgirl
2349 Posts
Catherine Farmgirl Sister #76
Houston Area
Texas
2349 Posts |
Posted - Sep 13 2011 : 05:22:48 AM
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Annette, that is so funny about having to look for socks. Oh, the joys of life!!
One of the best compliments from one of my daughters: "Moma, you smell good...like dirt." |
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ceejay48
Farmgirl Legend/Schoolmarm/Sharpshooter
13620 Posts
CeeJay (CJ)
Dolores
Colorado
USA
13620 Posts |
Posted - Sep 13 2011 : 10:06:32 AM
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Shoes come off in the utility room at my house. But no one is "threatened"! That door is the one most folks come in and just the visual of our shoes and boots lined up in that room is hint enough I think.
But, that is my preference . . . less to deal with on the carpet and my floors are comfy!
One of my sisters has lived in British Columbia for many years . . she says that shoes are left at the door in her part of the world . . . plain BC courtesy!
CJ
..from the barefoot farmgirl in SW Colorado...sister chick #665.
Mother Hen: FARMGIRLS SOUTHWEST HENHOUSE
From my Heart - www.fromacelticheart.blogspot.com
From my Hands - www.cjscreations-ceejay.blogspot.com
From my Hubby - www.aspenforge.blogspot.com |
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Rosemary
True Blue Farmgirl
1825 Posts
Virginia
USA
1825 Posts |
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Montrose Girl
Farmgirl Legend/Schoolmarm
1360 Posts
Laurie
Montrose
CO
1360 Posts |
Posted - Sep 14 2011 : 6:45:20 PM
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Wow, what a reaction. we take off our shows, but hubby's parents don't when they come to visit and they don't at home either. I take my shoes off whenever I go into someone's home. Since we have a B&B we try to encourage and some people do. Others don't. It drives hubby crazy, but he hasn't put a sign up. Maybe a mat inside the door might be a nice hint. It's carpeted in the guest area so he worries about that. I like the idea of offering house slippers to guests. Feet stay warm that way.
Oh and our floor is very chilly in the winter, tile, so I get why his folks don't want to take off shoes. I wear slippers.
I don't think your request is over the top at all. You are goign out of your way to make people comfortable by offering house slippers. I have never seen that, just shoes off.
Laurie
http://www.inntheorchardbnb.com/ |
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sue5901
True Blue Farmgirl
122 Posts
Sue
Wellingborough
United Kingdom
122 Posts |
Posted - Sep 15 2011 : 04:39:46 AM
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This is a real cultural thing - my best friend is from Czech Republic and there it is an absolute rule that you take off your shoes when you go indoors. She has this at her house here and when I visit I do take my shoes off and have to say I absolutely hate it.
When she has a party and there are lots of people round espicially people I don't know, I feel really really uncomfortable for us all to have our shoes off and I know other people there feel the same. Traditionally in England we would normally only take our shoes off in our own homes or in front of close family or very close friends and it would be considered disrespectful to do so - or to ask a visitor to - unless it was particuarlly poor weather outside or they had been walking on muddy ground. This has changed slightly in recent years with younger people and with the fashion of having pale carpets but even so we would rarely insist on people removing their shoes.
Having said that I wouldn't fall out with a friend over it and would - and do -comply with their wishes no matter how uncomfortable it makes me feel but I know my Mum and many of the older generation would refuse to go into a house where they were expected to remove their shoes.
And house slippers that someone else may have worn.....urgh...never! I would definatly rather go barefoot than that!
Dance like nobody's watching! |
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lmanfrin
Farmgirl at Heart
2 Posts
Lauren
Chicago
IL
USA
2 Posts |
Posted - Sep 15 2011 : 08:08:48 AM
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It's funny, this has been a secret pet peeve of mine for a long time. I hate taking my shoes off in others' homes (though I respect their wishes and would never say a word about it.) Here's my reasoning: as a woman, the shoe is a carefully selected part of my outfit. Much of the time I am not wearing socks with my shoes, and sometimes when I am, they have holes or don't match. Shoes make the bottoms of my legs look "together" and I get embarrassed when I take them off in public. Also, if I'm wearing boots, it takes a few minutes to unlace and remove them. There I am standing on the threshlod, bent at the waist, rear in the air, fussing with my shoes.
Because of this I have never asked anyone to take their shoes off in my home. Come as you are. You are my guest. Be comfortable. I will clean up after you leave if I have to.
But let it be known, I would never, ever complain about it in someone else's home. Just seems too disrespectful to do so.
Lauren |
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sue5901
True Blue Farmgirl
122 Posts
Sue
Wellingborough
United Kingdom
122 Posts |
Posted - Sep 16 2011 : 12:40:52 AM
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Lauren
I was thinking about why I feel the way I do about this after I had done my post and I think you are right - it is something about not feeling fully dressed without my shoes on and I would only want to feel that way in my own home and certainly not around strangers.
Like you I go along with it in others homes without complaint but have to say I would not want friends or visitors to feel uncomfortable in my home and would go out of my way to accomodate them.
Dance like nobody's watching! |
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nabrown42
True Blue Farmgirl
409 Posts
Nancy
Caneyville
KY
USA
409 Posts |
Posted - Sep 16 2011 : 01:58:37 AM
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Rosemary, that's perfect. Thanks for posting it. I'm going to start crocheting slippers when I get unpacked.
"I've wept in the night for the shortness of sight that to someone's needs I've been blind; but I've yet to feel a twinge of regret for being a little too kind." |
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missusprim
True Blue Farmgirl
400 Posts
Karen
Fostoria
Ohio
USA
400 Posts |
Posted - Sep 16 2011 : 4:36:15 PM
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Nancy, after seeing your post regarding your friend having control issues - I rethought my response a bit. Trying to appease your friend will only give her the very control she wants over a situation that shouldn't be hers to control in the first place: your home.
That said, you've both already had your say and know how the other stands. So modify your house as you would normally have done. For example a comfy seat/bench near the front door to sit on to remove or put on shoes, a handy mat or basket for shoes or optional slippers/shoe guards, etc. You will have kindly provided all that's needed for people to be comfy in your house minus their footwear.
I'm sure there are numerous things that the people surrounding her do to appease her because it's what she likes/expects/needs/wants....... She should do the same for you, her friend.
Farmgirl Sister #2984
"Animals are such agreeable friends - they ask no questions, they pass no criticisms." George Eliot
http://farmchicatheart.blogspot.com/
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Beverley
True Blue Farmgirl
2707 Posts
Beverley
atlanta
Michigan
USA
2707 Posts |
Posted - Sep 17 2011 : 11:12:27 AM
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boy I never really thought about this much before but when I was growing up we always took our shoes off at home so to help with dragging in dirt out of respect for my mother who was the one who was the one doing the cleaning when we were young. When I grew up , my kids always were taught to take their shoes off too. so that you don't bring in the grime of the outdoors. one time we took up the carpet and the kids saw what was underneath it and I said to them and we take our shoes off can you imagine if we didn't. I noticed in both of their homes , the shoes come off at the door but when people visit we never made a point of telling them to do the same. We just cleaned up afterwards. I really never thought of it being a cultural thing just a respect thing. I always take my shoes off at other peoples homes out of respect for the home owner and them not having to clean up after me. Wow, this thread has been eye opening..
Folks will know how large your soul is by the way you treat a dog....Charles F. Doran
beverley baggett
Beverley with an extra E...
https://sites.google.com/site/bevsdoggies/
http://bevsdoggies.blogspot.com/ |
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andwhathaveya
Farmgirl in Training
31 Posts
Tiffany
Beckley
WV
USA
31 Posts |
Posted - Sep 19 2011 : 9:12:12 PM
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| Growing up, I was always told to take my shoes off when I was a guest in someone's home (out of respect). At home, anything went. We could walk around with one shoe on and one shoe off and my mother never said a word to us. I think her reaction was a bit over the top but she's your pal. She was probably just having a bad day and the shoe comment just drove her over the edge. If my bff told me that I couldn't wear shoes in her house, I wouldn't...actually, I don't...but she never asked. If she told me that we had to wear our shirts inside out at her house, I'd do it because I love her...I would make fun of her a little for it though...only to her face. |
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K-Falls Farmgirl
Chapter Leader
2096 Posts
Cheryl
Klamath Falls
Oregon
USA
2096 Posts |
Posted - Oct 03 2011 : 6:30:28 PM
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I believe....If she was your "true friend" she would not have a problem doing a simple request to remove her shoes at the front door.. I have done this and my farm chicks ion my chapter automatically remove theirs at the door.. I have provided socks for those who do not wear them.. They are cozy to wear and nobody minds.. I say Bravo Take off the shoes!
Cheryl farm sister #309 Klamath falls Oregon.
Cheryl
Farmgirl #309
Klamath Falls "Charming Chicks Chapter" Mother Hen
Be sure to check us out
http://www.Klamathfallscharmingchicks.blogspot.com and my personal
http://www.k-fallsfarmgirl.blogspot.com/
Grandmas are mom's with more icing. |
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Crystal Koelzer
Farmgirl in Training
44 Posts
Crystal
Cosby
MO
USA
44 Posts |
Posted - Oct 03 2011 : 11:49:09 PM
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| My MIL has the no shoes rule too and when my husband and I first started dating I thought she was ridiculous. But now that we have moved into our new house we have instituted the no shoes rule too because I am tired of cleaning the floors everyday. Maybe if the provided house shoes were easily washed you could toss them in the wash after each visitor? |
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marmieto12
True Blue Farmgirl
213 Posts
laura
utah
USA
213 Posts |
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FarmDream
True Blue Farmgirl
1085 Posts
Julie
TX
USA
1085 Posts |
Posted - Oct 05 2011 : 08:27:24 AM
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Since this thread started I have put a lot of thought into this subject. I have made more of an effort to not wear shoes in my house. DD seems to take her shoes off naturally when she comes inside...with almost everything else..sigh. DH usually takes his off at the bedroom closet. I've started leaving a pair of shoes at the door for quick dashes outside.
I also wondered if maybe the friend had ugly feet? I giggled about that, but some people are very self conscious about their feet. I knew a girl who had an accident and her pinky toe was sheared off in the spokes of her bicycle wheel. I'm not sure I'd want to see someone's big hairy toes.
Another tidbit of information is about plantar warts. These are from bacteria that can be picked up by walking barefoot on people's carpet. So some people may be hesitant for this reason, too.
~FarmDream is Farmgirl Sister #3069
Live Today, Cherish Yesterday, Dream Tomorrow
http://naturaljulie.etsy.com
http://julie-rants.blogspot.com |
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nabrown42
True Blue Farmgirl
409 Posts
Nancy
Caneyville
KY
USA
409 Posts |
Posted - Oct 05 2011 : 09:47:00 AM
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We'll have to wait and see how things work out. There is a bench right by the front door and a basket of soft fuzzy sockes which will be washed after each wearing. If people take the hint, that's great, if not, so be it. I'm not going to have a hissy fit. I want friends to feel comfortable and glad to see me, shoes or not.
"I've wept in the night for the shortness of sight that to someone's needs I've been blind; but I've yet to feel a twinge of regret for being a little too kind." |
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idcityrose
True Blue Farmgirl
202 Posts
Rose
Idaho City
Idaho
USA
202 Posts |
Posted - Oct 15 2011 : 6:57:27 PM
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People are more important that floors in my world. I would never ask anyone to remove shoes (unless they were muddy boots) to come in and visit. I know that many people ask for shoes to be removed but I do not have single friend whose home has those rules. If I met someone new and visited their home and was asked I would remove my shoes but I am not comfortable being barefoot. My feet are in terrible condition and require the structure of a shoe to allow me to walk much. Maybe she is embarressed about her feet (if you saw mine you would wonder how I can stand up). Just a suggestion. Did she over react. Yes but why did she. Just another point of view.
We are never alone in the forest of Sisters!
Some people look for happiness, others create it.
http://www.idcityrose.etsy.com
ebay user idcityrose |
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nabrown42
True Blue Farmgirl
409 Posts
Nancy
Caneyville
KY
USA
409 Posts |
Posted - Oct 16 2011 : 11:47:12 AM
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My friend is planning on coming down this weekend for a visit...we'll see how things go. If she takes the hint, that's great. If not, I'm not interested in ending our friendship over the issue. When I've seen fuzzy socks on sale in my shopping trips to Bowling Green, I've picked up some and will put them by the door in the basket. That's as far as I'm going to go.
Thanks for all the comments. All sides have valid responses and it's fun to read about everyone else's experiences.
"I've wept in the night for the shortness of sight that to someone's needs I've been blind; but I've yet to feel a twinge of regret for being a little too kind." |
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blessedhomemaker
True Blue Farmgirl
106 Posts
Tina
West Virginia
USA
106 Posts |
Posted - Oct 16 2011 : 6:50:41 PM
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I am obviously in the minority here.I wear shoes all day long in my house.I do not force (or expect)others to have to take off their shoes in my home.The only exception would be if they had mud,grease,etc. on them.I feel very uncomfortable having to take my shoes off in someone else's home.It is their home,not mine so I don't feel I should be making myself THAT "comfy".
~Tina
My main blog~ http://frontierhome.blogspot.com
My food blog~
http://mysimplenorthernkitchen.blogspot.com
Psalm 62:5~ Find rest, O my soul, In God alone; my hope comes from him.
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Dorinda
True Blue Farmgirl
1023 Posts
Dorinda
St. Cloud
Florida
USA
1023 Posts |
Posted - Oct 17 2011 : 5:19:21 PM
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No one wears their shoes in my house. I have a basket by the door so you can take off your shoes and sit them in the basket. I do not offer slippers at all. You can wear your socks. My floors are clean and I intend to keep them that way. Don't like it then don't come over!!! I've always been that way. And I have lots of company!!
Seize The Day!
Dorinda |
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Madelena
True Blue Farmgirl
1919 Posts
Mary
Central
TX
USA
1919 Posts |
Posted - Nov 01 2011 : 4:02:15 PM
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Hi everyone. Let me join in..
My mom always asked that everyone remove their shoes. No one seemed offended {This was way back in the 60's} -- AND she was a gal ahead of her time. I'm sure many of you have become aware of the statistics that the majority of dirt and pollutants that enter a home, come in on people shoes. (I think it was even on Dr. Oz show recently.) Sounds strange. Thing about it.
You walk across parking lots and step in ?? well...birds doo; vehicles leak grease,oil and antifreeze; the grassy areas you cross may have fertilizer and pesticide residue; cats and dogs do doo; small critters pass away and decompose - ooo; bugs go squish;
Shoes are riddled with germs and stuff that you don't want tracked into your homes.. where the babies crawl, the kids sit on the rugs -- touch the rugs -- put fingers on their face -- ooo, again. I think that's 'nuff pictorials.
And most of this can be alleviated with the simple family custom of removing one's shoes. Mom always had slippers at the front door for visitors.. we kids just ran around with our socks (I still love kicking off my shoes the minute I get home).
So please don't feel bad if your friends don't understand, after all, you're just looking out for their health as well as your families {Not to mention that you will have a lot less dirt and grime to clean up all the time !! -BIG PERK! } AND I love the idea of hand knitted or crocheted slipper/booties for guests. Washable and reusable. Cool !
Have a GREAT DAY ...
Madelena |
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debtea2
True Blue Farmgirl
1853 Posts
deborah
nutley
nj
USA
1853 Posts |
Posted - Nov 01 2011 : 5:49:14 PM
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i think you should give people aheads up before they come over.
never in my life did anyone ever ask. so it is strange to me.
and i would never ask peopl to barefoot in my home, It too have beautiful hardwoods.
but one time someone i didn't know well invited me over and when i got there they ask we shed our shoes
well problem was its was cold really cold and she had cold tile floors
my little dress booties were fur lined no socks and honestly i didn't not want to walk barefoot. and i don't like to go shoeless, i like my shoes they are part of my outfit..its like asking me to remove my pants or skirt and its embarrasing, so i said i could not stay and maybe she could come to my home next time..we never spoke again..
also some people have really stinky feet .. i have no real problem
with the NO SHOE policy if a slipper or socks are there or someone
tells me in advance and its just me..but if its a dinner or party then i could make a smarter chose in footwear
and wear socks & get a pedi or bring my own slippers
.its a personally thing. but i do respect other peoples
house rules. and if i don't like them i leave giving the headache excuse.or decline the invite.but its your house and your rules
enjoy your floors.
blessings deborah
inch by inch we find our way
jersey farmgirl
#1330
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Edited by - debtea2 on Nov 01 2011 5:57:52 PM |
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nabrown42
True Blue Farmgirl
409 Posts
Nancy
Caneyville
KY
USA
409 Posts |
Posted - Nov 02 2011 : 2:51:19 PM
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Well, my friend came and didn't take off her shoes but when she saw that both my husband and I were wearing slippers and her husband grabbed a pair from the basket, too, she took off her shoes and kept them off the whole time. She remarked many times how shiney my floors were, both the vinyl ones and the wood floor in the living room. We had a pleasant visit and nothing was ever mentioned about the shoe issue.
"I've wept in the night for the shortness of sight that to someone's needs I've been blind; but I've yet to feel a twinge of regret for being a little too kind." |
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A Farm of My Own: wearing shoes in the house |
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wearing shoes in the house
