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Barnyard Buddies:  Putting Bagel to Sleep Tomorrow  |
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gafarmwoman
True Blue Farmgirl
244 Posts
Pam
Georgia
USA
244 Posts |
 Posted - Apr 25 2008 : 3:39:11 PM
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I'm so sorry Kathy. I had a cat, Tom, for eleven years and I know it is hard to lose a friend. I loved that little fellow so.
It was nice and thoughtful of the girl to give you that wonderful poem. My thoughts are with you.
You can never have enough friends.
Please come and sit a spell with me at Life on a Southern Farm
http://georgiafarmwoman.blogspot.com |
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country lawyer
True Blue Farmgirl
1022 Posts
1022 Posts |
Posted - Apr 25 2008 : 4:27:46 PM
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Kathy, I just saw your post. My heart is breaking with you and for you. Remember that many Farmgirl sisters are thinking of you. The only words I have for you are these "take time to mourn." (I say that because when I had to deal with a similar thing many well-intentioned friends encouraged me to "snap out of it...she was just a dog..." I came to realize that those friends don't know the depth of the relationships some people have with their pets. So, it's okay to mourn. And vital to your healing.)
Hugs from one animal lover to another. Rebekah |
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EnchantedWoodsGirl
True Blue Farmgirl
959 Posts
Kathy
New Jersey
USA
959 Posts |
Posted - Apr 25 2008 : 7:14:47 PM
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Thank you all for thinking of me and my Bagel. I don't think the reality of him being gone has hit me yet. But, strangely enough, I feel a sense of peace, like it was a decision that Bagel and I reached together. There is a special sense of knowing between us and our pets - all we have to do is open our hearts and listen.
I am used to seeing him with his nose at the door waiting for his daddy to come home and barking when I let the other dogs out - he loved to terrorize Freckles. So sad not to hear him bark - I am still trying to get over the loss of my shepherd June and sometimes when Bagel barked, he sounded just like the shepherd.*sigh*
Kathy of the Enchanted Wood
Farmgirl Sister #59
http://enchantedwoodmusings.blogspot.com/
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Beemoosie
True Blue Farmgirl
2077 Posts
Bonnie
New York
USA
2077 Posts |
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EnchantedWoodsGirl
True Blue Farmgirl
959 Posts
Kathy
New Jersey
USA
959 Posts |
Posted - Apr 26 2008 : 05:14:27 AM
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not a good morning, I haven't stopped crying this morning - I just want to hold him, to feel him in my arms and he is gone - it is quiet without him - I just feel so empty inside, hollow - I am sorry for all of you farmgals that lost pets too, it is so hard. I don't like this empty feeling, it seems to hurt more
Kathy of the Enchanted Wood
Farmgirl Sister #59
http://enchantedwoodmusings.blogspot.com/
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Alee
True Blue Farmgirl
22941 Posts
Alee
Worland
Wy
USA
22941 Posts |
Posted - Apr 26 2008 : 08:04:05 AM
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Kathy- I just read that poem and started crying all over for my Seanee dog because I know it is so true. We had to put her to sleep the week of my wedding and I know I was extra scatter brained the rest of the week, but sometimes I could have sworn that I could still feel her bounding down the hallway after me. I don't think she has quite looking after me since. I think Bagel and June are still with you *hugs*
Alee
Farmgirl Sister #8
www.awarmheart.com
Please come visit Nora and me on our new blog:
www.farmgirlalee.blogspot.com |
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bohemiangel
True Blue Farmgirl
2087 Posts
Bridget
Ligonier
pa
USA
2087 Posts |
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lisamarie508
True Blue Farmgirl
2648 Posts
Lisa
Idaho City
ID
USA
2648 Posts |
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CountryBorn
True Blue Farmgirl
1545 Posts
Mary Jane
New York
USA
1545 Posts |
Posted - Apr 26 2008 : 6:51:12 PM
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Kathy,
I am so sorry that Bagel is gone. What a beautiful dog he was. Corgi's are such happy little fellows. I know your heart is breaking now. I felt the same way. It took me a long time to get over it. I still miss my Barney.It will be a year in June. They just seem to always leave a footprint on your heart. God bless you Kathy.
Hugs, Mary Jane
There can be no happiness if the things we believe in are different from the things we do. Freya Stark |
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YiberryYadeeKarin
True Blue Farmgirl
343 Posts
Karin
Spokane Valley
WA
USA
343 Posts |
Posted - Apr 26 2008 : 8:57:17 PM
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{{{{{{{{{{{{{{ Kathy}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}
I read about Bagel being sick the other day when I signed on and was SO SAD to see your posting about having him put down.
I read your posting and the replies and started crying... Then I saw your pictures and that sweet, adorable face... I called my 12 year old daughter to the computer as she loves dogs, especially Corgis.
We both share your sorrow. If you're crying now, I'm crying right along with you.
Bagel had a good and happy life with you. He's in Doggy Heaven now.
Take care of yourself! Karin |
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EnchantedWoodsGirl
True Blue Farmgirl
959 Posts
Kathy
New Jersey
USA
959 Posts |
Posted - Apr 27 2008 : 07:34:13 AM
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Yes, I am still crying. This is going to be a long haul coming out of this - everytime I look at those pictures, taken the day I put him down, I can't fathom that he was so sick and the cancer ravaged him so quickly. I feel like a pack of nerves - can't sleep right, can't feel calm - just turmoil. I know some would say he was only a dog but they ARE MY CHILDREN. I feel like I have lost a child. Times are hard here as we have invested so much into all the sick animals within the last year - but they always come first.
Mary Jane was Barney a Corgi and what did he die from. If you told me before I apologize for having no attention span.
Thanks girls for being here for me, I have no one else.
Kathy of the Enchanted Wood
Farmgirl Sister #59
http://enchantedwoodmusings.blogspot.com/
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Alee
True Blue Farmgirl
22941 Posts
Alee
Worland
Wy
USA
22941 Posts |
Posted - Apr 27 2008 : 08:16:46 AM
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Kathy- *hugs* The best thing you can do is allow yourself to grieve. I don't think we ever forget our lost friends. My mom and I cried at each other the whole week of my wedding and then again a month later when I got to visit again. I guess what I am trying to say is we are here for you, and understand as much as we are able. *hugs*
Alee
Farmgirl Sister #8
www.awarmheart.com
Please come visit Nora and me on our new blog:
www.farmgirlalee.blogspot.com |
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Annika
True Blue Farmgirl
5602 Posts
Annika
USA
5602 Posts |
Posted - Apr 27 2008 : 08:24:51 AM
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Kathy I am the same with my fourfooted children. I am dreading the next one to go, and trying to spend as much time as possible with all of my fur kids. Give yourself time to hurt, grief just won,t go away overnight, in time it will soften and be more bearable. We are here for you. "HUGS"
Big huge hugs from a fellow animal lover and mama to fuzzy kids
Blessings
Annika |
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corporatefarmgirl
True Blue Farmgirl
389 Posts
Tamara
Pikeville
TN
USA
389 Posts |
Posted - Apr 27 2008 : 08:47:17 AM
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Kathy - How very sad for everyone. I have tears in my eyes as I read the posts. Please know that we are thinking of you and surrounding you with {{{{{HUGS}}}}
Tamara
http://smallfarm.about.com small farms give big benefits
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EnchantedWoodsGirl
True Blue Farmgirl
959 Posts
Kathy
New Jersey
USA
959 Posts |
Posted - Apr 27 2008 : 09:34:49 AM
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My husband is hard on me(he works hard but is very hard on me - lacks a lot of emotion)- he has been annoying me all weekend - he is type A personality and really strikes a raw nerve with me - I do not live in the best of circumstances (marriage wise) thus my feeling the loss ever so much more. I stay for the "children" and with my fibro I do the best I can to make ends meet. I work from home (most of you know that I sell on Ebay have a used book business and write for money) and my dogs take up a lot of my time. When my fibro flares however I am not worth a sh** - If I did not take tranquilizers, I could not live here - my family are all dead so I am where I have to be - Just pray for my strength and my sanity. Hugs - I love you all so much!
Kathy
Kathy of the Enchanted Wood
Farmgirl Sister #59
http://enchantedwoodmusings.blogspot.com/
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Edited by - EnchantedWoodsGirl on Apr 27 2008 4:54:56 PM |
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CountryBorn
True Blue Farmgirl
1545 Posts
Mary Jane
New York
USA
1545 Posts |
Posted - Apr 27 2008 : 10:26:38 AM
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Kathy, my Barney was a big beautiful chocolate and tan dachshund.He was the sweetest baby I have ever seen. He was only 4 when diagnosed with the same thing your Bagel had, lymphoma. I was just stroking his ears and neck one day and found the big swollen nodes on in his neck (both sides). I was so terrified, I knew right away what it was and I just didn't want to face it. I did take him to the vets, and we tried what they call a quality of life chemo course. I choose this because I did not want him to be sick from a huge dose of chemo.He was diagnosed in August and died the following June.He did very well and had a really good normal 10 months, never lost his appetite that's for sure. But,when I took him to the vets for his once a month maintenance chemo he was just not himself that morning. I knew it was getting close. Especially when we pulled into the vets and Barney didn't start his usual whimpering(he did that from the time he was a puppy!) They took him and I gave him a big hug and kiss. They took a picture of him for their website. He was a very popular boy. I walked out the door and went home just came in the house and the phone rang. It was the vets office, Barney just closed his eyes and passed on. Kathy, it was a blessing though I didn't think so at the time. Your taking Bagel and lovingly sparing him the pain was the kindest thing you could have done for him. The vet told me that the end of life for lymphoma is not a kind one. She told me that they seldom go the way Barney did and it truly was a blessing. Know in your heart of hearts you did the right thing for your baby Bagel.I pray you will go to your cabin and just let yourself "be". It will take time but you will start to come back to yourself again. You will always remember your sweet Bagel. But, in time the pain of the last while will give way to all the happy memories you shared. Just remember that the last thing Bagel would want is you to be sad for too long. He loves you and will be so happy when you smile again. I truly believe we will see all our fur babies again one day. Blessing to you.
Hugs
Mary Jane
There can be no happiness if the things we believe in are different from the things we do. Freya Stark |
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Lainey
True Blue Farmgirl
2401 Posts
Elaine
Waco
Kentucky
USA
2401 Posts |
Posted - Apr 27 2008 : 3:20:11 PM
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Kathy,
Still praying here and thinking of you. Just take care of yourself and please take all the time you need to grieve and heal.
*Hugs*
Farmgirl Sister #25
http://countrygirldreams.blogspot.com/ |
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napafarmhouse1885
True Blue Farmgirl
208 Posts
diane
napa
ca
USA
208 Posts |
Posted - Apr 27 2008 : 3:48:30 PM
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kathy,
i am sending hugs and prayers to you from napa. i know what it is like to lose a beloved pet. i had a cat for 20yrs and we had to put her down due to cancer. my heart broke. my sister hugged me and told me that when we die all the pets we ever had in our lifetime will be waiting for us at the gates of heaven to greet us and show us the way...still provides comfort..and i never take my dog for granted..not for a minute..
remember, you are not alone.. you have hundreds of farmgirls sending you love and hugs.
best,
napafarmhouse1885
www.napafarmhouse1885.com
please visit my blog
www.napafarmhouse1885.blogspot.com
"Whatever you can do or dream, begin it"
Johann Wolfgang von Goethe |
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EnchantedWoodsGirl
True Blue Farmgirl
959 Posts
Kathy
New Jersey
USA
959 Posts |
Posted - Apr 27 2008 : 4:53:00 PM
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Having the fibro does not help - it only seems to intensify any stress that comes in my life - I will sleep well tonight and let the healing process begin.....I am best friends with the breeder where he came from and maybe towards the end of the year I will get another corgi - she sells the best corgis and I trust her and she feels so bad but I do not think cancer is to blame on anyone- Funny story about that is the first dog I bought from her was born the day after my sister died - Linda, the lady I bought my corgi from is as old as my sister would be - we have never lost touch even though we are many miles apart, me in NJ and her in Iowa - I honestly believe that people come into our lives for a reason, and also pets - if I had not taken in Bagel as a border and then begged for him to stay and not move to Hong Kong- he would have never touched my life as he has. All of your posts are helping me cope - Poor Barney - I feel so bad about that too Mary Jane - I just want to tell people to touch their dogs, get to know how their bodies feel - know what is normal and what is not - just like we touch our own bodies - poor little things can't tell us what is wrong or where they hurt.
Kathy of the Enchanted Wood
Farmgirl Sister #59
http://enchantedwoodmusings.blogspot.com/
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babysmama
True Blue Farmgirl
931 Posts
Elizabeth
Iowa
931 Posts |
Posted - Apr 27 2008 : 6:02:46 PM
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I am so sorry about Bagel and how you are suffering with him being gone. The worst thing about being a pet owner is that their life spans are so short compared to ours. It is so hard to let them go but it is also important to know that sometimes it is in their best interests not to let them suffer for our own benefit of having them near. I am glad that he had a good life with someone who loved him. HUGS to you and I hope each day is easier with more happy than sad memories.
-Elizabeth |
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shepherdgirl
True Blue Farmgirl
1008 Posts
Tracy
California
USA
1008 Posts |
Posted - Apr 28 2008 : 08:59:31 AM
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I like what Diane said-- about ALL our animals waiting for us at the gates of heaven!!! If that's the case, there will be a menagerie waiting for ME that would rival the population of critters on Noah's Ark!!! Oh what a happy thought!!! I have lossed a lot of animals over the years, but the pain never lessens no matter how many of them pass on.
I lost a dog to Lymphocarcoma at the age of 7. I'd had her since she was 7wks old. I had the same choice to make as Kathy and many of the other ladies here. It was a very sad time. And a VERY hard choice to make, but she was a good dog and I could not stand to see her suffer anymore.
My first clue to her illness was that she had gone suddenly, and totally blind. I asked the vet if I'd "Missed" anything regarding such a devastating illness, and he told me "no." He'd said that the type of cancer she had usually struck fast and hard and that there was little that could be done for it. When she stopped eating, (her most favorite pastime!) I knew it was time. I brought her home and buried her under the red rose bush that I'd planted for my mother a few years before, when SHE had passed away.
Each year that rose is always the FIRST to bloom, and the LAST to stop blooming-- sometimes in the dead of winter. I look at it as a sign that they are together in heaven and both of them are sending their love to me through the red blooms of that rosebush.
Take heart Kathy-- Bagel is no longer suffering and it takes true love to have the strength to let our beloved pets go in such a peaceful way. It's much harder for US than it is for THEM. After all, they are letting go of the physical pain, even though it causes great emotional pain for us. Think of him up there now-- running, playing and chasing all the other dogs. He's happy now and he would not want to know that your are here crying for him, but I know he understands. My thoughts and prayers are with you Kathy. Hugs--- Tracy |
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gardencottage
Farmgirl in Training
24 Posts
Kelley
Oxnard
Ca
USA
24 Posts |
Posted - Apr 28 2008 : 09:08:49 AM
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Oh I am so sorry for your loss!
We have had to make that choice and it's so terribly hard...
Thinking of you!
It is the sweet, simple things of life which are the real ones after all.
~Laura Ingalls Wilder |
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EnchantedWoodsGirl
True Blue Farmgirl
959 Posts
Kathy
New Jersey
USA
959 Posts |
Posted - Apr 28 2008 : 09:24:05 AM
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Tracy your post is beautiful and made me cry. I guess it is selfish of me to want him here still instead of heaven but he will sure have a lot of friends there, my shepherd died of cancer last year and they loved eachother. Luckily, Bagel ate up till the end and he loved to eat, but his breathing was becoming more difficult and I did not want to see him suffer to breath - I could not bring him home to bury him, it would be too hard. When I lost my last corgi a day before her seventh birthday to a third degree heart block, my husband had to literally pull me off Emma Jean to bury her - it was a devastating loss - little Bagel reminded me so much of her, I think that is why he and I clicked so well.
Kathy of the Enchanted Wood
Farmgirl Sister #59
http://enchantedwoodmusings.blogspot.com/
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shepherdgirl
True Blue Farmgirl
1008 Posts
Tracy
California
USA
1008 Posts |
Posted - Apr 28 2008 : 12:01:14 PM
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I didn't want to bring my dog home at first, and have to face the task of burying her, but when I asked what they were going to do with her, and they told me, I couldn't leave her behind. They put her in a box for me (a BIG box-- she was a Springer/lab X) and put her in the trunk of my car. Before I even got home I knew just where I was going to put her. I backed the car up to the spot and started digging, but there were a lot of tree roots I had to hack through and it was quite a struggle.
My dear husband (who's NOT an animal lover and doesn't understand my passion) watched me struggle for awhile, asking me "Why don't you just bury her somewhere else?" I told him "No! she's going to rest here." He knew I was determined, so he took the shovel from my hands and dug the hole as deep as the roots would allow and put her, box and all, in the hole for me.
I've never loved another human being as much as I loved him in that moment! Though, after nearly 19yrs of marriage and MANY critters later, he's still digging those holes for me. And STILL shaking his head, but never again has he asked me "Why don't you bury them somewhere else?" when he sees me digging with that shovel. He just lets out a sigh and takes it from me if I can't do it myself.
Oh Kathy, it was not my intention to make you cry! I just wanted to let you know that your little buddy is VERY happy now!!! He misses you too, but he's happy and he's spending his time making some new friends until he sees you again! Hugs--- Tracy |
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EnchantedWoodsGirl
True Blue Farmgirl
959 Posts
Kathy
New Jersey
USA
959 Posts |
Posted - Apr 28 2008 : 2:18:23 PM
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I had Bagel privately cremated to be returned to me - when I die it is my wish to have all my animals ashes and mine mixed together and then returned to the earth (also my dad's ashes will be mixed in). Talking about digging holes, we buried my minature horse here - looked like a scene from the movie Goodfellas.
Kathy of the Enchanted Wood
Farmgirl Sister #59
http://enchantedwoodmusings.blogspot.com/
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Barnyard Buddies: Putting Bagel to Sleep Tomorrow |
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Putting Bagel to Sleep Tomorrow
