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Family Matters:  Wish my dad wasn't alone-venting-kinda weird  |
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MsCwick
True Blue Farmgirl
775 Posts
Cristine
Farmville
Virginia
USA
775 Posts |
 Posted - Sep 26 2007 : 09:53:21 AM
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OK I know this sounds weird, but I don't have any other family members to consult and ask this question, so I'll just wing-it and ask here.
My dad is the sweetest person in the whole world. He really enjoys all the stuff here that we talk about(minus the sewing ;) He's been out on dates with people, and well, you know how that works out. So He's been through the dating section of the newspaper, and married women seem to love him(weird). My dad raised me, and got divorced from my mom when I was 9, so he's been alone for a long time. He got remarried, but she didn't work out too well, for she was aparently hanging onto baggage from her first husband. It makes me feel so bad that I am so happily married, and my dad who is sooo wonderful cannot find a single soul to spend his later years with. Unfortunately he is an over the road truck driver who is gone Mon-fri. I have to help him with his dog, and depositing his check and running errands for him, and he feels so bad that I help him out, but I have to, cuz he's MY dad.
So I'm not posting this like I'm trying to find a lady HERE for my dad, but I just wish I could come across someone that he would enjoy hanging out with...does that make sense? Where would a 25 year old look for a woman for her dad? If ya'll think it's not my business, that's ok too, because I'm torn as to whether or not to persue my idea. |
Edited by - MsCwick on Sep 26 2007 11:03:18 AM |
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Alee
True Blue Farmgirl
22941 Posts
Alee
Worland
Wy
USA
22941 Posts |
Posted - Sep 26 2007 : 11:39:46 AM
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Has he tried the online sites like eharmony? I have a couple of friends who met that way. Otherwise I would be as stuck as you! Good luck to your dad though!
Alee
The amazing one handed typist! One hand for typing, one hand to hold Nora!
http://home.test-afl.tulix.com/aleeandnora/ |
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Hideaway Farmgirl
True Blue Farmgirl
1553 Posts
Jo
Virginia
USA
1553 Posts |
Posted - Sep 26 2007 : 12:10:33 PM
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It must be tough for him if he is on the road all week long, too. Don't we have a lady trucker on this sight...maybe she would have some ideas.
Are there weekend activities he can get involved in where he would meet people with similar interests? How far away from retirement is your dad? At that point, he might have more time to get involved in things that would bring him into contact with more people.
Jo
"Wish I had time to work with herbs all day!" |
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KYgurlsrbest
True Blue Farmgirl
4853 Posts
Jonni
Elsmere
Kentucky
USA
4853 Posts |
Posted - Sep 26 2007 : 12:18:04 PM
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It's not weird for you to think that he deserves someone--my mom is in the same boat, only she's been widowed for 15 years. She really has never made an effort TO find someone, but not because she's so grief stricken or anything. She comes from a long line of independent women, and I guess that's just the way she is. Every once in awhile, she'll make a comment about someone being nice looking, or "if he lived closer, I'd ask him to go dancing with me" (about my friend, Ron's, dad, who lives in FLORIDA), but she really doesn't make a conserted effort and I typically stay out of it.
A few years ago, she thought she'd try the adult singles ministry at church, and those women about ripped her hair out! She said there was ONE man in a group of 12 women, and all these old hens had their eyes on him, and she was TOTALLY unwelcome, so she got the vibe and never went back. I asked her who the "hot catch" was, and she said, "oh, you know him--he always wears those terrible white socks with his loafers...well, those gals can have at him!!!"
She was somewhat grossed out with her older sister and her "gentleman friend" and the relationship they had. She just couldn't imagine someone sharing her house again, or her bed, or her food, or whatever. She's a little different, I'll give you that. I think, when she thinks of it, she's looking for some companionship, but nothing else.
Does anyone have a single father or brother who's in his mid 50's who looks and acts like George Strait? I think I could coax her on that one!!!
"She was built like a watch, a study in balance ... with a neck and head so refined, like a drawing by DaVinci"...
NY Newsday sportswriter Bill Nack describing filly, Ruffian. |
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MsCwick
True Blue Farmgirl
775 Posts
Cristine
Farmville
Virginia
USA
775 Posts |
Posted - Sep 26 2007 : 2:51:20 PM
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Some of my dad's weekend is consumed with working on his truck. He owns his own truck and trailer, so he has to grease things, and fix things. But he really enjoys taking care of things, and he takes such great pride in having a nice truck.(he ought to since he spends the week in it). He spends a lot of time gardening, but the place he lives is right near the highway, and very convenient for keeping the truck and working on it. He's not too enthused about where he lives right now...
So on to retirement in 515 weeks. Yes, that's almost ten years, but that's the plan. He just bought 16 acres on a small river, and DH and I are going to help him build a log cabin. Dad has it all planned out that if he works really hard, that everything could be almost paid for by the time his Social Security starts.
My dad and I both and perfectly content to be alone. I'm sure I got that idea from him, but he can cook and clean, and his house is immaculate, so in that aspect, he's independent. He actually has a beautiful and very sweet lady friend but she has a crappy BF and views my dad more like her brother than a potential mate. Dad would make a good homesteader. And he has come across women that he just enjoyed chatting on the phone and going to dinner with. He's not terribly adventurous. My mother took a lot of joy that we both had, and together, we have had to work on happiness. So when he's down, I have to have a talk with him, and when I'm down, he has the talk with me. He's too smart to not be able to figure out somewhere to find a friend at. I'm not even sure he would like to actaully be married again, but like Jonni said, it's more about companionship...someone to grow veggies for, or someone to care for...
It's really sad to see someone who wants so bad to care for and give to others, but there's no recipient, and no one to reciprocate the efforts...
He should be about to Tampa right now. It's almost 6pm....unload in the morning, and on the way home in the afternoon...
I really appreciate ya'lls sympathies and ideas...
Critine |
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Kathie
True Blue Farmgirl
2436 Posts
Kathie
Thonotosassa
Florida
USA
2436 Posts |
Posted - Sep 26 2007 : 5:29:46 PM
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Cristine what a Sweet Daughter you are!!
It is so great that you want your Dad to be happy ..
It's normal for us to want our Parents to be happy.. & Not be alone.. & share their lives with someone else too..
Especially since You yourself do have someone in your life that you share everything with..
It would be perfect if Dad did too..
So many times I wish my Mom had someone.. She & her Sisters are all in Illinois together just becoming all old & mean tohgether! I know they have to REALLY get on each others nerves sometimes!! The Three of them!! But then I think no.. they are probably so set in their ways now.. They'd be so hateful they wouldn't be able to along with anyone else!!
Who knows.. i think she must get lonely sometimes though..
Who Knows huh??
Tampa though!! Dang Little Girl!! I'M In Tampa!!
Does he make it here very often? You should try to plan on coming with him now & then.. Ask him if he can allow for some extra time once & we'll meet for dinner before he has to do that drive back!!
See what he thinks.. or if your even allowed to do that.. May be alot of fun!!
ROAD TRIP GIRL!!!
Take care..
& Lots of love Little Sister!
Kathie
In a World Where you Can Be Anything, Be Yourself.. |
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Tina Michelle
True Blue Farmgirl
6948 Posts
Tina
sunshine state
FL
USA
6948 Posts |
Posted - Sep 26 2007 : 5:35:10 PM
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Cristine, does your dad like to dance? maybe there's some sort of dance hall around there that he can take dance lessons at, or that sort of thing.
Country dancing or shoot... even ballroom dancing.
what about this website called Farmers Only. It is a match making site geared towards farmers/gardeners/folks that love the country.
http://www.farmersonly.com/
~Seize the Day! Live, Love, Laugh~
visit me at:
http://gardengoose.blogspot.com/
and at www.stliving.net
you can also check out my etsy shops at:http://GardenGooseGifts.etsy.com |
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janetinva123
True Blue Farmgirl
363 Posts
Janet
newport news
va
USA
363 Posts |
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kissmekate
True Blue Farmgirl
890 Posts
Kate
Delano
Minnesota
890 Posts |
Posted - Sep 26 2007 : 8:36:36 PM
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Speaking as someone who has been on my own for over ten years, your Dad will probably appreciate you trying to help, but this is something you have to let him do himself.
Also, I have tried several online dating services before, and most were duds. Just horny creeps. I have had more luck just meeting men when I am out and about, which isn't very often, but I am not necessarily looking either.
Don't miss out on a blessing, just because it isn't packaged the way you expected. ~MaryJo Copeland |
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Family Matters: Wish my dad wasn't alone-venting-kinda weird |
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Wish my dad wasn't alone-venting-kinda weird
