| T O P I C R E V I E W |
| candismom |
Posted - Dec 06 2006 : 5:52:24 PM
Ladies,
I am at a lost at what to do. It seems that the past couple of swaps I have had a couple who didn't follow through. I am sad about this.  To me this is stealing . I just can't understand why people do things like this.Would some one please help me figure out how to prevent this? It seems to be new ladies that come on and then leave quicky. I am thinking about not allowing new people to sign up for a swap till thay have been around a while.
Thanks for your help.
Hugs,
Elizabeth |
| 25 L A T E S T R E P L I E S (Newest First) |
| daffodil dreamer |
Posted - Dec 10 2006 : 10:37:35 PM
Hi all,
I have been in a few swaps now, and for the first two I entered, didn't receive anything back and no word from the girls involved. This was a bit upsetting (especially as it was the cookbook swap and cookbooks are heavy and expensive to post!) But my first swap partner came through with a lovely gift after a while (still haven't heard from the second, although I know she is going through a rough patch at the moment, so have decided not to bother her with it).
I didn't want to let this put me off though, as it was such fun making up the parcels. So kept going with the swaps and my last one (in the tea towel swap) made up for all the problems from earlier ones! So I'm still joining up.
I guess the only issue with sending to one person for them to distribute is that you are paying for postage twice (once to send to the organiser and then sending them money to send the packages back out). I think I would rather swap direct (more personal that way - as I like to include little extras) and risk missing out now and then.
Just my thoughts - best wishes to all,
Jayne |
| happymama58 |
Posted - Dec 10 2006 : 11:05:13 AM
I participated in the holiday swap here and on the 3rd or so month/event, I didn't receive anything. I was disappointed, of course. I didn't really know what to do, though. I didn't want to contact the organizer because I know whoever is handling everything is not responsible and I hate to burden them. I didn't contact my swap partner because no matter how I worded it in my head, it didn't sound right. So I simply let it go.
I do owe someone buttons from an "individual" swap, and she has been so sweet and patient, waiting for me to find my buttons as I get things out of storage. God bless her!!
Do I have any suggestions? Not really, but I do understand and wish there was a perfect solution somewhere.
Some people search for happiness; others create it.
http://happymama58.typepad.com/my_weblog/
Please visit me at www.marykay.com/pmiinch |
| therusticcottage |
Posted - Dec 10 2006 : 10:14:25 AM
My personal opinion is that a Farmgirl should not be excluded just because she's new. If they request to join and the swap isn't closed then they should be allowed. We were all new once.
On the other hand, if a committment is made to be a part of the swap and the person doesn't follow through that's another story.
Just my .02 worth!
The Rustic Cottage Etsy Shop http://therusticcottage.etsy.com
Visit my blog! http://nwfarmerette.blogspot.com |
| lilpunkin |
Posted - Dec 10 2006 : 06:35:47 AM
For myself I haven't entered any swaps as of yet. (except the card exchange) One because I don't always have the time to devote to it and two because some of the swaps I don't qualify for, meaning that like for a knitters swap or an apron swap. I dont knit and I dont make aprons...yet! Although I would love to join every swap, I just know my limitations on the time I have or what I can do. I feel bad that not everyoen knows their limitations and they don't follow through.
lilpunkin
Life isn't measured by how many breaths you take, but by how many moments take your breath away. |
| JenniferJuniper |
Posted - Dec 10 2006 : 06:17:27 AM
Perhaps it would be useful to have a "Swap Partner Report Card," similar to eBay's feedback forum but much less intricate - maybe just a page where you can leave a "grade" about timliness for the person via their name? i.e., A for "super quick delivery", F for "never received it after multiple emails to ___."
I also would like to participate in a swap, but being rather new & not knowing the ropes it's kind of intimidating.
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| sewgirlie |
Posted - Dec 10 2006 : 05:01:00 AM
Hi Elizabeth:
I hope you know that no one holds you accountable if someone in the swap doesn't follow through. As the leader of the group it would be a lot of pressure and we take it to heart if everyone does not do their share. No one blames you for it...trust me. :) Sheryl-lyn
Enjoy your weekend (what's left of it anyway!!) |
| candismom |
Posted - Dec 09 2006 : 9:30:51 PM
Thanks everyone for your comments. I feel much better. I am so sorry I ruffled so many feathers. Being a hostess isn't easy. Don't worry I haven't let a few people cloud my judgement of new people. By new I meant people with under 5 post who we never see again for whatever reason. I am a very fair person. All I ask is that people commuicate with me.
Let me know what is going.
Hugs,
Elizabeth |
| candismom |
Posted - Dec 09 2006 : 9:23:37 PM
Hi Susan,
We started the sign up over to make it fair for everyone see the new sign up post.
Hugs,
Elziabeth |
| mommom |
Posted - Dec 09 2006 : 8:38:26 PM
I signed up for the fat quarter swap and I do hope that I'm not behind or holding anyone back as I haven't received any other information yet! Please let me know. I couldn't stand to be a bad apple! Susan |
| sewgirlie |
Posted - Dec 09 2006 : 7:58:43 PM
I am fairly new to the forum and would have hated to be left off because of that (even though I understand it in principal). I did notice that when people did not get theirs or if they hadn't yet arrived, that others on the forum immediately offered to take up the slack. That good will is worth the risk of a swap or two gone bad. Someone doing the wrong thing always makes the generosity in the others shine. It might be worth it. Thank you again for EVERYTHING you did for us Elizabeth!! |
| Leezard |
Posted - Dec 09 2006 : 07:07:30 AM
I understand your concern Elizabeth and I think that it would be fair to set up some kind of limits as in time on the board or something of that sort. I know it may not seem fair to newbies but I guess it's one of those life things and with the person who's in control of the swap making the rules that's just how it goes. It's unfortunate that people sign up and don't follow through but when it's clearly appearing to be newbies who aren't active on the board and you just can't get any contact from them it's something to consider. Maybe if the newbie, that's no up to the true blue point yet, contacted the swap leader and expressed their interest beyond just posting in the thread that could help too.
http://ruby--slippers.blogspot.com/ |
| candismom |
Posted - Dec 09 2006 : 05:40:30 AM
I am sorry if I hurt some newbies feeling with this post.I never meant to. It is just heartbreaking when I see people being hurt.
Some have ask how swaps work. It is simple. You read the post to understand the hostess rules and deadline. Then you sign up. After that you honor your commitment on time and if you can't then you let the hostess know. I hope this helps.
Hugs,
Elizabeth |
| candismom |
Posted - Dec 09 2006 : 04:49:51 AM
Hi Candace,
On the tea towel swap it was because you ask to join after I had assign partners.Once partners are assign I don't add more people. It is too confusing. I would be happy to included you in the next round in Feb if you would like.
Each of us has our own style of hosting swaps. My style is very organized, I like partners and a set deadline. I know life happens and that is ok. Just let us know.
I agrees we should first look at our limitations before committing. Some people may look at it as only a swap but I take it serious as I do all commitments. I know my partner is counting on me. I am very old fashion and my word is my bond.
Hope this helps everyone know me a little better.
Hugs,
Elizabeth |
| ponyexpress |
Posted - Dec 08 2006 : 9:04:50 PM
Elizabeth, I think this is a very realistic compromise and Jonni has the right idea in recognizing our limitations (time, talent and treasure) before committing to a swap. I've not yet participated - I'm still quite new to the forum - but I think it would be very interesting to have a partner. I'd read some past posts made by my partner to try to get a feel of who she is and what she likes, and then begin my project.
I'm glad you feel better about the process, and bless your heart for initiating these swaps!
Sandy in Missouri |
| sunshine |
Posted - Dec 08 2006 : 8:33:20 PM
Norkema I sent you an email let me know if you get it. Also go ahead an ask any questions of me that you want happy to answer
have a lovely day and may God bless you and keep you safe my blog http://sunshinescreations.blogspot.com
my web stores www.sunshines.etsy.com and http://vintagethreads.etsy.com
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| Norskema |
Posted - Dec 08 2006 : 7:48:49 PM
Can I ask a question about this please? I am new but I don't think that should disqualify me from participating in a swap. I had offered to join in the tea towel swap but missed the cut-off I guess or maybe because I was new I wasn't included. I don't really know. There was another person before me who also asked to be included. Maybe when someone drops out, you could contact folks like us who were willing to participate but didn't join in time.
Part of the problem of joining in a group (speaking for myself) is that you all seem to know exactly how a swap works and how to set one up, etc. I've asked a few times to be included in different swaps since I joined. I've contacted my local Farmgirl Chapters and can't get a response there either. There are groups of friends already formed and like 'real life' versus 'cyber life' it can be hard to make friends and you don't want to feel like an intruder. I LOVE reading all the posts and threads but would really like to have a better idea of how to participate in some of these activities. Is it possible that the 'bad apple' didn't know how these swaps work either?
Rather than butt into an established group, I'd like to know how to start a swap. Would someone be willing to send me an email and explain the process? From these posts, it looks like there is more than one way to get one going. I'd really appreciate the help.
It will probably take me some time to rack up enough posts to be 'True Blue' by the message board standards. That doesn't mean I'm not true blue as a real person.
I don't know that I feel much better but I just wanted to put my two cents worth from one newer member's point of view.
Candace
Every way of a man seems right to himself but the Lord is the tester of hearts. Proverbs 21:2 |
| Aunt Jenny |
Posted - Dec 07 2006 : 10:50:14 PM
I think that is such a good decision Elizabeth. It would be very hard to make an apron for someone that is "generic" enough for anyone. I love that we are communicating to decide colors and ideas and putting special goodies in just for that one person. Fat quarters wouldn't have to be as personal
Jenny in Utah
Inside me there is a skinny woman crying to get out...but I can usually shut her up with cookies
http://www.auntjennysworld.blogspot.com/ visit my little online shop at www.auntjenny.etsy.com |
| candismom |
Posted - Dec 07 2006 : 3:13:45 PM
Ladies,
I have enjoyed each of your comments. This has been weighting heavy on my heart and mine. I know most farm girls are true blue. Every now and then as in all groups in life there is a bad apple. I decided after prayer and reading each of your comments that the fat quarter I will have them all mailed to me. But my other swaps the apron and tea towel swaps I will assign partners. Because to me part of the fun is receiving the package from a partner who has made the item for me,wrapped it and add her special touch. I belong to yahoo craft swap group and we send to a partner each month. As far as new people I will just take it case by case.
I feel so much better now.
Hugs,
Elizabeth |
| KitchenWitch |
Posted - Dec 07 2006 : 12:36:38 PM
Sorry to hear about your troubles, Elizabeth. As a newbie, I'd be sad to have to wait to participate in my first swap, but it would be worth it if it meant I had the group's trust and could put their fears to rest.
I see how designating one organizer may help to reduce the risk of someone being cheated (or cheating...), but that flies in the face of why I personally am so eager to participate in my first swap with my fellow farmgirls--there is almost no feeling like opening a special package containing something handmade from a kindred spirit. The only thing more fun is *sending* one--making it pretty, picking the perfect card, decorating the box, imagining your recipient's face as she opens it, etc. The package you share with someone else is a piece of you. What it looks like, how it's wrapped, what the card says, what the piece feels like, and, of course, the time and care put into the created piece--they are all part of the gift. I'd be sad if that experience had to be eliminated because everything was sent to one person just to ensure everyone plays by the rules. Even though it means keeping myself out of the swap until I am deemed "worthy", I personally prefer waiting to participate over the organizer option. That way my gift can be received in the spirit in which it was sent!
If y'all do decide to place a hold on participation, just let us know. The moment I'm able, I'm in.
XO,
K
Live deliberately, simply, abundantly. Remind your neighbors how to thrive. |
| bybiddie |
Posted - Dec 07 2006 : 12:15:28 PM
Oh, Elizabeth, it is so unfortunate that this happens. I ran into this with my tea towel partner - luckily, I was in the second group and there was a time lag. I checked to see if she had been on the board and she hadn't for about a month. No answers to my email either. Well, now you're my tea towel partner!!!! The swap mom idea sounds ideal, but is more work for the organizer. It goes against the FarmGirl credo (if there is one :o)) to take without giving back in kind!
xxxooo susan
Lovin' my life
http://BizzyHands.etsy.com |
| GRITSgal |
Posted - Dec 07 2006 : 11:28:06 AM
I m sad about that.. i m new myself and hope others don't abuse that honor system being in swap group. I m honest person myself and would love to spoil my sock swap partner.. :D |
| KYgurlsrbest |
Posted - Dec 07 2006 : 08:18:18 AM
I have to be honest--I've seen your posts and other's about swaps, and I've never joined in because I simply know my "limitations", and didn't want to let anyone down. I'm sorry that you're having these difficulties--the idea from Pony Express is a good one, I think.
I signed up for the Christmas card exchange, because I love to do them and knew that wouldn't be an issue for me (never fear, the are in the mail!!! :)
Just think of all of the roads there are...all of the things I haven't seen....yet. |
| ponyexpress |
Posted - Dec 07 2006 : 07:56:49 AM
When our weaving guild opens a swap - someone volunteers as organizer and swap-mom and guidelines are established so everyone participates on an equal level. For instance, a swap may be for a set of three towels, or one apron, or a package of 24 yo-yo's. Anyone can participate, but when we send in our completed items, we also send in money for the return postage. Postage costs can be pre-determined by the estimated weight of the returned items, or by the flat-rate postage of Priority Mail boxes. The swap-mom is investing her time and energy and goodwill, but hopefully is not out a lot of money for postage. To make sure the swap-mom is not overwhelmed, the sign-up list could be limited to a certain number of participants. I don't know of anyone who would want to receive 300 tea towels and have to package and mail them out! |
| sunshine |
Posted - Dec 07 2006 : 07:15:12 AM
I hope it all works out for you
have a lovely day and may God bless you and keep you safe my blog http://sunshinescreations.blogspot.com
my web stores www.sunshines.etsy.com and http://vintagethreads.etsy.com
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| candismom |
Posted - Dec 07 2006 : 07:03:21 AM
Thanks. I think the next round of tea towels and aprons I will have them all sent to me and I will swap them out. That way new people can join but if they don't sent they don't get. That will make it fair.
Hugs,
Elizabeth |
