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A Farm of My Own: Empowing Women ![Next Topic Next Topic](icons/icon_go_right.gif) |
Diane B Carter
True Blue Farmgirl
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1270 Posts
Diane
Blasdell
N.Y.
USA
1270 Posts |
Posted - Mar 27 2009 : 08:51:47 AM
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My girlfriend had a start in life like Sandra, she was seperated from her sisters at age three, they were all sent to live in different houses. The father figure beat her and raped her, the mom figure ignored her screams. Thankfully she got out when she was 17ish. But found herself with child. She married the dad but soon realized he was no good. When she was 8 months along he said they were moving to California. To pay the way they sold almost everything she owned. She got lucky and found a friend who watched her son while she gave birth to her daughter. The hubby wanted another son and he left her. When her real dad, the man who gave her up and left her with abusive strangers, got old and was unalbe to care for himself she drove back to N.Y. with her 2 children picked him up and drove back to California with him and took care of him for many years. She is now married to a good man but he is sickly and she has to take care of him. They also live in Idaho. I think Kathy is wonderful and I'm so glad her life is at least peaceful. She has God in her life and feels happy. And to think women admired me for being the only girl on the track team in 1969. My dad was and still is the best man in the world. He belives a mans job is to take care of his family and his family wouldn't be their if not for his wife so mom always came first. To this day she takes care of him, driving him around,serving his meals to him but happy to do it. She also worked out of the house so I did the dinner meals, and helped mom. The boys did work but not womens work. Yet I still shoveled snow and cut grass. My parents paid for my oldest brother to go to college. I paid my own way. Life is strange,I am also on my 3ad marriage. My childrens dad was abusive to me but when he hit our 2 year old because he wanted a bite of Daddy's sub. I left, My second got into drugs,I left. This one I have now is real nice and funny and I tell him he's a keeper. He keeps on this best behavior because I have my own home in the country and I would leave in a heart beat if he was mean. I am so glad my dad never hit us or put us down. I had a good childhood and now I have a happy life. Women need to be strong and know they can do anything a man can do and usually do it neater.
Hope all your days are Sunnydays. dianebcarterhotmailcom.blogspot.com |
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idsweetie72
True Blue Farmgirl
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129 Posts
Sandra
New Meadows
idaho
USA
129 Posts |
Posted - Mar 27 2009 : 12:29:41 PM
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Diane, you are so correct- we do need to realize that as a woman we can do (almost) anything a man can do- (I can't write my name in the snow)
Mazy Day Farm |
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KD Earthwork
True Blue Farmgirl
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210 Posts
Katie
Gualala
Calif.
USA
210 Posts |
Posted - Apr 02 2009 : 6:17:57 PM
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Wow I love these amazing stories,but how difficult.There was this Gloria Steinem book I read once where the roles of men and women were written reversed.I loaned it out and don't know the name.But it protrayed woman as the dominating gender .Men would get in trouble if "they got"a woman pregnant.The examples are great,makes you realize women are a minority in this culture and men are dominating not just a patriarchial culture. I work w/ my husband w/ this.But I still carry a huge weight for not much recognition.My projects are to be done w/ the kids or after housework,meals,shopping,dressing the family and home, working.I remember seeing that my life would be like this when I was younger,because even then I did the maintenence of my own car and created and took care of the gardens.Then of course meals and house cleaning.When kids came just more tacked on.The only saving thing is that as I watched my confidence build and try to fit in all the imaginings I wanted to do.The things I could make happen,to realize my own power,not of manipulation,or from benefiting from someone else's effort.When we built this house,basically all contracted and manifested by my skills,(my husband help hugely,but wouldn't have made it happen on his own)including the financing.It's really amazed me what I could do.This was at 46 w/ a new baby too,never stopped working either.Not to just brag,but more to recognize what I never had before how powerful I really am. I think we got kind of a bum deal in this women's liberation stuff of trying to be like men,yet not really being able to think that way.How do we really become powerful forces of womanly,matronly leading a underground movement as leaders of the family.Not as the dominant force but in the nurturing,smart, world viewing women of the house.These last two days I'm suffering from serious lack of sleep due to a sick toddler.But it was so wonderful to feed her herbs good food and water and care and nurture her back to health.Not run to the doctor,feed her cold medicine and send her to daycare.I know this will pass thru me to her children,is this not power as well . I think about the food issues and how busy the seed companies are this year and have hope for the world,the women are solving the food crisis in thier own way(maybe not just the women,give these good guys credit). Anyway,go make chicken soup... Katie |
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Alee
True Blue Farmgirl
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22941 Posts
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Alee
Worland
Wy
USA
22941 Posts |
Posted - Apr 02 2009 : 8:04:55 PM
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Sandra *hugs* Your story is heartbreaking but beautiful in the end. You are so strong to come out of that experience with a positive out look on life.
You ladies never cease to amaze me! I am so lucky to know you through this forum!
Alee Farmgirl Sister #8 www.awarmheart.com Please come visit Nora and me on our blog: www.farmgirlalee.blogspot.com Put your pin on the farmgirl map! www.farmgirlmap.blogspot.com |
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JojoNH
True Blue Farmgirl
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1984 Posts
Joanna
Dunbarton
New Hampshire
USA
1984 Posts |
Posted - Apr 17 2009 : 04:58:47 AM
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Katie, thank you for starting this topic and to all of you who have written here. Wow, just look at how empowered all of you are! I am saying my prayers of thanks that I have found all of you.
I have walked to the beat of my own drum for a very long time. Many have turned their backs on me, while others simply poke fun. Truly, I do not care!! Seems that those who turn their backs do so because they have been to afraid to follow their spirits to where they will lead. Those who poke fun are wishing they had the ability to do what I do. So, I always pray for all of them. . .hoping one day they to will honor their inner voice and realize that they are empowered women too!
Seems that once you have found your inner voice it empowers you through even the darkest days and allows the sun to shine even more brightly than it ever has before. Thank you to all of you, it is so comforting to know there are others out there that feel as I do. . . empowered to do our own thing.![](icons/icon_smile.gif) Joanna JojoNH
http://www.CountryCents.com http://CountryCents.Blogspot.com |
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yarnmamma
True Blue Farmgirl
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4247 Posts
Linda
Clarks Summit
PA
USA
4247 Posts |
Posted - Apr 17 2009 : 06:51:53 AM
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Very well put!
Linda in Scranton, PA farmgirl #71 |
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Alee
True Blue Farmgirl
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22941 Posts
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Alee
Worland
Wy
USA
22941 Posts |
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KD Earthwork
True Blue Farmgirl
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210 Posts
Katie
Gualala
Calif.
USA
210 Posts |
Posted - Apr 17 2009 : 07:46:45 AM
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Wow, I love talking to all of you,even in the midst of an incredibly busy time you all are like touching home.Thank you for everyones words and deep sharing.I've been reading Wanda Urbanska's "Simple Living", trying to get even my idyllic yet too little time life sorted out.This working to support the farm reality that big agribusiness has done to us is counter-intuitive.All well, I'm just happy my husband and I are still both in good work and everyone's healthy.Good wishes to you all. Katie |
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5 acre Farmgirl
True Blue Farmgirl
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1007 Posts
~~~*Terri*~~~
WA.
USA
1007 Posts |
Posted - Jun 03 2009 : 1:41:31 PM
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Aren't everyones dreams different? For some, it may not be to build a house, or drive a tractor, and for others it just might be to be a homemaker and raise children and have the love of your life for your entire life..... I give it to those, and say a great big, "HURRAH"!!! who want it all, but, I am 52 and just cannot possibly do it all anymore, just do what I can.... More power to those who can do it all......YAAAA!!!!
Farmgirl Sister #368 "It is most common for man to value most what has least worth." My Farm and Garden blog.... http://blogonthefarmandgarden.blogspot.com
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yarnmamma
True Blue Farmgirl
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4247 Posts
Linda
Clarks Summit
PA
USA
4247 Posts |
Posted - Jun 03 2009 : 7:16:19 PM
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Hi everyone. I loved this topic when ya first started it and happy to see posts come back again after a couple months. YAAA to all of us who enjoy being empowered. This is the greatest time in the history of our country for women. Women are recognized as strong and intelligent as ever. I sure would like to see more respect and honor given to the ones who care for children at home as their job. Children are not just to babysit but they are being taught how to live by the way we treat them and what they see us do. I like the old saying.
"The hand that rocks the cradle rules the world!" Ain't it the truth!!
Linda in Scranton, PA farmgirl #71
"WELL BEHAVED WOMEN RARELY MAKE HISTORY"
(The Junk Gypsy) |
Edited by - yarnmamma on Jun 03 2009 7:17:49 PM |
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yarnmamma
True Blue Farmgirl
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4247 Posts
Linda
Clarks Summit
PA
USA
4247 Posts |
Posted - Jun 03 2009 : 7:21:31 PM
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what do ya ladies think of my new tagline...it's a very old saying...anyone remember this?
Linda in Scranton, PA farmgirl #71
"The hand that rocks the cradle rules the world"
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KD Earthwork
True Blue Farmgirl
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210 Posts
Katie
Gualala
Calif.
USA
210 Posts |
Posted - Jun 03 2009 : 8:32:10 PM
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I think that's a great thought and one of the most important jobs in the world.But I'm not sure we all are the best at it.I have three kids and have been able to work kids and jobs together for the first few years with each of them.I had this energy for too many different things and like creating grand projects.I'm not always the best influence on my kids. I can represent certain dynamics to them but rely on others to show them other ways. I like the concept it takes a village to raise a child.But I really admire people who can put children first,it's just not always me.Please don't take this wrong. Katie |
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KD Earthwork
True Blue Farmgirl
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210 Posts
Katie
Gualala
Calif.
USA
210 Posts |
Posted - Aug 23 2009 : 7:38:42 PM
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I just got to go to Mary Jane's Farm and was so inspired. All of us have something to offer, I think it's about that, offering what we can.Whether it be food ,instruction, advice, a listening ear , friendship, inspiration.Let's let it SHINE !!! |
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yarnmamma
True Blue Farmgirl
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4247 Posts
Linda
Clarks Summit
PA
USA
4247 Posts |
Posted - Aug 24 2009 : 03:35:50 AM
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Welcome katie! I am so glad that you brought this topic back up, it's a good one!
Linda in Scranton, PA
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ZenGoddess
True Blue Farmgirl
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613 Posts
Cindy
MO
USA
613 Posts |
Posted - Aug 28 2009 : 8:44:27 PM
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I am enjoying reading the posts and what I do know is far from everything, but i am older and my daughter says sometimes too wise.
Remember there is no I in team... United we stand and as farmgirls we all make a difference, so next time your out doin your chores and you feel alone ...please remember that the rest of us "real women" are right there with ya.. doing ours. I rarely say "I think I can" coz "I know I can" I'm a farm girl. Saying this to yourself straightens the backbone and the work gets done. Just my thoughts
Hugs, Zens Goddess My life goal is to Simply - Simplify my life. http://herbalcottage.blogspot.com http://herbalcottage.etsy.com |
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KD Earthwork
True Blue Farmgirl
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210 Posts
Katie
Gualala
Calif.
USA
210 Posts |
Posted - Aug 29 2009 : 2:58:07 PM
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Yes, I do sometimes feel pretty reclusive.After working, coming home tending farms chores and animal chores,making dinner for family(usually picking some of it first).I keep thinking of how farmgirls in the past got together to help each other get things done.Seems were all too busy out here in this rural area.Still trying though.Any suggestions as to how to get friends over?I know there's all kinds of ideas in Magazine's and books.Part of it is I have a late in life child and most of my friends children are growing up(I have a 21,13 and 3). So don't have that connection.I'm gardening like crazy it seems to be my salvation, at work tending ten acres of formal gardens,then home to our "trying to be self-sufficient farm".Just canned 42 quarts of tomatoes,five quarts of dilly beans. I appreciate this team spirit just haven't found a way to share it yet. |
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