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Parenting & Farm Kids:  nursing  |
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MagnoliaWhisper
True Blue Farmgirl
2817 Posts
Heather
Haysville
Kansas
USA
2817 Posts |
 Posted - Jul 19 2010 : 12:27:07 PM
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Ok, my oldest is 3 years old almost 4. She was born tongue tied, and no amount of me begging drs to clip her tongue or help me get her to latch worked. I tried to get LCs but they would only "talk" to me, they would not actually help me-as in they didn't even want to SEE my daughter, let alone touch her. They never seen my daughter at all-never laid eyes on her, only wanted to talk me through it, and that wasn't working! I needed some hands on. Any way, point being she never latched, and I pumped milk for her for 2 1/2 years!
DD is now 4 months old. She was born preemie and they told me she was too weak to get all she needed on her own when first born. I have had her at the breast every day of her life though, even when the NICU nurses would tell me it was pointless, etc.
Well, now I'm quite sure she can get milk all on her own. I've been pumping 8 times a day till last week when I started making her nurse for all her needs, and then I would just pump a little after each of her feedings.
Any way, last week was pretty bad with the temper tantrums, she had gotten so used to the bottle, she wasn't a happy camper about only getting to nurse.
But, by and large she is doing great now.
Then Saturday my MIL came to pick up the 3 year old for the day. She went on and on, about why not keep her on a bottle, after all now she will be attached to me all the time. Yeah, what's wrong with that? What if you end up sick and in the hospital then what? We'll deal with that IF that was to happen, but if it happened then she could be brought to me at the hospital, I would guess. No you wouldn't want her there she could get sick, etc etc. Well, why worry about that since there is no reason to think I would get so sick I would be in the hospital any way, and that's not happened yet?
BTW, when I first had my 3 year old she would call every day from the store, which formula do you want me to buy? None, she is getting breast milk. But, she needs used to formula for in case something happens to you she will be used to drinking formula. Well, she's only getting breast milk. We don't want formula! She ended up buying a ton of formula which we would just throw away!
She's also made comments that it would be fine if I died cause then she could raise my children. UHG!
Any way, her latest was, she told my husband she was here three hours Saturday, when in actuality she was only here one hour, and that the baby cried the whole time, and I was abusing her by not giving her a bottle. She cried for a few minutes cause she was tired and sleeping and MIL woke her up! She was not crying cause of need of a bottle!
MIL has also told my husband I am abusing her cause my nipples are too big to breast feed and are choking the baby. The baby nevers acts choked or coughing etc. It's all ludicrous!
And I'm at my brink.
Thankfully a friend told me about the Womanly Art of Breastfeeding, I bought it and read every word. I love it. Sadly my MIL has said every single one of the things in there it says not to say to a nursing mom plus some of her own stuff!
What's more she is a nurse, and her family looks up to her as a nurse and she has gotten many of them to stop nursing their children because of her "expertise".
My mom is a dr and dad is a RN (MIL is only a LPN, not putting down LPN's but there is a lot more training and schooling with DR and RN), they do nothing but encourage me to continue. Yet, they live half a country away-in Kansas, and I live in NYC. And all I have around here is my inlaws.
I tried to contact my local LLL but that was almost a month ago and I still haven't heard back from them about when their meetings are.
I just wish I could get some kind of local support, not just the spurts I get over the phone from my family. Makes me sick my MIL is so anti nursing. I mean, every one has a right to their own opinions, and she doesn't have to support me, just keep her mouth shut would be nice enough!
http://www.heathersprairie.blogspot.com |
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1badmamawolf
True Blue Farmgirl
2199 Posts
Teresa
"Bent Fence Farms"
Ca
USA
2199 Posts |
Posted - Jul 19 2010 : 12:48:43 PM
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Wow, I am so very sorry that your MIL treats you this way, and I truely hope hubby is not taking her side against you. I think I would bar this women from my home/life until she learns to mind her own business. I just don't know what else to say, good luck...
"Treat the earth well, it was not given to you by your parents, it was loaned to you by your children" |
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Lessie Louise
True Blue Farmgirl
1406 Posts
Carol
PECULIAR
MO
USA
1406 Posts |
Posted - Jul 19 2010 : 3:08:33 PM
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Keep trying the LLL. I am proud of the way you continue to breast feed, DO NOT listen to your MIL. Once, my mil made me go into a public restroom to nurse. I sat in there, listening to toliets flush, and thought She (mil) wouldn't eat in here, and out I went. And I made sure I flashed her every time I offered baby the breast! She was convinced The kids would die of starvation, and my goodness, they were still nursing at over a year of age. She thought that was just awful.
You have done such a good job getting that premie to nurse, you keep going. That is the best thing for that baby. Karen Pryor has a good breastfeeding book out also. Good job!!
Forget buns of steel, I'd rather have buns of cinnamon!
Don't out smart your common sense!!
Farmgirl #680! |
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MagnoliaWhisper
True Blue Farmgirl
2817 Posts
Heather
Haysville
Kansas
USA
2817 Posts |
Posted - Jul 19 2010 : 7:52:41 PM
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Thanks Gals.
Thank God my husband is on my side and sticks up for me. She also can't stand that we cloth diaper. In fact, DD1 has been potty trained for a looooooong time, and she still wants to put her in pull ups when she comes over, I think it's just to spite me because she knows I don't like those chemicals on my daughter. My daughter leaves in panties and comes home in pull ups. My MIL told my husband, it's because she doesn't want DD to be on the toilet and touch it and get germs.....so she would rather a almost 4 y.o. to go in their pants??????? psychotic in my opinion. Plus it makes it hard when DD comes home. She almost always has a accident when she comes home the first few hours. Even though no accidents for weeks when she doesn't go visit MIL. UHG! I told my husband it's cause she's confused that MIL wants her to go in her pants, and we want her on the potty!
http://www.heathersprairie.blogspot.com |
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MagnoliaWhisper
True Blue Farmgirl
2817 Posts
Heather
Haysville
Kansas
USA
2817 Posts |
Posted - Jul 19 2010 : 7:55:22 PM
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oh yeah, BTW we plan on nursing way past a year! lol WHO says they should have breast milk at least 2 years. And many countries go on till like 7 years old! 4 is I think the world wide average.
http://www.heathersprairie.blogspot.com |
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Alee
True Blue Farmgirl
22941 Posts
Alee
Worland
Wy
USA
22941 Posts |
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MagnoliaWhisper
True Blue Farmgirl
2817 Posts
Heather
Haysville
Kansas
USA
2817 Posts |
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Alee
True Blue Farmgirl
22941 Posts
Alee
Worland
Wy
USA
22941 Posts |
Posted - Jul 19 2010 : 9:31:05 PM
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I know- but sometimes you have to use the shock treatment if hints and nice words aren't getting through.
In all reality I am sure her "helpfulness" is probably with good intent...but misguided- at least for your family. I know some people that formula was their only way but I was glad that Nora was a breastfed baby. It made our lives a lot easier!
Alee
Farmgirl Sister #8
www.awarmheart.com
www.farmgirlalee.blogspot.com
www.allergyjourneys.blogspot.com
Put your pin on the farmgirl map! www.farmgirlmap.blogspot.com |
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drag0nfly
Farmgirl in Training
10 Posts
sally
buckley
mi
USA
10 Posts |
Posted - Jul 20 2010 : 05:16:55 AM
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Hahaha.. Heather.. hugs to you.. Its been awhile since i was in LLL.. but our group consisted of a lot of homebirth moms and other types of "earth mothers". A lot of us cloth diapered, and one of my girlfriends nursed her daughter till she started kindergarden. hahah.. We used to all sit around and shock each other with stories of vocal opposition we would get from family, co-workers, etc. It was quite comical sometimes, inspite of being exhausted with dealing with it. What else can you do, but laugh? right? haha. love ya.. keep up the good work. you are an awesome mom!
XOXO
Sally |
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drag0nfly
Farmgirl in Training
10 Posts
sally
buckley
mi
USA
10 Posts |
Posted - Jul 20 2010 : 05:21:09 AM
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| oh... BTW... my son was tongue tied.. (it runs in both sides of our family).. i used to work for a dentist and i just had him laser it apart.. no anesthetic or anything.. it was a cinch! he didnt even cry. we did it just after his 3rd birthday. My twin sister, on the other hand, had a tied tongue all the way to the tip (the most severe i've ever seen, even working many years in dentistry).. .she didn't have hers clipped until she was married! Your babe should be fine. I don't think it's necessary to clip it, some people think it helps speech delay and latch problems, shrug.. but i dont know.. kids adapt i think. still, i'm surprised you can't find a dentist to cut that or laser that for you, if thats what you want to do. |
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Ingrid
True Blue Farmgirl
432 Posts
Ingrid
BC
Canada
432 Posts |
Posted - Jul 20 2010 : 07:26:19 AM
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Not to be harsh but tell your mother in law to mind her own business. Nicely of course at first and if that doesn't work not so nicely. Nursing is the most wonderful way to start a child off and is so beneficial. It takes dedication and a lot of time to nurse but it makes our children so much healthier. Just be a tough mom and do what's best for your children.
Give thanks to yourself everyday for all the wonderful things you do! |
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knittingmom
True Blue Farmgirl
665 Posts
AnneMarie
Edmonton
Alberta
Canada
665 Posts |
Posted - Jul 20 2010 : 10:49:12 AM
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I am so sorry that your MIL is undermining your instinct and authority. You need to get your DH on track here and make sure he is backing YOU. He may not want to deal with this confrontational mother but you are his wife and these are your children and he has to tell her to back off.
You know what is best for your baby she has no right to push you otherwise and those comments she's made are way over line. I'm sorry that your family isn't closer.
How about the hospital or your family doctor's office for referals for breastfeeding help/questions. They may know of a local facilitator explain to them that you have contacted LLL repeatdly and they are not returning your calls. In my city we have public health clinics (just staffed by RNs), I'm not sure if you have something similar in the states but I know that these units are a wealth of knowledge and they will help you if baby is having latch issues, etc.
Hugs, we're all thinking of you.
"There is no foot so small that it cannot leave an imprint on this world" |
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KanMogirl
True Blue Farmgirl
349 Posts
Katherine
Rock
Kansas
USA
349 Posts |
Posted - Jul 20 2010 : 12:07:08 PM
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MY MIL thought I should bottle feed after having trouble with sore nipples, thrush, or jaundice with my three daughters but I continued after getting the problem solved. I nursed them 8 months, 9 months, and 1 year. Luckily my mil didn't give me too much grief. Its too bad your hospital did not have a nurse trained to deal with nursing. With my first child, my Lamaze instructor helped with my sore nipples. Just before coming home, my daughter one night could not be satisfied so I ended up with sore nipples. I was able to descreetly nurse in public with my oldest two. I had more trouble with my youngest because she wanted to nuzzle and play before latching on. My children were not sick alot and I think it was because I breastfed them.
Good luck!
I would rather wear out than rust out.----Richard Cumberland |
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MagnoliaWhisper
True Blue Farmgirl
2817 Posts
Heather
Haysville
Kansas
USA
2817 Posts |
Posted - Jul 20 2010 : 1:25:19 PM
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Thanks gals.
Thankfully my husband does step in, but she is very hmmm, forceful and well personally I feel she has learning disabilities. Getting through to her is almost impossible some times.
Yeah I was born tongue tied and it wasn't clipped till I was 8 years old, I had speech impediment from it, because it was all the way to the tip too. I still can't put out my tongue (won't go past my lips). I was able to at least be understood after the clipping.
I didn't know dentist did that. I know a lovely dentist that would probably do it, but he's in Kansas! UHG! here in NYC they won't see children under 5! They say children under 5 don't need dental! I started seeing a dentist at 18 months old in Kansas. So it's really weird!
And yeah the hospital had nothing when I had my first daughter. They had a LC but, my daughter was in NICU (both my daughters were preemie), and she would not go into the NICU with me at all. This last time though there was special NICU LC's and she was helpful with DD2, slightly! lol Some things she did traumatized Belle for a while and took me a lot of coaxing to get her over-IE showing me a breast compression with out any warning to me, and choking poor Belle. I would of never had her show me a breast compression while Belle was actually nursing and NOT needing it! As 1 since I pumped for 2 1/2 years for my first, I did know what a breast compression was as I often did that to try to increase my milk production. And 2. we were at the beginning of the nursing session where the milk was flowing strong enough for Belle as it was, she didn't need to be overwhelmed by it! She was scared of that breast for weeks after that!
I know it sounds silly or unbelievable, but my children have very good memories from baby hood, I know my oldest is always telling me stories about when-and sometimes it was years ago and she's only 3! So she would of only been a baby. She does always say it was yesterday though, and I have to rack my brain to remember what she is even talking about. But, I also have babyhood memories-I shock my mom often when I bring up something that happened with I was less then 1 year old, IE one day I said something about the color of my room when I was a baby, and the decor. I didn't know I had to of only been like 6 months old at the time, I just knew I was little, mom and dad moved around a lot because of the military. So she knew of the room I was talking about, but said we had moved from there by the time I was 6 months old and couldn't believe I could remember it. I told her, I just remember looking at the decor for what seemed like forever, waiting for her to come and get me in the mornings! haha
So yeah, the trauma with the breast compression went on for a while with DD2, as I could tell she was scared every time I put her on that side and she would scream and cry. I kept putting her on it though and tried to reassure her it wouldn't happen again. lol Poor thing!
http://www.heathersprairie.blogspot.com |
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AmethystRose
True Blue Farmgirl
254 Posts
Rosemary
Huntingdon
PA
USA
254 Posts |
Posted - Jul 20 2010 : 3:56:34 PM
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Heather, I faithfully read The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding twenty(!)years ago while pregnant. It was the most comforting book that I had. Maybe LLL has something online.
I had a "perfect" MIL also. HER kids were toilet trained in the womb. She didn't breastfeed, but I think that she was jealous that I did. After some years I learned not to be in a room alone with her, because she reported conversations that never happened. |
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MagnoliaWhisper
True Blue Farmgirl
2817 Posts
Heather
Haysville
Kansas
USA
2817 Posts |
Posted - Jul 20 2010 : 6:21:07 PM
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I love the Womanly Art of Breastfeeding. Oddly enough my friend suggested it to me only days before the latest one's release so I was able to get it for a 40% discount by "pre-ordering". I literally read it from cover to cover the first day. It's a AWESOME book!
My MIL is the same Rosemary, I'm learning I too shouldn't be in the same room alone. The baby shower was a nightmare with her! Let's put it this way-she stole over 100 dollars from the cards given to us......she didn't pay for the baby shower either, my husband and I did......so um...why did she take our gift money? I don't know! I just bring up the baby shower cause I wasn't alone much with her there, but the few minutes I was it was insane!
What makes me the maddest about all her "advice" is she didn't raise my husband! She had him, she breastfed him for 2 months then she says she got sick and had to be on antibiotics, so she took him to her MIL (husband's grandmother) and left him. They came back for him, when he went to high school! Yeah he lived with his grandparents from 2 months to high school, cause she got the flu? Any way..she said they liked to dance and do other things, that's why they never came back for him. they were teens when they had him. But, still. Any way...then my husband said when they came back for him, they all the sudden wanted all this respect, and him to be just a certain way, and would be abusive with him when he wasn't! In fact it was so bad, I met one of his teachers one day at the store. It was a old Math teacher. I did not bring up anything about his parents at all! The Math teacher did! He said, how is your mom? Vince said ok. Then the math teacher went on to tell me, how something was wrong with my MIL, she was never proud of my husband. And he would tell her what a good student and good boy over all that Vince was and how she should be so proud of him. And she would just be like, yeah what ever.
I have never met a teacher who actually thought a mom didn't show enough pride in her child! I think that says a whole lot about her.
When we told her we ran into the teacher and that he said to say hello, and how much he liked Vince, etc. She said, yeah well he's a homosexual.
Um....no he isn't, come to find out he lives in the same apartments we do (huge co-op second largest in the world!) and has a wife and kids. And even if he was a homosexual, so what?
Any way...this is what I am up against. Just insanity!
My mom's friend who is a oh, can't think right now I had a head ache, but any way she helps home birth deliveries. She came up after I had DD2 to help me a bit. And she barely had to deal or see MIL, but the few minutes she did said, I was not being treated right at all. And that it wasn't right the things she was saying to me in front of her. I said, she's been on good behavior in front of you, I thought she had been acting good compared to usual! My mom's friend couldn't believe it! My mom's friend did throw her some zingers though! lol IE when we went to church, and my MIL asked me for a burp cloth, I gave her one, then she asked if it was clean. My mom's friend said no, she gave you one she put on the floor rubbed around, wiped her shoes on and then decided to give it to you. My MIL just looked at her. Mom's friend just smiled. lol haha She didn't get that mom's friend was being sarcastic. lol
any way thank god I only have to take it for a few more months. We are moving, far far away in October!
http://www.heathersprairie.blogspot.com |
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EarthMamaJEM
Farmgirl in Training
38 Posts
Jenn
PA
USA
38 Posts |
Posted - Jul 20 2010 : 7:07:31 PM
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I agree, keep up with LLL. I am so close to being a leader so I feel I have a lot of experience to offer, please email me *any time*.
My younger 2 were tongue tied, the first we had snipped by an ENT at 5 months and the 2nd to be was at 3ish months. I have nursed all my kids, the older 2 weaned at a wee bit over 4 and the younger 2 are still going strong despite having to position them a certain way for them to get a good latch. Can your ped give you a referral to an ENT? Can you call around to find somebody to do it? If you are familiar with Mothering.com , go to their website and the "find your tribe" section (I am no longer a member there, but was for a short time...now I just read the magazine) and ask on there too.
And you can tell your MIL that my 4 children have never gotten a drop of formula and we all survived.  Her generation were told lots of lies about their bodies being inadiquate to nurish their babies. It has upset me in the past when my mother or MIL or other older women I know have gotten rude to me about nursing but I try to remember this because back then, drs were gods and they were but weak women who couldnt do anything w/o the help of drs or a man. 
I am Jenn. Wife to A, mama to S, B, L and V.
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Lovely Rita Milk Maid
Farmgirl at Heart
4 Posts
RoseRita
Chicago
IL
USA
4 Posts |
Posted - Sep 02 2010 : 5:38:40 PM
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Your work breastfeeding is amazing.
Congratulations on all you have accomplished btwn the tongue-tie and preemie birth.
Your mother in law is wrong, and you know that, please go in with mama bear intution blaring when you deal with her, always. That is something I have had to do with my own mil (she has suggested things like feeding my children PET milk with Karo syrup over breastmilk, and fed my twins McDonalds ice cream when they were 4 months old, lactose intolerant and not eating ANY food yet...I still can't believe my babies' first food was MickieD's ice cream...I swear we only left for 2 hours!) It's so bad, I can actually laugh about it now 3+ years later.
Imo, you have the absolute right (and duty??) to demand that she never confuse your daughter and put pullups on her again. That's not cool.
Cowgirls, Gypsys & Wildwomen, Welcome Here. |
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homemomx8
Farmgirl at Heart
1 Posts
betsy
canyon
tx
USA
1 Posts |
Posted - Sep 03 2010 : 2:40:14 PM
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Wow! I am new here but could not help but to respond.
How excellent is the grace of perseverence!
Especially dealing with your MIL and her opposing opinions.
Keep up the good work!
Betsy
peace & many blessings,
betsy |
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star-schipp
True Blue Farmgirl
942 Posts
Starletta
Middletown
Indiana
USA
942 Posts |
Posted - Sep 03 2010 : 5:33:22 PM
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I am so proud of you for continually doing what you know is best for your children in spite of all the "noise" that is going on in your ears! Keep yourself surrounded with like-minded Moms like LLL and you will get stronger everytime you talk with them. Ask us for support anytime - you have my complete and total support. Keep at it...hugs
We can do no great things; only small things with great love - Mother Teresa
farmgirl sister #1927 |
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Sarahpauline
True Blue Farmgirl
672 Posts
sarah
Ringgold
GA
USA
672 Posts |
Posted - Sep 03 2010 : 8:54:40 PM
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I am very lucky my MIL was not anything like that, very kind and respectful and didnt offer advice unless asked or would say, "May I make a suggestion?". But frankly, I feel that you need to set some ground rules for your relationship with her. Im glad you are able to vent with us here, but she would probably feel bad if she knew you were venting to outsiders. If I were in your position I would set some ground rules with her, which I have had to do with some well meaning but frustrating family members myself. For one thing, your guests at your baby shower gave you gifts of money for your baby out of kindness. Why on earth would you allow her to steal it? If I had given a gift I would be furious if someone took it from the intended recipient. I would tell my hubby to approach her about it. Something like "We noticed you had taken money from the cards at the shower, we were hoping you were intending to buy savings bonds or something for the baby. If you haven't decided what to do with it, we have some needs that our gift money would fill. Since the givers are wondering what we spent those funds on it would be appropriate for us to make those decisions. Thanks for holding on to it, I will stop by on Tuesday to pick it up and drop off some new pictures of the baby."
Something similar to that with her suggestions about breast feeding. "Its clear we do not share the same views on raising our children. I respect your experience as a nurse and mother but I am eager to find my own path. I am asking you to trust me to make the very best decisions I can about my baby. When I do, I hope that you will respect them. A new baby is stressful and when you come to my house and criticize choices I have made based on months or years of research I feel frustrated and angry and cannot enjoy your visits. I hope you will continue to visit us, and when you do, that you will enjoy a cup of tea and have fun watching our new baby. But if you would rather make accusations and criticize my choices it might be better for you not to come. Our well being has to come first now."
After this conversation you should promptly invite her to lunch or something with the family so she understands that you arent trying to keep her out. If she starts up again simply stand up, say "I am feeling a little stressed out, I need to lay down for a bit" Go in your room with the baby. Your husband needs to deal with her and support you. Remember, you train people how they may or may not treat you.
I have to say I dont think it was very friendly for your friend to be sarcastic with her. I might ask if a burp cloth was clean too. I cant imagine saying something like that to my MIL. Hopefully it was done in a lighthearted manner.
fat people are harder to kidnap.
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LenaSassafrass
True Blue Farmgirl
69 Posts
Leanne
Hamilton
Montana
USA
69 Posts |
Posted - Sep 03 2010 : 10:44:21 PM
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Oh my goodness Heather! If it were me I woulda shown her the door and let it hit her on the way out. I am so sorry to hear your MIL is being physco! I am grateful that my MIL was really supportive of my nursing. My family is not into all natural or nursing by any means..their thing is whatever is easier/faster. All my SIL on my husbands side nursed their children which opened my eyes to something different/healthier to formula. Stick with it girl and keep her from your home when hubby isn't there if it'll help. Remind her that she raised her children the way she thought best and this is the way you and your hubby thinks is best! Hang in there hunny!!
Leanne
Maizy-brownswiss/jersey
Sassafrass-06/20/10 |
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Roxy7
True Blue Farmgirl
1083 Posts
Robin
Denver
CO
USA
1083 Posts |
Posted - Sep 05 2010 : 09:11:43 AM
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| I BF DS till he was 27 months old. Maybe you should remind her of her own absence. Or tell her that times have changed and the school of thought of the old days when she went to school are not popular anymore. That might shush her. |
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MagnoliaWhisper
True Blue Farmgirl
2817 Posts
Heather
Haysville
Kansas
USA
2817 Posts |
Posted - Mar 15 2011 : 3:29:14 PM
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Thanks gals sorry I was in the middle of a huge move and have been very busy since the move. So haven't came back.
First of all I hope you are a lll leader now. I'm now in LLL here in Kansas and am loving it!
As far as letting my MIL steal the money we by no means let her have it, that would of been giving it to her, hince the word steal. What happened was I had a box for people to put cards in and she took it when we weren't looking and said some one would steal it. Before that my husband and I had read the cards to the group there so every one would see the cards. I knew how much money approx were in the cards as I was keeping mental notes. When she gave the box back much of the money in those cards were gone! We did indeed confront her with it and she denied it. However, no one else touched the box, and we ourselves told her to leave the box alone! And we would take care of it but she didn't listen of course. She never listens to anything from us no matter how firm we are. We didn't allow her to see DD1 once for 6 months (after giving her several warnings if she continued to put her in disposable diapers whenever we visited we would no longer let her see her) I guess she didn't believe us and we called her bluff! Yet, that still didn't stop her when we decided to let her see her again 6 months later. Normal talking to her just doesn't work. I am being quite frank when I say I think she has a learning disability. Along with I think she has deep psychological problems. I mean......normal things just don't make sense to her. For instance my dd1 was going through a lieing stage and we were trying to stop that (just for her own safety!) and my MIL was encouraging her to lie! And we went over the boy who cried wolf story and why this is important and it went way over my MIL head and she said the boy who cried wolf story made no sense at all to her! Any way when we moved here to Kansas my mom is scared to death cause of the way my MIL has coached my dd1 to lie on people. (make up things like we abuse her-hit her, and the like when we don't. she did that to mom one day and mom's a dr and this could greatly effect her job! And my mom is now scared. However, my mom said this was not normal it for sure sounded like this had been coached and I said it has, by MIL!) any way......she doesn't ever see MIL any more thank god. And probably won't again. So thankfully this is over.
But, I was still reeling with hormones when I first posted this, and really upset feeling alone in my battle with her, and not having any one but hubby on my side at the time. Now things are soooo much better. Belle is 1 now and still nursing and I'm preggers again! lol hahaha And we're just loving LLL!
http://www.heathersprairie.blogspot.com |
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MagnoliaWhisper
True Blue Farmgirl
2817 Posts
Heather
Haysville
Kansas
USA
2817 Posts |
Posted - Mar 15 2011 : 3:36:28 PM
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oh just as a PS I was NOT the one sarcastic to her, I am ALWAYS very nice to her. It was my mom's friend who was sarcastic to her.
And as long as she has known me and this is her second granddaughter with me, I am a VERY clean person, I would not give any one a dirty burp cloth. I do think that was a pretty crazy thing to ask me, when she asked for one for my new born preemie baby. Of course I would nto give her a dirty one.
But, again it was NOT me who was sarcastic to her. If you re-read it it all the way through you will see I said it was my mom's friend who said that to her.
And yes, I have always spoke up to her and so has my husband when she doesn't treat us right, but it does no good. I think it comes back to the learning disability I am quite she has. The only way I have finally found out that will work is to just not have her in our lives sadly. Cause we have had these problems since the beginning. She didn't even want to come to our wedding. And she didn't even really want to get to know me back then. This is just her obstinate.
I think psychological problems may be very well a problem as well. I don't know many mom's who would choose not to see their children for 16 years. Because they would rather go dancing at clubs. (this is the reason she gave for not visiting my husband at his grandmothers for 16 years of his life).
http://www.heathersprairie.blogspot.com |
Edited by - MagnoliaWhisper on Mar 15 2011 3:40:15 PM |
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CurlysQuilts
True Blue Farmgirl
569 Posts
Sarah
Northeast Kingdom
VT
USA
569 Posts |
Posted - Mar 16 2011 : 7:04:45 PM
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Wow. Reading this post makes me sooo grateful that my MIL is who she is, even if she frustrates me from time to time. At least she supports me. It also makes me grateful that I live and have had my babies in Vermont, where my hospital has midwives on staff and where they have a lactation consultant who is like your best friend and very hands on with the nursing if you need it. The whole hospital is extrmemely supportive of breastfeeding, and are even a little leery of girls who want to use formula. Vermont legislature actually passed a law about having to allow women who work two 15 minute breaks to pump daily, and employers have to provide private space for this to happen, NOT in a bathroom. Congrats on being preggy again!
Curly's Quilts
www.curlysquilts.etsy.com
“He has shown you, O mortal, what is good. And what does the LORD require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God.” - Micah 6:8
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Parenting & Farm Kids: nursing |
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nursing
