| T O P I C R E V I E W |
| happymama58 |
Posted - Jun 06 2007 : 08:24:24 AM
Ladies, I don't even know how to begin this. I left for a little over a month because there were some things I was/am trying to work out. I wanted then to share some things with you, but I was (still am, but . . .) somewhat scared to share so openly on a public forum. What will people think? That sort of thing. I've been struggling with so many things the last 14 months or so -- losing my job, selling our in-town home, living in a trailer, financial problems, the choas of living in a house while finishing it, dealing with partial empty-nest, etc., etc. It seems like everything has been a struggle. I don't think anyone who knows me "in person" has any idea how desperately I hang on. I'm better when there are people around, but it's still hard. It seems like tears are always just below the surface, that the littlest things are hard. When I'm alone, it takes nothing really for me to cry. My son has been home the last few weeks but is leaving again Saturday for summer school. I knew this weekend would be horrible; when he left after Christmas and again after Spring Break I really, really struggled. A few days I felt like I couldn't stop crying. I worry about what people will think but I just need somewhere that I can be open and not worry about keeping up appearances. I made a doctor's appointment with a new (to me) doctor (mine retired last summer), and I go today at 1:00. I'm sure he's going to tell me I'm dealing with depression (I don't know what else it could be), and I'm hoping he'll give me somthing to deal with this.
I feel so bad about not being part of this group for awhile, for leaving, and for now just coming back and dumping on you all. I can't explain it, but it was like I was just hunkering down and "hiding" from everything I could. I want to get back to "normal" and am going to do the best I can to just plow through. I'd really appreciate your prayers. Thank you!
Some people search for happiness; others create it.
Please visit me at www.marykay.com/pmiinch |
| 25 L A T E S T R E P L I E S (Newest First) |
| cinnamongirl |
Posted - Jun 21 2007 : 9:58:33 PM
Patti, Patti, thats what girlfriends are for no shame we all need someone to reach out to and lean on. Of course you are felling like you are its hard to see the light sometimes. But girlfriend it will shine and it will be brighter hang tough, stay focused on your goals. and ask the universe for what you need at the moment it will come. But remember the best shoulders to lean on are your girlfriends. One of us is always here!(Hugs) |
| Carol Sue |
Posted - Jun 19 2007 : 8:39:46 PM
Patti,
Thank you for being so honest and for the others ladies who are struggling with this as well. 3 years ago, because of overwhelming challenges with dh's family, I went in and talked to my doc. I did exercise and taking time for myself more and antidepressant, zoloft. Was doing better and the doc and I discovered when coming off of it that it was really helping me have far less episodes with IBS. So I still take it. I think truthfully it has helped with the paramenupause ups and downs as well.
Patti lots of hugs. Prayers are with you and thanks for being honest and allowing the rest of us to do the same.
Carol Sue
Life is short, enjoy every moment. |
| bramble |
Posted - Jun 18 2007 : 7:05:59 PM
Patty- I have been keeping you in my prayers and will continue to as you go through this. Good to have a doctor who listens and follows up, that is so important. I know you have a lot going on, but put yourself at the top of the list. Do you know that building a house ranks right up there with the most stressful life experiences we go through?! Kinda puts things in perspective huh? I am glad you are sharing with us and keep "venting" if it helps! We have all had those days , weeks, months and years so don't be shy, especially if it helps! Hugs to you and I hope you are feeling better very soon.
with a happy heart |
| mikesgirl |
Posted - Jun 17 2007 : 11:31:03 PM
I doctor who cares and takes you seriously is like gold. I too have struggled with these same issues, and I am thinking about you. |
| Buttercup |
Posted - Jun 17 2007 : 11:17:57 PM
Patti,
So sorry I was so quiet before, but I sure was thinking about you! Please dont ever be worried about comming here for someone to lean on! And you know my e-mail too, please never hesitate! Sure wish I was closer so I could stop by and help you more, but please dont ever feel alone! I am so sorry for all you are going through and I will be praying and waiting to hear how things turn out! Am thinking of you and sending all the hugs, prayers, happy thoughts and wishes I can find your way!!
Take Care!
Hugz!
Talitha
"If we could maintain the wonder of childhood and at the same time grasp the wisdom of age, what wonder,what wisdom,what life would be ours" |
| sherone_13 |
Posted - Jun 15 2007 : 12:32:51 PM
Patti,
I can truly say that anti-depressants have saved my life. I have been on Fluoxitine(Prozac) for about 10 years for clinical depression. It brought me from a suicidal state into a happy productive life.
Never, never feel shame for seeking help from your doctor, family or friends.
Lubs and Kisses!
www.taylorscountrystore.etsy.com
http://sheronesgarden.tripod.com/
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| nut4fabric |
Posted - Jun 15 2007 : 12:06:51 PM
Patti So glad to hear that the Doc was a caring type and that you have started on some anti Ds As for the blood in the urine, if you are doing any heavy lifting that can cause it, anyhow I am sure the Doctor will get to the bottom of it. I have never told my DH how bad I have felt either, no reason to stress him when I have family and friends to talk to.
Hugs, Kathy |
| Alee |
Posted - Jun 13 2007 : 12:54:23 PM
Patti-
How are you feeling today? I hope you are feeling much better!
Alee |
| Huckelberrywine |
Posted - Jun 08 2007 : 07:28:48 AM
From your descriptions, it sounds like you have a very caring doctor and support staff there (as well as here!) I'm sure things will get better now. I always feel better knowing what is wrong and having a plan to make it better. Even if it takes awhile, I find that helps me see my way out "to the sunshine". I hope your news continues to be good. :)
We make a difference. |
| Cindy Lee |
Posted - Jun 07 2007 : 5:46:42 PM
Shoot, you have a lot going on! Well, I'm so happy that they are working hard to figure out what's going on with you. Sounds like they are getting to the bottom of it for sure! Keep us informed Buddy. Cindy
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| Phils Ann |
Posted - Jun 07 2007 : 5:01:11 PM
Dear Patti,
You sure are on my heart. I think your dr. sounds pretty wise! I hope the medicine does help, and if it doesn't, you'll soon be able to try a new plan. You've had so much stress in the last year or so, it would be amazing not to have a meltdown. Meanwhile, we love you and pray for you... thanks for trusting us with this.
(((hugs)))
Ann
Sairy Hill Thicket
There is a Redeemer. |
| Alee |
Posted - Jun 07 2007 : 4:55:25 PM
Hi Patti!
I am so glad you found such a great and understanding doctor! I am sure it will help tons to be able to talk to him and have him treat your whole body- not just focus on one symptom or problem. *hugs!*
Alee |
| happymama58 |
Posted - Jun 07 2007 : 11:47:32 AM
Another quick update. One of the nurses from the doctor's office called a bit ago to give me the results of my bloodwork. She said all my numbers as far as the blood analysis are very good. My thyroid something (number? count?) is high, but not real high. The doctor is out of the office today, but she said he called in the morning and got my results from her and said we can go over what it means, etc., at my appointment a week from Monday. From that, I can tell it's not alarmingly high.
However, she said he was concerned because I had blood in my urine, and I haven't menustrated in almost 3 years, so it can't be that. She asked all kinds of questions about other symptoms, none of which I have. She said she was supposed to call the doctor back and if he wanted to see me before my appointment she'd call me back. I'm not concerned or anything -- I tend to be pretty laid back (in a good sort of way, I think) about things like this.
So for now, I know my results but that's pretty much it. I need to get back outside and help dh. We're moving all the extra lumber and stuff outside -- a man is coming tomorrow to dig a hole and put the dirt around the house so the furnace guy can put the a/c in on Monday. It will be nice to have a/c -- I hate that mosquitos get inside every evening 
Some people search for happiness; others create it.
Please visit me at www.marykay.com/pmiinch |
| blueroses |
Posted - Jun 07 2007 : 10:53:53 AM
Patti,
So glad to hear about your dr's visit and that it went well. We're all here for you and glad to know things are looking up a bit.
"You cannot find peace...by avoiding life."
Virginia Woolfe |
| jpbluesky |
Posted - Jun 07 2007 : 09:17:43 AM
Patti - good for you for doing all the things you can think of to make the situation better. All the times of our lives certainly add up to stress and a dose of fear, too, and we keep it all inside and it can be, honestly, depressing! It is such a common and normal reaction! So, keep up the good work of dealing with it so wisely! Praying for you!
Psalm 51: 10-13 |
| sunshine |
Posted - Jun 07 2007 : 08:30:22 AM
Just saw this this morning I hope all turns ourt well for you and that you are feeling like yourself real soon,
take care
sunshine
have a lovely day and may God bless you and keep you safe
my bloghttp://sunshinescreations.vintagethreads.com/
my web store http://vintagethreads.com/ |
| catscharm74 |
Posted - Jun 07 2007 : 07:55:23 AM
Patti- good for you for taking are of yourself. You inspire me!!
Cheers,
Heather |
| Tina Michelle |
Posted - Jun 07 2007 : 06:54:19 AM
glad that things are looking up for you.
~Seize the Day! Live, Love, Laugh~
visit me at:
http://gardengoose.blogspot.com/
and at www.stliving.net
you can also check out my etsy shops at:http://GardenGooseGifts.etsy.com |
| mkmomus |
Posted - Jun 07 2007 : 06:40:48 AM
Patti,
I am glad you feel good about your Dr visit. I too wa given an anti-depressant but then about 2 years later another dr found a thyroid condition. It turns out the pill for depression (which was diagnosed for menopause) made the thyroid condition worse. When I finally got medication straight things started looking much better. Situations were still sad at times, but I didn't overreact. My point is, if one treatment (chemical or otherwise) does not do the trick just try to hold on and try something else. I'll keep you in my prayers. Take care
Merle |
| Mumof3 |
Posted - Jun 07 2007 : 06:14:19 AM
Patti- I've been on Lexapro for the past three years. It's a loooong story, but I'm here to say that it has made a world of difference in me. :) Take care- things are looking up!
Karin
Wherever you go, there you are.
Come visit me at:
www.madrekarin.etsy.com
www.madrekarin.blogspot.com |
| Beemoosie |
Posted - Jun 07 2007 : 06:05:41 AM
Patti, I am so glad you are taking action. I have been going through similar things the last 3 years, only realizing how bad it was last spring and going to the doctor. It was such a blessing to find relief. They checked my thyroid also, but found it to be normal. I've been on a PMS med, which is technically an anti-depressant for a year. It's a med that I can start when I feel symptoms and stop when I don't need, so that tells me it's very low dose. But it has done wonders. I agree that stress triggers some wacky things in our bodies, including depression and HORMONES!
Praying for everything to go well for you.
(((HUGS)))
My soul magnifies the Lord, And my spirit rejoices in God my Savior. Luke 1:46,47
www.beequilting.blogspot.com
http://beemoosie-picture-diary.blogspot.com/ |
| happymama58 |
Posted - Jun 07 2007 : 05:51:08 AM
First of all, I want to thank you ladies for your wonderful support. Although I was nervous about being so open, I felt this was a safe place -- thank God for the farmgirls!
The doctor was very nice, spent lots of time with me, asked lots of questions, etc. He felt it was probably depression and gave me a 2-weeks' sample of Lexapro. But based on my family history & some of my physical symptoms, he thought there was a chance that a thyroid condition might be contributing to the problems. He's running some sort of blood test (T something or other) and will have the results tomorrow. In the meantime, though, he wanted to start me on Lexapro because he felt like I needed some relief or help now. I go back a week from Monday to talk about my test results, how I'm feeling, etc. The visit was difficult, but I'm so glad I went. It was nice to be totally open with someone who could help, wouldn't judge, etc.
I hadn't told my husband how bad I was feeling. I figured he's under enough stress already (prime age for heart attack) with doing most of the interior work, dealing with finances, and work issues of his own. Last night I just told him the bare basics, not as much as I told the doctor or shared here. That may sound strange, but to be honest, I don't think he needs to know and now that I have been able to get it out of my system (thanks, ladies and doctor), I don't feel so alone and in need of someone to share it with. I hope that makes sense.
As far as the medication goes, I feel really good about the course of action. At first, I was so hesitant to even think of an anti-depresent. For a year now, I've felt this growing, and I tried really hard to deal with it through exercise, prayer and Bible study, etc., but things were steadily getting worse. This doctor is an osteopath and very concerned with the whole person. He told me he wants me to be on this for 3 months, while at the same time we're going to talk about and incorporate other things that should/might help. Things like no sugar, that sort of stuff. At the end of every 3 months, we'll evaluate where I am and whether or not it's time to wean me off the medication.
One thing he said that stood out to me is that our bodies have different ways of dealing with stress. Some people develop ulcers, some have heart attacks, some develop depression. I'm sure there are more, but these were the three he mentioned. At this point, I would rather deal with depression than have a heart attack or an ulcer. So, not to sound like a Pollyanna, I realize my situation could be much worse.
Well, it's time to get up on a ladder and finish painting the living room. Ladies, words don't express how much it meant to me to read your posts and know I have your support. Thank you sooooo much for taking the time to read all of this and for being there for me.
Some people search for happiness; others create it.
Please visit me at www.marykay.com/pmiinch |
| Mumof3 |
Posted - Jun 07 2007 : 05:24:52 AM
Patty- A big farmgirl (((hug))) to you. I hope that you were able to open up to your doctor the way you have with us. My goodness, you have had so many upheavals in the past few months, it is no wonder that you are feeling blue. You have made the big step trying to get this sorted out and that's a good, positive move in the right direction!! Good for you. We're always here for ya!
Karin
Wherever you go, there you are.
Come visit me at:
www.madrekarin.etsy.com
www.madrekarin.blogspot.com |
| Nancy Gartenman |
Posted - Jun 07 2007 : 04:59:36 AM
Patti,
Sorry to hear you are having a down time. Is there something positive you could focus on? How is your new house coming along? Are you able to be outside and plant anything yet? I know this past year has been hard on you, so so many changes, I was concerned about you way back when you seem to be dealing with to many big issues at the same time. Hope your new doctor is able to help you, and try and focus on something that you can control so that you get some positive feed back for yourself.
NANCY JO
www.Nancy-Jo.blogspot.com |
| mima |
Posted - Jun 06 2007 : 5:31:27 PM
I can sooo sympathize with you! Depression is rough and it definately has a stigma - you don't want anyone to know. Last spring I had really spirled out of control and was having suicidal ideation.That landed me in a pysch hospital- one of the most terrifying expirences of my life!!! Think One Flew Over the Cuckooos Nest. I did get anti- depressents and a therapist and it me helped understand things. I'm much better but it's a struggle. I have alot of mental illness in my biological famly and I sooo don't want to go down that road. Good luck to you and many hugs! There is help out there. |
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