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Parenting & Farm Kids:  Is anyone else insanely overwhelmed?  |
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alterationsbyemily
True Blue Farmgirl
686 Posts
Emily
Thomasville
PA
USA
686 Posts |
 Posted - Jun 10 2011 : 3:12:25 PM
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I can sympathize the fact that you feel overwhelmed. My parents are super neat freaks and when they come to my house it has to be spotless, just like the one I grew up in. I feel that there is a happy balance between super clean and cluttered. It's your clean, and that's the way you live. I have found a few things out too, when it comes to toys, less is more, my DD is perfectly happy with her 8 stuffed animals, 4 dollies and all their clothes, and pretend kitchen. We try to invest in wooden toys too, they tend not to break and can easily go to the next child. She has two toy boxes, one downstairs and one upstairs, both are only about half full, that way if too many toys come downstairs it's easy to throw them in one box.
That only happened because mommy went of the crazy deep end one night and donated most of the small items, such as random tea sets, plastic foods, and things that just were never played with. Really take a good look at the toys and say to yourself, do I really want my child playing with that. If they see you taking it away, just tell them that it is going to children who don't have enough money for toys and giving them this toy will make them really happy. I was suprised at how well my DD reacted to this, she wanted to make other kids happy, and she started picking out toys for other kids.
As for farmgirl badges, it sounds like you have a few you can earn already. Farm Kitchen, Get it Together, Beginner, is a really simple badge to do, plus it puts you in a ready to go mood for more badges. It is very addicting to get that first badge in your email and then you want another.
Lastly, I can relate to your sister and needing to have that look from the exterior that everything is perfect. After going on debt counseling, my DH and I had to really put our foot in our mouth. Before, everything came from a box, from a pretty lighted store. Now we understand sales, couponing, and garage sales. How else can I buy a complete summer wardrobe for my DD for $5. My parents who do not do any of that get the sunday paper, never read it and throw the coupons out. I actually mailed them envelopes and every week my mom sends her coupons. I have sat my dad down, showing him my savings because of coupons and he was puzzled at how I could do it. For some people, they just don't understand the Farmgirl lifestyle. Numerous times when I am visiting my mom has told her friends over the phone about how she is sick of hearing about crop rotation and milking goats. She just doesn't get it, my dad likes to hear about it but really never invests in the conversation. (And he wonders why his plants get sicker every year in the same location as the last 5 years!)
I hope you find my post helpful and same with BarnChick, if you want a good old fashioned pen pal message me, I have a 4 year old and one due in 6 weeks (DS).
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Farmgirl #2951
Currently renting-farmgirl wannabe |
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LouisvilleMom
True Blue Farmgirl
246 Posts
Kathryn
Louisville
KY
USA
246 Posts |
Posted - Jul 07 2011 : 09:26:01 AM
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Insanely overwhelmed does not describe it. I have four boys ages 12-6and they are all slobs. The youngest is special needs and has destroyed several thousand dollars worth of stuff in the past week or so. My house is in a state of remodel so we can sell and move to acreage. The garage is full of flooring so the kids bikes are in the house! The stress is so high I feel like I am drowning.
SAHM mom to four great boys.
http://ksfarnsworth.blogspot.com/ |
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MagnoliaWhisper
True Blue Farmgirl
2817 Posts
Heather
Haysville
Kansas
USA
2817 Posts |
Posted - Jul 07 2011 : 2:29:29 PM
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*hugs* Kathryn. That's why we had to get out of NYC and to the country. I don't care if we live in a one room shack, as long as we have some acreage. I'm a strong believer in keeping the kids outside!
My parents/grandparents kept us kids outside my whole growing up. We found plenty of interesting things to do outside, and loved being outside. And I think that's probably the secret to how they kept the house reasonably picked up! We didn't have a lot of toys outside either, we played tag, used the old propane tank (for the house) to play as a horse, played hide and go seek in the corn field, dug in the dirt, made mud pies, and sand castles, etc. I about went insane cooped up in the apartment with all the "stuff" kids need when they can barely go outside to play! UHG.
http://www.heathersprairie.blogspot.com |
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Lanna
True Blue Farmgirl
330 Posts
Lanna
A little town in Idaho
330 Posts |
Posted - Jul 10 2011 : 3:16:08 PM
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Yup, what they said.
First, if the IL's are so picky about their grandchildren's house being so clean, they can clean it themselves, or offer to hire someone for you. If not, they can just chill about it.
I do that with so, so many things. Like when I was pregnant - I had many, many people ask me whether it was a boy or a girl, every time. We didn't even get ultrasounds with the last three, we didn't really care about the sex as long as babe was happy and healthy. So to those that were extra insistent, I held out my hand, told them ultrasounds are about $300 nowadays, and if they were willing to pay I'd think about it. I never had a taker. 
Second, having little kids is a season we eventually grow out of (so I'm told), and the early years are just full of messes every which way. I still totally struggle with that, fwiw. Add in that we homeschool the whirling dervishes and hubby works from home in the basement, we're always home. Our house gets used, and then some.
Just focus on the important things - your children and husband (and God if you're spiritual in that regard). Other things will fall into place. Including badges if you so desire.
Just so you know I'm not totally blowing sunshine up the nether regions, my kids are 7.5yo, 5yo, 3yo and 16mo. My hubby was working out of town most of last year, leaving me almost a single (pregnant) mom of 3, then a mostly single mom of 4. With our house on the market. During gardening and canning season. Yup, you bet I ended up with PPD. It's slowly gotten better, and right now I'm only on here to look up a chillover jam recipe since I have 48 pounds of strawberries in my house to put up for the year.  In between nursing the newborn and warning Grandpa and the kids not to step on my tomato plants and making lunch and dinner for everybody and so on. 
And as they get older (and not eat the hot glue stick) you'll be able to do a few more things. Or at least leave the kids upstairs with the hubby and lock yourself downstairs in the craft corner and catch up on a few unfinished projects. In one of my mom's groups, we had monthly craft nights at someone's house - no kids, adult conversation, catching up on scrapbooks or card making or hand-sewing or whatever. Once the kids aren't attached to you as much (my 16mo is still nursing, a lot) it gets easier.
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Lanna, mama to three little monkeys and growing a new little sprout - born at home in a creative place Feb 2010 |
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FarmDream
True Blue Farmgirl
1085 Posts
Julie
TX
USA
1085 Posts |
Posted - Jul 13 2011 : 11:16:31 PM
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This thread sure has a lot of great laughs. I've done FlyLady also. I've slacked off and need to get back into it. We also have a lot good intentions but then they start to slide and then disappear. I used to make lists of everything to get done for a day but now I'm using a new system. I do one load of laundry and one load of dishes per day. I take on one household/yard project that I work on for an hour at most. Longer if it's something I'm enjoying. If needed I'll do one trip to town. Some days I'll work on some business stuff. I get the 5 yr old to help with cleaning house because almost all the clutter and mess is her stuff. I have a habit of putting my things back where they belong so I don't have to clean it up. I even started a time limit for her to clean. We have a small table and I pile her stuff on it and tell her if it isn't put away by bedtime then it's going straight to the outside garbage can. I've only thrown away 1 doll hair curler. And I make time in the evening to work on knitting or sewing while watching a movie.
~FarmDream is Farmgirl Sister #3069
Live Today, Cherish Yesterday, Dream Tomorrow
http://naturaljulie.etsy.com
http://julie-rants.blogspot.com |
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Montrose Girl
Farmgirl Legend/Schoolmarm
1360 Posts
Laurie
Montrose
CO
1360 Posts |
Posted - Jul 14 2011 : 08:48:09 AM
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My child isn't here yet and I"m nuts! He's not due until Oct, but the garden weeds, because it is a new garden, leaves me in a quandry where to even start. There are days I look around and all the projects I would like to do on top of the housework and garden and I just don't know where to start. I'm sure some of it is the pregnancy, but the weeds. A solid week of rain has not helped and the sheer size. Hubby helps a little but he's pretty busy with the orchard, so I can't drag him away from that without something there then falling behind.
Ok, just needed to vent a little. One row at a time.
Laurie
http://www.inntheorchardbnb.com/ |
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MagnoliaWhisper
True Blue Farmgirl
2817 Posts
Heather
Haysville
Kansas
USA
2817 Posts |
Posted - Jul 14 2011 : 10:12:26 PM
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I know we got rain for a week and literally some of the weeds came from no where and grew as tall as me. I literally fell over trying to pull one of them! Yet my babies (seedlings I planted) are just barely steady growing, after months, yet in a week a weed can be as tall as me! I don't understand it! lol hahaha
http://www.heathersprairie.blogspot.com |
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Montrose Girl
Farmgirl Legend/Schoolmarm
1360 Posts
Laurie
Montrose
CO
1360 Posts |
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Farmer Judy
True Blue Farmgirl
433 Posts
Judy
North Aurora
IL
USA
433 Posts |
Posted - Jul 21 2011 : 10:13:00 AM
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To Laurie, if you have access to some paper, even the balck and white newspaper (not the colored pages) shred it up around the plants and put some manure around it. When you water it the manure will feed your plants and the paper will keep the weeds down.
I have three kids DD 22 #1DS 15 and #2DS13 and of course my DH. None of them want to help in the yard, even mowing can be a fight. DD only does what I exactly ask her to do and #2DS has aspergers and wants to help but usually I need to follow him and keep things in order. I work full time as the only breadwinner and occationally DD will have a temp job. Grades in school are doodoo and I'm just tired. BTW, I'm also 50 and already doing the change. I love my kids and unasked for hugs and kisses make my day but boy do some of those days seem really long.
My relief, and better than a shrink, is my gardens. Yes it is multiple. I have a 25 X 40 plot at work and 23 X 26 at home. I am hopeing to cut the food bill for a while with all the goodies I can free, can or dry from the gardens. In the cool months I crochet for a cancer group, make a few things for the family and am working at getting better at quilting.
After we lost out house we rented a house with all hardwood floors which really has helped with the cleaning and all of our allergies. We have cut down (only the bedrooms now) on blinds that need to be cleaned.
Good luck to Megan who started this thread, it does get better, at one time I had my immediate family I had both my mother and mother-in-law living with us. Everything gets better in time. Enjoy what you can, find help for what you can't, and pray in between. |
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Parenting & Farm Kids: Is anyone else insanely overwhelmed? |
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Is anyone else insanely overwhelmed?
