| T O P I C R E V I E W |
| Mother Hen |
Posted - May 16 2009 : 11:56:15 PM
Well, some of you know that I took care of my MIL until her death last fall. Now my DH and BIL are haggling about the estate.
After my FIL died my BIL had my MIL change her will so he would get more, half of everything. Well my MIL had to take out a home equity loan on her house/land to cover her expenses as she didn't get enough social security to pay for everything. My DH sold his home and property down the hill and we bought a used double-wide and put in improvements on MIL's land and moved up on her property so I would be closer to care for her. My FIL asked my DH to promise to take care of his mother and NOT put her in a nursing home. My BIL wanted her in a nursing home 2 weeks after FIL died. My DH kept his word and we cared for her.
Now my BIL doesn't want to accept 1/2 of the debt on the estate he only wants his 1/2 of the assets and wants my DH to pay ALL the debt.
My DH hired an attorney to handle the estate as he figured his brother wouldn't be easy to deal with. The attorney told us last week that if the 2 brothers don't come to an agreement then the probate judge will say the whole estate has to be sold, the debts paid then split what's left. This would mean we take all of our farm equipment, our mobile home, all of our animals, and have to move to ......who knows where.
I know that everything belongs to God, and we've been praying for God to soften my BIL's heart, but my DH spoke to his brother tonight and he just isn't budging. This only means money to him, but it means our whole security to us, where we live, where we farm, our livestock, etc.
There is even more to this story.....my grandmother wants to move out here with us so I can care for her so she won't have to go into a nursing home, but now that is on hold too. She isn't really eating right anymore and needs someone to care for her. My parents are also looking to move out here, buy my MIL's house from my DH for the cost of his 1/2 of his mother's debt that my DH would incur. This would be an ideal situation for us as neither my DH nor I have good credit due to bad divorces in the past.
We really need prayers on this. I'm feeling so uncertain about our future. I'm beginning to plant the garden but wonder if I'll even be here to reap what I'm sowing.
Thank you girls for letting me come to you with what is really troubling me.
Cindy
FARMGIRLS CAN DO ANYTHING!!!
I will bless the Lord at all times: his praise shall continually be in my mouth. Psalms 34:1 |
| 11 L A T E S T R E P L I E S (Newest First) |
| Mother Hen |
Posted - May 21 2009 : 2:34:45 PM
Thanks Elaine, Suzie, and Sharon.
DH hired an attorney to represent him in this matter, to protect him really. He isn't wanting more than 1/2 like the will says.
I was talking to a woman in town here this morning and she said her husband's grandfather had a will in the same county as us with a stipulation that if any of his 3 sons contested it, he got $.01, yup, one cent. She said that it was about 14 years ago and that it was upheld in probate by the judge.
I think when it comes right down to it, that my BIL will accept his portion of the debt(albeit he won't be happy about it) as well as his 1/2 of the assets as he will sell the assets and still be ahead of the game.
Time will tell.
Cindy
FARMGIRLS CAN DO ANYTHING!!!
I will bless the Lord at all times: his praise shall continually be in my mouth. Psalms 34:1 |
| Calicogirl |
Posted - May 21 2009 : 07:38:31 AM
Cindy,
I am keeping your family and this matter in prayer. I pray that you will be able to stay and things would be settled in a fair way.
~Sharon
By His Grace, For His Glory
http://merryheartjournal.blogspot.com/ |
| SuzieQ |
Posted - May 20 2009 : 7:04:23 PM
Prayers to ya'll. Keep in touch and let us know what happens. |
| Lainey |
Posted - May 20 2009 : 11:49:21 AM
Cindy, that's a hard situation. I'm sorry you're having to go through it now, it must be stressful. You and your family are in my prayers and I hope it all works out for you all. I hope the judge upholds what your MIL put in her will.
Farmgirl Sister #25
http://countrygirldreams.blogspot.com/
An Angel says, 'Never borrow from the future. If you worry about what may happen tomorrow and it doesn't happen, you have worried in vain. Even if it does happen, you have to worry twice.' |
| Mother Hen |
Posted - May 19 2009 : 12:12:58 PM
There might be a "saving grace" written into MIL's will. Hopefully a judge will uphold it........it states "if anyone contests this will then I bequeath $1.00 and no more". Maybe we will come out alright after all. We'll see what happens and what the judge says.
We're still praying though!
Cindy
FARMGIRLS CAN DO ANYTHING!!!
I will bless the Lord at all times: his praise shall continually be in my mouth. Psalms 34:1 |
| Mother Hen |
Posted - May 17 2009 : 11:14:11 AM
Thanks girls, we really need all the prayers we can and I appreciate your support!! I'll keep you updated here on any new outcomes as they happen.
You know, when I moved here, I thought this would finally be my last move. It's such a beautiful place and my husband was born and raised here, he's worked at this property his whole life, even when he lived down the hill 1 mile. It's heartbreaking to think we might have to move.
Cindy
FARMGIRLS CAN DO ANYTHING!!!
I will bless the Lord at all times: his praise shall continually be in my mouth. Psalms 34:1 |
| kristin sherrill |
Posted - May 17 2009 : 09:38:03 AM
Hugs and prayers are headed your way, Cindy. You have such a caring heart, I just don't understand how some people don't. I hope all goea your way and ya'll come out on top anyway.
Hugs, Kris
Happiness is simple. |
| Alee |
Posted - May 17 2009 : 06:29:58 AM
Oh Cindy! My old neighbors were going through something similar. One thing you might try is buying the estate when it goes up for sale? Or at least the property part so you can stay put? I know you said you have bad credit, but perhaps you might still qualify when you point out that you would have half the purchasing price to put right back into the loan?
Alee
Farmgirl Sister #8
www.awarmheart.com
www.farmgirlalee.blogspot.com
www.allergyjourneys.blogspot.com
Put your pin on the farmgirl map! www.farmgirlmap.blogspot.com |
| Corinnelouise |
Posted - May 17 2009 : 06:21:01 AM
Praying for you Cindy. Have faith and go plant that garden of yours, you are sowing positive energy in the ground for yourself, your parents and grandmother.
God bless you.
Corinne
Sister # 101 |
| vintagediva1 |
Posted - May 17 2009 : 06:13:01 AM
Cindy,
I am praying for you and your situation.
I know how hard it is as I have a money hungry BIL also.
Just give it to the Lord.
Michele
www.2vintagedivas.etsy.com
Love that good ole vintage junk |
| Especially For You |
Posted - May 17 2009 : 05:00:55 AM
Cindy,
My prayers are with you!!!! Has your DH tried medeation (sp)? Isn't it sad when familys fight over money. My brother is like your BIL. Money hungrey. You are an wonder taking care of everyone just don't forget to take care of you!! I know I am not much help but just know that I am praying for you.
Blessings,
Tina |
