| T O P I C R E V I E W |
| tziporra |
Posted - Feb 04 2008 : 09:57:47 AM
Okay, I've changed my mind.
I birthed my first two babies in the hospital, and don't get me wrong -- it's an AMAZING hospital. They are totally committed to natural birth, have a lower c-section rate than anywhere in the country. I was never offered an epidural, the birthing suites are wonderful, the nurses are the best, etc., etc., etc. But I don't wanna go back. I can't handle the 14 minute car ride to the hospital (I know, I'm a WUSS). I don't want to have to arrange care for my children. I don't want the constant "when do we go to the hospital" question to be an issue. I just want to give birth in my ENORMOUS guest room in my basement.
Now. How do I convince my husband? He's dead set against it. I want him to read this book I've got (A Wise Birth, by Penny Armstrong with an amazing scientific argument why it's better to give birth at home) but he's in graduate school and works 60 hour weeks and hasn't got time to breathe let alone read anything. I need a succinct, compelling argument.
Ideas?
Thanks SO much,
Robin |
| 25 L A T E S T R E P L I E S (Newest First) |
| yasmine |
Posted - Jun 11 2009 : 04:06:42 AM
where did you read that , as I am super curious..How awful...maybe you have the link if its not too much trouble....
I am expecting our 6TH!!!! end of August, beginning of Sept. God willing, homebirth again, I hope... I hope... |
| NudeFoodFarm |
Posted - May 27 2009 : 2:23:55 PM
That is so Awesome! I just learned that Homebirthing is illegal in 21 states in the US. Can you believe that? If you get caught you can be penalized. I heard a story of a woman in Georgia, who was homebirthing with a midwife and needed to transfer and when they called 911 the police came and arrested them both, even as she was birthing.
Unreal.
I am so happy you free birthed and I look forward to hearing how great this one goes for you. I homebirthed both my babies and would have done it no other way.
Best,
h
Nude Food Farm
~Grown so good,
Dressing is Optional. |
| PineConeAcres |
Posted - May 27 2009 : 2:07:37 PM
I had my third at home unassisted.. I went to the hospital to tell them I'm in labour. I hate how the nurses are trained to believe their MACHINES and not the person talking. She was my third baby, I think I know when I'm in labour. Anyways, they sent me home. Three hours later I had her on my bathroom floor on towels. I live 30 minutes away from the hospital and I WAS NOT jumping in the car for that long after I was in hard labour.
It was the best experience I've ever had with birthing :) We tied the cord with new shoe laces (boiled in water) and that was that, lol. I live in Canada where we don't pay for medical for the most part.They didn't have midwifes covered until this year and I'm so happy about that :D I'm expecting my fourth Nov 9th. |
| idsweetie72 |
Posted - Apr 06 2009 : 4:18:48 PM
Congratulations! I am so proud of you! Your children are very lucky!
Mazy Day Farm |
| NudeFoodFarm |
Posted - Apr 06 2009 : 12:13:19 PM
I was looking back and found this thread! How cool to read the progress of Robin's bravery to do what she felt was best for her and her family. I loved the birth story. Robin, being how it all ended do you think you would do it all over again the same?
Best,
Heide
Nude Food Farm
~Grown so good,
Dressing is Optional. |
| Alee |
Posted - Jun 02 2008 : 07:51:49 AM
Congrats! Babies are so wonderful! I love that "baby" smell!
Alee
Farmgirl Sister #8
www.awarmheart.com
Please come visit Nora and me on our new blog:
www.farmgirlalee.blogspot.com |
| Tina Michelle |
Posted - Jun 01 2008 : 10:49:33 PM
congratulations!
~Seize the Day! Live, Love, Laugh~
visit me at:
http://gardengoose.blogspot.com/
and at www.stliving.net
you can also check out my etsy shops at:http://GardenGooseGifts.etsy.com |
| CountryBorn |
Posted - Jun 01 2008 : 7:54:44 PM
Congratulations Robin. I am glad you and your baby are doing well.
MJ
There can be no happiness if the things we believe in are different from the things we do. Freya Stark |
| tziporra |
Posted - Jun 01 2008 : 7:20:53 PM
No name yet! I'll post it after his bris.
Best,
Robin |
| yarnmamma |
Posted - Jun 01 2008 : 6:46:24 PM
Robin!  I read your whole birth story. I felt like I was right there with you. I have had 3 babies so I can remember.
Thanks soooo much for posting it for us.
Congrats and I am sure you and baby will be home and happy soon.
What is his name?
****************
"NEVER underestimate the power of a woman."
farmgirl #71 Linda in PA |
| mima |
Posted - Jun 01 2008 : 6:39:01 PM
Oh I'm sooo happy that the birth went well!!! Hope your little guy is better soon! congrats and lots of hugs!
"No pessimist ever discovered the secrets of the stars,or sailed to an uncharted land or opened a new heaven to the human spirit." Helen Keller
http://www.thebodyshopathome.com/web/dcole1 |
| tziporra |
Posted - Jun 01 2008 : 5:58:58 PM
Thought I'd share how it turned out!
Baby Boy's Birth Story
Thursday night I didn't sleep well due to intense abdominal (bowel) cramping. After spending a lot of time on the potty, I finally fell asleep at 12:30am, only to be back up at 4am for another hour on the pot. After I, er, emptied my system, the cramping gave way to spaced very intense contractions. Since they were too strong to sleep through, I timed them between 5-6am at about 8 minutes apart. At 6am Friday I woke my husband up and told him not to go to work because I was pretty sure I was in labor.
At 7am I called my midwife and labor doula. They were both in other births! My doula had limited herself to two births this entire YEAR since she returned to school, and they both ended up being on the same day (the other lady was two weeks early, and I was -- well, you know). We also called to have the tub set up and the lady arrived very quickly. Since I felt like I had a long way to go, I was comfortable with just hanging out on my own for the time being. I managed a little nap between 7 and 7:30, still waking up with each contraction.
Except that my husband refused to take the kids out of the house and leave me to labor alone! He was nervous despite my assurances that the labor was going nowhere fast. Finally I called my doula's backup and begged her to come just so I could get him to leave me and get some things done. The backup arrived around 10am (unbenownst to me, she was on her way to another birth as well -- there was pitocin in the water here on Friday). My husband finally took the kids, but with plans to return at 12:30 for naps. Shortly afterward, the backup midwife arrived to check me as well.
I was 3cm dilated, very effaced, with the baby's head extremely low in my pelvis (the midwives kept having to reach up and around the baby's head to find my cervix, which was very uncomfortable. The contractions were spaced out a little more -- about 15 minutes apart and very very intense. About this point my doula showed up and the backup left. The midwife recommended that I get some more rest and call back when the contractions were 5 minutes apart (they never actually came that frequently, so I didn't follow that advice in the end). I sent my doula home as well to get some rest after her alnighter at the other birth. I did set up a little pyramid of pillows and manage to cat-nap on all fours between contractions -- it amounted to about an hour total of sleep until I just couldn't handle waking up in the middle of a contraction.
A friend from the community had arranged to come attend the birth as well, and she came over at 3pm. We took a nice walk around the block, and the contractions picked back up to 6 minutes apart. Then my friend had to leave and go get ready for our Sabbath, so I called the doula back. I REALLY wanted to get in the tub at this point, so the midwife came back to check me. From this point out no one left again, since I was 6cm dilated and fully effaced.
I got in the tub, which was AMAZINGLY relaxing, but spaced the contractions back out to 15 minutes. Plus, I was feeling very very tired, which was discouraging, since I knew I wasn't very close to delivering and would need to keep my energy up. I had managed to eat some lunhc, but was now feeling pretty nauseus, and had a hard time even drinking the PowerAde that we had. So I got out of the tub and we took another walk at 7:30pm. This walk was much shorter, but it also sped the contractions back up to 6-8 minutes apart. On my way back from this walk I was feeling so tired and regretting not going to the hospital. I felt like I wasn't dealing with the contractions well at all, and even though they were so far apart, they were much much stronger than anything I'd experienced in my previous two births. I wanted to give up.
We got back to the house at about 8:30pm and my friend was there again. Hurray! The midwife checked my cervix again (so much for not wanting checks, eh?) and I was 8cm dilated. At that point I realized we wouldn't be transferring to the hospital, so I got back in the tub and tried to refocus on dealing with the contractions. They stayed about 8 minutes apart, even in the tub this time, and I labored there till 9:30 or so. Then I felt like I wanted to get out of the tub and to somewhere I would feel comfortable giving birth.
At this point my contractions completely changed. They started coming one right on top of each other, and were more in line with labor contractions I'd felt in the past. Although I was exhausted, I felt much better equipped to handle these kind of contractions, and even though I had a hard time with the "one right after each other" aspect, I felt more relaxed (but also scared of pushing, since that's the part I hate, and I had figured out it was probably going to happen soon.
I got on my great big log framed bed on all fours, resting on the birth ball, surrounded by my great team. The contractions were about every 3 minutes, but still much easier to deal with than the earlier labor stuff had been. I started vocalizing to work through them, and felt myself starting to want to push about 10:30. After backing off the pushing a couple of times, I realized that the only way I was getting the baby out was pushing it, and really got down to work. I felt a very strong urge to push, but it took many more contractions to get this baby out than the last one! I complained the whole time -- "nothing is happening, my pushing isn't doing anything, why isn't the baby coming out?" Altogether I pushed about 30 minutes, and the baby was born at 11:03.
I had asked to be coached to push slowly at the end, but I ignored the coaching because I just wanted the baby out so badly. Still, because it took many more pushes, he was born more slowly than the other two and I had only minor tearing, with no need for stitches. Daddy got to come see him right away, something that didn't happen in the hospital because they are always so busy doing stuff after the birth that he has to wait (I prefer that he doesn't attend the birth itself, and he agrees -- I like to be surrounded by women). My friend's twelve year old daughter had really wanted to watch the birth, and she cut the cord. I had been worried about having her there, but it was actually great to hear her get all excited when they could see the baby's head come out.
So now for the trying and difficult parts of the story....
Baby had to be transferred to the hospital the next day because he is respirating quickly. My midwives strongly insisted. And I feel like the hospital staff (in particular one neonatoligist we are assigned to) is very against home births and is punishing me to some extent for having the baby at home. We had to do a course of antibiotics even though there was no sign of infection because "it was a home birth". I wasn't allowed to breastfeed for the first 16 hours because he might aspirate. We aren't being allowed to go home after the antibiotics are done tomorrow because they want to make sure feeding is established and he's gaining weight. And it doesn't count that he's been gaining weight since they allowed me to start breastfeeding because he's also on an IV. And on, and on.
Thank G-d, they have a room here for me to board in, but it's on their grace -- if the labor and delivery people need it for a patient, out I go to sleep in the waiting room. Although it would be the same story if I'd birthed here -- they would have discharged me after 24 hours and I'd still be in the same room, I feel like I'd have more respectful treatment.
Wah.
Anyway, despite being stuck in the hospital, Baby is very healthy! He's respirating quickly for no apparent reason (which I'm told just happens sometimes). He's gaining weight and nursing vigorously. This too shall pass and be all a bad memory.
Best of all, he was born on his Daddy's Hebrew birthday, which is thrilling my husband to no end!
Best,
Robin |
| yasmine |
Posted - Feb 22 2008 : 11:37:09 AM
I shall pray for you to have a safe pregnancy and for God to bless your babe and keep him, or her , safe! |
| tziporra |
Posted - Feb 21 2008 : 8:53:05 PM
Yasmine,
No cravings with this one, unless general desire for protein food counts as a craving.... Passed my glucose screen, so now I'm officially cleared for a home birth, and all set for my first appointment with midwife on Tuesday. Yay!
Best,
Robin |
| yasmine |
Posted - Feb 19 2008 : 10:32:09 PM
yay!... nice time to have a baby!
Anycravings in particular? haha
I craved, what was it...watermelon and turkey sandwiches, and sweet stuff, we had a girl. |
| tziporra |
Posted - Feb 19 2008 : 4:26:36 PM
My due date is kind of up in the air. My date of late period and the day I /think/ I conceived indicate May 10th (which means May 17th if we base the date on 41 weeks, which is how long I went with my first two).
The early ultrasound says May 25th. Which would mean 1st of June or so. So who knows.... anytime middle to end of May I guess :)
Best,
Robin |
| yasmine |
Posted - Feb 19 2008 : 3:03:21 PM
robin, Im so excited for you! I could not really imagine having to move to an unfailiar place to birth my baby, AND PEOPLE DO IT ALL OF THE TIME. bUT A BIRTHING CENTER WOULD BE A GREAT CHOICE! I just feel that I would rather not bring my baby into the world at a place where sick people go to get well ...a hospital. not that I would not go if i HAD TO.
Really, homebirth is just the greatest.. Im very thankful. I hate driving anywhere so taking a trip to a place to deliver seems hard when I'm already in a fragile condition! HAHA
I did labor in our jacuzzi(sp?), which I did not do for any of the other births, just the 5th. What a great feeling of boyancy... i did not even know that the baby was being lifted up until I stood up to move to my room to deliver!
I would definately do it again.
My midwife said the only reason she moved me was because she said that she can't see how much I was bleeding.
When are you due? |
| tziporra |
Posted - Feb 17 2008 : 8:59:57 PM
Yasmine -- How embarrassing! Hi Yasmine's Mom! I think you are great!
I'm not ready to give up having babies either. Kids are AMAZING, and I would love to have ten -- I don't think I'll get there since I'm on number 3 and I'm already 31. But I tell myself I /could/ be lucky enough to still be having children in ten years and wouldn't that be a miracle?
The hospital where I delivered my first two children is wonderful, and my midwifery group there was amazing. I'd recommend this hospital to anyone looking for natural childbirth in a hospital/birth center type setting. It's the anguish of transferring to the hospital I'm trying to avoid by staying at home to deliver.
-- the 15 minute car ride to the hospital is 15 minutes of utter agony. Without a doubt this has been the most difficult part of childbirth for me to manage in the past -- harder than transition, harder than pushing. I do not want to get in the car
-- I do not like trying to decide when the time is right to make the transfer. Too early and you increase your risk of interventions. Too late and you'll have a home birth anyway :) My husband was very concerned about the transfer issue since this is our third and he's heard lots of stories about the catch-your-own-third-baby. Not that I think this will happen to me, but if it does we are much more prepared than if we'd planned a hospital birth (this was the argument that really sold him, BTW).
-- By having a baby at home I do not have to arrange childcare and backup childcare for my two older children. They will have someone to keep an eye on them, but there will be no interuption in their daily routine for mother heading to the hospital. This is a HUGE weight off my mind.
Addmittedly, we are in a blessed situation. We have an enormous wreck of a house, with a guest room where I can deliver that is twice the size of the hospital birthing suites. I can fit a rental birthing tub in the family room just outside, and we are having the tub delivered/filled/removed. My community makes dinners for mothers who have just given birth for two to three weeks, depending on needs, and a good friend has already offered to bring soup for everyone while I'm in labor.
My fantasy is that I will have this baby, crawl into the big bed and not need to leave it for four days. I understand there is a lot that can go wrong with that picture, but I am working on finding post-partum doula support or maybe just a temporary nanny who will do light housework that will make this a reality. I'd love to just cuddle in bed with all my kids, reading books and getting to know the new one without transferring anywhere.
I guess part of my displacement anxiety stems from my son's birth -- he was born at a very busy time of the month, and 8 hours post-partum the hospital needed my birthing suite for another laboring woman. I decided that rather than move to an overflow room, only to have to move AGAIN in 8 more hours, we should just go home. So I didn't really have any of the pampering hospital advantages, and I missed my older daughter the little time we were there. It wasn't the hospital's fault -- they have a huge birthing center, it was just everyone had their baby at once.
Best,
Robin
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| yasmine |
Posted - Feb 14 2008 : 2:33:11 PM
hey congrats on your pregnancy elizabeth!
robin, I dont think Im ready to give up having more babies. I love it!
On a side note, Faith, my mom, is a farmgirl too! She is actually just worried that I might not have such easy pregnancies, but she is totally supportive! she only had two and shes sorry about that.
BUT, Dad on the other hand is the one I have to watch out for! He freaks out every time Im pregnant. It takes him a while to warm up to me again every time... scary huh? But he's just wonderful after the fact. He almost cant look at me for a few months
I would love to have ten. wouldn't you? But Im not sure I can handle it! Im a little too relaxed when it comes to homeschooling already!
I get worried that my kiddoes will fail on there tests they have to take in 5th grade! haha ( I hope they read this) |
| babysmama |
Posted - Feb 14 2008 : 12:48:32 PM
I am pregnant with baby #3 and having a hospital birth, but with a midwife instead of a doctor. I love reading home birth stories and may consider it in the future but at this point I feel more comfortable with a hospital birth. I hear a lot of people saying they are more comfortable in their homes but the birthing suite where I gave birth last time had a wonderful whirl pool tub, soft lights, a comfy bed and chairs, etc. and seemed much more comfortable than our tiny bathroom, tiny bedroom, etc. I must admit, I also like to be pampered for that day or two in the hospital where food is brought to me and I don't have to clean up anything. I feel like if I were at home I wouldn't get that pampering.
By the way, have any of you read "The Compleat Mother" magazine? It is awesome and all about home birth, breastfeeding, etc.
-Elizabeth |
| tziporra |
Posted - Feb 14 2008 : 08:53:03 AM
Pish!
(can you tell I need work on the fifth commandment?)
Mom's are great, don't get me wrong. But my mother doesn't understand the large family thing AT ALL. She thinks only uneducated women with no access to birth control would ever have more than two kids, so I have to take everything she says with regards to pregnancy and childbirth with a heaping dose of salt. In addition, her pregnancies were heavily medically interventive, so she doesn't quite get the natural childbirth thing either.
I want to honor my mother, so I just try to avoid having these conversations with her. Instead, I have older women in my community who share my values (large families are a blessing from the Lord, natural childbirth, etc.) who I really look to for mentoring. They are a blessing!
There are two ladies in my community who have ten children -- they both had home births for their last child, both were 39. So don't give up on your blessings quite yet (unless that is what you really want to do).
Best,
Robin |
| yasmine |
Posted - Feb 14 2008 : 06:29:34 AM
sorry robin ! I guess thats my mom talking! she is getting worried for me after these 5 were born!
Not sure about that Amish question...
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| tziporra |
Posted - Feb 13 2008 : 3:35:53 PM
Hey! 31 is not "older"! :D
I'm 31!!!!
I think the risks that increase as you get older are those to do with the baby, not necessarily with childbirth itself. At least in my community, women generally have babies into their early forties (at home!).
But I read The Wise Birth and that mentioned that the midwife didn't take Amish clients who had ten children, but not why. Anyone know?
Best,
Robin |
| yasmine |
Posted - Feb 13 2008 : 09:05:31 AM
i had all 5 of our babies at home, kind of a neat feeling, having done that, but God is our strength. We have a midwife, competant , in my opinion, and I would not do it any other way. If God allows me to have another, I hope and pray I can have the baby at home again. Im 31, so Im getting older and therefore,with age, I hope that God lets me have another at home again instead of the hospital.
Believe it or not, although there is a time for medical intervention, it would personally be horrible for me to have to go to a hospital for a birth unless it was to save the life of our baby. I am truly thankful God has allowed my births to go well and I avoided the hospital. I do not appreciate them wisking the baby to immunize and pour stuff in her eyes, prick her heel,.. and so on.
If I ever have to birth in the hospital, I pray the God would protect me and especially , and the most importantly, my unborn baby. I feel as though I would need even more protection there!
I presented my husband with the facts at the beginning and gave him the pros and cons, he was happy with our decision.
BUT he is not a what-if kind of person . If you are or you husband is the kind that what-ifs all the time , mabey hombirth isnt the best for that type of person! |
| Alee |
Posted - Feb 12 2008 : 9:10:36 PM
I think you all are so strong and great. I really respect women who give birth at home.
My personal choice is to go ahead and go the hospital route. I might be a bit afraid, and as Tasha would say, I should trust my body and trust birth. However, as much as I trust my body and trust birth, my family has a history of pregnancy complications. Two of my older sisters almost died giving birth due to pre-eclampsia and we almost lost the babies as well. My other sister had a baby whose umbilical cord was too short to be delivered.
During my labor, Nora's heart rate dropped dangerously slow. My nurses were great in monitoring me and gave Nora plenty of time to recover. A tiny shot of Epi into my IV brought her heart rate back up until she stabilized. I also had some issues with my liver functions pre-pregnancy and I felt safer being monitored at all times.
When we plan on having another baby, I plan on having it in the hospital, but only one that is birth-friendly. Our local hospital encourages the use of Doulas and midwifes and will let you water birth, or have your midwife deliver too if you want. They just have a doctor on call in case the doctor is needed. I think for our second one, I will see if a midwife who is trained in fetal monitoring will work with me, that way I could have the best of both worlds, being at the hospital incase of emergency, but still having a doula and midwife.
Like I said before, I think homebirth is an amazing thing and I really respect women who go that route. Isn't it great that we have options in this day and age, and that birthing is no longer a scarey ordeal that women need fear?
Alee
Farmgirl Sister #8
Please come visit Nora and I our our new blog:
www.farmgirlalee.blogspot.com |
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