| Author |
Family Matters:  Growing Old Together...Nearing The End  |
|
|
kristin sherrill
True Blue Farmgirl
11303 Posts
kristin
chickamauga
ga
USA
11303 Posts |
 Posted - Dec 20 2008 : 9:38:32 PM
|
Several months ago I wrote about my friend's parent's. Her mother has pancreatic cancer and her father has alzheimers and other problems. They are living at my friend's house up the road from me now.
I have been staying with them while my friend works for the past few months. I have really enjoyed the time I've spent with them. They both are very interesting people. But months ago the doctors told the family she would not live more than 3-4 months. Well, it's been nearly 3 months now and she is showing signs of the cancer progressing. She's in lots of pain and very tired and doesn't know why she's this way. It's so sad to see this. And her husband doesn't really know why, either.
They've been married over 60 years and when they look at each other and smile, it's just the neatest thing to see. She gets upset at him sometimes, but they have the sweetest moments together.
So I talked to my friend tonight and she has a lady that is going to start full time all week with her parents. Starting this Monday. I am a little sad about this, but also a little relieved, too. Because she is a trained professional who does this alot and knows what to do in case something goes wrong. I would not know what to do.
So I will drop by to see them a few times a week and maybe sit with them when she needs a break. I will miss being there. They so remind me of my grandparents. I was not with them when they were this way and I feel like God has given me this opportunity to see what it would have been like. And maybe give me experience for when my parents need me.
So I ask for prayers and thoughts for this beautiful lady at the end of a wonderful life, that she will not have too much suffering.
Thanks for letting me tell this. It is a great thing to know people like this and to be a part of their lives for a short time.
Kris
Turn your face to the sun and the shadows fall behind you. Maori proverb |
|
|
abbysshadow
True Blue Farmgirl
224 Posts
Sherry
Dayton
Nevada
USA
224 Posts |
Posted - Dec 23 2008 : 12:23:32 PM
|
Aww, Kristin, I know you are a blessing to them, and them to you...it's a beautiful, bittersweet time, for sure.
...I cannot do all the good that the world needs, but the world needs all the good that I can do... |
 |
|
|
MsCwick
True Blue Farmgirl
775 Posts
Cristine
Farmville
Virginia
USA
775 Posts |
Posted - Dec 23 2008 : 1:47:03 PM
|
God sends us on these wonderful journies for a reason. You are blessed to be on it!
My grandmother died of pancreatic cancer, and I remember the last time I saw her(we had to travel to NJ to say goodbye) and it was terrible *tears welling up* :/ I was 12 or so, I think about her every day...Although it's hard, it's good for the spirit...I'm sure they enjoy you as well! |
|
|
|
acairnsmom
True Blue Farmgirl
1319 Posts
audrey
cheyenne
wy
1319 Posts |
Posted - Dec 23 2008 : 3:42:42 PM
|
God Bless you Kristin for staying with them. You have touched this family in ways you'll never know about. My mother died from pancreatic cancer and although it is a quite quick disease, it is also very painful. It will be good for a trained professional to be with her and be able to assist her in her final days. But it will be important to you to continue to visit with this woman and her husband since you've already formed attachments to them. Your visitations will mean so much to your friend. It sounds like you've been a blessing and in turn have also been blessed. You are in my prayers.
Audrey
Toto, we're not in Kansas any more! |
|
|
|
JoyIowa
True Blue Farmgirl
273 Posts
Joy
273 Posts |
Posted - Dec 23 2008 : 5:03:15 PM
|
Kristin,
I read your words as tears well up. When my dad was ill with cancer, and was nearing the end, everyone stayed away. Some didn't want to be reminded this great man was human, some were afraid of "catching" it, some didn't know what to do so did nothing, everyone had their own reasons, and I respect that even though after 27 years I don't understand it. Believe me ANY time you can give them a bit of time and a presence it is appreciated more than I can ever express!!! I thank God their are angels like you who can put aside fears and doubts and be there!!!
Love,
Joy
If it's not illegal, unsafe, or immoral, why not try anything once? Who knows? You may come back for a second helping! |
|
|
|
lacisne88
True Blue Farmgirl
1181 Posts
Chelsey
Lake Stevens
Washington
USA
1181 Posts |
Posted - Dec 23 2008 : 5:24:04 PM
|
This is beautiful. Nowadays, all you hear about is one divorce after another. My parents are divorced. When I marry, I want it to be for the long haul. I don't want to split up when things get tough. I mean, marriage goes through ups and downs and I don't want to seperate just because it is hard. Although I also know, especially from my own parents that people don't plan on getting a divorce. Some people just grow apart and become different than they once were. I'm happy to hear about these two wonderful people!
Chelsey
Farmgirl Sister #283
http://farmgirlpleasures.blogspot.com/
http://aminiatureworld.blogspot.com/ |
|
|
|
kristin sherrill
True Blue Farmgirl
11303 Posts
kristin
chickamauga
ga
USA
11303 Posts |
Posted - Dec 24 2008 : 5:44:46 PM
|
I got to be with them Monday and Tuesday all day. The full time lady won't start til Jan. now. So I have next week, too.
Thank you all for the sweet words. It really has been a blessing to me. I didn't know what to expect at first and was a little reluctant about what to do and if I would be bored with nothing to do in between meals. But I have the best time with them. They are so funny and have lots to say. He is very forgetful and will even forgot he just ate and go back in the kitchen looking around like he's trying to figure out why he's there. I'll tell him he just ate and he laughs and gets a cup of coffee and a cookie. He's a mess. He's the same age my dad would have been if he were still living. I think that's one reason I like doing this so much.
So hug your parents and grandparents close and love them much.
Kris
Turn your face to the sun and the shadows fall behind you. Maori proverb |
|
|
|
LivingWell4You
True Blue Farmgirl
1411 Posts
Karen
Hillsboro
MO
USA
1411 Posts |
Posted - Dec 26 2008 : 05:14:54 AM
|
Kristin and everyone who has posted, you have me in tears. I cared for my father the last years of his life and it's something I will always treasure.
Kristin, as others have said, you are doing something not many today are willing to interrupt their lives for. You are a tremendous blessing to them. Don't ever underestimate how much your being with them means to the couple and their daughter. And I know you are receiving just as much, if not more.
God bless you.
God bless -
Karen ~ Chickherder & Farmgirl Sister #311 |
|
|
|
dutchy
True Blue Farmgirl
4427 Posts
4427 Posts |
Posted - Dec 26 2008 : 05:26:39 AM
|
Brought tears to me as well.
I have taken care of my momma single handedly for the last 6 plus years of her life too.
Hard but would do it all over again.
many hugs to all of you :)
Hugs from Marian/Dutchy, a farmgirl from the Netherlands :)
My personal blog:
http://just-me-a-dutch-girl.blogspot.com/
Again new creations added, too cute lol. Come and check it out!!
http://princess-of-pink-creations.blogspot.com/
|
|
|
| |
Family Matters: Growing Old Together...Nearing The End |
|
Growing Old Together...Nearing The End
