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Family Matters:  Aria's Make-A-Wish trip  |
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julia hayes
True Blue Farmgirl
1132 Posts
julia
medical lake
wa
USA
1132 Posts |
 Posted - May 26 2010 : 06:36:18 AM
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I may have already told you this but we leave this Sunday for a week. We're going to Wyoming to a, ready? DUDE RANCH!!!
I can hardly contain myself.
After I posted about Aria NOT relapsing, I got a call from her doctor. Concern in her voice. Most of her lab work was fine but there was an elevated test that examines overall inflammation in the body related to infection. Aria's was 4 times the acceptable highest level! YIKES!! Doctor said that she wasn't sure what to do with that and wanted a pathologist to look over the results. THAT and we still didn't know the results of a part of the blood evaluation called, "manual differential" This goes through all the blood cells and determines if there are any that look wonky. When you have cancer or "neoplasm" it reads BLASTS. When Aria was first diagnosed her initial blood work was normal with the slight exception of a low hematocrit and her platelets were low but not alarming. Her BLASTS however, were 13 %. This got everyone's attention. 13% of her blood was cancer. When they did a bone marrow aspirate (long BIG needle to extract bone marrow) the blasts were 95%. Oh my..it is so hard to think about this again! Sooo, this manual differential was the key. It was going to tell us if there were any blasts showing up. even 1 % is NOT ok.
I'm telling you this because this is the ride. This is life with cancer. Waiting for results. Waiting. Gearing up to face..whatever...It is extremely emotional and yet the spirit is enormously resilient. My husband was not too concerned. He knows this medical stuff so much more than I. He knows what to do with it--where all these numbers go. I know enough to explain it and process it but it all goes into one big boiling pot. I churn with it for hours and hours.
By yesterday morning, I was ready for anything. I just needed information. I can handle anything. I struggle with not knowing. I waited. Aria was in good spirits. She was pale but ok. We had a wonderful morning. By noon she was fading. 102.8 temp and she was exhausted. Still no word from the doctor. I had basically let it all go. I had gone there again in order for me to fortify. I let go our vacation..everything, I was in a good place.
That is, until my husband came home at 1 o'clock saying he couldn't concentrate. That did it. He was worried. I couldn't stand it any more. Our primary doctor had called earlier in the morning as I was taking Reo and Rianna to school just as a courtesy. She didn't have any info but wanted to see how Aria was. She was home with her own daughter who was sick. This woman is like family. Her # came up on my phone. I finally went ahead and called her. I hesitated because I respect a professional boundary we have. She's at home with her own daughter, I'm a patient..etc..etc. But I couldn't deal. I called.
She reassured me it was fine. The manual differential came back NORMAL!! That was all I needed to hear. N.O.R.M.A.L!!!! I can't begin to describe the relief. Suddenly it felt like my mind was attached to a crank that was slowly opening wider and wider and wider allowing all kinds of wonderful thoughts to flood in. It was bliss.
I'm telling you all this background not only to illustrate the ride but to describe the load, the baggage we carry everywhere we go. You'd like that Aria being done with treatment would no longer bring these kinds of grinding emotions but it happens. The fun stuff doesn't outweigh the hard and scary stuff. Sometimes letting the fun stuff in is hard because you don't want to be disappointed if it doesn't actually happen...I'm telling you this so you'll know..you'll have perspective should you encounter other people--friends and family. Life with cancer is for a period of time like living on a knife's edge.
For the first time, I allowed myself to look at our Make-A-Wish information. We have a wonderful brochure and schedule that was outlining our activities and days Sunday through Saturday. HEAVEN!!
Some of it was a little vague. I started having some questions; Do the cabins have little kitchenettes? Should I be thinking of stocking it? Snacks? The schedule seems pretty tight. If we decide not to do something will that negatively impact the other guests? I just had no idea how this place worked and flowed. I need to know the flow..
I called. I spoke first with the chef who assured me that they would be preparing all of our meals and snacks and whatever.. I told him that I loved him already! I won't be cooking and cleaning for 7 whole days!! Bliss.
The I spoke with his wife, Megan who is coordinating our trip. She reassured me that the itinerary we got is their basic list of activities but that they want to work around us. How sweet. She was so happy we called so they could learn about our food preferences, allergies and so forth. They also wanted to know a little about Aria, her medical status, stamina etc..Then she started to tell me about what they're planning for us. They are going to do this and that and this and that and, and, and, Oh and we know it's your anniversary so we're planning to have the kids do a fun thing with the wranglers while chef prepares a special meal for just you 2 blah blah blah. By this time, I was in tears. It was all I could do not to sob.
I choked out a 'thank you' and let the tears come. I told her about the last few days. I told her that up until 4 hours ago, I had let this holiday go and was fine about it. I told her I had taken on the world of cancer again and doing every painful thing we have to in order to keep Aria alive and well. I was overcome.
She was soooo sweet. "Julia, we are so looking forward to you coming! Oh, and you are our ONLY guests for the entire week! So we want to do anything and everything you guys want to do!" My mouth dropped. My crazy family has this entire ranch to ourselves for the week.
This is Make-A-Wish...I am without words. I called our coordinator to tell him that I had called the ranch and how thrilled I was. I told him, "I just want you and Make-A-Wish to know that I have already had the BEST time!" Everything that happens from here on out is bonus!
Now here's the real kicker. I know, there's more! (there always is in a good story!) I had mentioned this make-a-wish idea to my mother-in-law at least a year ago. I asked if she knew anyone who runs a dude ranch. They live in southeast Kansas and her brothers are ranchers. I was thinking Oklahoma, Kansas, Colorado..something. She has to know someone. Sure enough. She went to highschool with a guy who she thought ran a dude ranch or maybe his son does now..etc..etc.. So anyway, his wife just happens to be visiting this week and she'll see her at Church and will ask for information. Next thing I know I've got brochures! This is where we're going!
You can google it! The history on the name is HILARIOUS!!! UXU dude ranch .....PLEASE check it out!!
That's how my day ended yesterday. I am a very blessed woman. I am deeply indebted and so full of gratitude, I'm about to split! It's all good...
~julia
being simple to simply be
Farmgirl #30
www.julia42.etsy.com
www.about-aria.blogspot.com |
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sherrye
True Blue Farmgirl
3775 Posts
sherry
bend in the high desert
oregon
USA
3775 Posts |
Posted - May 26 2010 : 06:47:25 AM
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oh boy julia, i know how scarey those things can be. sooo very happy you are getting to go on a long break. take lots of pics for us. happy days sherrye
the learn as we go silk purse farm
farmgirl #1014
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ceejay48
Farmgirl Legend/Schoolmarm/Sharpshooter
13620 Posts
CeeJay (CJ)
Dolores
Colorado
USA
13620 Posts |
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clothedinscarlet
True Blue Farmgirl
1333 Posts
Siobhan
Battle Creek
MI
USA
1333 Posts |
Posted - May 26 2010 : 06:53:19 AM
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Oh Julia, your upcoming vacation sounds like it's going to be full of great memories for many years to come! And you and Aria deserve it for how you've both stayed strong and weathered such a rough storm. Enjoy the time to celebrate with your whole family the blessings that God has given! Laugh a lot and enjoy the dude ranch life :)
Farmgirl Sister #1110
Siobhan - AKA Liza-Jane (my farmgirl name), wife to my best friend, Trent, and mommy to Camden (11/28/05) and Bennett (7/11/07). and Truman (7/28/09) |
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Karrieann
True Blue Farmgirl
1900 Posts
Karrieann
Northeast
Georgia
USA
1900 Posts |
Posted - May 26 2010 : 08:11:13 AM
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Oh Julia that is incredible!
Keep a journal!!!!! Beautiful memories in the making! The whole ranch to yourself! That is so awesome!
Yippeee Yi Ayeeeeee
Karrieann ~ Farmgirl Sister #766 (29 Sept 2009)
My Blog: ...following my heart, dreams and Jesus
...http://karrieann-followingmyheartandjesus.blogspot.com/
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Marcy
True Blue Farmgirl
2701 Posts
Marcy
Tiverton
Rhode Island
USA
2701 Posts |
Posted - May 26 2010 : 09:35:03 AM
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You all soooo deserve this. So thankful that everything came back normal. Been thinking about you every day. Thank you for keeping us updated. Hope you all have a WONDERFUL time.
Farmgirl #170
Since you get more joy out of giving joy to others, you should put a good deal of thought into the happiness that you are able to give...Eleanor Roosevelt
http://marcysworldofcreativity.blogspot.com/
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Fiddlehead Farm
True Blue Farmgirl
4562 Posts
Diane
Waupaca
WI
USA
4562 Posts |
Posted - May 26 2010 : 4:15:36 PM
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I am so happy for all of you! What a wonderful program and what a wonderful time you will have! Relax, enjoy and breathe.
Age only matters if you are wine or cheese.
http://studiodiphotosite.shutterfly.com/
farmgirl sister #922 |
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jpbluesky
True Blue Farmgirl
6066 Posts
Jeannie
Florida
USA
6066 Posts |
Posted - May 26 2010 : 6:16:02 PM
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Julia - no words suffice. Enjoy each moment and thank you.
Farmgirl Sister # 31
www.blueskyjeannie.blogspot.com
Psalm 51: 10-13 |
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Alee
True Blue Farmgirl
22937 Posts
Alee
Worland
Wy
USA
22937 Posts |
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simplyflowers
True Blue Farmgirl
489 Posts
Jamie
Locust Grove
Virginia
USA
489 Posts |
Posted - May 26 2010 : 6:19:38 PM
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I cant wait to hear about your trip upon your return!!!!! How exciting!!! A dude ranch! :)
"Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work." -- Thomas Edison
Check out my blog!! http://thehappycalamity.blogspot.com/ |
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Alee
True Blue Farmgirl
22937 Posts
Alee
Worland
Wy
USA
22937 Posts |
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julia hayes
True Blue Farmgirl
1132 Posts
julia
medical lake
wa
USA
1132 Posts |
Posted - May 26 2010 : 8:43:59 PM
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Alee are you kidding?? We are flying into Cody.. I do know we are staying on the ranch for those first few days..well Tuesday we head to Yellowstone. We don't have transportation. They are taking us everywhere. Thursday is 'Cody' day... I'm planning on having a massage. HUGE treat for me. It feels ridiculously decadent but I'm doing it anyway.. I'll have my lap-top AND my cell.. send me an email or I'll send you a msg on FB with my cell # too. I'd LOVE to hook up and see you. I'd love for you to come to the ranch and visit us!! HEAVEN!!!!! Farmgirl action in serious form! wooohoo and YEEEHAW!!!
Sisters, seriously, all these responses make me want to cry. I am a bit of an emotional mess right now but in a really good way. Just emotional about the goodness of people and life in general. We are so riddled with bad news that it is sometimes so hard to see and know goodness. I'm here to tell you that it is FAR greater than ANY horror out there. It really is. The smallest goodness is absolutely capable of healing the greatest horror. We must remember that in all that we do and say and think....
It makes me think of something MaryJane said during a lecture I had the privilege of attending a few years ago. She was wearing this beautiful handmade lace-like scarf. It was thin and intricate. It took hours and hours to make. She bought it at an antique store for next to nothing, as I recall, and she had a bit of guilt about buying it at such a steal. It's so fun to score a good deal but at the same it's always at the expense of someone else was her message. It sort of haunted her and made her think. It was then that it occurred to her that what defines the farmgirl spirit with such precision isn't the reward to be had at the end of making a product, but rather the process it takes one to get there. She then went on to talk about wondering about the woman who made this beautiful piece of lace she was so proud to wear. She wondered about the hours spent watching tv with her young children or hours spent outside on a rocking chair, or hours spent with other friends making similar pieces. Who knows? It doesn't really matter. The process of making it was what was so healing for the woman who did. She poured her thoughts into her--maybe her sorrows and her hopes. We can't know but we can know that the process is good and full of reward and healing. We know this and that is why we come here.
I am so so so very grateful to each and everyone of you. I have this sense of driving to this ranch and the entire way is lined with the spirits of you cheering us on, telling Aria, "Way to go!" encouraging me and my wonderful husband Doc, and our glorious children.
I send my blessings to each and every one of you. Virtual hugs are all that I have to offer until the day I can embrace you in real life! Until that time, here's to Aria and here's to you! ~julia
being simple to simply be
Farmgirl #30
www.julia42.etsy.com
www.about-aria.blogspot.com |
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Alee
True Blue Farmgirl
22937 Posts
Alee
Worland
Wy
USA
22937 Posts |
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texdane
Farmgirl Legend Chapter Leader Chapter Guru
4658 Posts
Nicole
Sandy Hook
CT
USA
4658 Posts |
Posted - May 27 2010 : 05:12:46 AM
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Julia, I am so happy for all of you. Go on your vacation and ENJOY yourself. You certainly deserve it. Hugs to you and your family.
Nicole
Farmgirl Sister #1155
KNITTER, JAM-MAKER AND MOM EXTRAORDINAIRE |
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graciegreeneyes
True Blue Farmgirl
3107 Posts
Amy Grace
Rosalia
WA
USA
3107 Posts |
Posted - May 27 2010 : 07:30:01 AM
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What a wonderful chance to have with your family - I so hope you all enjoy your week!!
Amy Grace
Farmgirl #224
"use it up, wear it out, make it do, or do without"
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CountryBorn
True Blue Farmgirl
1545 Posts
Mary Jane
New York
USA
1545 Posts |
Posted - May 28 2010 : 07:58:20 AM
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Sometimes Julia life is just plain GOOD!!! When it is it just fills you with this beautiful feeling of warmth and love and an overwhelming sense of true happiness. It just makes you feel so good to be alive! If anyone family, any little girl any Mom ever deserved it, it is certainly all of you. I hope you have the most fantastic wondeful fun filled family experience that you will all cherish forever. I an so very happy and excited for all of you!
Love and hugs to all of you !
Mary Jane
There can be no happiness if the things we believe in are different from the things we do. Freya Stark |
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traildancer
True Blue Farmgirl
485 Posts
Loyce
Glide
OR
USA
485 Posts |
Posted - May 28 2010 : 09:36:49 AM
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Hello, ladies. Reading Julia's post and all your replies really lifts my spirits. I am so sorry that your family is going through this turmoil. How wonderful that you get a vacation all to yourself!! Enjoy, enjoy, enjoy!
The trail is the thing.... Louis L'Amour |
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Family Matters: Aria's Make-A-Wish trip |
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Aria's Make-A-Wish trip
