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Parenting & Farm Kids:  Foster parenting??  |
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emsmommy5
True Blue Farmgirl
1547 Posts
Angie
Buckley
WA
USA
1547 Posts |
 Posted - Jan 07 2009 : 9:54:58 PM
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Just looking for some input from foster parents on the pros and cons. We went to our first training meeting tonight and the film was very pollyanna, the instructors rather blah-zay (no I couldn't remember how to spell it!)and the "dshs" worker rather snotty.
Feeling a little discouraged with the idea tonight, even though I feel strongly it's something we should do. We want to foster medically fragile babies. No kids old enough to walk around and get into things right now!
Farmgirl #208
What are you doing with your dash? |
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Aunt Jenny
True Blue Farmgirl
11381 Posts
Jenny
middle of
Utah
USA
11381 Posts |
Posted - Jan 07 2009 : 10:32:29 PM
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We have done foster care quite a bit..and our adopted kids (5) were all foster kids when we got them...some as foster kids in our home that stayed and some as legal risk adoptive placements. Anyway....I don't know how it is in your state...we have adopted in both Calif and Utah..so this is my experience....
Question EVERYTHING! The workers do have a habit of candycoating things and you just NEED to know the facts!! My youngest foster child was 3 (he is 12 and 1/2 now) so I don't know much about adopting babies...except that even medically fragile ones take longer to get.
Do you plan to maybe eventually adopt, or just foster? If you do want to adopt eventually I think foster care is an awesome thing to do first...you learn so much..and it for sure really affects a child's life in a positive way. I would look for a foster care group in your area...since all areas have different rules and all they would be the best support. You can ask the worker (or just call the DCFS office) for some names of foster parents to talk to about their experience in foster care. Or ask around and get some word of mouth advice from someone who has done foster care in your area.
Good luck!! I know it was right for us..and if you feel strongly don't let the adults involved keep you from helping the kids who need it!
Jenny in Utah
Proud Farmgirl sister #24
Inside me there is a skinny woman crying to get out...but I can usually shut her up with cookies
http://www.auntjennysworld.blogspot.com/ visit my little online shop at www.auntjenny.etsy.com |
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emsmommy5
True Blue Farmgirl
1547 Posts
Angie
Buckley
WA
USA
1547 Posts |
Posted - Jan 08 2009 : 07:52:57 AM
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Thanks Jenny.
We are not looking to adopt, just help. I want babies, because quite frankly, I don't want to have to chase little kids or deal with the issues of older ones at this point in my life. I feel selfish, but I also know that's about what our family can handle at this point in time. I am sure we will "grow" into the rest!
THanks again for your input.
Farmgirl #208
What are you doing with your dash? |
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mikesgirl
True Blue Farmgirl
3659 Posts
Sherri
Elma
WA
USA
3659 Posts |
Posted - Jan 08 2009 : 08:41:54 AM
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I've been a foster parent in Washington and worked quite extensively with the agency from the professional side, when I was a Family Development Specialist in Seattle. One thing that I've experienced is although you sign up for babies, it doesn't mean they won't try to get you to take older kids. They did it with us and I've seen it happen to other families. They will call and ask you to take "temporary" kids or emergency placement kids in the middle of the night, even if you're not signed up to be an emergency placement family. That said, I found it to be a rewarding, but challenging experience. If you DO actually only get babies, your experience may be very different than mine. I had grade school kids and you probably aren't used to dealing with the behaviors of kids who have had things done to them that got them into foster care in the first place. THAT was really challenging for us. As far as the "blah zay-ness" of the staff, I think some of that may come from being overwhelmed. I know when I started as a Home Visitor, my case load was only about 8 families, to visit once a week, which was manageable, but by the time I quit, my case load had tripled, and I was feeling pretty out of it myself. Good luck - I hope your experience is a good one. Watch out for those things I mentioned - but it's been 5 years or so since we did it, so things may have changed.
Farmgirl Sister #98
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emsmommy5
True Blue Farmgirl
1547 Posts
Angie
Buckley
WA
USA
1547 Posts |
Posted - Jan 09 2009 : 6:42:11 PM
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Peobably not changed much. At least from what we have seen at the two training classes we have been at. I am pretty adament that I can't take "kids" I don't have the time or energy to deal with behavior issues at this time in our life. I can handle little ones that don't walk yet! They said they are so desperate for foster parents they will often try to get you to take kids. But, they also said it's ok to say no. So..... I plan to say NO!! =) We may grow into it as the years go on, but definitely not right now.
SO remind me of that when I write in whining!!! =)
Farmgirl #208
What are you doing with your dash? |
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Parenting & Farm Kids: Foster parenting?? |
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Foster parenting??
