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Here's to Your Health: Infertility ![Next Topic Next Topic](icons/icon_go_right.gif) |
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Jaime
Farmgirl in Training
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20 Posts
Indiana
USA
20 Posts |
Posted - Jun 20 2006 : 09:27:56 AM
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Hello All! I rarely post, but I lurk here quite often. My husband & I are dealing with infertility issues and I just wanted to see if any of you had any advice on the matter. A little background info: I am 28 and DH is 31. We have been married for 7 years. We started trying last August and I quickly found out that my periods were few and far between. After several trips to the Dr I found out that I have Poly Cytic Overy Syndrome (PCOS). Quite common from what I understand. Anyway, I have cysts on my overies and there's no way to tell when I ovulate-if I even do-because of the length of my cycles. I am currently on day 82 of my cycle! AGH! We haven't even been trying a year yet, but it is so frustrating! My Dr wants me to go have an HSG done, but I have to wait until I can afford it since my insurance won't cover it. To top it off, my brother and his wife just found out they are expecting. (They've only been married for 4 months!) Do any of you have any suggestions on how to cope? Thanks for listening!
Jaime
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sunshine
True Blue Farmgirl
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4877 Posts
Wendy
Utah
USA
4877 Posts |
Posted - Jun 20 2006 : 09:53:11 AM
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I misscarried twice before I gave birth to my first child. I was told never to have kids by my doctor as it could kill me and almost did three times. It was real hard for me because after I miscarried for the second time we where having an extended family dinner and a brother in law stated that he would never marry a woman who couldn't have kids. My loving husband put his hand under the table and just let me squeeze as hard as I could so I wouldn't kill ( figuatively of course) my brother in law. Latter my husband took me a side and said we knew it was going to be hard to have biological kids But that didn't matter because I was not less of a woman to him. If we adopted that was fine with him as long as we raised them they where ours. My husbands best friend married a woman who couldn't have kids also and has a dopted a child his brother did the same thing and married a woman who couldn't have kids and they have adopted three kids. Those kids know they are adopted and know that they where choosen by their parents because there parents wanted them and loved them. very well ajusted familys. We have three daughters and stopped because of me almost hemraggging to death three times figured it was better to raise the kids I have than risk dieing and my children having to be raised alone by a single dad. No desicion is right or wrong we all do what we can. Gods gifts do not have to come out of our own bodies and if they do they are not differnet than a kid that is adopted both should be loved and cherished as the special spirit child of God who has granted us the oportunity to raise them. I don't know if this helps. I understand my brother in law who said he would never marry a woman who could not have kids but it was very annoying to me for a long time as they had a honey moon baby litterly, long before I did at 4 years into my marriage so I put up with that for a long time. It is still a bit of a rift to me. The main reason being he beleives that the more children the better even if you cna't afford to pay for their births or their medical needs. Where as I believe children are a gift and you should be as ready as possible and not burdon others with your bills. I have three daughters who each cost as much as an expensive car to give birth to. He has 5 children who all together cost less to give birth to ( out of his pocket ) than one of my house payments. I feel bad when cousions see my kids and ask why they have nice cloths and they don't. What is more frustrating when I try to give him nice cloths for his two little girls that are smaller than mine. He tells me they have enough cloths and thay are fine and won't take them. Drives me nuts because we live in Utah snow land and I watch my neices go to school in the middle of winter with windbreakers not coats and holely thin pants not nice thick jeans and things like that. He would rather his kids wear thead bear see through clothes that are from the 60's than brand new clothes that have lots of use left. My point is do what is best for your family Right now that is you and your husband. Make sure that relationship is strong so no matter what the outcome of children adopted or natural you have each other.
have a lovely day |
Edited by - sunshine on Jun 20 2006 11:19:24 AM |
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Tina Michelle
True Blue Farmgirl
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6948 Posts
Tina
sunshine state
FL
USA
6948 Posts |
Posted - Jun 20 2006 : 10:50:16 AM
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I was told the same things during my experiences..first it was ovarian cysts(at one point up to 15 cysts on one ovary and about 9 on the other..full of the cysts), then polycystic ovarian syndrome, then possibly endometriosis, although the latter was never confirmed only stated "possibly" then to where they wanted to do a partial wedge removal of both ovaries to which I opted out of and said no..a wise choice on my part......of course I had my first child at age 22 got pregnant 5 months into the marriage..then there was a 9 yr gap wherein the dr's were telling me these things ..I'd be lucky to have any more, etc, etc. Before becoming pregnant with my second child they wanted to start me on infertility clinic sessions..I decided to lose a little weight..this always does seem to help my cycle..being that I was overweight..so if you are overweight..do try to lose a bit..as the poly cystic syndrome is more linked with being overweight ..although not always the case..but more common in those that are overweight..then I read that taking a tablespoon of pure apple cider vinegar daily helps with fertility(the unfiltered pure kind with the sediment in it..found at health food stores)..this I did on a daily basis..and I also took a herbal called damiana that is also good for helping to regulate the female cycle. I did this for about 5-6 months and wound up pregnant..of course too there was lots and lots of prayer involved..I understand well the frustrations of wanting a biological child..I agree though with the statements above..that whatever method works for you in the end..be it finally able to concieve or adoption..Love is the key...anyhow..I did want to chime in and let you know what seemed to help in my situation..I now have 3 children..the last one was born just 22 months ago..a 4 yr. gap between those two and a 9 yr. gap between the first 2 children...so anything is possible really. I also encourage you to seek out a polycystic ovarian syndrome support group online..there is alot of information out there...the best of wishes to you.
~Seize the Day! Live, Love, Laugh~ |
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ThymeForEweFarm
True Blue Farmgirl
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705 Posts
Robin
An organic farm in the forest in
Maine
USA
705 Posts |
Posted - Jun 20 2006 : 10:58:53 AM
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There's a med that will make your period start. I can't think of the name off the top of my head. It will come to me and when it does, I'll post it. I've been through PCOS, four years of infertility treatments, endometriosis, medications, three surgeries and a LOT of money. I wouldn't start with HSG. There are simpler steps and other things to try. I think it's the worst thing I did while going through treatments. I'd take the surgeries (knock me out and wake me up when you're done!) over HSG any day. It does increase your chance of conceiving the month you have it done but since you're not ovulating on a regular basis there's probably not of an increase for you. My specialist started me on the drug to make my period start, then Clomid to make me ovulate, wait for period to not come, blood test to be sure I wasn't pregnant, drug to make my period start, then Clomid, repeat. Repeat. Repeat. Once you start ovulating regularly your chances of conception should go way up. If your husband hasn't been checked he should be. It would be awful to get yourself straightened out and find out months later that he has a low count or something else.
http://www.medicinenet.com/script/main/srchcont.asp?src=infertility&op=mm Lots of info here.
What a flood of memories this brings back. My BIL and his wife put off telling us they were expecting. The whole infertility thing is difficult for couples, their family and friends. We didn't tell anyone for a long time.
I can't say don't get discouraged or keep a sense of humor (but if you want a giggle I can tell you some stories privately) or anything else. I know better. What I can say is learn as much as you possibly can on your own so that you can make decisions about your treatment with your doctor. Don't wait. You have real problems that will drag this out if you aren't aggressive about treating them. Every month left untreated is a missed chance and God knows how important those chances are when you're in this situation.
We did finally get pregnant. She just turned 13. Have you noticed a half million babies and pregnant women since you started trying? They seem to come out of the woodwork. And the folks who mean well but say, "You're trying to hard. Just relax." Or the worst, "I wish I had that problem. I got pregnant every time he looked at me." Honestly - people said that to me. Smacking them isn't advisable even after the 100th time no matter how much better it would make you feel. I don't think people mean any harm, they just don't know what to say.
Good luck. I hope this works out easily and quickly for you.
Robin www.thymeforewe.com
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KarenP
True Blue Farmgirl
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666 Posts
Karen
Chippewa Falls
Wisconsin
USA
666 Posts |
Posted - Jun 20 2006 : 4:15:00 PM
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Jaime, I have the June copy of ALTERNATIVE MEDICINE, there is a special section on FERTILITY. If your interested, e-mail me privately your address and I'll copy it for you. KarenP
"Purest Spring Water in the World" |
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akcowgirl
True Blue Farmgirl
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296 Posts
Valerie
Homer
Alaska
USA
296 Posts |
Posted - Jun 20 2006 : 9:53:25 PM
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Jaime, My best friend has PCOS and i know how she struggles with it. it is a very hard thing and not one a whole lot of people know about. Please look into getting this book: The Savvy Woman's Guide to PCOS: The Many Faces Of A 21st Century Epidemic... And What You Can Do About It. By Elizabeth Lee Vliet It helped her alot in understanding many things about the syndrome. ((hugs))
Valerie Yes, I live in my own little world. But that's ok they know me here. Deja Moo: The feeling that you've heard this bull before.
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Edited by - akcowgirl on Jun 20 2006 9:53:59 PM |
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CityCat
True Blue Farmgirl
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198 Posts
Catherine
Toronto
Ontario
Canada
198 Posts |
Posted - Jun 20 2006 : 10:58:05 PM
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Ovarian cysts run in my family. My mom and all of her three sisters have had them. I've got them too, and I've had to have 2 surgeries to remove overgrown cysts. Unfortunately, in the second surgery, one ovary had to be removed.
Now, I'm not trying to have children, but I can sympathize and some times knowing others are getting through okay can help. It also scares me a little when I think of the potential problems that may arise when I do want to have children. But in my case, what's the sense of worrying about maybes? Wishing you the good ovulating and I'm sending good thoughts your way. -Cat |
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dargaonfly1054
True Blue Farmgirl
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257 Posts
Georgette
Nicholville
NY
USA
257 Posts |
Posted - Jun 21 2006 : 03:55:22 AM
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My daughter seems to be having the same problem you describe. She gets cysts and gets really sore on which ever side the cyst is on. Anyway, I had endometriosis (spell?) and I couldn't get pregnant, my (then) husband and I applied for adoption and got accepted. I had surgery to have the endometriosis removed and my doctor said to hurry up and try to get pregnant or it would grow back. I did and I got pregnant. I had three children. So I guess I'm one of the lucky ones. That is my experience. My thoughts and prayers are with you. I hope things turn out the way you wish for.
Georgette
"There is a voice that doesn't use words........Listen." |
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Here's to Your Health: Infertility ![Next Topic Next Topic](icons/icon_go_right.gif) |
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