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 I'm Going to Be a Little Quiet For a While.
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Author Across the Fence: Previous Topic I'm Going to Be a Little Quiet For a While. Next Topic
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Mumof3
True Blue Farmgirl

3890 Posts

Karin
Ellenwood GA
USA
3890 Posts

Posted - Sep 23 2008 :  1:44:30 PM  Show Profile
My dad informed me that he wants to divorce my mother. After almost 52 years of marriage. How do I wrap my head around this one?

Karin

Farmgirl Sister
# 18 :)



www.perfectlittlemiracle.blogspot.com

Jami
True Blue Farmgirl

1238 Posts

Jami
Ellensburg WA
USA
1238 Posts

Posted - Sep 23 2008 :  1:50:14 PM  Show Profile
I can't type the words that came into my head when I read your post...it's kind of like holey guacamole!! I don't know how you wrap your brain around that one...whew. I'd be wondering if some sort of dementia was coming on in your dad and he forgot how many years they've known each other--guess that could work against him too?

Hang in there..will be thinking of you.

Jami in WA

Farmgirl Sister #266
http://woolyinwashington.wordpress.com/

Edited by - Jami on Sep 23 2008 1:50:51 PM
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Txfarmgal
True Blue Farmgirl

585 Posts

AK

USA
585 Posts

Posted - Sep 23 2008 :  1:57:26 PM  Show Profile
Karin, I sent you an email. My heart breaks for you, your mom, dad and family. So long to be married to just walk away. Know you are in my thoughts and prayers. hugs and blessings.

AngiKay-farmgirl sister #301
www.angikay.etsy.com
Heart of TX chapter
Be strong and Courageous. Jos. 1:9

Texas 4H! http://texas4-h.tamu.edu/
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paradiseplantation
True Blue Farmgirl

1277 Posts

julie
social springs community Louisiana
USA
1277 Posts

Posted - Sep 23 2008 :  1:59:30 PM  Show Profile
Karin, my heart and prayers are so with you and your family. Like you, I just can't wrap my mind around it. If you need anything, or just a sounding board, feel free to email me -- I'll be there to listen!

from the hearts of paradise...
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Georgiann
True Blue Farmgirl

109 Posts

Georgiann
Seymour IN
USA
109 Posts

Posted - Sep 23 2008 :  2:03:31 PM  Show Profile
Karin, sending you prayers and peace.

Georgiann

www.oldsweetsong.blogspot.com
Whatever you do, do it with your whole heart
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katie-ell
True Blue Farmgirl

1818 Posts

Katie
Illinois
1818 Posts

Posted - Sep 23 2008 :  2:06:34 PM  Show Profile
My reaction was similar to Jami's -- is there an underlying physical ailment or depression that he's dealing with? Is he serious about divorcing your mother or is he venting?? And has he thought through the physical logistics of being on his own after so many years of marriage? Have you talked with your mother -- does she also want this?

My heart hurts for you . . . am hoping that there is a trusted friend or pastor who can help your parents through this, whatever their decision. And you have many friends here who are sending you strength and light.

katie

www.youaretoocreative.blogspot.com
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Miss Bee Haven
True Blue Farmgirl

4331 Posts

Janice
Louisville/Irvington Kentucky
USA
4331 Posts

Posted - Sep 23 2008 :  2:08:18 PM  Show Profile  Send Miss Bee Haven a Yahoo! Message
My heart breaks for all of you, too, Karin. My mom has been dead for four years and my dad still won't move anything around or sell her old car. I wonder if your dad has really thought about the history two people have together after such a long time. It's beyond sad.

Farmgirl Sister #50

"If you think you've got it nailed down, then what's all that around it?"
'Br.Dave Gardner'
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dkelewae
True Blue Farmgirl

1310 Posts

Diana
Saint Peters MO
USA
1310 Posts

Posted - Sep 23 2008 :  2:18:21 PM  Show Profile
Karin-My heart breaks for you and your mom. I too wonder like Jami did if there could be dementia, etc that's affecting his judgement. I'll certainly keep you all in my prayers.

Diana
Farmgirl Sister #272
St. Peters MO
Country Girl trapped in the city!
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Alee
True Blue Farmgirl

22937 Posts

Alee
Worland Wy
USA
22937 Posts

Posted - Sep 23 2008 :  2:28:16 PM  Show Profile  Send Alee a Yahoo! Message
Karin- I am so sorry for you and your family in this situation! I have no words to express my feelings. I keep trying to type something and it all comes out sounding not quite right. I will be thinking of you and your family often! *hugs*

Alee
Farmgirl Sister #8
www.awarmheart.com
Please come visit Nora and me on our blog: www.farmgirlalee.blogspot.com
Put your pin on the farmgirl map! www.farmgirlmap.blogspot.com
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melanie47601
True Blue Farmgirl

1949 Posts

Melanie
Boonville IN
USA
1949 Posts

Posted - Sep 23 2008 :  2:29:36 PM  Show Profile  Send melanie47601 a Yahoo! Message
Karin, you and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.

Melanie

~blog~ http://wheelsarealwaysturning.blogspot.com/ ~shop~ http://www.brokenin.ecrater.com/
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Mommyswanson
True Blue Farmgirl

463 Posts

Laura
Waukegan IL
USA
463 Posts

Posted - Sep 23 2008 :  4:34:31 PM  Show Profile
Karin

You & your family are in my prayers.

Laura

"That which does not kill us makes us strong!" "I cast all my cares upon you Lord."
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kristin sherrill
True Blue Farmgirl

11303 Posts

kristin
chickamauga ga
USA
11303 Posts

Posted - Sep 23 2008 :  4:43:45 PM  Show Profile
Karin, I, too, will keep you and your family in my prayers. Wow, I just can't even imagine what ya'll are going through right now.

Kris
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bushelnpeck
True Blue Farmgirl

262 Posts

Debbie
Sparks Nv
USA
262 Posts

Posted - Sep 23 2008 :  4:50:24 PM  Show Profile  Send bushelnpeck an AOL message
Heart hurts for you and your family. May clarity and sound advice be yours as you go through this with your parents...grieving doesn't even begin to express how you must be feeling...prayers and comfort to you...Debbie

Farmgirl Sister #324

duty makes us do things, but love, makes us do things beautifully...
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lilyblossom
True Blue Farmgirl

416 Posts

Donna
Evansville IN
USA
416 Posts

Posted - Sep 23 2008 :  5:18:43 PM  Show Profile
Karin - I am sorry that you and your mother are going through this. Like others have mentioned dementia comes to mind. Maybe you could ask your dad to see a doctor for a check up before he pursues any legal matters.

Donna...true blue KY farmgirl, farmgirl #86
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kmbrown
True Blue Farmgirl

459 Posts

Misty
Waynesboro Pennsylvania
USA
459 Posts

Posted - Sep 23 2008 :  5:28:51 PM  Show Profile
Karin, I am really sorry for you as you are trying to make sense of this terrible news. I really can not even imagine what you are going through. My mom and dad have been married for 31 years and I can't imagine how betrayed and hurt I would feel if one of them left the other. I wish I could think of something to say to make it all better, but since I can't just know I and lots of others are standing by you quietly supporting you in this trying time. Praying for sufficient grace to you and your momma.
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Carol Sue
True Blue Farmgirl

4033 Posts

Carol Sue
Washingtonian
USA
4033 Posts

Posted - Sep 23 2008 :  6:23:17 PM  Show Profile
Ahhh Karin, I think you are more than likely in shock for a bit and there are no words to say to any part of this.
((((((hugs))))))




Farmgirl #39
www.Quitemoments.blogspot.com
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Tina Michelle
True Blue Farmgirl

6948 Posts

Tina
sunshine state FL
USA
6948 Posts

Posted - Sep 23 2008 :  7:22:22 PM  Show Profile
ok well yeah something else definitely is going on. being married for 52 yrs puts your dad and mom both at about 70 yrs of age.
I'd actually set them both down together and find a mediator to discuss what in the heck is going on.


~Seize the Day! Live, Love, Laugh~
visit me at:
http://gardengoose.blogspot.com/
and at www.stliving.net
you can also check out my etsy shops at:http://GardenGooseGifts.etsy.com
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Tina Michelle
True Blue Farmgirl

6948 Posts

Tina
sunshine state FL
USA
6948 Posts

Posted - Sep 23 2008 :  7:30:55 PM  Show Profile
I agree that it very well could be a medical problem of some sort at the root of this. best of wishes and hugs to you.

~Seize the Day! Live, Love, Laugh~
visit me at:
http://gardengoose.blogspot.com/
and at www.stliving.net
you can also check out my etsy shops at:http://GardenGooseGifts.etsy.com
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Aunt Jenny
True Blue Farmgirl

11381 Posts

Jenny
middle of Utah
USA
11381 Posts

Posted - Sep 23 2008 :  9:06:32 PM  Show Profile
Oh Karin!! I don't even know what to say...I am emailing you right now!!

Jenny in Utah
Proud Farmgirl sister #24
Inside me there is a skinny woman crying to get out...but I can usually shut her up with cookies
http://www.auntjennysworld.blogspot.com/ visit my little online shop at www.auntjenny.etsy.com
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therusticcottage
True Blue Farmgirl

4439 Posts

Kay
Vancouver WA
USA
4439 Posts

Posted - Sep 23 2008 :  11:16:17 PM  Show Profile
Karin - I am so sorry. I know this is devastating for you. Hugs.

Handmade Soap and More! - http://therusticcottage.etsy.com
The Rustic Cottage Blog http://therusticcottage.blogspot.com

PROUD FARMGIRL SISTER #100
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Tapestry
True Blue Farmgirl

1223 Posts

Cheryl
Wisconsin
USA
1223 Posts

Posted - Sep 23 2008 :  11:53:39 PM  Show Profile  Send Tapestry a Yahoo! Message
Karin I'm so very sorry that this is something you're having to deal with now. I agree with others who question if there may be a health issue driving this? Keeping you in my prayers and bless you during this time of struggle.
Huggzz

Happy farmgirl sister #353


Look for rainbows instead of mud puddles

http://tapestrysimaginings.blogspot.com/
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Amie C.
True Blue Farmgirl

2099 Posts


Finger Lakes Region NY
2099 Posts

Posted - Sep 24 2008 :  05:46:46 AM  Show Profile
What a shock. Karin, I'm so sorry. I can't imagine how I would feel if my parents decided to divorce. Even as an adult, a change in that relationship is like the ground shifting under your feet. I'll be thinking of you.
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Ga Girl
True Blue Farmgirl

2355 Posts

Karen
Meansville Ga.
USA
2355 Posts

Posted - Sep 24 2008 :  05:48:48 AM  Show Profile
Karin, I will be praying for you and your family. I know that words are not much when you have such a thing on your shoulders but know that God is with you so you will not be left alone.
Farmgirl hugs, Karen

Create in me a pure heart,O God and renew a steadfast spirit within me. Psalms 51:10 http://farmgirlingastyle.blogspot.com/
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neighsayer
True Blue Farmgirl

81 Posts

Shirley
Arabi GA
USA
81 Posts

Posted - Sep 24 2008 :  05:57:34 AM  Show Profile  Send neighsayer a Yahoo! Message
Prayers and hugs to you!

Thank God I live in the country!
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wild daisy
True Blue Farmgirl

503 Posts

Madelynne
Billings Montana
USA
503 Posts

Posted - Sep 24 2008 :  10:05:19 AM  Show Profile
My parents divorced after 37 years of marriage. They needed to because they could not get along after the last kid turned 18 and other issues. Sometimes it's hard to see a family split in two. I have six other siblings and it has split us as well. I try to keep some contact with them but feelings are hard to heal. Keep the door open and things might get a little easier for you. Don't forget the good times.....

Madelynne
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Mumof3
True Blue Farmgirl

3890 Posts

Karin
Ellenwood GA
USA
3890 Posts

Posted - Sep 24 2008 :  10:12:17 AM  Show Profile
Thank you all so very, very much for your words of comfort and your prayers for my family. I am so thankful to have women such as you, who are understanding and compassionate and kind. After pondering this during the night and today, I am much more calm. Without revealing the details of my parent's marriage, I will just say that this is a culmination of years of discord.
My mom does not know. She is coming home Friday after visiting her sister for the summer. My dad is going to give her a chance, to see if her attitude and behavior have changed towards him. If not, he is prepared. I'm pretty sure that she has been as grateful for her time away as he has. There is a reason we call them The Bickersons. Not funny, but if you don't laugh.......
I do not feel it is my place to try and alter my dad's decision, but I have voiced my perspective on both of their behaviors over the years. My dad took it well.
Thank you again, sweet friends.

Karin


Farmgirl Sister
# 18 :)



www.perfectlittlemiracle.blogspot.com

Edited by - Mumof3 on Sep 24 2008 10:12:37 AM
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