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Parenting & Farm Kids:  raising cain.. I mean kids  |
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Whimsy_girl
True Blue Farmgirl
576 Posts
USA
576 Posts |
 Posted - Aug 23 2006 : 2:15:52 PM
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Things have been improving by leaps and bounds lately. I have been keeping us on a set routine along with finally switching my families diet back over to a MUCH more organic lifestyle.. I grew my own fruits and veggies at the last house, and baked my own bread and the only sweets we had were things I made.. when we moved I got into the habit of buying really easy prepackaged food full of additives.
The most suprising thing that has come out of the last week of this change in diet and the last few weeks of a stricter routine, is that she is finally talking! The little thing will be 2 in November and has mostly just said more, milk, ow and pointing and screaming about everything! Yesterday was so amazing! She was able to communicate her needs without shreiking, and saying all kinds of words that I knew she knew the meaning of but wouldn't say.
So things are looking a lot better than they were. Not perfect, but better!
Thanks for all your ideas and support.
Bobbi
you can be oh so smart, or you can be oh so positive. I wasted a lot of time being smart I prefer being positive. |
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Tina Michelle
True Blue Farmgirl
6948 Posts
Tina
sunshine state
FL
USA
6948 Posts |
Posted - Aug 23 2006 : 2:56:04 PM
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aww I am so very glad to hear that things have improved! yay!
~Seize the Day! Live, Love, Laugh~ |
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katiedid
True Blue Farmgirl
601 Posts
Kate
West Jordan
Utah
USA
601 Posts |
Posted - Aug 24 2006 : 08:51:53 AM
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Bobbi, I am so glad to hear this!
I just cannot say enough for good, homemade food. I am not a super freak about food...My SIL won't let her kids have anything cooked, processed, pastuerized, non organic, no meat, no dairy, it is crazy! I refuse to be the food police, BUT I think a good diet with healthy meats, lots of fresh fruits and vegetables, and minimal processed foods and no food dyes is close to a miracle, or at least it was for us. My kids behavior is SOOO much better when we eat well, and like you said, stick to a routine.
And you know, I think kids want to be good. They love positive attention...my girl Julia will just cry and tell me that she doesn't know why she is naughty after she eats red food dye. It really is sad.
I am so glad things are better.
Kate
http://theknifemakerswife.blogspot.com/2006/07/knifemakers-wife.html |
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Lynn B
True Blue Farmgirl
113 Posts
Lynn
Derry
NH
USA
113 Posts |
Posted - Aug 24 2006 : 2:09:20 PM
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Bobbi,
I definitely feel your pain! My youngest, who will be 2 in September, has gone down a very similar road to your little Halsey. He had (and still has) reflux, as well as another stomach condition called delayed gastric emptying. He has/had a milk allergy, though we think he if finally growing out of that. He screams and rages just like you described Halsey doing. In fact today we left Barnes & Noble with the stares of everyone in the store as Ross was screaming at the top of his lungs. (he wasn't happy with me because I told him it was time to go and he had to stop playing with the toys there) And now, to top it all off, his older sister (who is 3) thinks it's really funny to make him scream. Wonderful!
I certainly understand what you mean by feeling like a bad mother, it's hard not to when one so little gets so angry. I have tried everything like you, time outs, spanking, holding close arms down, distracting, EVERYTHING! It's hard to feel like you're not doing something wrong! I recently got a book called, RAISING YOUR SPIRITED CHILD. It seems pretty good, but I haven't gotten very far in it! I say it seems pretty good because it describes Ross quite accurately! I'll let you know if it is worth reading.
Also, Halsey doesn't have to be spitting up in order to still have her reflux flaring up. Since I am REALLY well versed in reflux (both of my kids had it) I am a volunteer for a supportive organization for parents of children with reflux. www.reflux.org I would highly recommend going to the website and checking it out. Lots of great information and support. You are also more than welcome to contact me directly with any questions you may have. (reflux...the screaming/raging I'm just as lost!) It might be a good idea to have her checked out for the reflux, as that may be why she is screaming. There is a very simple test they can do to determine if she still is refluxing.
Hope things continue to get better for you!
Lynn
Blessed are they who can laugh at themselves, for they shall never cease to be amused.
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lilpunkin
True Blue Farmgirl
368 Posts
Texas
USA
368 Posts |
Posted - Oct 03 2006 : 10:43:38 AM
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Bobbi- How is the update on your situation? And then first and foremost I want to say, you are a good mother. It is amazing how society can make us mothers feel like we amount to nothing. But we are something. We are raising the next generation. And yes it is hard. I have two boys. My first boy is easy going, easy to please, that whole bit. And my second one who is still a good boy, is more of a pistol. He needs more attention and requires it for sure. And there have been several times I wanted to pull my hair out. But I have to do what I know is right for my kids and what works for my kids. My oldest I can just look at and he knows he is in trouble. My second one, well, we have done several forms of discipline. The one that works the best for his temperment is time out. He hates to have to sit there. He has to sit until he is quiet, totally quiet. And then when he comes out we talk to him to make him understand why he got in trouble.
But what ever you do, dont feel like you are a bad mother. A bad motther is only one that gives up completely on her kids. And I know at times you may feel like giving up, but you don't and you haven't. So just keep hanging in there and know that you have people that back you and support you. And you know that you can always come vent to us gurlz.
lilpunkin |
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Whimsy_girl
True Blue Farmgirl
576 Posts
USA
576 Posts |
Posted - Oct 03 2006 : 3:00:17 PM
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Overall she has been a lot better! We still have occasional setbacks and tantrums but they have been a lot fewer and farther between. We are out of the apartment which helps too.. I have found that now that I am not afraid of my neighbors hearing, I can send her to her room for acting out and let her cry it out as loud as she wants. Now that She knows that she has to sit there until she can be nice, it's been a huge difference.
you can be oh so smart, or you can be oh so positive. I wasted a lot of time being smart I prefer being positive. |
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katiedid
True Blue Farmgirl
601 Posts
Kate
West Jordan
Utah
USA
601 Posts |
Posted - Oct 04 2006 : 7:51:29 PM
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Bobbi
I am so glad things are going better at your house...I know, it can be so hard and there is nothing worse than feeling like you aren't doing your best as a parent...well YOU are..
Your kids are lucky to have you for a Mama
Kate
my new blog http/www.theknifemakerswife.wordpress.com |
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MustangSuzie
True Blue Farmgirl
634 Posts
Sarah
New London
Missouri
USA
634 Posts |
Posted - Oct 05 2006 : 03:57:22 AM
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I have a couple of strong willed children. Dr. Dobson's book The Strong Willed Child is full of good info.
Sarah |
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Alee
True Blue Farmgirl
22941 Posts
Alee
Worland
Wy
USA
22941 Posts |
Posted - Oct 17 2006 : 08:39:28 AM
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Hi Bobbi-
I am so glad to hear that you have made such wonderful progress. I am sure I drove my mom to distraction when I was a kid. I had food allergies that would cause me to have irrational anger. I was allergic to 26 different foods, from wheat to dairy to citrus. I actually drank a soy formula as my milk until middle school.
One thing my mom did with all four of us if we had a tantrum is- laugh! She would laugh at us and then turn around and walk away. That was definatly _not_ the response we were looking for and since she then would walk away were never got that idea that it would be "fun" to do.
I also remember having a very structured childhood. We always had a very set bedtime and mealtimes.
It sounds like you are having much more sucess! I am so glad for you! I am really interested in what other parents are going through since I will have my first in April. keep us posted! |
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Whimsy_girl
True Blue Farmgirl
576 Posts
USA
576 Posts |
Posted - Oct 17 2006 : 12:28:26 PM
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congratulations on your upcoming new addition! Yeah things are still going well, much better now that we don't have neighbors attatched to us, and now that I am worried about it if she screams, she has of course started doing it a lot less... I tried not to care in the apartment but it was so hard when people were on all sides of you.
Things are going really well here, if I look out my back window of the trailor we are renting now, I can see our new house being built down the road... It's a toupe color with blue trim. Very pretty! We will have 4 bedrooms and two bathrooms... we opted for all smaller bed/bath rooms and huge living areas. We will have a semi formal dining room off the kitchen, a sitting room and off of that will be a large additional living/play/rec/entertainment room. We figured with as cold as winters get here, it would be smart to have a large area where toddlers can run around and be spastic. Right now we have the exterior all up and ready except the rain gutters, and through the next couple of cold months the guys will be turning the inside into an actual house instead of a bunch of stud walls and bare wires.... I guess I am posting all this in the wrong place, but I just got on a roll because it's so exciting... I have a couple of pics of the exterior I'll download and post somewhere more appropriate whenever I run across the firewire.
you can be oh so smart, or you can be oh so positive. I wasted a lot of time being smart I prefer being positive. |
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katiedid
True Blue Farmgirl
601 Posts
Kate
West Jordan
Utah
USA
601 Posts |
Posted - Oct 17 2006 : 3:50:33 PM
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Bobbi~
I am so glad things are better....I know exactly what you mean about parenting under a microscope...sometimes I have had to just let my kids scream...having nosey neighbors makes it so tough...
Your house sounds so perfect..and exactly what I want in a dream house! I need more bedrooms we have 3 and now that we have 4 kids it would be nice to let the older ones have their own space but the bigger living areas are what I want! Sometimes I feel like we are just so crowed! Especially in the winter.
I can't wait to hear more and see photos of the house in progress.
Kate
my new blog http/www.theknifemakerswife.wordpress.com |
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Parenting & Farm Kids: raising cain.. I mean kids |
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raising cain.. I mean kids
