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Across the Fence:  What ever happened to aging gracefully  |
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Annika
True Blue Farmgirl
5602 Posts
Annika
USA
5602 Posts |
 Posted - Sep 06 2011 : 4:42:29 PM
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Seriously....why is age so reviled in this country? Last week it was a department store woman trying to get me to buy "line-filler" and "age eraser" make up items. Then a doctor suggested Botox to help me look younger...I was at the doctor for stomach problems NOT cosmetic advice!
Today it was a robo call from a nearby city offering a through September only discount on some kind of cosmetic laser surgery that sounded like it re-surfaced your skin....blech!
My great aunt, Kaleta-May, was one of the most regal, elegant women I have ever known, no line erasers or fillers, no botox or laser resurfacing! She used mild soap, rose water and dabs of olive oil on her skin. She carried herself with grace and dignity, worked in her own garden in her own home until she was 93, always wore a sun hat when out and aged simply and regally. She never wore silly wigs, sillier clothing or too much make up (I wear too much make-up  )
So, what IS wrong with aging????? It's bound to happen sooner or later to anyone who lives long enough, why not go there with a little dignity?
I think, I'll just spite the obsessive American youth culture and age gracefully 
Annika
Farmgirl & sister #13
Simplicity is the ultimate sophistication. ~Leonardo DaVinci
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laurentany
True Blue Farmgirl
3259 Posts
Laurie
Patchogue
NY
USA
3259 Posts |
Posted - Sep 06 2011 : 5:29:11 PM
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I agree whole heartedly Annika! In fact I actually find it comical when I see a woman who CLEARLY has had "work" done and she cant even smile for fear that her face may "crack"! I am 45 Years old and proud of how I look. I admit most people think I am much younger than I am- I was blessed with good genes- but still- it doesnt concern me so much with how I look on the outside- to me its all about the beauty from within! I personally would NEVER have any cosmetic surgery to ANY part of my body. Never will understand WHY someone would want something "Fake" in their body- but thats just me.
I love the Martina McBride song about how "every laugh line on your face made you who you are today". Couldnt be more true- so why anyone would want to erase that is baffling to me!
Smiles! (with a few wrinkles around the eyes...lol)
~Laurie
"Little Hen House on the Island"
Farmgirl Sister#1403
Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.. |
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nabrown42
True Blue Farmgirl
409 Posts
Nancy
Caneyville
KY
USA
409 Posts |
Posted - Sep 06 2011 : 5:41:28 PM
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I don't know who came up with this line but "I want to age gratefully". I'll be 69 next month and am just starting to get laugh lines. I like how I've aged, my blond hair has turned white in the front and the white isn't coarse at all. I have a few age spots on my hands, so be it. My husband says I'm beautiful and I know he means it even if I know I'm not. I am what I am and like the woman I've become, lines, spots and extra pounds. Learning to accept ourself is a sign of a wise woman and being a member of this group has me in great company.
"I've wept in the night for the shortness of sight that to someone's needs I've been blind; but I've yet to feel a twinge of regret for being a little too kind." |
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oldbittyhen
True Blue Farmgirl
1511 Posts
tina
quartz hill
ca
USA
1511 Posts |
Posted - Sep 06 2011 : 5:49:47 PM
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every line, crease, wrinkle and scar I have, along with the beginnings of age spots, I earned, and I'm damn proud of them...
"Knowlege is knowing that a tomato is a fruit, Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad" |
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Tea Lady
True Blue Farmgirl
645 Posts
Lorraine
Morris
IL
USA
645 Posts |
Posted - Sep 06 2011 : 6:04:50 PM
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I agree - I have two older sister who dye their hair and wear very "trendy" clothes. They're in their 60s and I'm in my 50s - I wear very little make up and do not dye my hair. If you enjoy dying your hair and it makes you happy - so be it. Its just not for me. Every gray hair has a name and a story (I'm a mother of two - enough said) - and I am also proud of each and every gray hair and wrinkle.
Lorraine
(aka Tea Lady)
Farmgirl #1819
www.birdsandteas.com |
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FarmDream
True Blue Farmgirl
1085 Posts
Julie
TX
USA
1085 Posts |
Posted - Sep 06 2011 : 6:41:27 PM
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I think it's just advertisers trying to convince us to spend money on something we don't need. I would imagine any doctor recommending cosmetic procedures gets a cut of the profits. I think the advances made are certainly a blessing to someone who's been in an accident and been scarred. I've seen one lady at work who has a large birthmark on her face. With today's makeup she is able to conceal it completely. For myself I'm not going to go under the knife just for vanity's sake. I would if it was to correct some disfigurement, like ladies who have a boob job because they had undergone surgery for breast cancer. I actually have a friend who is saving up money for this exact reason. But mostly I know it's advertisers trying to peer pressure us into remaining "youthful."
~FarmDream is Farmgirl Sister #3069
Live Today, Cherish Yesterday, Dream Tomorrow
http://naturaljulie.etsy.com
http://julie-rants.blogspot.com |
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SusanScarlet
True Blue Farmgirl
317 Posts
317 Posts |
Posted - Sep 06 2011 : 7:29:35 PM
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| I agree wholeheartedly. At 60 I quit having highlights and lowlights put in my hair to cover the gray. When I told my hairdresser, I truly thought she was going to have a heart attack. LOL |
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Okie Farm Girl
True Blue Farmgirl
1674 Posts
Mary Beth
McLoud
Oklahoma
USA
1674 Posts |
Posted - Sep 06 2011 : 8:54:46 PM
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I have a friend who has just had to have breast implants REMOVED because they were too old. Major surgery I'm telling you!! It was awful. Made me so glad that I am just fine with my flat little ol' self! I had the funniest thing happen at a Hobby Lobby one day. My hair is white (I call it platinum!!) without a streak of gray in it but it does have kind of a gold tone. I turned prematurely white headed, but I'm mature now! :-) Anyway, I was in the sequin section of the store, looking for sequins for a dress for my daughter and this lady with REALLY short, gray/blue hair about the color of a blue steel pistol came up and said, "Now see? THAT'S the color I was going for and look what I got!!! Who DOES your hair?!" I smiled and said, "God". She looked at me like I was a kook! :-)
Mary Beth
www.OklahomaPastryCloth.com
www.Oklahomapastrycloth.com/blog
The Sovereign Lord is my strength - Habakkuk 3:19 |
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Annika
True Blue Farmgirl
5602 Posts
Annika
USA
5602 Posts |
Posted - Sep 06 2011 : 9:11:58 PM
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 I used to do henna to my hair, but one day it just started looking really fake and awful, so I quit! Happy as a clam with my red and silver streaked hair now. I really don't want to be one of those gals with pumpkin orange hair and mile thick make up. Sure, I'd love to be a bunch thinner and am working on it, but for me, it came down to learning for the first time in my life to be happy with who I was and not always try to "fix" myself.
I'm on disability and have been battling health issues for the past dozen year, been in a house fire and recovered from burns, broke lots of different bones and been in two auto accidents, I'd say I look pretty darned good in spite of myself!! "I want to age gratefully" really fits me Nancy! Mary Beth, that is hilarious!
Hugs to ya all!
Annika
Farmgirl & sister #13
Simplicity is the ultimate sophistication. ~Leonardo DaVinci
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camiesmommy
True Blue Farmgirl
113 Posts
Anne Jeannette
Stagecoach
NV
USA
113 Posts |
Posted - Sep 06 2011 : 9:47:34 PM
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I must confess, that I dye my hair. I am 55 and have dyed it off and on for several years. I was salt and pepper at 35 and got tired of looking older than my mother who is thirty years older than me. I'm sure I turned grey due mostly to stress, but it just made me look haggared. I have fairly deep laugh lines already, so what does that tell you. Even with that, my skin is better than most my age and I would like to think it's because I take care of it. I told my DH the other night I could never go see Kenny Rogers in person, because he just looks to weird now. Age is a frame of mind and I don't feel 55. I don't act like it either lol.
A.J.
Work is love made visible. ~ Kahlil Gibran |
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Annika
True Blue Farmgirl
5602 Posts
Annika
USA
5602 Posts |
Posted - Sep 06 2011 : 10:43:46 PM
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Anne, it is completely fine to do what ever YOU feel good about doing. I think one of the greatest gifts that we can give ourselves is to be comfortable in our own skins. I think that it's ridiculous that the advertisers and retails are always beating us over the heads with the idea that the older we are the younger we should look. Age really is a frame of mind, I never think of myself as an over 50 year old women, I think my mental clock stopped somewhere in my med 30s, I just turned 51 and I never act my age, just ask my hubby
Annika
Farmgirl & sister #13
Simplicity is the ultimate sophistication. ~Leonardo DaVinci
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batznthebelfry
True Blue Farmgirl
1257 Posts
Michele
Athol
Ma
USA
1257 Posts |
Posted - Sep 07 2011 : 03:53:45 AM
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Hey I may be 52 but mentally I am still a 14 yr old tomboy...lol.....I have dyed my hair since age 22 every color under the rainbow....if you see it you know its not real...thats the whole point for me :).....As an artist I think & feel my personality can get away with some of the funkier hair colors & yes just last year it was neon orange, purple & blue...2 sisters got ahold of it...lol..I am a human canvas for them...my motto is if its cut weird or colored it will eventually grow back....I do get weird looks but I have never cared because its what I want to do so if people get upset its their problem not mine....I don't go for all the surgery, shots ect....I very seldom wear makeup but I like who I am.....I may not be aging gracefully but I am aging fun :)...Michele'
Chickens rule!
The Old Batz Farm
Hen #2622 |
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Fiddlehead Farm
True Blue Farmgirl
4562 Posts
Diane
Waupaca
WI
USA
4562 Posts |
Posted - Sep 07 2011 : 04:08:58 AM
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Self mutilation in the name of vanity, that's what I think about all the cosmetic surgeries. I am 50 and fought the law, but the law won (the law of gravity!) LOL. Some day the Senior Centers and Old Folks Homes will be full of cosmetically enhanced, tatooed and pierced seniors. Should be interesting. As for me and my wrinkles and jowels, they will just give me character.
http://studiodiphotosite.shutterfly.com/
farmgirl sister #922
Don't go with the flow...you are the flow.
I get up every morning determined to both change the world and have one hell of a good time. Sometimes this makes planning my day difficult.
- E. B. White |
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Dorinda
True Blue Farmgirl
1023 Posts
Dorinda
St. Cloud
Florida
USA
1023 Posts |
Posted - Sep 07 2011 : 06:07:41 AM
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That's funny Diane , Although I have no tattoos and only my ears are pierced. But I was just looking in the mirror the other day and thought oh my are those lumps on each side of my chin. It startled me for a few seconds until I fiqured out those were jowels!!!LOL. I wear very little make up and have just started not dying my hair anymore. I feel comfortable in my own skin. I will never have any cosmetic surgery done. I know 2 people who have died fron it! My SIL had breast implants at the age of 45. And I thought WHY!! When they were sewing her back up they poked a hole in one of the breast implants. About 3 weeks later she noticed one breast was getting smaller and smaller each day. She went back to the doctor and the implant had leaked all out. She had to go back through surgery again to replace it and get a clean out. My other SIL was I think about 48 when she had implants put in. I thought it was really weird!!!Love your body as it is. I am 50 yrs.old and love my life!!
Seize The Day!
Dorinda |
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nabrown42
True Blue Farmgirl
409 Posts
Nancy
Caneyville
KY
USA
409 Posts |
Posted - Sep 07 2011 : 08:44:32 AM
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My mother passed away at 94 and continue to have her hair done every week and colored every 6 weeks until the week before she died...never saw her natural hair color after age 20. She used to have a fit because I didn't color my hair but I just couldn't justify the money it cost. Can you imagine how much money she gave the hairdressers for 72 years? My Lord, that would pay for a trip around the world on a luxury steamer! If you can afford it, so be it and it makes you feel happy, do it but for me, it's just an expenditure I don't need.
"I've wept in the night for the shortness of sight that to someone's needs I've been blind; but I've yet to feel a twinge of regret for being a little too kind." |
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Farmer Judy
True Blue Farmgirl
433 Posts
Judy
North Aurora
IL
USA
433 Posts |
Posted - Sep 07 2011 : 09:34:23 AM
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Just live the way that makes you happy. With or without implants, with or without haircolor etc. I keep my hair a shade or two lighter than God made it but it feels right and looks right. I look like I came out of the 70's since I still love blue jeans and tee shirts everyday, and that includes at work. Now at 50 I have aprons, a few dresses and overalls. Whatevery makes your boat float. I have a smile on my face most days so that is what I look at in the mirror, not age, or wrinkles, just my smile.
God bless,
Judy
Born a city girl but a farm girl at heart!
http://farmtimes.blogspot.com/ |
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buffypuff
True Blue Farmgirl
1183 Posts
Claudia
Deer Park
WA
USA
1183 Posts |
Posted - Sep 07 2011 : 10:09:19 AM
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Ladies are so defined, these days, it seems by youth, and what is fashionable in the "big" cities. When I get my hair cut, it is interesting to see the hair styles in the magazines. Some look nice..to my taste.. & others look too severe. I think we should do what we want to do, after we think about why we are doing it. At 66, it is freeing to wear what is nice, clean, but not necessarily "fashion-plate." Who am I out to impress? My husband is the one...& right now I can't think of any other. Just my 2 cents.
Buffypuff/ Claudia ~ Farmgirl Sister #870 @}~~
"God sends no one away empty except those who are full of themselves." DL Moody
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Annika
True Blue Farmgirl
5602 Posts
Annika
USA
5602 Posts |
Posted - Sep 07 2011 : 10:59:01 AM
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Claudia, when I was 14 I went punk-goth rocker and stayed that way through my 30s. I've been battling illnesses since I was 42 and changed to a more henna'd alternative look which I still like to dress in. I used to be so anxious to look cutting edge and be accepted in to the cool alternative crowd. for me, with age came peace and the knowledge that I am ok as I am.
I find it really disturbing how culture and media effect how women treat their bodies. Surgery in the name of beauty is kind of creepy. Just because I don't feel the need to go for lip plumpers, line fillers or other age blurring cosmetics (Wow, that stuff is spendy!) doesn't mean that I would disapprove of any one else who felt that they were right for them. I feel that women are preyed upon by the media and the cosmetic companies, aesthetic surgeons and culture, to fear, hate and do everything available to avoid the dreadful natural process of aging. If this is what a person needs to feel confident and comfortable with them selves, I have no problem with that, but I feel that we (as a society)need to stop hating our selves because we are no longer 20-somethings.
I wear make up, get my nails done for special occasions, wear attractive and fun clothing, big hats, dangley earrings, am thinking of a getting a short and spunky hair style and love long flowing skirts and dresses...but I personally draw the line at Botox and facial re-surfacing ( I'm not a road!) lol!
Annika
Farmgirl & sister #13
Simplicity is the ultimate sophistication. ~Leonardo DaVinci
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acairnsmom
True Blue Farmgirl
1319 Posts
audrey
cheyenne
wy
1319 Posts |
Posted - Sep 07 2011 : 2:27:15 PM
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Here! Here! Let's all age gracefully And gratefully together! I quit coloring my hair about 5 years ago. I was bothered by the grays at first but I got a new cut and LOVE, LOVE them! They are giving my hair the much needed body it lacked. My wrinkles and age spots have all been earned and (I think) give me some character. But I am very thankful I always used moisturizer, my older sister never did and her wrinkles are 10 times worse than mine.
Audrey
Toto, we're not in Kansas any more! |
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buffypuff
True Blue Farmgirl
1183 Posts
Claudia
Deer Park
WA
USA
1183 Posts |
Posted - Sep 07 2011 : 3:03:08 PM
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I agree with you Annika. I think as we get older, most of us find our way to accept the things we cannot change and accept ourselves as who we are. Stylin' for me was in the 60's, since I am mid 60's now. But at that time, Jane Fonda, Petula Clark, & Jackie Kennedy were our models. sooo... that meant fake eyelashes, black eyeliner, bouffant teased hair and sporting a Marlboro between my fingers. BTW, a pack from the vending machine cost 40 cents in those days. As an older person, I have realized that some of the cosmetics, surgery etc are not going to change who I am inside. I'm OK within my skin (even though it has a few age spots, some sag & wrinkles.) Having been a surgical nurse for over 40 years, I saw (and assisted) in many face lifts, lipo-suctions & boob jobs. Again, I say, there is nothing wrong with any of these things in themselves, but it is the reason one is doing it. Does one think they will be a better person, more acceptable? I think those are the wrong reasons....at least for me. And Audrey, I used to go for a haircut & teasingly ask for them to cut out all the gray. I asked my hairdresser awhile ago to do that, & she told me if she did, I'd be bald...so I went with my regular haircut.
Buffypuff/ Claudia ~ Farmgirl Sister #870 @}~~
"God sends no one away empty except those who are full of themselves." DL Moody
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camiesmommy
True Blue Farmgirl
113 Posts
Anne Jeannette
Stagecoach
NV
USA
113 Posts |
Posted - Sep 07 2011 : 5:34:02 PM
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I said earlier that age was a frame of mind. I'm 55 and my mother taught us kids that you always give your seat up to people older than you. So, from the time I was old enough to know better that's what I did. About 2 years ago, I went in to have bloodwork done and someone came in who was older, and as usual I gave up my seat. Then it dawned on me that I was giving up my seat to people either younger or the same age as me. Lol. As for paying to have my hair colored. Well, I taught my DH to color my roots. Costs me $8 every 6-8 weeks. 
A.J.
Work is love made visible. ~ Kahlil Gibran |
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Bonnie Ellis
True Blue Farmgirl
2474 Posts
Bonnie
Minneapolis
Minnesota
USA
2474 Posts |
Posted - Sep 07 2011 : 9:02:18 PM
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Other people have to get over it. Age happens to everyone. Just laugh it off and be glad you are alive. I am grey-haired and 69 and have multiple physical junk. But I can't wait to make my next quilt or see how I can help someone else. "I'm not old, I'm retro!" We have our 50th wedding anniversary coming up and I'm busy planning my 60th. You go girls. Bonnie
grandmother and orphan farmgirl |
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texdane
Farmgirl Legend Chapter Leader Chapter Guru
4658 Posts
Nicole
Sandy Hook
CT
USA
4658 Posts |
Posted - Sep 08 2011 : 05:19:58 AM
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I have a much-older friend who had some major cosmetic work done, had complications, and needed me to take her to her doctor. The pain and everything else she went through, risking her life, could not be worth it! I don't get it. As soon as you are recovered, you are aging again! I'm going to age the way God intended! I am almost forty and know so many people my age already getting face lifts, much less implants, botox, etc. No thank you! My grandma was beautiful until the day she died - she had a curvy, round figure, beautiful skin, and she used rosewater cream, and big sun hats to garden and farm! She didn't let herself "go", but she aged normally.
Nicole
Farmgirl Sister #1155
KNITTER, JAM-MAKER AND MOM EXTRAORDINAIRE
Chapter Leader, Connecticut Simpler Life Sisters
Suburban Farmgirl Blogger
http://sfgblog.maryjanesfarm.org/ |
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buffypuff
True Blue Farmgirl
1183 Posts
Claudia
Deer Park
WA
USA
1183 Posts |
Posted - Sep 08 2011 : 12:25:38 PM
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Bonnie, I am going to adapt the term "retro" for myself if you don't mind. And Nicole, I remember my grandmother using rosewater cream, but I don't know where she got it and if it is still made. anyone know?
Buffypuff/ Claudia ~ Farmgirl Sister #870 @}~~
"God sends no one away empty except those who are full of themselves." DL Moody
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FebruaryViolet
True Blue Farmgirl
4810 Posts
Jonni
Elsmere
Kentucky
USA
4810 Posts |
Posted - Sep 08 2011 : 12:34:33 PM
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I'll admit to owning (and using 2 x's daily) a high powered eye cream, and I wash my face each night and morning, but that's about all I do to stop the aging process. At 38, I'm seeing the effects of way too much sun (hello, freckles!), hormonal changes (thanks pregnancy AND birth control pills!), but I don't think I look too bad. In fact, I'm carded often, and people will say, "no way you're 38--I thought you were my 18 year old daughter's age!" so that's a nice compliment. My mother taught me always to treat my skin well, and it would do the same for me. So, that's what I've been doing. I'm lucky in that I don't have any grey in my hair yet, but neither did my Grandmother or Great Grandmother, though my mom was greying very early. Mine is a rich, deep brown, and I'm not going to do anything to change that, hence I curse myself!
Musings from our family in the Bluegrass http://sweetvioletmae.blogspot.com/ |
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Tea Lady
True Blue Farmgirl
645 Posts
Lorraine
Morris
IL
USA
645 Posts |
Posted - Sep 08 2011 : 4:07:19 PM
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Mostly I don't want to spend the money on getting my hair colored. Also once you start, isn't it hard to stop? I keep my hair shorter, however I can go 6 to 8 weeks between cuts - but if it was colored, I'd look like a skunk lady - you know, with the large white stripe down the middle of the head because I didn't have time to get it touched up. That's not a look I'm going for... I'm pretty comfortable with myself, just the way I am. Recently, I had dinner with some friends I use to work with - and one of them told us she just had her "neck" done... She looked very nice and it made her feel good about herself - so, good for her - but I just can't see having an extensive medical procedure done voluntarily... Thanks, but no thanks.
Lorraine
(aka Tea Lady)
Farmgirl #1819
www.birdsandteas.com |
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Across the Fence: What ever happened to aging gracefully |
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What ever happened to aging gracefully
