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 Homeschooling, frustrated...question!!!
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farmmilkmama
True Blue Farmgirl

2027 Posts

Amy
Central MN
USA
2027 Posts

Posted - Apr 24 2010 :  4:34:59 PM  Show Profile
Hey there - I'm wondering if any of the homeschooling mamas want to email me offlist about some issues I'm having with the kids and homeschooling. I'm so fed up right now with being the one harping on them to do their schoolwork and their school attitudes from 9-noon...and then putting on another hat and harping on them about chores, fighting, attitudes, etc etc from noon until bedtime. I know wearing both hats comes with the territory and I just need to figure out how to balance both, but the last couple months I've been feeling so frustrated and wanting to just be done. So I think I need a realistic pep talk from someone who has been through the yucky parts and lived to tell. You can either post here, or feel free to email me offlist. I need some creative ideas how to not pull my hair out when I'm dealing with crappy attitudes first as teacher, then as mom. Thanks in advance from both my husband and I. :)

--* FarmMilkMama *--

Farmgirl Sister #1086

Be yourself.
Everyone else is already taken.
-Oscar Wilde

www.wakeupstartlearning.blogspot.com
www.farmfoodmama.blogspot.com

levisgrammy
True Blue Farmgirl

9324 Posts

Denise
Beavercreek Ohio
USA
9324 Posts

Posted - Apr 24 2010 :  6:41:04 PM  Show Profile
How old are your kids, Amy?

"All you need is faith, trust and......a liitle bit of pixie dust" ~Peter Pan
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farmmilkmama
True Blue Farmgirl

2027 Posts

Amy
Central MN
USA
2027 Posts

Posted - Apr 24 2010 :  6:49:31 PM  Show Profile
6 and 7, both just turned. They are a little over 12 months apart.

--* FarmMilkMama *--

Farmgirl Sister #1086

Be yourself.
Everyone else is already taken.
-Oscar Wilde

www.wakeupstartlearning.blogspot.com
www.farmfoodmama.blogspot.com
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emsmommy5
True Blue Farmgirl

1547 Posts

Angie
Buckley WA
USA
1547 Posts

Posted - Apr 25 2010 :  1:02:19 PM  Show Profile
Having survived 5 homeschooled kiddos.... last one is 17. All I can say is to remember that on those rough days when things are not going right... sometimes it is OK to put the studies down and do something fun. If you are not having fun, they aren't having fun. If things are stressed, what are they learning anyway? Keeping in mind, I have always been more of an unschooling mom and even with that method, I feel my kids have turned out pretty awesome!

I could go on and on and on. You are welcome to email and vent and ask questions! I am always overflowing with advice. LOL

Do what you love, love what you do.
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maggie14
True Blue Farmgirl

6784 Posts

Hannah
Washington
USA
6784 Posts

Posted - Apr 25 2010 :  2:23:23 PM  Show Profile  Send maggie14 a Yahoo! Message
Sending Hugs to you Amy!! I don't know how my mom did it but she is and was homeschooling all 4 of us kids. My brothers are 18 and 19 and are almost done with school and right now my mom is finishing homeschooling me and my sister ( ages 15 and almost 14). Anyway, sending you tons of hugs!
Hugs,
Channah

Farmgirl sister #1219


Just a small town country girl trying to live her dreams. :)
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kristin sherrill
True Blue Farmgirl

11303 Posts

kristin
chickamauga ga
USA
11303 Posts

Posted - Apr 25 2010 :  8:44:33 PM  Show Profile
Amy, have you tried just doing school throughout the day? Like incorporate "home" stuff in the schooling time? Maybe I'm thinking of more like unschooling. Not the sit down kind of school work but more hands on throughout the day type schooling. Sometimes that works better than the sit down book work. Maybe do that a few days a week, like the major booklearning and tests. And more unschool the rest of the time. I don't know if that makes sense or not. And there's only about another month then summer! I know what you mean though. It sure can get frustrating. Can your hubby take a day? And give you a time out? When I homeschooled we had a field trip day. And a music day. And art day. Or maybe do things backwards.

I will be praying for you.

Kris

Happiness is simple.
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Melbick
True Blue Farmgirl

81 Posts

Melanie
Venus TX
USA
81 Posts

Posted - Apr 25 2010 :  9:19:57 PM  Show Profile  Send Melbick a Yahoo! Message
Kris, that is how we do it.
Amy, we started out like you trying to dedicate a specific time for school, and then for work. We have found that if we break it up during the day it works better. After we finish one subject or project we take a break and do some chores. Usually by this time they are needed to get up and move around and rest their brains. I have also found that if i incorperate the lessons into the shores it is funner for the kids. Feel free to shoot me an email anytime you want to discuss anything. I am a pretty good listener:)

Melanie Bickham
Homegrown Girls
http://thebickhamfamily.blogspot.com/
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QueenofQuiteAlot
True Blue Farmgirl

865 Posts

Dalyn
Milk 'n Honey Ranch Central, WA
USA
865 Posts

Posted - Apr 26 2010 :  1:02:11 PM  Show Profile
Same here. I have 4 and have been homeschooling 10 years. Sometimes mom needs to be fun! Change the dily plan, let there be rewards, games, and get outside! Sometimes we get too serious and life isn't fun anymore...I am SO guilty of that. This year two of my teens will be done homeschooling and we have survived! yeah! But not without some hard-won lessons. Relationships are vital. Find a way to get refreshed, and refocused and then learn to operate differently. Be an encourager instead of the police. Be part of the fun, go on adventures. Make a blance between work and play or one day when they are teens they WILL rebel. Learned the hard way, and thanking the Lord for His intervention...mostly with me and my attitude. Mom sets the tone, no matter how unfair that statement is, it's true.

Dalyn

~Hick Chicks Soap Barn ~
www.hickchickssoapbarn.com


Homespun Raw Goat Milk Soaps 'n More


http://muckbootsnaprons.blogspot.com/
http://proverbs31nubians.blogspot.com/

Central Washington Farmgirls Chapter
http://cwfarmgirls.blogspot.com/
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farmmilkmama
True Blue Farmgirl

2027 Posts

Amy
Central MN
USA
2027 Posts

Posted - Apr 26 2010 :  7:48:43 PM  Show Profile
Thanks for all the suggestions. :) And also to those of you who emailed me outside of the forum.

When I say that we have school from 9-12, I do not mean sit down school. I am SO not a sit down school, worksheets and read from a text for three hours kind of mom (although I don't think those things should be completely abandoned either). Our "time frame" for school, however, was enacted for a couple of different reasons. First, out of respect to my parents (who we share a house with) I thought it was a good idea that the boys be officially "out of their hair" for a certain time period of the day. A time my parents could count on to get things done (whatever they need to do) without two little boys to jump over. Suggesting that politely to the boys never really worked. So I made a "time frame" that they were to be up, dressed and ready to rock with whatever it was we had planned for the day. That may mean we go outside and do archery. That may mean that we are at the library. That may mean that we are building a teepee in the woods. But its time they know they are with me.

As far as "unschooling", there are so many definitions to that, so I'm not sure what ones everyone here is using. If by unschooling you mean not necessarily following a scope and sequence for what others think you should learn at a certain time, or finding learning more in what the boys are interested in than what the state says they should be learning at this age...or that school is rarely ever sitting in a desk but more opening the world to them, then that's what we are doing. But I have to say that I get really tired of observing them, picking up on what they are interested in (say archery or swordfighting or Thomas Edison or constellations) and strewing or planning tons of different FUN ACTIVE HANDS ON things having to do with that....and then have the boys cop an attitude and lay on the floor and say "You know, Mom...I'm just dont wanna do that..." and think they are just going to stay in their jammies all day? Give me a break. I get freedom and I get flexibility. I get choices. I get making it fun. There wouldn't be much point to having them home if it weren't, obviously. But I don't get the giving the freedom and the flexibility and choices and fun and then having it met with total attitude. I do have expectations of the boys obviously, but I think we have a pretty flexible lifestyle and we make it fun. I'm pretty creative. I guess my issue is more about total attitude from the boys and mistakeningly believing at this point they would be a little more self sufficient in entertaining themselves...and way more respectful than they are...and not seeing that, plus being with them 24-7 because of homeschooling just multiplies my frustration by a million.

I know its time for a change again...we're always tossin' up what we do and how we run things. Its just hard for me to dive into anything fun and exciting when I feel like I get attitude in return. And we have talked about that at length...attitude and being crabby at each other all the time is no way to be - homeschooling or not. I guess I'm bummed about feeling like its my job to assist in their learning...but its not necessarily my job to entertain them. And that I want them to be able to have freedom and explore and learn what they want, but I also want them to be respectful and learn there are times you just have to do things that you don't necessarily want to do. And I'm having a REALLY hard time finding the middle ground in all of those - dealing with attitude the whole way.

Ok, enough rambling. Sorry for the length. I'll shutup and listen now. :)

--* FarmMilkMama *--

Farmgirl Sister #1086

Be yourself.
Everyone else is already taken.
-Oscar Wilde

www.wakeupstartlearning.blogspot.com
www.farmfoodmama.blogspot.com
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Melbick
True Blue Farmgirl

81 Posts

Melanie
Venus TX
USA
81 Posts

Posted - Apr 26 2010 :  8:06:37 PM  Show Profile  Send Melbick a Yahoo! Message
Amy,

i get your frustration. I returned to school this year and it has been real hard on us. it seems like i am constantly on the kids about doing thier work, both school and chores, and about letting me study. any time you need someone to rant and rave at just shoot me an email. I am a good listener.

Melanie Bickham
Homegrown Girls
http://thebickhamfamily.blogspot.com/
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