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Keeping in Touch:  Becoming Me  |
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deeredawn
True Blue Farmgirl
2306 Posts
Dawn
Cordova
TN
USA
2306 Posts |
 Posted - Oct 21 2009 : 12:53:53 PM
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As I write this I'm taken back to a little over a year ago when I first found out about MJF. I had no clue that there were so many others out there like me who needed this place. I had just come through my mothers death and a marital incident that left me devastated to say the least. Not know which way to turn in my life I chose bad things. Bad food. Bad friends. Then I found this site. Quiet, comforting and home-y. I decided to chose a life that I had not led since I was a young girl growing up on my Grandfathers dairy farm outside of Medina, Ohio. I chose, climbing trees, and learning to embroider, heart to heart convo's with my neighborly farmgirls. Everyday I came here to heal. To grow. To live again.
I took on the task of being the Queen Maven of MJ's Heirloom Mavens and learned about life changes. I think that the education I learned about heirlooms paralled what I was searching for in my life of chaos. I needed a seed, with no chemical obstacles. I need for that seed to take root and grow ferociously. I needed that root to change and shape into sustenance. I needed to feed on that sustenance. I made a decision to change my life when I came here and I darn well did it.
Everyday I'd learn more about who I wanted to be from the ones I surrounded myself with. Rural Farm Girl, Contrary Wife, FarmallChick, Marcy Jo, CatsCharm, and soooooo many others that probably don't realize it, helped me to re-shape my life.
I know that I'm no where near the person I want to be, but I can also see that I'm a long way off from the person I used to be and I like this new gal a lot better!
Sometimes when I get down I ask myself, what would make it a farmgirl day? What is ONE thing that I can do for myself today to make ME happy? If this sounds selfish, than I'm selfish. But for so long I've given and given and people and taken and taken. I learned the hard way that before everyone gets happy, I gotta make ME happy. MJ & crew makes me happy. So, back to that one thing. Is it a dusty ramble down a back road? Or maybe a visit to a local thrift store. Sometimes it was giving in itself being Mittens, food or my time. Everyday for the past year I've done ONE thing per day to change my life and now I can honestly say, I'm......happy. I'm content. I'm sure of who I am and strong at heart.
Sometimes I get one here and read posts by gals that are having a pretty darn tough time of it all and I think "you will persevere." You will come thru this so much stronger and good at heart. You will overcome this sadness, dispair, frustration or tiredness. You will. And you will become you. You will, become a MaryJane Farmgirl.
Dawn #279
MJ's Heirloom Mavens-QMD
http://www.harvestthymefarm.vpweb.com
~I'd rather be on my farm than Emperor of the World~George Washington |
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Alee
True Blue Farmgirl
22941 Posts
Alee
Worland
Wy
USA
22941 Posts |
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Ga Girl
True Blue Farmgirl
2355 Posts
Karen
Meansville
Ga.
USA
2355 Posts |
Posted - Oct 21 2009 : 2:31:41 PM
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Oh Dawn, I so agree that if you cant find your happy place here then it will be hard finding it. Mjs is one of my fav happy places! Being a farmgirl has made many happy moments in my life and sharing them with farmgirl sisters is even better. I'm so you are doing better! Blessings,Karen
Create in me a pure heart,O God and renew a steadfast spirit within me. Psalms 51:10
www.KKJD1.etsy.com
http://farmgirlingastyle.blogspot.com/ |
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dutchy
True Blue Farmgirl
4427 Posts
4427 Posts |
Posted - Oct 21 2009 : 2:41:30 PM
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I might not be a real farmgirl because I don't live on a farm. BUT am a farmgirl at heart, so... And I love this post. It reminds me to be happy for what I became in the past 3 years since mom passed and I have moved out on my own for the frst time in my life.
It is hard and often I am still so sad and mad etc. But getting through one step at a time. Often I feel I put one step forward and 3 back, but then it is one forward again.
Hugs from Marian/Dutchy, a farmgirl from the Netherlands :)
My personal blog:
http://just-me-a-dutch-girl.blogspot.com/
Almost daily updates on me and mine :)
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ceejay48
Farmgirl Legend/Schoolmarm/Sharpshooter
13664 Posts
CeeJay (CJ)
Dolores
Colorado
USA
13664 Posts |
Posted - Oct 21 2009 : 3:26:35 PM
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Thanks Dawn for your candidness and for your encouragement!! I don't know how old you are and wouldn't have a clue what to guess but I know how old I am and how much this Farmgirl Connection has meant to me. As Alee said it is a place of kindred spirit . . . like none other I've know. I was born and raised on a farm and we learned more than we were able to appreciate until becoming an adult.
My husband and I live now on what was part of that farm, my dad deeding us the acreage to build our house. My roots GO DEEPER THAN DEEP!!!! I can look out my windows and remember all those things that I learned growing up and being part of my family . . . and the things that REALLY matter to me now. I continue to heal from all the bangs and bruises of life . . . and the downright tragedies that rip to the very soul of our being.
I have received SO-O-O-O-O-O much encouragement from the Farmgirls here . . . I cannot express what it means. "Ga Girl" is one of those who . . . well, "Ga Girl" I just wish I could reach all the way from Colorado to Georgia and hug you!!!
Thanks to all of you for helping us make the connections and grow!!!
GOD BLESS YOU ALL!!!
CJ
CJ
...from the barefoot farmgirl in SW Colorado...sister chick #665 |
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jinia
True Blue Farmgirl
152 Posts
jinia
mo
USA
152 Posts |
Posted - Oct 21 2009 : 3:42:45 PM
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| Wow ... deeredawn that was a beautiful post! I'm so glad your finding your way. |
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Laura Marie
True Blue Farmgirl
419 Posts
Laura
Rancho Cordova
California
USA
419 Posts |
Posted - Oct 21 2009 : 4:57:44 PM
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Dawn, I thank you for that post. I am currently going through similary situation. I have been with the MJ Farm for over a year and the ideals and the way of life is what has pushed me into making my life more of what I want. I ended my engagement because he didn't want what I wanted, and he would laugh me off. Making me feel like I was just some silly girl dreaming of a fantasy land. But I knew deep down it wasn't that and that he wasn't the person for me. I am now on the journey of discovering who I am and where I belong. I know I don't belong in LA and even southern Cali right now. I want to go north. I want to find people who share the same beliefs and ideals and life style that I so long for. This city life is not for this country girl. Dawn thanks for being that beaking of light for me to know that I am on the right track. I know it won't be easy but the hardest part is already over.
Farm Girl Hugs!
Laura Marie #369
www.lauramariedesign.com
"It's not the size of the farm but the size of your heart!"
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deeredawn
True Blue Farmgirl
2306 Posts
Dawn
Cordova
TN
USA
2306 Posts |
Posted - Oct 21 2009 : 8:50:03 PM
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Being a farm girl is not only about living on a farm. Its about being true to yourself, your family and your environment. Its about faith and love for our country. My journey does not end here, it is just beginning. But lately I've been really appreciative for the hand I've been dealt. I know that there has been hardship, and heartbreak. I've had loss and bad luck, bad timing. I let those things work me into a frenetic lather that I didn't like. I remember asking God to let me die in my sleep so I didn't have to wake up and face another day. But He didn't. I believe in signs. I was searching for my past. The one that shaped the real me deep inside. I was a customer service rep and my customer on the phone and I struck up a convo about this subject and she asked if I'd ever heard of MJF. She told me it would "soothe my soul". Immediately after hanging up the phone I googled this site and never looked back. I'm not saying Miss MaryJane herself is a Saint, but I do like her style. She is gracious and giving. She shares with all of us tidbits on what a good life is. All I did was take her lead.
I had the chance to visit her farm this past summer. MJ shares her farm, her home, her business with whomever pops in. She gives and gives. I want to be that kind of person and although I don't have the wall tents and a magazine to share, I have my insight (of all 38 years). I have shared my home to strange farmgirls who aren't strangers anymore. I have shared food and clothing. I'm sharing now.
I dont know what is possessing me to be so introspect. I just feel the need to.....share. I mean, if I can come out of whatever funk I was in, then someone else can to, right? Or am I just spouting? I'm not saying that this is a cure all for everyone, but if you take a piece of this and that and sew them together to fit your life.....then it works, right?
I don't know. All I know is that I'm happy. I'm in love with my husband. I'm blessed with friends and new chickens and fall foliage. My heart is light and I want to share it with you all.....
Dawn #279
MJ's Heirloom Mavens-QMD
http://www.harvestthymefarm.vpweb.com
~I'd rather be on my farm than Emperor of the World~George Washington |
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dutchy
True Blue Farmgirl
4427 Posts
4427 Posts |
Posted - Oct 21 2009 : 11:34:21 PM
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Hugs to you and all Farmgirls from this Dutchy.
Hugs from Marian/Dutchy, a farmgirl from the Netherlands :)
My personal blog:
http://just-me-a-dutch-girl.blogspot.com/
Almost daily updates on me and mine :)
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Ga Girl
True Blue Farmgirl
2355 Posts
Karen
Meansville
Ga.
USA
2355 Posts |
Posted - Oct 22 2009 : 05:33:31 AM
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Dawn, again thanks for sharing your heart. Each post you post is so me, I know we are farmgirl sisters for sure! CJ thank you for your sweet words! Your the best! Dutchy, hugs back at ya ! Blessings,Karen
Create in me a pure heart,O God and renew a steadfast spirit within me. Psalms 51:10
www.KKJD1.etsy.com
http://farmgirlingastyle.blogspot.com/ |
Edited by - Ga Girl on Oct 22 2009 05:34:17 AM |
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jpbluesky
True Blue Farmgirl
6066 Posts
Jeannie
Florida
USA
6066 Posts |
Posted - Oct 22 2009 : 09:57:30 AM
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Dawn, This is a wonderful thread, and I know there are many of us who can totally relate. I am one. Kindred spirits here, for sure, and very loving and nurturing things happen when we sincerely share our feelings and thoughts and talents. Thanks for posting on this topic!
Karen, we have the same little byline - Psalm 51:10 is my favorite verse in the Bible.
Farmgirl Sister # 31
www.blueskyjeannie.blogspot.com
Psalm 51: 10-13 |
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marcy jo
True Blue Farmgirl
453 Posts
Marcy
Wawaka
Indiana
USA
453 Posts |
Posted - Oct 22 2009 : 1:22:34 PM
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Me too Dawn Me too!!! I was searching for well, farmgirls, and didnt know it til I found 'em. It grounds you and grows you at the same time. For the longest time I thought I was the only one like me and then I realized how many of us there really are!
Marcy #257
http://marcysmarket.blogspot.com |
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catscharm74
True Blue Farmgirl
4687 Posts
Heather
Texas
USA
4687 Posts |
Posted - Oct 22 2009 : 1:43:33 PM
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"I needed a seed, with no chemical obstacles." WOW!! That says it all for me!! (((HUGS))) and thanks for being so honest and open. MJ's rocks!!! YEE HAW!!!
I can say for sure without the support of MJ and all the wonderful farmgirls, I probably would have fallen through the cracks years ago. I first used it as the forums as my crutch, my shoulder to lean on and cry. Now, I feel the love and empowerment everyone had given to me. I can go forward with great positive energy and spread the love!!! : )
Heather
"Hitch your wagon to a star"
http://somewheredownintexas-heather.blogspot.com |
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Claude09647
True Blue Farmgirl
761 Posts
Claudia
Our Dairy Farm
Pennsylvania
USA
761 Posts |
Posted - Oct 22 2009 : 4:26:50 PM
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I agree, this can be a sort of "Happy Place" to come when things just aren't going your way. It almost like a good chat with a grandma, mother, or good friend.
"My ideal day is sitting on the back porch, cup of green tea in hand, slippers on, and just watch the cows in the pasture"
http://claude09647.blogspot.com/ |
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homemom
True Blue Farmgirl
1593 Posts
Ruth
Warwick
RI
USA
1593 Posts |
Posted - Oct 23 2009 : 07:06:02 AM
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Dawn~What an awesome post. Thank you for sharing your heart openly with us hear. I know that we need to be reminded of these things on a daily basis. We need to be true to ourselves and follow our hearts. You have been a great source of inspiration to me, too. Lately things here have seemed so down and at times life has been out of control. The day to day has been so hard to face. I haven't been on the forum or checked in with my friends for some time. I miss you all and know that you are never far from my heart.
Ruth
Living the farm life in my heart.
http://www.homeschoolblogger.com/Ruth
http://farmgirlinmyheart.blogspot.com |
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ruralfarmgirl
True Blue Farmgirl
4309 Posts
Rene'
Prosser
WA
USA
4309 Posts |
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Julia
True Blue Farmgirl
1949 Posts
Julia
Shelton
WA
USA
1949 Posts |
Posted - Oct 23 2009 : 10:25:05 PM
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Amen Sister! I think you have said well how so many of us feel. I know that while my husband was dying of cancer, I would take sips of the forum, long enough to find something to cheer me. I never really posted anything during that time, I just needed the constant in my life, something cozy and familiar to help get me through another hour, another day. I like what Alee said, 'fellowship', and 'like-mindedness'. It is so true. Here our hearts are the same, even if it is across many miles.
For tomorrow and its needs I do not pray, but keep me, guide me, love me, Lord just for today.
St. Augustine
#440
http://www.myfeetaredirty.blogspot.com/ |
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Diane B Carter
True Blue Farmgirl
1270 Posts
Diane
Blasdell
N.Y.
USA
1270 Posts |
Posted - Oct 25 2009 : 12:32:03 PM
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Inspiring, true, nice, a joy to read, this place has been a blessing for almost all of us and you put it in words eloquently!
Hope all your days are Sunnydays.
dianebcarterhotmailcom.blogspot.com |
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Bonnie Ellis
True Blue Farmgirl
2474 Posts
Bonnie
Minneapolis
Minnesota
USA
2474 Posts |
Posted - Oct 26 2009 : 2:41:21 PM
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Dawn: You are journeying through life beautifully. And you are right, we all need to share. Many of us feel the same and thank you for saying this in such a soulful way.
Bonnie
grandmother and orphan farmgirl |
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herblady55
True Blue Farmgirl
3470 Posts
Judy
Louisville
Ohio(Stark Co)
USA
3470 Posts |
Posted - Nov 02 2009 : 5:41:48 PM
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WOW! All of you are an inspiration to me. I have taken a nibble from each of your plates and "My Cup Runneth Over!" May GOD Bless All you Gals!
Judy
Hugs&Squeezles!
I am not contained between my hat and my boots! -Walt Whitman- |
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Tammyb
True Blue Farmgirl
511 Posts
Tammy
Bluffton
Ohio
USA
511 Posts |
Posted - Nov 10 2009 : 04:53:41 AM
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Dawn, your words have been an encouragement. You Go Girl !!
Sisterchick #541
Tammyb
Live to leave a legacy
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corabela
True Blue Farmgirl
79 Posts
Laura
Mount Vernon
Ohio
USA
79 Posts |
Posted - Nov 12 2009 : 07:02:17 AM
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What a beautiful person you are, Dawn. I've been reading some other posts of yours here and there, since I found this site and your narratives are just so moving and inspiring. I'm familiar with adversity, as so many of us are, and it wasn't until I learn to let go of who I'd become, that I found out what I really wanted and who I wanted to be. It's been a long process of changing...I guess my entire life thus far. But it just keeps getting better and better.
When I found MJ's magazine, I found the website. I found a little article about Mary Jane's mother Helen, written after she passed away. I was in transition. Trying to find my way. And I remember sitting on the couch with my laptop, reading that article online as my husband was sitting next to me watching tv, and having my TRUE desire in life suddenly hit me like a ton of bricks. Mary Jane was remembering her mother...describing her sweet, thoughtful personality; her industriousness; her inborn gratitude. And I was moved to tears. I thought "I'm not like Helen at all. I'm whiny, I complain, I'm selfish, and I feel like I never have "enough". I don't want to be like that anymore. When I'm gone, I want to be remembered the way Helen is."
And like you, every day, I do something to transform myself into the woman I want to be remembered as. It might sound morbid but it's certainly not meant that way. It's just that the sharp realization and change of perspective came from that thought. And it helps me remember what's important.
You're right about this place. It's full of healing energy, for those who want it. : )
~Laura
Please stop by my blog and my etsy site and say hello : )
www.corabela.blogspot.com
www.corabela.etsy.com |
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deeredawn
True Blue Farmgirl
2306 Posts
Dawn
Cordova
TN
USA
2306 Posts |
Posted - Nov 16 2009 : 3:35:31 PM
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Lora, we are pretty close in proximity. I have family in Utica and Homer. Maybe we can meet up at Sips someday and get to know one another! I can't think of a better way to spend a day than with a fellow farmgirl!
Dawn #279
MJ's Heirloom Mavens-QMD
http://www.harvestthymefarm.vpweb.com
~I'd rather be on my farm than Emperor of the World~George Washington |
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Keeping in Touch: Becoming Me |
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Becoming Me
