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Family Matters:  Update on my grandpa - 1/13/14  |
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FARMALLChick
True Blue Farmgirl
978 Posts
Lora
Alexandria
IN
USA
978 Posts |
 Posted - Dec 17 2013 : 09:16:33 AM
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Wasn't able to go see Grandpa this past weekend, but went the weekend before. He doesn't have the cath in anymore and is looking much better - his color looks normal instead of that funky ashen color. His crazy daughter has only been to see him one time in 3 weeks.
On Thursday, the 12th, my grandpa's neighbor found him passed out on the floor. He was rushed to the hospital in his town then they transported him to a bigger hospital in Fort Wayne. He was there until yesterday when he was admitted to a nursing home.
Our darling mother didn't go up one time to visit her own father and only called to check on him 1 time and that was AFTER my brother called her out on it.
I am thankful that the neighbor found him before it was too late - he was severely dehydrated and was passing blood. We have no idea how long he's been like that. Prior to the neighbor coming in at 9 am, the last person to have contact with him was his nephew's wife the evening before when she brought him dinner around 6 pm.
At the nursing home, the she devil refused to get him a flu shot or pneumonia shot - said he didn't need it. Now - I don't get flu shots or the like, but he's 97 and will potentially be around a lot of sick people. She did sign the DNR papers without question. When she did go in to see him in his room - she stayed for about 2 minutes then left.
We've (my brother and I)talked with the staff and let them know the backstory and that we wanted to get social services involved regarding elder abuse/neglect. They agreed and said they would do whatever they could. They also suggested that she get a mental evaluation. The admissions lady couldn't believe how bad she smelled. - it was so bad that 20 minutes after she left the lounge area - the smell was still lingering. It was awful.
Beyond all of that - I am, again, thankful that he is being cared for now and that he even seemed happy to be there. He's always said he didn't want to go to a home, but I think when everyone was paying attention to him - he realized it wasn't such a bad gig after all.
"Courage is being scared to death and saddling up anyway" -John Wayne
www.farmallchick.blogspot.com www.farmallchickphotos.blogspot.com |
Edited by - FARMALLChick on Jan 13 2014 08:10:47 AM |
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churunga
True Blue Farmgirl
3945 Posts
Marie
Minneapolis
MN
USA
3945 Posts |
Posted - Dec 17 2013 : 12:48:31 PM
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I hope you can arrange a better medical decision-maker for him. Basically, your mother would have to be declared incompetent to care for herself and others. When that happens, you and your brother can step in. Still, it all depends on the wishes of your grandfather.
Marie, Sister #5142
Try everything once and the fun things twice. |
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FARMALLChick
True Blue Farmgirl
978 Posts
Lora
Alexandria
IN
USA
978 Posts |
Posted - Dec 17 2013 : 1:04:09 PM
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Thanks, Marie - the only thing with my grandpa is he doesn't always know who people are or where he is. He can't hear well and gets confused very easily. He's stated many, many time that he doesn't trust his daughter and thinks she is only trying to get his money. All we can do is nod in agreement. Our attorney told us he would have to fire his attorney and hire a new one to get her off POA. He doesn't understand that.
"Courage is being scared to death and saddling up anyway" -John Wayne
www.farmallchick.blogspot.com www.farmallchickphotos.blogspot.com |
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hudsonsinaf
True Blue Farmgirl
3162 Posts
Shannon
Rozet
Wyoming
USA
3162 Posts |
Posted - Dec 17 2013 : 2:12:37 PM
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| Oh Lora! I am so very very sorry! I cannot even begin to imagine how difficult it is to see your grandfather in such a state - and it being your mom that is suppose to be caring for him. Praying a Christmas miracle happens for your family this year! |
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FARMALLChick
True Blue Farmgirl
978 Posts
Lora
Alexandria
IN
USA
978 Posts |
Posted - Dec 17 2013 : 2:34:31 PM
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Thanks, Shannon. I am just grateful that he is being cared for now, has help eating and drinking and has a roommate to chat with if he feels like it. He might not hear them, but he's not alone. He really did seem happy that people were fussing over him even though he said many times we needn't fuss over him. lol. It really amazes me how as we age, we start to regress to infancy again - not being able to fend/care for ourselves. No matter how much time we have left with him, I hope he remains comfortable. The staff at the nursing home said they would get him up daily and walk around a little bit so he won't get bed sores and such. He can't go to the bathroom alone because he has a catheter. I just hope he understands how to push the button for the nurse when he has to go. We showed it to him several times and explained what it was - but he would just nod. I really don't know if it clicked or not.
"Courage is being scared to death and saddling up anyway" -John Wayne
www.farmallchick.blogspot.com www.farmallchickphotos.blogspot.com |
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Family Matters: Update on my grandpa - 1/13/14 |
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Update on my grandpa - 1/13/14
