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Hogs & Quiches & Prayers Round-up:  Courage to leave my job  |
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bboopster
True Blue Farmgirl
1140 Posts
Betty Jo
West Bend
Wisconsin
USA
1140 Posts |
 Posted - Nov 10 2007 : 07:56:56 AM
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Here I sit scared to death about my future. I have been at this fork just one other time in my life and that was when my husband left me with 5 children to raise. Yesterday was the worst day of the last year at the day care that I work at. 2 teachers quit which brings us to 6 openings for teachers and 80 children enrolled. My boss's remark was "Oh I'll just work a few more hours". We are consistently over our ratios which causes the children to have VERY poor behavior and teachers to stress. Most of our teachers are under educated which makes matters worse as they do not have the skills to deal with the behaviors. I hurt my back last April because of having to control children who attack other children as my boss accepts children with disabilities that the teachers can not handle. I have a background in special education but can not physically restrain them anymore. Which I have had to do numerous time a day. Which has landed me in PT and lots of $$$$ in alternative medicine and the possibility of back surgery. My boss also spends money like no tomorrow. Spends her day on the computer shopping and then wants to know were all the money goes. Is in trouble with the IRS for non-tax payments. Hires her whole family at inflated salaries and then pays her employees next to nothing which gives us the bottom of the barrel employees. My DH yesterday told me ENOUGH!!!!!! I do have a Christmas job lined up selling See's candy at a local mall for almost the same amount of money I make now. But in January I will be unemployed. Scary!!!!! I have always wanted to make my interests into an income but scared that I won't be able to do it. We also need health insurance and do to our ages 50ish individual insurance is very expensive. (My husband is self-employed) We can cobra for 18 months so that's good. Sunday my husband and I are going to clean out all my preschool items and on Monday I break it to my boss that I am leaving and going to let her know exactly why. She is going to be very made and hurt must likely will tell me to leave without notice. I am so torn about this but know it is for the best. Oh I hate life changing decisions. They are so scary. Maybe I'll become a private Nanny?
3 Blue Star Mother and Proud of it!
Pray for our troops to come home safe and soon.
Enjoying the road to the simple life :>) |
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Firemama
True Blue Farmgirl
1731 Posts
Amanda
Medical Lake
WA
USA
1731 Posts |
Posted - Nov 10 2007 : 09:12:00 AM
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Betty Jo, that is ahard decision, and it sounds like you already know what to do.I think you are making the right one,yes it is scary, but being hurt on thejob & not treated right,hmmmm not good either. Good luck,I'll be thinking of you.
Mama to 2
Your FreckleFaced Farm Girl!!
http://myfarmdreams.blogspot.com/
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Canadian farmgirl
True Blue Farmgirl
482 Posts
Lori
Ontario
Canada
482 Posts |
Posted - Nov 10 2007 : 09:58:09 AM
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There is nothing worse than waking up every day dreading going to a job you hate. The stress that you are under will take its toll on you. You already know what you have to do. Your boss treats everyone else like dirt, so don't be too worried about hurting her feelings.
This is a scary time, but you will get through it. Sounds like you have a supportive husband, too. Things will be ok, ask God to help, He always listens!
Good luck,
Lori |
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peggysue
True Blue Farmgirl
267 Posts
Peggy
Tulsa
Oklahoma
267 Posts |
Posted - Nov 10 2007 : 10:49:30 AM
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sending prayers your way
peggy sue |
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Tina Michelle
True Blue Farmgirl
6948 Posts
Tina
sunshine state
FL
USA
6948 Posts |
Posted - Nov 10 2007 : 11:18:38 AM
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find an insurance agent that can shop around for you on the health insurance. no need to pay out the wazoo for the cobra plan.
I think that you can do it. And best of wishes. Sounds like it is the right thing, and yes change is scary, but sometimes necessary.
big hugs to you.
~Seize the Day! Live, Love, Laugh~
visit me at:
http://gardengoose.blogspot.com/
and at www.stliving.net
you can also check out my etsy shops at:http://GardenGooseGifts.etsy.com |
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Peanut
True Blue Farmgirl
603 Posts
Jennifer
Waverly
Virginia
USA
603 Posts |
Posted - Nov 10 2007 : 11:32:34 AM
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I agree with Tina Michelle. I have a daycare in my home and we have private insurance - what makes it expensive is the maternity rider. If you're 50, you may not need that. ;)
I make very good money staying at home and I get to choose the families I work with - that really keeps headaches to a minimum. I'm a year and a half into my business and I have a waiting list already. I only keep 5 children full-time because I had no desire to get involved with social services. Plus - you're the BOSS.
If you can't keep children in your home for whatever reason, look into being a private nanny... that is a very good idea.
"What is a farm but a mute gospel?"
Ralph Waldo Emerson |
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therusticcottage
True Blue Farmgirl
4439 Posts
Kay
Vancouver
WA
USA
4439 Posts |
Posted - Nov 10 2007 : 11:39:35 AM
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Betty Jo -- the place your work for sounds like it's on the road to disaster. My heart breaks to think that parents are leaving their children every day thinking they are getting good care. The woman that owns that place does not deserve to be in business. Your husband is right -- you need to leave immediately! There is nothing worse than going to a job that you hate to do -- been there, done that many times. Our lives are too short to have to live that way.
You will find something else or start your own daycare from your home. You'll make more money and the only one you'll have to report to is you! Good luck in whatever you decide to do.
Visit my Etsy Shop! http://therusticcottage.etsy.com
http://therusticcottage.blogspot.com |
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peggysue
True Blue Farmgirl
267 Posts
Peggy
Tulsa
Oklahoma
267 Posts |
Posted - Nov 10 2007 : 1:12:35 PM
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i can't really say that i blame you for leaving...i pray that you will find something that is right for you soon
peggysue |
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Duchess
True Blue Farmgirl
109 Posts
Iowa
USA
109 Posts |
Posted - Nov 10 2007 : 1:20:48 PM
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Being able to wake up and look forward to the day is a gift you need to give yourself. Stress does terrible things to our mind, our body and our relationships. Sit down and make a list, the things your are good at, the things you really, really like. Study that list being very honest and see where it leads you. The saying of a new door opening as one closes is very true, it's just up to us to walk through it. People will pay top dollar to have good reliable child care, you can specialize only babies or only after school.
Best of luck to you, I know you can do it!!
http://theclarkhomestead.blogspot.com/ |
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therealshari
True Blue Farmgirl
235 Posts
Shari
Beryl
UT
USA
235 Posts |
Posted - Nov 10 2007 : 2:14:28 PM
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You're in my prayers. I've made "life changes" more than once, but thankfully I didn't have other's who depended upon me.
You'll find the right career move. In the meantime, I'd love to give you a copy of an e-book I wrote a few years ago. It's called "From Failure to Success: Answer 3 Questions". The first half is the story of some problems I had. The back half is your own personal workbook. What you write is your own business... and I can guarantee you'll find a lot of peace as you work through it.
You'll also find your passion, and most likely discover how to convert that passion to a career.
Simply send me an e-mail through the forum, and I'll provide you the link.
Shari
Shari Thomas
farmer, web copywriter, blogger
Shari's Gone Country
Vote for me at "Blog for a year" |
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kissmekate
True Blue Farmgirl
890 Posts
Kate
Delano
Minnesota
890 Posts |
Posted - Nov 10 2007 : 9:45:02 PM
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Betty Jo, I will say a prayer for you. Any job change is scary.
If you and your husband don't have major health issues, and can swing it, perhaps calling your regular insurance agent to see if you can at least get a basic "major medical" coverage type of policy-i.e. emergancy/hospital coverage.
Most standard insurance companies have this type of policy. It saved my brother tons of money buying that policy while he was jobless instead of paying through the nose for Cobra.
Don't miss out on a blessing, just because it isn't packaged the way you expected. ~MaryJo Copeland |
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MsCwick
True Blue Farmgirl
775 Posts
Cristine
Farmville
Virginia
USA
775 Posts |
Posted - Nov 10 2007 : 10:58:11 PM
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I like that private nanny idea. Im sure there are families with disabled children that could use your expertise, even if it's just for a few hours a week. People seem to pay well for that individual one on one experience. Especially in the special ed department?? best of luck. Just make sure you get the major medical insurance.
BTW= God forbid that the authorities ever got involved in an incident that was caused by this lady's ignorance. Could you imagine being questioned for something that happened? That just sounds like a situation that should be avoided at all costs. I think you leaving that place would be wonderful, and to eliminate the stress and worry will be worth it. |
Edited by - MsCwick on Nov 10 2007 11:02:06 PM |
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bboopster
True Blue Farmgirl
1140 Posts
Betty Jo
West Bend
Wisconsin
USA
1140 Posts |
Posted - Nov 11 2007 : 06:46:07 AM
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Thank you Farmgirls for all your support. My DH and I will be picking up my belongings this morning just in case she gives my the boot right away. Shari I e-mailed you Thank you. God always provides and he has again. I was offered a full time job through the Christmas season with See's Candy. I had a part time one but a full time one came open yesterday. The pay is only a dollar less then I make now and all I have to do is smile and offer a sample of the candy. Even those who do not want one smile back. NO STRESS!!!! Than the old High School I worked in for 10 years has some substitute positions in the Special Ed Dept doing the same job I was doing before but on an on call basis. Pays not anywhere close to what I made before but who knows maybe it will lead back to a permanent position. I'm going to contact a few of the old teachers I worked with and see if they think I would be hired back. My oldest son has given me his old lap top (it's only a year old and he's out grown it) so That is my first piece of my new business equipment. My DH is backing me to get my dream of teaching Early Childhood continuing education classes to daycare teachers and holding craft and cooking classes for children. I have been in contact with some local agencies that conduct the classes and they have been very helpful in leading me in the right directions. My DH also has called his accountant to see what we can do to get me on his payroll so we can shop for group insurance. I'm still scared but today I'm filled with excitment at what the future may hold. As my Dh said last night if things are really tight it means we will just have to spend more time together. Not a bad thing. 
3 Blue Star Mother and Proud of it!
Pray for our troops to come home safe and soon.
Enjoying the road to the simple life :>) |
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CountryBorn
True Blue Farmgirl
1545 Posts
Mary Jane
New York
USA
1545 Posts |
Posted - Nov 11 2007 : 1:58:10 PM
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Betty Jo,
Things do have a way of working out for the best. I am sure you will be fine and a lot happier out of there. I hope your dreams come true for you. It seems you have a wonderful husband there to back you up. The fact you are filled with excitement tells you that you are doing what is right for you!
MJ
There can be no happiness if the things we believe in are different from the things we do. Freya Stark |
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farmgirlwannabe
True Blue Farmgirl
114 Posts
audrina
Antelope
Ca
USA
114 Posts |
Posted - Nov 12 2007 : 03:06:36 AM
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Betty Jo,
I'm so glad that it seems like things are working in your favor once you made the decision to quit this place. I have to put in my two cents as a "rabble rouser", since this is what I do for a living- I work for the County Office Of Ed. and I provide on-site training to child care teachers on how to work with children with special needs. However, I spend more time than I would like to admit on "reminding" some teachers and directors about "basic" child care issues-(you can't sleep on the job, you have to watch the children, etc..) I definately would encourage you to tell the director exactly why you are quitting, and you might also want to remind her that while some parents will put up with almost anything because they need child care so desparately, eventually if she doesn't clean up her act she'll lose children, and that means she'll lose money. And I'd end with the fact that being over ratio is most assuredly a licensing violation; while I'm not up on licensing regs. for your area, they're usually pretty universal, and being over ratio is a big "no-no" most everywhere(for all the reasons you mentioned.) In fact, I'd guess she's got quite a few licensing violations going, and if it were me, I'd call in and report her after you leave. While I'm usually a pretty laid back, forgiving person, this is one area where I'm a bit of a "hard-***"- I'd report her in a New York minute. I don't fool around when it comes to kids; I've heard and seen too many horror stories to give a lot of second chances in this area. Sounds harsh, but oh well, I can live with that.
On a more positive note; I whole-heartedly agree with your plan to get more ECE units and either "nanny" or do in-home care. The one thing I can guarantee is that if you have a quality program and you truly care about children, you'll have no problem finding families that need you!
Good luck,
Audrina |
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Lainey
True Blue Farmgirl
2401 Posts
Elaine
Waco
Kentucky
USA
2401 Posts |
Posted - Nov 12 2007 : 11:58:24 AM
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I was in a similiar situation about 8 years ago. I was in a job that led to so much stress it made me ill. It took a long time for me to see it would be the best decision for my health, mentally and physically, to leave. I'd worked there for a long time before and leaving was hard, but in the end it was the best decision in my case. I agree with 'Duchess' above that being able to wake up and look forward to the day is a great gift. I hope everythng works out well for you. Take care!
http://countrygirldreams.blogspot.com/ |
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Peanut
True Blue Farmgirl
603 Posts
Jennifer
Waverly
Virginia
USA
603 Posts |
Posted - Nov 12 2007 : 1:07:51 PM
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Betty Jo, I'm glad that things are working out. I'm sure you feel as though a weight has been lifted from your shoulders!
"What is a farm but a mute gospel?"
Ralph Waldo Emerson |
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La Patite Ferme
True Blue Farmgirl
623 Posts
Jenn
CA
USA
623 Posts |
Posted - Nov 12 2007 : 9:08:38 PM
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Betty Jo,
Everything happens for a reason, even though it may not be immediately apparant. Once you're out and can relax and let your guard down you may see the possibilities more clearly. There is a plan for you, you just have read the signs.
You mentioned you'd like to teach cooking and ??? to children. I would suggest finding out about after school programs like the Boys & Girls Clubs or other day care providers that might be interested in those type of programs. If you don't need a full time job right away that may be an option you could be happy with after the holidays.
Hang in there. |
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Tina Michelle
True Blue Farmgirl
6948 Posts
Tina
sunshine state
FL
USA
6948 Posts |
Posted - Nov 12 2007 : 9:43:54 PM
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you could also approach shops like Cooking shops/Kitchen shops in your area ...and see about offering special classes geared towards parents and children..maybe a "Cooking in the Kitchen with Kids" special class.
~Seize the Day! Live, Love, Laugh~
visit me at:
http://gardengoose.blogspot.com/
and at www.stliving.net
you can also check out my etsy shops at:http://GardenGooseGifts.etsy.com |
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britchickny
True Blue Farmgirl
1048 Posts
Angie
Port Orange
Florida
1048 Posts |
Posted - Nov 13 2007 : 03:34:30 AM
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Betty Jo, sounds like you have a few options. Of course, every one will involve a compromise! Life is like that I guess! How about finding the local Home School connection to see if you could have a class once a week for the local home-schoolers?
I look forward to your future 'Success Reports"!
Angie.
"Mercy, peace and love be yours in abundance" JUDE 1:2 |
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bboopster
True Blue Farmgirl
1140 Posts
Betty Jo
West Bend
Wisconsin
USA
1140 Posts |
Posted - Nov 14 2007 : 10:18:53 AM
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Well I DID IT!!!!! My boss did not even flinch. Her come backs was The job's too hard for you is it not/ I told her NO!!! But then went on to list all the issues that needed to be fixed from cleanliness, to ratio's, to teachers with education, unorganization, lack of planning ect.... She told me she has been in this business for 25 years and is going strong. There is always a person on W2 that needs child care and since most of the time she does not require them to pay their co-pay she will always have children. The best was "They are all just ghetto people and they like ghetto so no need to change". Broke my heart. Low income children need more in order to break the cycle. So I will put in my two weeks of full time and could kick myself in the butt because I offered to work the 4:30am-9:30am shift (thought I would be helpful as it's a hard shift to cover) until the end of the year. On the up side I do have 3 families that are interested in my services as a nanny and have my first interview next week. One is a family who has 3 boys in our center and the youngest is being kicked out. He is just not cut out for daycare scene. He is 4 will go to kindergarten next year his older siblings are 7/10. The oldest is asbergers (?) mild autism. The dialiema is that it would only be for about 1.5 years as Mom finishes nursing school. But the up side is it is very close to home and she would be ok with me doing some private work during my hours at her house. This would be helpful with starting my side business. She also has time off from school that would give me extra time at home with hubby and we could get somethings done here or do some traveling for his business. The other families pay better and one would like someone who would travel with them. But for tonight I will go and sell my Chocolates in the world of the mall.
3 Blue Star Mother and Proud of it!
Pray for our troops to come home safe and soon.
Enjoying the road to the simple life :>) |
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Firemama
True Blue Farmgirl
1731 Posts
Amanda
Medical Lake
WA
USA
1731 Posts |
Posted - Nov 14 2007 : 10:22:44 AM
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Good for you BettyJo!! Give your self a pat on the back!!Goodluck with your upcoming adventure!!!
Mama to 2
Your FreckleFaced Farm Girl!!
http://myfarmdreams.blogspot.com/
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farmgirlwannabe
True Blue Farmgirl
114 Posts
audrina
Antelope
Ca
USA
114 Posts |
Posted - Nov 14 2007 : 11:59:46 AM
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Good for you Betty Jo, you did a great job, and it sounds like it's working out well for you-congratulations! I'm so glad for you that there's a happy ending to this story; because that lady is making my blood pressure rise!
Audrina |
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idcityrose
True Blue Farmgirl
202 Posts
Rose
Idaho City
Idaho
USA
202 Posts |
Posted - Nov 15 2007 : 10:28:34 AM
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Betty Jo, It sounds as if your heart knows what to do but it just needs to convince your head. Remember that when a door closes another opens. I hope 6 months from now you will find that you are so much happier by removing the daily stress from your life. I have been where you are, making changes and a wise friend of mine told me sometimes to need to take "A Leap of Faith" and that is what you need to remember. Everyone has fear of the unknown but where you were working is a horrible environment. This women should not be able to watch anyones children, ever.
Remember, you can always get emotional support from your fellow farmgirls, we are here for each other.
Farmgirl Love and Blessings to you and yours!
idcityrose
We are never alone in the forest of Sisters! We "Mountain Farmgirls" are outstanding in our field! |
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bboopster
True Blue Farmgirl
1140 Posts
Betty Jo
West Bend
Wisconsin
USA
1140 Posts |
Posted - Nov 24 2007 : 08:39:42 AM
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Well my last day was Friday except for the early morning shift I said I would work until 12/31. Hopefully she will fill it soon. I have also been offered a job as a nanny for 3 young boys 4,7,10 about five miles from my house. It does not pay as much as they other positions I was looking at but the fit feels good and I have been praying about this and only one answer has been coming back. Take this job. The women has a year and a half left of nursing school left, she is a single mom, the boy s have been attending the daycare I work at for about a year so I know the boys. The have some issues but I think that they are caused by a nasty divorce, death of the woman mother and being uprooted from mom who was a stay at home mom and now she is in school and life has so changed for her. The youngest one is actually getting kicked out of the daycare because of behavior but he and I get along fine. He just needs extra attention. So a new journey begins and I'm happy to say that I am following what God has told me to do this time straight out of the box rather then walking around the box first.
3 Blue Star Mother and Proud of it!
Pray for our troops to come home safe and soon.
Enjoying the road to the simple life :>) |
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Carol Sue
True Blue Farmgirl
4033 Posts
Carol Sue
Washingtonian
USA
4033 Posts |
Posted - Nov 24 2007 : 12:32:35 PM
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Betty J0,
C0ngratulati0ns f0r taking the "leap 0f faith" and landing exactly where y0u bel0ng. Pr0ud 0f y0u girlfriend.
Car0l Sue
listening to the quiet moments
www.Quitemoments.blogspot.com |
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Hogs & Quiches & Prayers Round-up: Courage to leave my job |
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Courage to leave my job
