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Across the Fence:  Cold War in Hot Texas  |
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elphie0503
True Blue Farmgirl
500 Posts
Samantha
Gilmer
Texas
USA
500 Posts |
 Posted - Jun 06 2008 : 12:41:29 PM
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I have an amazing group of friends that I have been blessed to be the center of...somehow I am the hub and I keep the wheel going. Each one of us--there are 5--bring something special to the sisterhood; however, here lately there has been discord. Two of my dearies have been at cold war with each other...one, Lady J we'll call her, has a problem with Lady K--in the aspect that Lady K is more wordly when it comes to possessions. K and her DH work very hard for the things that they have, and I have never witnessed any of the "rubbing in" that Lady J has began to complain about. On the other hand, Lady K I believe has been picking up on the stink-eye vibes that Lady J has put out, but at the same time, I believe she is a bit clueless as to how Lady J truly feels about her. Lady J is as close to me as my sister, and Lady K is just as close, so when they call me and we talk, I feel so bound. I don't believe either of them really know what the other is feeling, and I can't convince Lady J that it may just be a communication error. I can't talk to the other 2 in our group about this--they are so busy with personal issues right now. I don't want to see our wheel break apart, because I don't believe any of us could function correctly without each other! How do I stay in the middle, without hurting either of their feelings?? Is there a way that I can be a peace keeper in this situation?? Thank y'all for any help...Sam
Dirt under my nails and weeds in my hair...don't tell me I can't dress up with flair! |
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lisamarie508
True Blue Farmgirl
2648 Posts
Lisa
Idaho City
ID
USA
2648 Posts |
Posted - Jun 06 2008 : 2:39:31 PM
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Boy is that a hard one. The first thing that came to mind was a lock-down sleep-over with only those two women. If they have no way out, they have no choice but to work it out. I could be wrong, though.
Farmgirl Sister #35
"If you can not do great things, do small things in a great way." Napoleon Hill (1883-1970)
my blog: http://lisamariesbasketry.blogspot.com/
My Website:
http://www.freewebs.com/lisamariesbasketry/index.htm |
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Mumof3
True Blue Farmgirl
3890 Posts
Karin
Ellenwood
GA
USA
3890 Posts |
Posted - Jun 06 2008 : 4:14:42 PM
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There is no such thing as being in the middle and not hurting anyone. I would stay out of it, not discuss it with either of them and just be their friend without trying to fix it.
That is a sticky situation for sure. Good luck. :)
Karin
Farmgirl Sister
# 18 :)
Wherever you go, there you are.
www.madrekarin.blogspot.com
www.madrekarin.etsy.com |
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Ronna
True Blue Farmgirl
1891 Posts
Ronna
Fernley
NV
USA
1891 Posts |
Posted - Jun 06 2008 : 4:37:05 PM
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Me thinks that J is jealous of what K has and thinks any mention of said items are making her even more jealous. From what you said, K does not flaunt anything, so is not aware of what J's problem happens to be.
I had this happen in my own family, with my sister. Mother told me the sister was jealous of what I had; remarried my first husband, who had been successful in his earnings and I no longer had to worry about keeping a roof over my head. For many years, my sister had more than I did and when the roles reversed, she couldn't deal with it.
I agree with Karin. Being in the middle is not a good place, though you surely did not ask to be there. Regardless of what you would say to either one, you will come out being the bad person. I was in the middle, trying to make peace between mother and the same sister for most of my life. When I got tired of it, I was then the bad one in the sisters eyes and likely it will not change in these lifetimes. Sad situation. I expect one or the other of the ladies will eventually drop out of the group, and everyone will lose. |
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Shi-anne
True Blue Farmgirl
596 Posts
Cheryl
Ada
OK
USA
596 Posts |
Posted - Jun 06 2008 : 9:28:41 PM
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Sam sorry you are going through a mess like this. I don't have any good advice. Being caught in the middle is a bad place to be, better that Lady J talk to Lady K, or simply accept her for who she is. Chances are Lady J is "hurting" in other ways and this is just a secondary problem. Could she be going through the change? Or maybe just overwhelmed at home?
I'll pray everything works out.
Farmgirls don't have hot flashes ~ They have power surges! |
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Across the Fence: Cold War in Hot Texas |
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Cold War in Hot Texas
