| Author |
Across the Fence:  Facebook page  |
|
|
asnedecor
True Blue Farmgirl
1054 Posts
Anne
Portland
Or
USA
1054 Posts |
 Posted - Mar 27 2010 : 11:56:52 AM
|
Here's a question for all of you that have Face Book pages - when you add a friend do you send a message with the request? Especially if it is not a person you have spoken to in quite sometime - maybe years? Also do you just accept a friend request when one is sent only by the familiarity of the name?
I am still new to Face Book - but have taken the approach of sending a brief message to the individual re-introducing myself when asking for a friend request. I also don't just accept just anyone to my page because the name is familiar.
I have noticed since I hooked up on FB, that I have been able to connect with some very old high school friends, but only those that I had a friendship with. I have gotten requests from people I barely knew then and don't even know now and have ignored those requests.
I thought the point of facebook is to connect with friends and relatives, co-workers and re-connect with old friends, not to see who can accumulate the most connections.
I recently got a request from a person from High School that was not my friend - in fact she was kinda ##tch to me when we went to school. Why on earth would I want her in my adult life - go figure.
That is what got me to thinking how do others use the FB website.
Just some thoughts.
Anne in Portland, OR
"Weeds are flowers too, once you get to know them" Eyeore from Winnie the Pooh
|
|
|
birdie71
True Blue Farmgirl
254 Posts
Robin
Glendale
Arizona
USA
254 Posts |
Posted - Mar 27 2010 : 12:45:02 PM
|
Anne,
I would say that it is your choice to send a message with the request. But if it has been some time since you've spoken, a message might be good for refreshing the mind. I would also say you don't necessarily have to accept the request. There have been some that I haven't ~ mostly because I really don't think I knew that person but also because I don't really think I would or have ever connected with them.
I think that it is a good place for connection and I agree that it is rather silly to use it as a place to accumulate. Unfortunately, I think that's what some do, missing the point of connecting.
What's great about it is that you can manage who views your page and you can manage your "friends"...it's all in how you decide you want it to be.
Robin
Farmgirl #1301
Farming in the Sonoran Desert? Hmmm?! |
 |
|
|
farmmilkmama
True Blue Farmgirl
2027 Posts
Amy
Central MN
USA
2027 Posts |
Posted - Mar 27 2010 : 6:47:31 PM
|
Grrr. Facebook. Although I think it can be used as a place to connect, I think all too often it turns into the "accumulating friends" that you're talking about. I don't use it anymore. I got tired of being friended by people who couldn't give me the time of day in high school or places I used to work, but are suddenly very interested in who I am now. Or wait - they didn't really want to **talk** to me, they just wanted another friend in their roster. I just don't get it! I also got tired of the *earth shatteringly important* status updates that people would post. Like "I'm so bored. Sooooo bored." or "getting in the shower and trying to figure out what shampoo to use today". Are these people for real??
Like Robin said, its all in how you use it. I guess for me it just reminded me too much of high school. I hope you have more fun with it! :)
--* FarmMilkMama *--
Farmgirl Sister #1086
Be yourself.
Everyone else is already taken.
-Oscar Wilde
www.wakeupstartlearning.blogspot.com
www.farmfoodmama.blogspot.com |
|
|
|
asnedecor
True Blue Farmgirl
1054 Posts
Anne
Portland
Or
USA
1054 Posts |
Posted - Mar 28 2010 : 07:44:18 AM
|
Amy & Robin -
Well I feel I am on the right track on how I use it. I only have a few friends that are connected to me and it has helped me connect with one in particular that I was grade school friends with thru High School and then lost track. We have had some great e-mails back and forth and hope to get together when she is in Oregon next time - so it has been good for that. But like you said, I am not into accumulating as many friends as I can, I don't always post my status everyday like "I am bored" - hate that :) But I think I am getting out of it what it is meant to be used as. Also I can keep up on my one an only niece who is in her first year of College - which has been great.
Anne in Portland, OR
"Weeds are flowers too, once you get to know them" Eyeore from Winnie the Pooh
|
|
|
|
graciegreeneyes
True Blue Farmgirl
3107 Posts
Amy Grace
Rosalia
WA
USA
3107 Posts |
Posted - Mar 28 2010 : 07:59:22 AM
|
I agree with you guys - I think it was originally intended to be used as a way to catch up with people, but has turned into one of those "oh, I'm the star of my own movie" things. anyway....I had to laugh because I just had to ask my son those same questions, when did it turn out that we asked our kids the way the world worked?
Amy Grace
Farmgirl #224
"use it up, wear it out, make it do, or do without"
|
|
|
|
prairie_princess
True Blue Farmgirl
613 Posts
Elizabeth
Carpenter
WY
USA
613 Posts |
Posted - Mar 28 2010 : 08:26:31 AM
|
I agree, all those sites can be used for the wrong reasons and can dilute how people interact and communicate today. I have a best friend whom I've known since 4th grade who hates to talk on the phone! She normally will only chat on the message thing on Facebook or Yahoo with me... but I usually ask her if we could talk on the phone instead if it has been awhile. There's only so much you can write on those chat things!
But I've also discovered Facebook has been a wonderful tool to connect with those I've lost connections with over the years. And I can see where accepting some people's requests might seem bad, especially if they never gave you the time of day in high school or what have you. But I've discovered that some of those people have actually apoligized to me and we will actually chat with each other. I think people change, some realize their mistakes and you realize yours. So I do accept requests from those people, too. You'd be surprised who you'll connect with in your adult life compared to high school and college life. There are people on there who I chat with more who I didn't connect with as much in high school and now we have a lot in common! That's not always the case, but I was definitely surprised. So sometimes, after all those past mistakes have been sorted out, you may connect with someone you "hated."
I do agree, though, it is a good idea to send messages with your friend request, especially if it is someone who may not recognize you right away. And especially for those married gals who's last names have changed.
Now the big question I have.... who plays Farmville on Facebook!!! I'm quite addicted to it...
"Only two things that money can't buy, that's true love and homegrown tomatoes."
- Guy Clark
"The man who has planted a garden feels he has done something for the good of the world."
- Charles Dudley Warner |
|
|
|
farmmilkmama
True Blue Farmgirl
2027 Posts
Amy
Central MN
USA
2027 Posts |
Posted - Mar 28 2010 : 10:01:33 AM
|
Elizabeth - just wanted to clear up. I have connected with a few people who I wasn't pals with in high school but found out we have lots in common now. So I didn't mean to make it sound like people never change. I guess what I was more getting at was the people who wouldn't talk to you in high school who friend you...and you accept, and then they never connect with you more than that. I guess that's when I wonder what the point was of sending a friend request to out. Was it just to accumulate friends? If I attempt to connect with you (seeing as how I accepted your friend request) and I never hear from you in the two months after that...what was the point??
There are several instances where FB can be a good thing - I hope it didn't sound like I was saying it was all bad. :) There are just certain portions of the population who make it a little aggravating.
--* FarmMilkMama *--
Farmgirl Sister #1086
Be yourself.
Everyone else is already taken.
-Oscar Wilde
www.wakeupstartlearning.blogspot.com
www.farmfoodmama.blogspot.com |
|
|
|
Annika
True Blue Farmgirl
5602 Posts
Annika
USA
5602 Posts |
|
|
prairie_princess
True Blue Farmgirl
613 Posts
Elizabeth
Carpenter
WY
USA
613 Posts |
Posted - Mar 28 2010 : 12:27:28 PM
|
Yep, there are also lots of those people who just want to "friend" you, too. And I know I hate getting requests especially from people I don't know... I've also had the opposite case, where i have been looking for a friend for ages, finally find them on there, become virtual friends, and then I never hear from them again even though we were close long ago. It's interesting how people change, how your chemistry will change with different people over the years.
"Only two things that money can't buy, that's true love and homegrown tomatoes."
- Guy Clark
"The man who has planted a garden feels he has done something for the good of the world."
- Charles Dudley Warner |
|
|
|
asnedecor
True Blue Farmgirl
1054 Posts
Anne
Portland
Or
USA
1054 Posts |
Posted - Mar 28 2010 : 3:21:26 PM
|
Elizabeth -
I admit I too am addicted to Farmville - a former co-worker who I keep in contact with on FB, got me started. But I draw the line at only Farmville - don't even want to get started on those others. But Farmville has opened some lines of communication with old classmates - we swap items and compare notes on how we like or dislike the program. I have connected with some people that I didn't have much in common with in high school but do now. My big thing is when I e-mail an individual back on how I know them, etc and there is no answer I ignore the friend request. You can't just connect to me because you know my name - sorry doesn't work that way for me. If I send a request with a note and get a "chilly" reply, I politely leave it and move on - have had one of those.
I just think all politeness and etiquette goes out the door because it is on a computer and not face to face - which is too bad.
Anne in Portland, OR
"Weeds are flowers too, once you get to know them" Eyeore from Winnie the Pooh
|
|
|
|
prairie_princess
True Blue Farmgirl
613 Posts
Elizabeth
Carpenter
WY
USA
613 Posts |
Posted - Mar 29 2010 : 08:22:59 AM
|
Anne- I only use FarmVille, too. I'll only do the games that I have an actual interest in... I pretend I'm building my dream farm. Or, when i'm farming in real life, I'll model my virtual farm after my real farm, plant what I'm planting in real life! Kinda fun... too bad you can't harvest crops in 1 day like on farmville...
"Only two things that money can't buy, that's true love and homegrown tomatoes."
- Guy Clark
"The man who has planted a garden feels he has done something for the good of the world."
- Charles Dudley Warner |
|
|
|
tinarie
True Blue Farmgirl
59 Posts
Tina
Bagdad
Florida
USA
59 Posts |
Posted - Mar 29 2010 : 08:25:39 AM
|
Hi all of you Farmville friends. I can always use extra FV friends if you would like to be my neighbor I would love it!!
I mostly use FB for my very close friends and Farmville. I love having my own farm. We can dream can't we:)
...When one flower blooms,spring awakens everywhere....
- John O'Donohue
Sweet B Papers My Etsy Shop
tinarie21.etsy.com |
|
|
|
marmieto12
True Blue Farmgirl
213 Posts
laura
utah
USA
213 Posts |
Posted - Mar 29 2010 : 08:53:06 AM
|
I send a message when I request a friend, only because I don't use my full name. I don't accumulate friends and I keep in regular touch with friends and family.
My adult kids and I use it as a message board too. I don't play games. I love the chat and email as it is quieter for me with having little ones.
Laura;Dreaming of big girl farm...
Farmgirl # 148
Farm Girl Projects http://justsimplythegirls.blogspot.com
My Vinyl Decor Business http://thegirlscreate.blogspot.com |
|
|
|
tinarie
True Blue Farmgirl
59 Posts
Tina
Bagdad
Florida
USA
59 Posts |
Posted - Mar 29 2010 : 09:23:41 AM
|
Anne. I never send out friend requests. Everyone seems to come to me. But I never send a message back.I have ignored many friend requests and sometimes they keep coming back. It's not because I don't know the person it's because when I see the person in passing they don't speak to me. Why would you want to be my friend if you don't speak to me in the real world? Just to be nosey like most people. I signed up on FB because it's easy to send photos or make comments to my closet friends. I went on FB for a handful of friends and now have friends that I want to delete because they are not really friends. I had one person constantly request to be my friend when I kept ignoring the request. I saw this person in church one day and she wouldn't even smile at me. Mad because I did not except her request. We don't even communicate in real life. That part of FB I do not enjoy. My advice is don't except anyone your not really friends with and be careful what you post. You think no one can see it but if you don't use your privacy just so everyone can see what you say.
FB is great for communicating with those great friends and family in your life.
...When one flower blooms,spring awakens everywhere....
- John O'Donohue
Sweet B Papers My Etsy Shop
tinarie21.etsy.com |
|
|
|
KayB
True Blue Farmgirl
540 Posts
Kay
Del City
Oklahoma
USA
540 Posts |
Posted - Mar 29 2010 : 11:37:55 AM
|
I accidentally accepted DH's ex-wife because Ithought she was somebody else. It took him to let me know who she is. I don't know how she found me, but she sends me all kinds of gifts for my farms. She's said maybe half a dozen things to me in the 13 years DH and I have been married, although I've known him for almost 30 years and everybody was already divorced when I met him. I've hooked up with various friends and kids I went to school with. I sure wish I could find some of my Army buddies, though.
KayB
Life's a dance you learn as you go |
|
|
| |
Across the Fence: Facebook page |
|
Facebook page
