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Across the Fence:  Dontcha love folks who are NEVER wrong?  |
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FebruaryViolet
True Blue Farmgirl
4810 Posts
Jonni
Elsmere
Kentucky
USA
4810 Posts |
 Posted - Jun 17 2009 : 11:38:17 AM
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I have such difficulty with a co-worker, a very young (emotionally) 20 something who spends time perusing the internet, but pawns off work to our runners because she's "too busy" and makes frequent mistakes, but somehow, never apologizes, says "oops" or anything...she actually has a VERY annoying way of making it out to be YOUR fault. Additionally, she misses work at least once or twice a month on Monday (we've figured out that's when her fiance is off). But, when you advise her of her mistakes or ask her to change something, no matter what way you approach her (nicely, meanly, upside down, patting your head, whatever), she gives you the cold shoulder for the rest of day, stomping around like a draft horse in her heels, pouting. She REALLY gets my hackles raised.
What is it with this younger generation and work ethic and accountability?
Musings from our family in the Bluegrass http://sweetvioletmae.blogspot.com/ |
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Amie C.
True Blue Farmgirl
2099 Posts
Finger Lakes Region
NY
2099 Posts |
Posted - Jun 17 2009 : 11:52:33 AM
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I don't know...that description matches my 70-something mil pretty well.
I think it has more to do with work/life experience or lack thereof than it does strictly with age. |
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catscharm74
True Blue Farmgirl
4687 Posts
Heather
Texas
USA
4687 Posts |
Posted - Jun 17 2009 : 12:09:03 PM
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When I took over as supervisor for a 30 something person office in the military, there was one gal, a rank lower than me, who fits your description well...worthless to say the least. I was TOLD that people just leave her alone and she gets away with it. I am not that way,,,everyone pulls their weight in my office...so I went over with a pile of papers about 18 inches high and told her I need them sorted via the code on the top and I wanted them back to me by noon. You would have thought I had shot her dog or something or that I was speaking a foreign language. She huffed and then called me a B***H!!! and this is the military folks...she was disciplined but it still never sunk in with her but as her supervisor and to be fair to others, I kept at her. She did eventually break down after I refused to hear anymore of her excuses and lame reasons for not being somewhere or doing something. I disciplined her about 3-4 times a month. The uppers finally caught on, busted her down a rank and then she transferred. I don't know if she every got it but I am hoping she did. Some people just don't. What I do not understand is why people are afraid of people like that. It would have cost me MY job is she sat there, so darn skippy I am gonna be on her behind. I can only be thankful for the other 29 good for the most part people I worked with, who were trained not to give into her BS anymore once I got there. She even tried to bring me up on harassment charges...but everything was within the "military" standards and her given rank. Unbelievable!!! Plus, I had 4 Officers back me up. : )
Heather
Yee-Haw, I am a cowgirl!!!
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Amie C.
True Blue Farmgirl
2099 Posts
Finger Lakes Region
NY
2099 Posts |
Posted - Jun 17 2009 : 1:12:20 PM
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| We had an attorney who was a bit like that, Heather. I thought everybody bent over backwards for her because she was really good at her job and well-respected. She left the job about 6 months after I started, and then I started to hear how everyone was afraid of her and how she manipulated other people just to revel in her own power. We had to go back and fix a whole bunch of new innovations she'd come up with in our products. They didn't match the rest of the company's standards, she'd just wanted to do her work that way and our superiors let her. |
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Bear5
True Blue Farmgirl
13055 Posts
Louisiana/Texas
USA
13055 Posts |
Posted - Jun 17 2009 : 3:12:18 PM
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JONNI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I'm telling you, I could have wrote that post. I see the same thing as you. I call them the "ME ME" generation. I am getting a good laugh here. Not at you, please know that. But, at the fact, that someone else thinks like me, and that I am not a nut for thinking that. LOL
Marly
"It's only when we truly know and understand that we have a limited time on earth- and that we have no way of knowing when our time is up- that we will begin to live each day to the fullest, as if it was the only one we had." Elisabeth Kurler-Ross |
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kissmekate
True Blue Farmgirl
890 Posts
Kate
Delano
Minnesota
890 Posts |
Posted - Jun 17 2009 : 4:13:42 PM
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Speaking as a Mother of a couple of the ME-ME kids, I could rant forever.
Despite taking great pains to NOT allow my kids to be that way, it rubs off from their little bratty friends.
My son is worse than my daughter. He thinks he should sit around all day in his underwear and I should wait on him hand and foot, and hand over my bank card..
This new generation appears to be very self centered and have NO work ethic.
My next door neighbor and I were just talking about this the other night. He is having the same kind of issues with his 20 something step sons.
Don't miss out on a blessing, just because it isn't packaged the way you expected. ~MaryJo Copeland |
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Prairie Princess
True Blue Farmgirl
1075 Posts
Jodi
Washington
USA
1075 Posts |
Posted - Jun 17 2009 : 5:45:06 PM
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20 and begging y'all to notice the older generations who exhibit the same traits... and to not dismiss those of us in the younger classification who aren't "ME ME"... isn't an age or generation issue... 'tis individual...
~Jodi
"Women are like teabags...you never know how strong they are until they get into hot water." Eleanor Roosevelt
www.jodielyzabeth.blogspot.com |
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Prairie Princess
True Blue Farmgirl
1075 Posts
Jodi
Washington
USA
1075 Posts |
Posted - Jun 17 2009 : 5:46:49 PM
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So I echo Amie, basically, lol.
~Jodi
"Women are like teabags...you never know how strong they are until they get into hot water." Eleanor Roosevelt
www.jodielyzabeth.blogspot.com |
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CherryMeDarlin
True Blue Farmgirl
602 Posts
Cherry
Odenville
AL
USA
602 Posts |
Posted - Jun 17 2009 : 6:48:09 PM
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Jonni, wait until little Violet is older and you have to deal with the parents who are never wrong! That'll test your mettle!
~~Cherry~~
http://cherrymedarlin.blogspot.com
"A thing is as simple or as complicated as you make it." --TT Murphy |
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kissmekate
True Blue Farmgirl
890 Posts
Kate
Delano
Minnesota
890 Posts |
Posted - Jun 17 2009 : 8:15:39 PM
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Yes, Cherry is right!!! I have met a lot of parents that can't believe their precious baby does anything wrong.
My kids will admit when they screw up,and then they're punished accordingly.
Don't miss out on a blessing, just because it isn't packaged the way you expected. ~MaryJo Copeland |
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Annab
True Blue Farmgirl
2900 Posts
Anna
Seagrove
NC
USA
2900 Posts |
Posted - Jun 18 2009 : 05:18:41 AM
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I think these types of folks lack a bit of humility too.....Looks like its across the board regardless of age.
I would like to be proven wrong sometimes. That's how we learn!
We worked with a near 60-someting induvidual who also pouted when he didn't get his way. He was way mental to begin with.
When our section got a new boss, the gloves came off, and he started playing hardball. The "baby" couldn't handle it and began lashing out at everyone and doing the bear minimum. It's worse when someone is passive aggeessive too!
After nearly 20 years of this, he finally handed in his regisnation.
And peace raineth once again |
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CherryMeDarlin
True Blue Farmgirl
602 Posts
Cherry
Odenville
AL
USA
602 Posts |
Posted - Jun 18 2009 : 05:37:41 AM
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Mine, too, Kate. She learned a long time ago (she's 17 now) that if she told on herself, she might get into trouble, but not near the trouble she'd get into if she lies and we find out about it later. The down side to this is that I sometimes would just rather not know what she's been up to! LOL!! And usually the parents who ridicule our style of parenting, trying to tell us how to do it, are the parents with kids getting up to their eyeballs in trouble that the parents don't know about!
~~Cherry~~
http://cherrymedarlin.blogspot.com
"A thing is as simple or as complicated as you make it." --TT Murphy |
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FebruaryViolet
True Blue Farmgirl
4810 Posts
Jonni
Elsmere
Kentucky
USA
4810 Posts |
Posted - Jun 18 2009 : 05:58:42 AM
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It is across the board, I'm sure, but honestly, I've worked in a lot of places but never with anyone younger than me...and we have 3 positions in which the employees are all early to mid 20's...We've had a couple of law clerks that I wanted to hang by their thumbs (but they suffered from the "I was born privileged, why should I have to rake leaves!?" mentality) but this gal is just oblivious.
I don't know if it's just my personality or what, but I'll apologize for something I didn't even do! So, it's bizarro to me to be so self-unaware, or maybe it's like that segment on 60 minutes Jus and I saw last year sometime--basically, the younger generation (Prairie Princess, this does not include you, based on your admissions :)) were raised to always be "winners" no losers...their sports teams all got trophies, even if they lost the tournament, they don't get "F"'s anymore on report cards, just "IS" for insufficient, so the reality is, they don't comprehend failure, losing or being wrong. The 60 minutes piece said they have enormous difficulty in the workplace, especially with authority and consequence--because there never has been any for them.
I'm going to say she's a part of this whole ME generation...I am Generation X and they thought WE'D bring the world down..man oh man they better rethink that one!!!!
Musings from our family in the Bluegrass http://sweetvioletmae.blogspot.com/ |
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Amie C.
True Blue Farmgirl
2099 Posts
Finger Lakes Region
NY
2099 Posts |
Posted - Jun 18 2009 : 06:32:39 AM
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There's another side to the ME generation too. I come from the lower end of the social spectrum, and what I see more of is not kids who were coddled but kids who were ignored or fell through the cracks. They also have problems with authority and consequences, but it's not so much because they don't understand that they can fail to satisfy requirements. It's more like they stopped believing any expectations applied to them a long time ago. Like for instance, my two sisters ages 22 and 19. They both dropped out of school at 16, one of them got pregnant at 17, neither of them has any sense of failure over these things. They take the attitude that school just wasn't for them. And they are pretty good kids considering their social circle...they don't do drugs, they aren't in any danger of going to jail.
I tend to see this as the fruit of the hippie and punk generations. We've got the world of individual freedom and no social constraint that was held up as the ideal...so how do we like it? |
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junkjunkie
True Blue Farmgirl
1306 Posts
Judy
Lawrenceville
NJ
USA
1306 Posts |
Posted - Jun 18 2009 : 4:45:49 PM
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I know I'll sound like an old fogey...but 'what's the matter with kids today?'...as the song goes. What gets me is that a lot of them don't seem to know common courtesy of saying 'thank you'or making eye contact when being spoken to. Rarely does one ever hold the door for you when you are right behind them. It's like they are so involved with texting, cell phones, computers, twittering, etc. that they are detached from actually dealing with a live human being. There's a vacant look about them...makes me want to shake them. I agree with Amie with the hippies and being progressive caused a lot of throwing out all the rules and letting whatever fly. A lot of parents want to be a friend or peer instead of parents. Very sad...it doesn't bode too well for the future.
"To have life in focus, we must have death in our field of vision." Benedictine monk John Main |
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laurzgot
True Blue Farmgirl
1704 Posts
Laurie
Alvin
Texas
USA
1704 Posts |
Posted - Jun 18 2009 : 5:20:28 PM
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parenets need to be parents and notletting things fly. You could still be a parent and a friend at the same time. Kids might get angry with a parent telling them what or what not to do but later in life they will be thankful for parents being a parent. I have three grown kiddos and they respect the older person, say thankyou and so on.
Laurie
suburban countrygirl at heart |
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FebruaryViolet
True Blue Farmgirl
4810 Posts
Jonni
Elsmere
Kentucky
USA
4810 Posts |
Posted - Jun 19 2009 : 05:50:28 AM
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Judy, if you sound like an old fogie, then I do, too and I'm 35!!! I think I've said those very same words about wanting to "shake them"...I think teens are (for the most part) lacking in some hormonal thing that makes them utterly dense for about 3-4 years (14-18)...for example, I went to a restaurant a few weeks back and needed to take Violet to the restroom with me because I was by myself. So, I pick up the carseat with her in it (which makes me, like 2 people walking side by side) and I attempt to walk into the restroom, where there are 2 teenage girls and 2 teenage guys talking and hanging outside the door (??). I said excuse me 3 times and finally, just barrelled my way through (um, because the car seat with a 12 lb. baby gets heavy for someone who's small like me and well...I said it 3 times!!!)...I was met with the most horrific looks and snears from those two girls. And, I guess because I'm a mom now, and much older than them, I said, "oh, get over it you little twits!" And I didn't feel bad about it at all!
Musings from our family in the Bluegrass http://sweetvioletmae.blogspot.com/ |
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Contrary Wife
True Blue Farmgirl
2164 Posts
Teresa Sue
Tekoa
WA
USA
2164 Posts |
Posted - Jun 19 2009 : 06:33:39 AM
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LOl!!
Teresa Sue
Farmgirl Sister #316
Planting Zone 4
"Learn the rules so you know how to break them properly." The Dalai Lama |
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LauriP
True Blue Farmgirl
239 Posts
Laurianne
Hertford
North Carolina
USA
239 Posts |
Posted - Jun 19 2009 : 11:22:17 AM
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 ~~ Oh...the Rude-Thang is not just with younger people -- When I worked at the library, I had a co-worker who just expected all the other people to do her job...she'd come in 15 minutes late..meander around the shelves for about 20 minutes, then go on her 10 a.m. break for 15 minutes..
An' guess who had to take up the slack??
This co-worker also would sit and brag about being able to get food-stamps illegally (sp), fill out forms for Welfare to her advantage...etc., etc. -- And all the time I'm thinking of how much in Federal Taxes we were watching float out the window on toms paycheck..
I couldn't complain about this co-worker tho, 'cause she'd been there over 10 (!!!) years, and her behavior was just accepted. By the time I left the library, I told myself I'd never go back to work there ever, Evah again. An' I haven't!!
Laurianne |
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junkjunkie
True Blue Farmgirl
1306 Posts
Judy
Lawrenceville
NJ
USA
1306 Posts |
Posted - Jun 19 2009 : 4:17:38 PM
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LOL! That's great, Jonni! Many a time I find it hard to hold my tongue....
"To have life in focus, we must have death in our field of vision." Benedictine monk John Main |
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junkjunkie
True Blue Farmgirl
1306 Posts
Judy
Lawrenceville
NJ
USA
1306 Posts |
Posted - Jun 19 2009 : 4:36:11 PM
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Laurianne, You're right...rudeness isn't exclusive to teenagers. I work and live near a town that is affluent, and because the town has a little 'cachet'...the sheer arrogance of the people is amazing. I could be walking on the sidewalk...keeping on my side when someone approaches, so they can pass. Well....they're not going to move over...they practically walk right into me and I have no where to go other than being practically pushed into the shrubs. I've gotten to the point that I'll keep on my side, but won't budge if someone doesn't feel like moving. A couple of times, I've simply stopped in front of them....uuhhh...'excuse me!'. When driving, there are pedestrian walkways on the streets for people to cross, and you automatically stop for them. That's fine, no problem. People don't adhere to that and cross randomly whenever they feel like it, and move slowly...sometimes looking at you like they're 'so hot'. You really have to have eyes all over your head in that town! At least, if you're going to do that...move quickly and give a wave of thanks. It's especially bad with the students (university town)...spoiled and rich brats! People have they're nose up in the air most times. Sometimes, as an experiment, I'll make eye contact with the person approaching. Immediately, eyes are averted...nose up in the air. Usually, though, with older or elderly people you'll get a 'good morning' or 'hello'. They're the last generation to have true manners and class anymore. Sorry...venting today.
"To have life in focus, we must have death in our field of vision." Benedictine monk John Main |
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goneriding
True Blue Farmgirl
1599 Posts
Winona
Central Oregon
USA
1599 Posts |
Posted - Jun 19 2009 : 9:13:46 PM
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My FIL is like this and he's way over 80! I don't know what it is but no one, but no one will stand up to him. My hubby has gotten to where he sort of avoids him after I said that if my FIL kicked my mini-doxies again, I would be all over him. But the rest of the family?? Oh, gosh!! Don't do something cuz my FIL 'might' get upset!! Doesn't hold water with me though. I was pleasantly surprised when my BIL said 'so what' when my SIL said that my FIL was upset about a little nothing. My SIL complained about it to me but I had to side with my BIL, I don't get why the family is so afraid to upset my FIL.
I've worked with younger people who do this too...that's why I'm a truck driver and I can leave them in the dust...hehehe...
Actually, I think it's all about power over another person, short and sweet.
Winona ;-)
To read funny stories about my cooking 'skills', please visit http://lostadventuresincooking.blogspot.com/
For uber-opinionated, pleasurable horse related reading, please visit http://horseinfoperson.blogspot.com/
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paradiseplantation
True Blue Farmgirl
1277 Posts
julie
social springs community
Louisiana
USA
1277 Posts |
Posted - Jun 20 2009 : 06:14:18 AM
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Ladies - I think what I'm hearing here is that all of us were taught the basic courtesys, but I know so many people in my age group (45 - 55) who's parents never taught them. They all thought my parents were horrible -- my dh's ex even complained to the judge while she was on the stand that I made her kids say 'yes ma'am and no ma'am' and that that was such (and I quote!) 'a backwoods redneck Southern tradition'. Trust me. The judge very quickly explained to her that he was a 'backwoods redneck Southern judge' and in HIS courtroom, that 'backwoods redneck Southern tradition' would be upheld without question!!!!! I think the ME ME spans the ages though, because I have an 88 year old aunt that is all that, and more. We don't argue with her because none of us wants to be the one to cause a stroke! But others? No, ma'am. We don't put up with it, and try very gently to either disagree or remove ourselves from the discussion. Now, my kids? Even at 21 & 23, we'll either call them down or make them prove their point. Like when they were kids. They would ask what a word meant, and we'd tell them to go get a dictionary. To this day, James will start to ask me what something means and then the next thing I know, he shuts up, goes and gets a dictionary, and brings it back into the kitchen. I think he finally learned at least ONE lesson!!!! Now, if I can just get him to learn the other 4 million, I might just have a good kid, yet!
from the hearts of paradise... |
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JessieMae
True Blue Farmgirl
702 Posts
Jessie
Raleigh
North Carolina
USA
702 Posts |
Posted - Jun 20 2009 : 06:26:53 AM
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You all should read this book I'm reading: "The Narcissism Epidemic: Living in the Age of Entitlement" by Jean M. Twenge Ph.D. and W. Keith Campbell Ph.D. It's the best book I've read this year. Really talks about where we are, how we got here, and what needs to be done.
Jessie Mae
Farmgirl Sisterhood #134 |
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FebruaryViolet
True Blue Farmgirl
4810 Posts
Jonni
Elsmere
Kentucky
USA
4810 Posts |
Posted - Jun 22 2009 : 05:47:20 AM
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That sounds like a wonderful book, Jessie...I'm VERY interested in reading it.
Musings from our family in the Bluegrass http://sweetvioletmae.blogspot.com/ |
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countrykatgirly
True Blue Farmgirl
186 Posts
Hallie
Jordan
NY
USA
186 Posts |
Posted - Jun 22 2009 : 07:47:07 AM
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I see a lot of permissive parenting being practiced and I see parents with no work ethic. And look at the beggars; I see them on almost every corner, even right across from the local high school. Get a freakin' job. What kind of example is that setting for today's youth?
**Farmgirl Sister #622**
“It is the sweet, simple things of life which are the real ones after all.”
--Laura Ingalls Wilder
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Edited by - countrykatgirly on Jun 22 2009 07:47:49 AM |
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Across the Fence: Dontcha love folks who are NEVER wrong? |
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Dontcha love folks who are NEVER wrong?
