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A Farm of My Own:  Considering a move -- Need Opinions Please  |
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willow
Farmgirl at Heart
2 Posts
2 Posts |
 Posted - Jun 13 2005 : 4:22:33 PM
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I am a born and raised suburban girl (my hubby was raised as a rural boy) We currently live in the suburbs but have the chance to move out to a 40 acre parcel that is about an hour from a large city and 15-20 minutes from a few tiny tiny towns. It sounds like this is a dream of many of you all at the Farmgirl Connection here, but I am uncomfortable with this (interested, but uncomfortable).
The 40 acres is surrounded by public lands on two sides and you cannot even see another house (although there are a few houses a few miles down the road). All that space somehow seems scary to me. I'm interested in it, but unsure of how I would feel about it once we got out there. And on days that my husband is in the city and my kids are in school, I'm worried about how I would feel all alone out there. I'm also worried about socializing my kids.
The easy answer I'm sure would be "Don't make the move", but I am truly interested in the "Country" Lifestyle. Has anyone had the same experience or can anyone offer any advice for me?
Thanks in advance for any info you can provide .
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Edited by - willow on Jun 13 2005 4:23:20 PM |
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Aunt Jenny
True Blue Farmgirl
11381 Posts
Jenny
middle of
Utah
USA
11381 Posts |
Posted - Jun 13 2005 : 6:38:30 PM
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I would love to have that decision to make too...but I know it must be hard for you. I have never been a real city girl..small town girl..and had my grandparents place to spend my time so I am used to alone in the country..and love it. I guess it does depend on what YOU like to do and all...I am sure looking forward to hearing how it goes....I am glad you are here!!
Jenny in Utah
The best things in life arn't things! |
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bramble
True Blue Farmgirl
2044 Posts
2044 Posts |
Posted - Jun 14 2005 : 04:23:10 AM
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Hi Willow and welcome to MJF. That's a HUGE life altering decison isn't it? Alot of good points made here but I would like to ask a few more things for you to consider. What age are your children? Will they attend the new public school or be home schooled? (This requires visiting the school(s) and checking out everything about them either way. Also if homeschooling because you will still have to be evaluated and follow a curriculum plan loosely based on what the district is doing). Are your children involved in alot of activities now that you think won't be available to them in the new location?
As for you... are you an independent , resourceful person who has alot of interests/ hobbies that you will be able to fulfill in the new location? Being alone shouldn't be lonely.You should feel comfortable and at home, without being afraid of the surrounding area.
What about medical help? DRs , hospital, clinics? Fire ? We have a friend that moved to VT about 20 years ago and their house burned to the ground. She kept saying I thought the fire dept would come. There was no fire dept. where they were. Only you will know if this feels like the right choice but don't let fear of the unknown prevent you from exploring( atleast investigating) an option that might change your life for the better. Make an informed and educated decision, but listen also to your heart.
with a happy heart |
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jpbluesky
True Blue Farmgirl
6066 Posts
Jeannie
Florida
USA
6066 Posts |
Posted - Jun 14 2005 : 05:02:46 AM
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Willow - welcome. Does the property seem beautiful to you? Do you like going there to see it? For me, a place becomes less uncomfortable and scary if I love to look at it, and if it makes me begin to think of things I could do while there. When you visit, do you have the urge to plant flowers in this spot and a maybe put a swing another?
Like Bramble said, listen to your heart. And do make sure about the availability of help in emergency situations.
jpbluesky
Heartland girl |
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CrabbyJo
Farmgirl at Heart
2 Posts
Jo
Clinton
Montana
USA
2 Posts |
Posted - Jun 14 2005 : 05:46:40 AM
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| willow, above all else, listen to your heart...that feeling in the pit of your tummy....I moved from the middle of town, which isn't that big, to almost 2 acres, and I WAS overwhelmed at first, there was just TOOO much land seemed like...but...I started listening to the quiet, and the birds, and the peace that came when I was there, and discovered I could do a little at a time. I didn't have to deal with all that space all at once, I carved out my own little "chunks" of flower gardens, vegatable garden, etc, and now, I wouldn't exchange that for anything...it is scary at first, and I did feel uncomfortable for a while, but the benefits outweighed my fears, and I think if you have a chance to give that to your kids you should go for it!! Good luck with your decision... |
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sleepless reader
True Blue Farmgirl
1022 Posts
CA
USA
1022 Posts |
Posted - Jun 14 2005 : 10:12:26 PM
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| Everybody has made very valid points! On a personal level; I moved to a fairly rural area about 18 years ago. It took a while to get used to the quite, the roaming night animals, being fairly far from neighbors and even farther from the grocery store. I've grown to love the quite of the night (and the days). I know the sounds that are normal and which ones to be concerned about. The neighbors aren't as far as it seemed and if you have some emergency/need at two in the morning, they're closer than you can imagine. I learned to shop in bulk (buy that freezer) and learned to can all the great fruits and veggies that we share. Our Volunteer Firefighters are the best! It's wonderful to walk through town and run into a few friends. Most certainly,I've learned that I never want to go back to anything close to a city. It sounds as if you are being offered a great opportunity. Check out the things the others have talked about, and follow your heart. |
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BamaSuzy
True Blue Farmgirl
138 Posts
Alabama
USA
138 Posts |
Posted - Jun 17 2005 : 8:38:10 PM
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And while you are trying to decide whether the move to the country is right for "you," make sure that even though this land seems really rural now and is surrounded by public lands that there are no restrictions, zoning, or land use ideas in place by any local or state governments that would keep you from living out your dream once you moved to the country!!!!
That is getting to be a problem in many many areas of the country!
I love living in the country and wish I was more remote!
You can bury a lot of troubles digging in the dirt! |
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JoyIowa
True Blue Farmgirl
273 Posts
Joy
273 Posts |
Posted - Jun 18 2005 : 6:42:17 PM
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Willow,
I must say I too have to admit I wish I had this decision to make.
Let me tell you a bit about my decision to move from a farm I had grown up on to New Orleans 1000 miles away from anybody. I decided my life would be more complete if I had the opportunity to live within an environment I was not comfortable with. And it was. I must say it took a long time to get used to the noise from cars, neighbors, and industry. It took an even longer time to go into my apartment without leaving the door slightly open (to aid in my escape in case someone was hiding) and looking in every closet, behind every item of furniture, etc. I'm still not sure what I would have done if I had found someone. It also took awhile to get used to waking up in the middle of the night and being able to see things.
Now about 13 years later my brother married a woman who was from a big city and brought her home to the farm. A couple of years ago she related to me how much she hated the farm when she first got there. She said it took a long time to get used to all the noise from the cows, coyotes, and even the dogs barking at night. She said she used to get home and leave the door open while she carefully inspected every inch of the house and then would run back to lock the front door in relief. By this time I am about rolling on the floor laughing as I thought "it's all a matter of perception" She went on to say how she has never gotton totally comfortable with it being dark when she wakes up at night. She did go on to say she has never regreted coming to the farm because the joy in my brother's face every morning as he looks across the fields is certainly worth a few uneasy moments of adjustments. Now she is just like the rest of us with her own special quirks (like she still can't jump a vehicle), but we love her and wouldn't trade her for a farm girl in a heartbeat. Follow your heart yes, but don't forget to give a bit of thought to the great benefits too. Good Luck! I'm rooting for you!
JoyIowa
To live without farm life is merely existing, to live with farm life is living life to it very last experience. |
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willow
Farmgirl at Heart
2 Posts
2 Posts |
Posted - Jun 18 2005 : 8:41:24 PM
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I can't thank everyone enough for all of the advice, insights, and information. You all have been very helpful and have given me lots to think about. It is really great to hear everyone's else's experience and feelings about moving to the country.
We are still considering the move . . . I'll keep you all updated.
Thanks again!!!! |
Edited by - willow on Jun 18 2005 8:42:33 PM |
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kirsten
Farmgirl in Training
10 Posts
Kirsten
Buchanan
VA
USA
10 Posts |
Posted - Jun 23 2005 : 4:30:43 PM
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| Hi - I'm Kirsten and this is my first time doing this! Yikes! I have learned this week that I have an opportunity to finally get my farm as well, so I am grateful for this topic because I am not sure how to go about this. My husband landed a job at a university near the mountains in Virginia, and the job starts in six or seven weeks. The school would provide housing very cheaply ($585 a month and no utilities) and it's a relatively rural campus. But living on a girls' campus, although there would certainly be some farmgirls, is pretty far from my farm dream. I must admit, the house available is a farmhouse, with enough room for a garden. This would allow us to have an academic year to look for what we really want. But yuck, to think of moving now and in less than a year... Also, there are farms and land available, much cheaper than where I live now. My worry is that with only six weeks til we need a home, and not being a super experienced farmer YET, would I settle for the wrong thing? I know people say to "just jump in," but I don't think they always mean financially. I have a multi-use MJFarm kind of thing in mind. I will also admit it is the first time either my husband or myself has ever had a real salary (a writer and a crafts person, you know) so I don't want to be too impulsive. I have to make my little farm financially viable relatively soon (that's the deal I made with the non-farming husband) so the pressure is sort of on. I'd appreciate any input - I loved reading what y'all wrote already, but I would love to hear more. Thanks, Kirsten |
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greyghost
True Blue Farmgirl
650 Posts
Lynn
Summerville
Georgia
USA
650 Posts |
Posted - Jun 25 2005 : 06:26:13 AM
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Oh, I would LOVE to have your choices, Kirsten and Willow!
I grew up in a city and always hated it. So I know city life isn't for me, and it's been a hobby of mine to learn about country life. My favorite thing as a little girl was to listen to grandma tell me how things were done on the farm when she was a girl.
It will take time, I am sure, to get used to the idea. I can see how all that space can be overwhelming, but as Clare said, a dog (or two) can be great reassurance. I'm home alone a lot now, I work from here and my husband is gone most of the day. The girls (my dogs) make me feel better, remind me when it is walk time, and curl up at my feet while I work at the computer. They let me know if someone or something is outside. My husband confided in me that he was happy we added a second dog, that he feels better knowing they are there, too.
Gun training is a good idea too. I haven't handled one much, but I know how to use one. ;). I also studied martial arts for 10 years and have my little stash of weapons hidden all over the house. My husband thinks this is crazy, I call it prepared.
Spend a few hours at this farm, look around, listen, and envision life. If you feel you truly wouldn't be comfortable there, then pass it by. :( Life is too short to live someplace you are not comfortable being. |
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greyghost
True Blue Farmgirl
650 Posts
Lynn
Summerville
Georgia
USA
650 Posts |
Posted - Jun 25 2005 : 06:37:31 AM
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| Oh Kirsten - a way to make the farm financially viable - there's a guy a couple miles down the road from me who has an iris and daylily farm. They don't need tons of care, just a matter of weeding and mowing between the rows, but he has all kinds of rare varieties of daylily on 5 acres. In the winter he makes furniture out of salvaged houses, and has it ready to sell in the spring. |
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hurleygirl
Farmgirl in Training
10 Posts
Heather
East Fallowfield
PA
USA
10 Posts |
Posted - Jun 30 2005 : 12:58:19 PM
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Having made the jump from big town (walking to all our entertainment, dinners out, for emergency milk and bread-with a university providing lots of cultural opportunities) out to the "boondocks", I can say, without regret, fear, or second thought, that it was the best decision for us. I was raised in a similar (country) situation but by sweetheart is a Cleveland boy-born and bred. It just is allowing me the SPACE and privacy that was so lacking from my life. I feel like I have the time to breathe, to not worry that the lawn isn't mowed on time, to look out my window and see a fawn eating breakfast in my pasture...
As for missing my former entertainment-I can still travel anywhere-my friends still all live in Philadelphia or DC-now they have a weekend retreat. Many of them laughed when we told them we bought a farm-now they just ask if they can come over
I say GO FOR IT! |
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therusticcottage
True Blue Farmgirl
4439 Posts
Kay
Vancouver
WA
USA
4439 Posts |
Posted - Jun 30 2005 : 11:14:48 PM
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Boy you guys sure give good advice! Lots of good things to consider when making the leap from city to country. And sometimes it sure feels like a big leap.
Willow -- I would take into consideration each point these wise ladies have made and do lots of research.
We moved from the city to the country in March. We are not very remote just being on the outskirts of town but we do have 5 acres. And there are wild animals, bugs, mice, and lots of different stuff to get used to. I have to admit as much as I love it has been a bit overwhelming for me. I was raised in a small farming community but am a city girl. I am used to just driving 2 blocks to go to the grocery store, make a quick run to the fabric store, etc. The town we live in doesn't have a supermarket -- only quickie marts. So that has been an adjustment too. I have to plan my "town" day so that I do my shopping, run errands, etc. And I am still afraid when it starts to get dark because it is soooooo dark in the country. I don't go outside much after dark. But the longer I'm here I know that these fears will pass too.
But would I move back to town? NEVER IN A MILLION YEARS!! Just tonight I looked out my dining room window and saw the most beautiful doe standing near the woods behind my house. And every morning I get up at 5:30, take my coffee on the front porch, and watch the hawks floating in the air. My daughter is so happy here. We have neighbors across the road who have horses and Stephanie goes over there every day. In summers past she would spend her time inside watching TV, being on the computer, etc. So far this summer I have to call her to come inside. She's out playing in the barn with the neighbor girl, etc. As time passes I will get used to the critters and the dark and it will just be second nature to me.
Really give it a lot of thought, put the pluses and minuses down on paper, and do all the research you can. If you truly don't feel comfortable then don't do it. But also don't let the fear of the unknown stop you from making a decision that could be the best one of your life.
Kay
North Clark County Farmgirls |
Edited by - therusticcottage on Jun 30 2005 11:23:56 PM |
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therusticcottage
True Blue Farmgirl
4439 Posts
Kay
Vancouver
WA
USA
4439 Posts |
Posted - Jun 30 2005 : 11:31:24 PM
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Hi Kirsten, I am in the same boat that you are!!! When we moved out here I promised my hubby (who is definitely a non-farmer -- doesn't even like to mow the lawn) that I would find some way to make up the money for the extra expenses of living out here. Either by my sewing business, getting a part-time job, or doing something with our property, or all of the above.
I know that I am not an animal person. I'm not going to raise cattle, goats, chickens, etc for profit. I am going to have a few chickens for our own eggs but that is it. So since I love to garden I am looking into raising flowers for u-pick and a flower delivery service.
Just do lots of research and take it one step at a time. You can always farm in steps -- start in one area and then expand. MJ's farm didn't get where it is overnight, ours won't either. Keep posting, we're so glad you're here.
Kay
North Clark County Farmgirls |
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Mollie
True Blue Farmgirl
88 Posts
88 Posts |
Posted - Jul 01 2005 : 06:45:49 AM
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| Kirsten, think about "herbs", they aren't quite as fussy as flowers to grow and people are wild for them in the retail market. You could contact all the restaurants in your area taking lots of "samples" and offering to provide them with fresh herbs weekly. I went to a large craft festival recently and some woman was sold out of her dried herb wreaths, especially the heart shaped ones, almost immediately. Some she put some dried roses with the herbs. She also made some swags because a lot of people like to hang them over their doorways and table centerpieces, sachets, soaps, shave soaps, hand lotions, and various seasonal items. I was stunned at the prices she was charging for some of the wreaths, $80+, and people were snatching them up. You could tell she had planned her marketing strategy, had really cute labels on the items, a cute name for her herb farm, and dressed in a vintage outfit. She had also put together gift sets for housewarming, bridal showers, kitchen, bath and body, etc. and had them wrapped so cute and very vintage looking, they were ready for giving. So think herbs, there is a ton of growing info out there if you haven't done it before. Mollie |
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connio
True Blue Farmgirl
535 Posts
connie
springtown
texas
USA
535 Posts |
Posted - Jul 02 2005 : 1:39:35 PM
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 Hey Farmgirls
Kay If you go to the Texas Dept of Ag website and look under GO TEXAN and then cutflower growing, you will find a manual that you can download. Think that most of the manual would give info that could be used in most states. Believe that it will also refer you to the Cut Flower Growers professional association.
Good luck. It is my dream to have a cut flower farm, but this will have to wait for a few years.
Connie
cozycottage |
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therusticcottage
True Blue Farmgirl
4439 Posts
Kay
Vancouver
WA
USA
4439 Posts |
Posted - Jul 03 2005 : 12:49:47 AM
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Connie -- thanks so much for the info. I'll check it out.
Kay
North Clark County Farmgirls |
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A Farm of My Own: Considering a move -- Need Opinions Please |
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Considering a move -- Need Opinions Please
