Author |
Across the Fence: Is this rude? |
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babysmama
True Blue Farmgirl
931 Posts
Elizabeth
Iowa
931 Posts |
Posted - Dec 08 2007 : 6:50:39 PM
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I am pregnant so don't know if I am overeacting so want your advice. My Grandma mentioned to my aunt that one of the name choices I like is Josephine. My aunt posted on our family website if this was true and to really reconsider and assure her that it wasn't true since her grand-daughter (my second cousin) is named Josie. She says that it is confusing already with some of the similar names in the family (two second cousins are named Emily, my daughter and my cousin are named Rebecca, and so on). I have never been confused since when someone talks about them they say "Rebecca S..." or "Rebecca F....". Is it rude of her to tell me to reconsider our name choices, especially when her grand-daughters name is Josie and not even the full Josephine. Please give me advice!! -Elizabeth |
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Maryjane Lee
True Blue Farmgirl
2195 Posts
Maryjane
CA
USA
2195 Posts |
Posted - Dec 08 2007 : 7:14:37 PM
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It wasn't very nice for your aunt to make it so public. If your heart tells you to name your baby Josephine, do so. It always works out. Josephine is a beautiful name.
Hugs, Maryjane Lee Farmgirl Sister #44
The Beehive Cottage~est. 1971 Sisters on the Fly #595
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DaisyFarm
True Blue Farmgirl
1646 Posts
Diane
Victoria
BC
Canada
1646 Posts |
Posted - Dec 08 2007 : 7:32:08 PM
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Well maybe over-reacting just a little, but that's just my opinion. Some family members, particularly older ones, seem to feel they are entitled to say such things and express their opinions freely. At least in my family they sure do! I don't think they mean it maliciously, they just figure young un's should listen to their elders. Geez, you should have heard my grandmother when we named our youngest Cassidy. She was horrified and let us know it! Too funny really. So my advice is to name your new little one whatever your heart desires...she's your baby!
Di
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MagnoliaWhisper
True Blue Farmgirl
2817 Posts
Heather
Haysville
Kansas
USA
2817 Posts |
Posted - Dec 08 2007 : 8:35:36 PM
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It's your daughter you get to choose the name. I would just "ignore" the aunt, like I didn't see what she posted, etc. I wouldn't engage her at all. |
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PlumCreekMama
True Blue Farmgirl
730 Posts
Heather
Iowa
USA
730 Posts |
Posted - Dec 08 2007 : 9:56:13 PM
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I had a similar experience when I told my mil that dh and I were thinking of naming our first child Trinity. She didn't say anything and made this face. It really turned me off to the name and we decided not to tell any of our name choices to anyone until the baby was born and named. We have done this with both of our children and it has worked out great. My advice would be to just ignore the aunt, name your baby what you want, and maybe consider not telling anyone your name choices.
BTW, back when I was younger and thought I wasn't going to have children, I named my dog Josephine, whose nickname is Josie. I love the name and kind of wish I would have saved it in case I have a daughter. It's a beautiful name! |
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Carol Sue
True Blue Farmgirl
4033 Posts
Carol Sue
Washingtonian
USA
4033 Posts |
Posted - Dec 08 2007 : 11:12:38 PM
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Elizabeth, Name that w0nderful baby what y0u and y0ur husband feel like is her name. Families can be s0 darned funny, but y0u were the 0ne gifted with this little 0ne and the resp0siblity is y0urs. BTW, J0sephine is a beautiful name.
listening to the quiet moments www.Quitemoments.blogspot.com |
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ArmyWifey
True Blue Farmgirl
712 Posts
Holly
Abilene
KS
712 Posts |
Posted - Dec 09 2007 : 06:44:05 AM
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It reminds me of Jo in Little Women! Don't you love people who tell you their opinions without thinking ? My second dd's middle name is Grace (to date she's the only Jessica Grace we've met in the slew of Jessica's) and my Mom said it sounded like an old lady's name - whatever! She also told me that my second ds's middle name was spelled wrong - HELLO?- it's Cuyler (pronounced like Kyler - it's Irish and a family name). While it was annoying I knew that was to be their names so if you and hubby like Josephine don't worry about it! If you have to just tell Granny that you love her and appreciate her opinion but this is your baby - she's already had her chance to chose names.
Blessings,
Holly
As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord!
http://timsarmywifey.blogspot.com
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willowtreecreek
True Blue Farmgirl
4813 Posts
Julie
Russell
AR
USA
4813 Posts |
Posted - Dec 09 2007 : 06:57:22 AM
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After watching the grief some members of both sides of the family gave my sister over her choice of name if and when Richie and I have kids I will NOT share the name until after it is legal and official. She is YOUR child and you have the right to name her what you want to. You could always suggesst to your aunt that she legally change her daughters name if she doesnt like it! Ha. Just kidding.
Farmgirl Sister #17 Blog www.willowtreecreek.wordpress.com Felt and Fabric Crafts www.willowartist.etsy.com www.willowtreecreek.com
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babysmama
True Blue Farmgirl
931 Posts
Elizabeth
Iowa
931 Posts |
Posted - Dec 09 2007 : 07:35:30 AM
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Thanks for the advice! I actually haven't told anyone names this time around, but I think my Grandma remembers when I was trying to choose between Josephine and Rebecca for our first so must have brought that up because of it. The whole reason I love Josephine is because I read "Little Women". But I just found it rude that my aunt acted like each name in the family could never be used more than once, especially since we come from a very large family and the second and third cousins rarely see each other so who cares if a name is used once or twice, especially when her grand-daughters name isn't even the full Josephine. Sorry, just had to vent!!! I do plan to keep name choices quiet until the birth annoucements are sent out and then it will be too late for anyone to complain! -Elizabeth |
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KYgurlsrbest
True Blue Farmgirl
4853 Posts
Jonni
Elsmere
Kentucky
USA
4853 Posts |
Posted - Dec 09 2007 : 07:41:46 AM
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I'm always amazed at the hulabaloo baby's name's cause...unless it's something like an acquaintance mentioned to me a few days ago (Elvis Leonard--to which I responded "different!"), I just feel like--it's your thing, your baby and your decision--even in that example.
Josephine is an incredible name--I have often thought of it for a little girl's name myself (too, because I love Little Women). Our nephew's name is Maxamilian and folks had a difficult time with it--people just call him Max, and it suits him...
Josie and Josephine are two different names--they'll get used to it, right? What else are they going to do????
Farmgirl Sister #80, thanks to a very special farmgirl from the Bluegrass..."She was built like a watch, a study in balance ... with a neck and head so refined, like a drawing by DaVinci"... NY Newsday sportswriter Bill Nack describing filly, Ruffian. http://www.buyhandmade.org/ |
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Annika
True Blue Farmgirl
5602 Posts
Annika
USA
5602 Posts |
Posted - Dec 09 2007 : 09:21:56 AM
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I think it is a lovely name. I, too, loved Little Women, as well as the history of the name. Very good choice in my mind. I don't want to sound mean, but I think she is being a bit silly about it.
Wishing you joy in small things and peace in your heart Annika http://innermountainmudhens.wordpress.com/ http://panzymoon.wordpress.com/ |
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farmgirl blessings
True Blue Farmgirl
777 Posts
Lea
TN
777 Posts |
Posted - Dec 09 2007 : 09:49:42 AM
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Who would ever think that baby naming could cause such a fuss?
When I was pregnant with our second son, we announced that his name would be Luke. In my 8th month of pregnancy, my husband received a call from a relative from the hospital where his wife had just given birth. He said, "We've decided that we would like to name our son, Luke. Would you consider changing your son's name? We don't need two Luke's in the family." Can you imagine? My husband kindly told him that Luke was such a lovely name and our son had already been named though he hadn't arrived yet, and we welcomed sharing the name if they saw fit to name their son the same. Well, they didn't. They made their son a junior. And all was well.
But we still laugh when we remember that story.
Josephine is perfectly elegant. Shame on your auntie for assuming she has a right to dictate your child's name. But they do try sometimes! I'd just smile, not cause a fuss, and name that dear one whatever your heart desires!
Blessings, Lea www.farmhouseblessings.blogspot.com "He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep to gain what he cannot lose." Jim Elliot |
Edited by - farmgirl blessings on Dec 09 2007 09:51:28 AM |
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AmyEllen
True Blue Farmgirl
235 Posts
Amy
McPherson
Kansas
USA
235 Posts |
Posted - Dec 09 2007 : 11:17:58 AM
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I used names that I loved for my kids. No one minded and through marriage and everything, we now have 6 Davids, my son, my brother and brother in law, father in law, a nephew, and an uncle. LOL. We have 3 Jon or Jonathans, my son, a brother in law, and a cousin. When you have a big family, sometimes you get repeats..... So if there is only one or two others your doing far better then my family, LOL.
I would encourgae you to use the names you love for your children. Hugs Amy
http://lifenkansas.blogspot.com/
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kissmekate
True Blue Farmgirl
890 Posts
Kate
Delano
Minnesota
890 Posts |
Posted - Dec 09 2007 : 8:56:31 PM
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Hon, she is your baby. Name her what you want. She may make her appearance and not even be a Josephine. She may be a Lauren or a Teresa or whatever...
Like Diane said, she is an old lady and thinks she needs to offer her two cents. Just let her say it, and name her what you want and what suits her.
Don't miss out on a blessing, just because it isn't packaged the way you expected. ~MaryJo Copeland |
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Aunt Jenny
True Blue Farmgirl
11381 Posts
Jenny
middle of
Utah
USA
11381 Posts |
Posted - Dec 09 2007 : 11:09:12 PM
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I agree...your baby..you get to pick the name..it WAS rude of your aunt to make a public fuss. We have 3 girls named Erin all on my husband's side of the family (including our youngest daughter) until they get married they all even have the same last name (and there are two of them here in THIS town)but we have fun with it..we have Big Erin, Medium Erin and Little Erin. Our Erin (Little Erin) was adopted and of course I may not have chose that name, but sure would not feel bad about her having the same exact name as two of her cousins! If you love a name and you know it is the right name..go for it!!
Jenny in Utah Proud Farmgirl sister #24 Inside me there is a skinny woman crying to get out...but I can usually shut her up with cookies http://www.auntjennysworld.blogspot.com/ visit my little online shop at www.auntjenny.etsy.com |
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Annab
True Blue Farmgirl
2900 Posts
Anna
Seagrove
NC
USA
2900 Posts |
Posted - Dec 10 2007 : 03:26:59 AM
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Better a pretty name like this than one your daughter will be potentially teased about when she gets to school.
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paradiseplantation
True Blue Farmgirl
1277 Posts
julie
social springs community
Louisiana
USA
1277 Posts |
Posted - Dec 11 2007 : 07:53:08 AM
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I love the name Josephine! I say go for it, and pay no attention to the older segment of your family. They'll love that baby regardless.
from the hearts of paradise... |
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bohemiangel
True Blue Farmgirl
2087 Posts
Bridget
Ligonier
pa
USA
2087 Posts |
Posted - Dec 11 2007 : 09:39:01 AM
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Honey I can see your side easily. Be glad you all have good communication though! Do what you want and know is right:) so that you are happy. They will understand eventually. XOXO
**~~Farmgirl Sister #60~~** "... to thine ownself be true." http://liggygirl.blogspot.com/
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Peanut
True Blue Farmgirl
603 Posts
Jennifer
Waverly
Virginia
USA
603 Posts |
Posted - Dec 11 2007 : 10:44:07 AM
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We're going through the baby-naming gauntlet now. We like family names, but we're afraid of hurting feelings if we don't use names from one side of the family or the other. Fortunately, we want a big family so hopefully we'll cover all the bases!
"What is a farm but a mute gospel?" Ralph Waldo Emerson |
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Beach Girl
True Blue Farmgirl
111 Posts
Vanessa
Williamsburg
VA
111 Posts |
Posted - Dec 11 2007 : 2:37:41 PM
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I have nothing to add, just agree with all that has been said.
When I was pregnant with my second son and my sil was pregnant with her second child, she knew that she was having a girl and had decided on Kathryn as a name (I didn't know that). So at some family event, she asked what we were going to name ours and I told her that if it was a girl it was going to be Katherine (after my grandmother). She then informed me that her baby was going to be Kathryn and it would be too confusing for me to name my baby the same even though it was a different spelling. Fortunately, I had a boy, so the problem was solved. However, I would have stayed with Katherine, as my grandmother was very dear to me.
Name your baby whatever you want with peace in your heart!
Vanessa
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sunshine
True Blue Farmgirl
4877 Posts
Wendy
Utah
USA
4877 Posts |
Posted - Dec 11 2007 : 3:48:50 PM
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It is your baby pick any name you want. You and the child have to live with it not the Aunt and it truly isn't any of her business in the first place. There are lots and lots of people in my family with the same name. I have at least 10 relatives name Mary as their first given name or John ( 4 of those) and 4 scotts and so on. We always know who we are talking about because of the context of the discussion happening. If your aunt is to lazy ( excuse me on that) but it is lazy if you can't follow a conversation close enough to know whom you are talking about why are you in the conversation in the first place. My Grand mother is Mary so is my mother and her sister so there are two sisters with the same first name my sister is mary I have to cousin in laws name Mary and the list goes on and on My father is John , my brother is john, my grandfather is john I have two nephews named john ( one is actually Johnathan) but still pretty much a john name. None of us care the people like their names alot of them to help stop the confusion (but their usually isn't confusion the content thing again) go by middle names and no one minds all good.
have a lovely day and may God bless you and keep you safe my bloghttp://sunshinescreations.vintagethreads.com/ my web store http://vintagethreads.com/ |
Edited by - sunshine on Dec 11 2007 3:50:47 PM |
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Across the Fence: Is this rude? |
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