| T O P I C R E V I E W |
| 36paws20hooves |
Posted - Jul 11 2010 : 12:57:26 PM
I have had my own rescue farm and run it for about 9 years now. I bought it shortly after I divorced when I was only 22. I have dated a few people here and there 1 or 2 were OOOKKK. They have all had kids or some other kind of baggage. Don't get me wrong I love kids and I DO want some, but I always thought it would be nice for it to be both of our 1sts. Being 31 now.... it was looking kinda grim.
I know there is not such a thing as "perfect" in-laws but I at least need them to be "sane". I have recently met a GREAT guy with a NORMAL family. He is just like me (no kids or extra baggage). His parents have been married FOREVER. I think his mom loves me more than my mom. His family comes to hug ME first when we get together. :) We both know that there is something different here than there ever has been before even when we were with our spouses.
We have not been apart for 1 day since we met. He has helped me out on the farm without me even asking. He is so eager to learn. He even admitted he was a little intimidated at first but he tries to do it all if he needs help he just asks. We had to go to his cousins wedding on Friday and now that is all he is talking about. Weddings and babies, weddings and babies.
I told my older best friend 2 days after meeting him that I WAS going to marry this one and she just laughed. This week my younger best friend called and asked if I was OK she hadn’t heard from me in a couple of days. I told her I had been with the new guy I told her about…. She started hollering “I knew it I knew it!! He’s the one!” then she went on to tell me about her best friend she had when she met her husband and how she knew he was the one.
He keeps asking how soon is too soon. I have NOOO idea. I know not tomorrow. His dads dad met his grandmother when he was home on leave for 3 days married her took her back with him and they were together ever since.
I am happy but kind of scared at the same time. Any advice or thoughts would be greatly appreciated.
I'm so busy I don't know if I just found a rope or lost my horse! |
| 25 L A T E S T R E P L I E S (Newest First) |
| pnickols |
Posted - Aug 03 2010 : 2:18:01 PM
met my hubby in December, married the next September, was a blind date we just clicked, spent all the time together or on the phone, our 25th anniversary is this September and I still would rather be with him than anyone else... love him so much
our greatest glory is not in never falling but in getting up every time we do (confucious) |
| sunshine7 |
Posted - Aug 03 2010 : 12:09:51 PM
HI !!
I have the FAIRYTALE marriage!!!
I met my husband and in less than two weeks we were eloping at a Bed and Breakfast, snowshoing in the Tetons for our Honeymoon and then we began a great adventure together, our marriage.
It's been a ride, we built our own house, had a baby, medical issues, and with just 5 years under under our belt. As life presents itself you will grow and know him and yourself more.
Is he the man that you want to grow with? Will you accept his annoying qualities as well as his great qualities?!!
I have blossomed more from having my husband in my life than any other adventure I have been through. He is my calm, my teacher and soul man!!!
Listen to your heart and soul, trust yourself, she knows.
|
| prairie_princess |
Posted - Aug 01 2010 : 4:43:44 PM
how fun to read all of your stories! boy, i've learned a lot in the short 5 years I've been married... it's hard to kick my "romantic-at-heart" views. But I know I married a man who is a great husband. I don't think we ever had that love at first sight thing going on, sometimes I wonder if we got married too soon or too young, but, all in all, I think luck had a big part to play in me finding him. We were together 2 1/2 years, engaged for 3 months before getting married, a good amount of time, I think, to really feel a person out, see if you know you can make everything work. I'd love to believe in the romantic side of things (and some of you ladies sure do have some romantic stories!), but now I believe marriage is more of a entity that works best when it's maintained... that is, opening up communication, having those important things in common, etc. But, I think in reality, everyone is different... some have made marriages work after only knowing each other for days (how lucky!)... some marriages don't make it work even after being together for years. So, I think follow your heart... counseling and knowing certain things about each other is good advice. But, hey, some people make it work just fine without it, too. Good luck!
"Only two things that money can't buy, that's true love and homegrown tomatoes."
- Guy Clark
"The man who has planted a garden feels he has done something for the good of the world."
- Charles Dudley Warner |
| momdrinkstea |
Posted - Jul 26 2010 : 02:27:15 AM
Met my hubby at summer camp! We were both counselors. Pre-marriage counseling, we were
asked "What do you have in common? What hobbies do you share?", etc. Well, we couldn't
find any! LOL But on how to raise kids, politics, how to spend money, lifestyle we want to live,
how to deal with aging parents, keeping pets, goals, etc. we always agree. If you have the same outlooks, dreams, and desires, it should work!
We'll be married 18 years in August.
Good luck!
6 Khaki Campbell Ducks, 10 Barred Plymouth Rocks, 10 New Hampshire Reds, 8 Mille Fleur Bearded D'Uccles, 3 Aracaunas, 3 Australorps, 1 GIANT mutt Roo, 2 border collies, asst. cats, 1 Great Hubby and 3 cute kids! |
| phonelady |
Posted - Jul 25 2010 : 09:21:59 AM
If you think this might be The One. Talk about things. Marriage Counseling. What are both your views on money? Do they match [many marriages go south over money problems].
What are your views on family [is he massively co-dependent? Are you? Will you to be a team that takes on the world together or will he be putting Mommie first?
What about both of you having plans for the future? Do they match? Or even come close?
Communication and compromise. Do you treat each other with respect [you both have ideas and dreams and they're both valid].
Good luck!
Carla
It's not just life-
It's an adventure!
http://familyhistoryfindings.blogspot.com/ |
| Jennifer Q. |
Posted - Jul 23 2010 : 8:39:04 PM
My husband and I have been together 6 years and got married 1.5 years ago... Before we got married, his parents felt like mine! I lucked out with his parents though! Good luck! |
| Merry |
Posted - Jul 21 2010 : 10:12:58 AM
I had known my first husband since I was 12 yrs old, it ended in a painful divorce. My 2nd husband proposed and have me a ring 6 weeks after meeting me, it did take us 2 years to get married, he was a Marine and had orders to another embassy, but we did get married and have been newlyweds for 18 years now.
Be realistic and honest with yourself. No wishful thinking and be willing to face the truth, and all that doesn't have to be bad!
Merry
Farmgirl #536
http://afarminmyheart.blogspot.com/
Your life is an occasion, rise to it. Mr. Magorium |
| msdoolittle |
Posted - Jul 21 2010 : 08:48:33 AM
I have been married 3 times. My first husband and I were best friends, even had the same birthday. I was too young and immature to handle the reality of marriage, and we had an amicable divorce. Met #2 at a bar (mistake #1), he lived with his parents (mistake #2), and never seemed to have time for his own son (why didn't I run?). Married after about a year, had a baby, and I divorced him less than 2 years later due to many things, but mainly, I couldn't stand the screaming and the fact that he would rather spend time with friends/mommy than with our own family.
I had met #3 several years prior, we began talking and found out we were both totally miserable. We talked for hours and hours every day. We separated from our spouses on the same day (my birthday, totally unplanned), and were both divorced within about 2 months of each other, and began dating. He asked me to marry him about 3 months after my divorce, and I have not regretted it for one second. We are the very best of friends and he treats me like an absolute Queen. We will be married 5 years next month, and it has been a dream.
Of course, you never REALLY know a person until you marry them, but as long as he isn't showing signs of being an abuser (I was in a relationship like that, and I could slap myself for it), and you both share the same 'life vision'...well, I'd go for it! My other suggestion would be to talk talk talk about your goals, his goals, etc. This is how I KNEW that #3 was IT for me...we told each other things that we absolutely would NOT want or deal with. :0)
FarmGirl #1390
www.mylittlecountry.wordpress.com |
| reddhedd |
Posted - Jul 16 2010 : 5:36:11 PM
First husband...met and got engaged the same night. I was 15, he was 17. I broke it off when I came to my senses....but married him 10 months later. After 3 months of beatings, I left.
Second husband, years later. First date was July 8th. We moved in together 7 weeks later, and married 14 months after that. We've been married for 20 years, and happiness is a way of life. I'm SOOOO lucky; my husband is amazing, and I still get a little butterfly in my stomach when I see him after an absence.
"It's difficult to think anything but pleasant thoughts while eating a homegrown tomato." --Lewis Grizzard |
| sherrye |
Posted - Jul 14 2010 : 5:42:58 PM
well love story here too. papa and i met at a christian meeting and were married 3 months later. i was a hippie girl he was a dairy boy. green and scared and in love and excited. it has never been dull. we are together now for 36 years and still going strong. i know my God Jah gave him to me. so you go girl as the others have said follow your heart. happy days sherrye
the learn as we go silk purse farm
farm girl #1014
|
| MrsRooster |
Posted - Jul 14 2010 : 07:14:39 AM
Love all the stories.
My hubby and I met in fall of 1995. His Mom was dying at the time. We talked on the phone a few time. We went out in Jan of 1996. We have been together ever since. He actually asked me to marry him a few weeks after we went out. We lived together for a few months. We got engaged in Aug of 1996 and we married Aug of 1997.
We are best friends. We have had good and bad times. But we always have each other.
The only thing I can say is do what you think is right. Don't worry about what people will say. My parents can't stand my hubby. We will be married 13 years in Aug.
I will pray for you. Lots of love.
www.mrsrooster.blogspot.com
Farmgirl #1259
|
| farmmilkmama |
Posted - Jul 13 2010 : 8:45:05 PM
It is fun to read the stories!
I was engaged to a guy for a long time but he was a jerk (and I finally got around to admitting it) so I called off the wedding about three months before it was supposed to happen. I met my sweet husband about a month after that. We met in June of 99, engaged in Feb of 00 and married in October of 00. Will celebrate 10 years this fall. :)
--* FarmMilkMama *--
Farmgirl Sister #1086
Be yourself.
Everyone else is already taken.
-Oscar Wilde
www.wakeupstartlearning.blogspot.com
www.farmfoodmama.blogspot.com |
| maggie14 |
Posted - Jul 13 2010 : 8:01:46 PM
This has been so much fun reading all your stories! What can I say, I'm a romantic at heart.
Hugs,
Channah
Farmgirl sister #1219
Just a small town country girl trying to live her dreams. :) |
| lovingewe |
Posted - Jul 13 2010 : 7:50:42 PM
I met my husband at high school. He asked me to marry him after graduation, I thought he was nuts! He asked four times in 6 years but I wanted to make sure he knew where he was truly headed in the big things in life. We were married his graduating year of University. I had finished University a year earlier. WE bought a farm and raised a family and have been married 27 wonderful years.
Marlyn
http://sweetlocuslane.blogspot.com |
| Bonnie Ellis |
Posted - Jul 13 2010 : 02:56:45 AM
My husband is 4 years older than I and he was my councelor at our church camp. I was 19 when I was married. We celebrated 48 married years this year. Love will find a way. Sounds like your guy is Mr. right. Grab him quick. There aren't many like him out there. God bless. Bonnie
grandmother and orphan farmgirl |
| Celticheart |
Posted - Jul 12 2010 : 5:51:00 PM
I was much too practical to ever believe in 'love-at-first-sight' until the night I met my husband. I was out with my sister and he was with a friend. He thought I was 28 and I thought he was about 28 and boy, were we both wrong! But, by then it was too late. I was 34 and he was 22! I spent way too much time adding and subtracting those numbers and our ages never did get any closer together. He finally told me it didn't matter. We dated for 2 years and we've been married for 22 years and we have one gorgeous son who just turned 21. It hasn't all been easy but most of it has been an incredible adventure. And 'they' said it would never work. Ha!
My oldest daughter, who will be 35 next week, married the first guy she ever dated in high school...fifteen years later. They had each gone to college, moved far away, had really good jobs and had a history of some very bad relationships, but neither one had any kids or had ever been married. They were reintroduced by mutual friends and were married a year later.
"Let us never forget that the cultivation of the earth is the most important labor of man. When tillage begins, other art follows. The farmers, therefore, are the founders of civilization."
Daniel Webster
|
| HealingTouch |
Posted - Jul 12 2010 : 11:52:05 AM
I thought I had a winner and fell in love with someone who was divorced and had 2 boys. We lived together while I was in nursing school. I graduated from nursing school 1 week and got married the next week. While I was in school he got custody of the kids and I was raising them. Poor me! I was the one solely responsible for them. Their mommy and daddy did their own thing and I was it. I should have left but in that day and age it wasn't the thing to do. I got married and I shouldn't have. My husband was abusive then and he still is. I feel like such a fool for wasting my life. The good thing is my 2 children. He tells me on a frequent basis that I never did a thing for him in his life. If he doesn't get his way he throws a temper tantrum and all the verbal and mental abuse starts again. It's been 43 years of hell to someone who promised me the world until he got me. I applaud all of you who were able to get divorced and move on. I wasn't strong enough to do it because I knew he would never let me alone. However, he is in for a big shock. I already applied for my nursing license in another state and I'm going to be gone for 3 months to decide on the rest of my life. My sister lives in that state. There just might be someone that could love me. I'm not looking but if it happens I'll move on. If you know than do what's in your heart.
Blessings,
Darlene |
| KanMogirl |
Posted - Jul 12 2010 : 10:33:40 AM
I had just moved to Kansas and was tired of the bar scene so I joined a club that had a dating service. It had some safety policies and I was careful about where I met them. ; My husband was the second guy I met but not the last. I guess I was drawn to him, though. We met in June and he asked me to marry him in October after seeing Fiddler on the Roof. We married the next April and we've been married for 27 years and have 3 daughters. There is no standard time; there is a lot more to it but it is hard to explain. From your description, he sounds like a keeper but only you can decide that.
I would rather wear out than rust out.----Richard Cumberland |
| mndreamer |
Posted - Jul 12 2010 : 08:54:46 AM
Hi Danielle, I agree with Diane...just follow your heart. You will know when it's right. The best of luck to both of you!
~Vicky~
Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God. ~~Ronald Reagan
|
| natesgirl |
Posted - Jul 12 2010 : 08:52:25 AM
I met my Hubby in 8th grade. We were best friends, but I didn't see him as a husband type till I was married to the worlds biggest loser. I was divorced, engaged, and married in about 3 months time. My Hubby was there by my side through the horrible marriage, payed for my divorce, and let me have my silly side by agreeing to marry on halloween! We've been married almost 13 years now. My parents met at work and knew each other for 9 weeks on their wedding day. They've been married for 35 years now. Long or short doesn't matter, if it's right it's right. Follow your heart. If you believe, pray about it. God will lead you.
Farmgirl Sister #1438
God - Gardening - Family - Is anything else important? |
| sherone_13 |
Posted - Jul 12 2010 : 08:27:50 AM
Met my hubbie when I was fifteen at a disco dance. (dating myself) He had the coolest Chevy truck in town. I tell him all time that the truck is what snagged me. He was 20, so my parents would not let us date until I was 16. We dated for 2 1/2 years until I graduated high school. We got married 2 days after graduation and have been married for 29 years.
Remember that no one guy is going to perfect for you. If you love him enough that you can put up with him when he is being his worst jerk (because he will be a jerk) then there may be a chance. There won't be a chance if you don't try, though, right?
Hope everything works out well for you.
Thanks!
Sherone
Farmgirl Sister #1682
My Blog - www.annapearlsattic.blogspot.com
Etsy Store - www.annapearlsattic.etsy.com
Women are angels. When someone breaks our wings, we just jump on our broomsticks and fly! We are flexible that way! |
| FebruaryViolet |
Posted - Jul 12 2010 : 08:09:52 AM
What does your heart say? I know that sounds like a silly, romantic thing to say, but having had the experience of a "planned engagement, do all the right things and get married" marriage, that failed and then a "fly by the seat of your pants and do whatever feels right" marriage, I'd choose the latter.
My first husband: we met, dated for 2 years, got engaged when I said I wasn't going to "live" with someone, then divorced after 4 years of marriage. Crazy inlaws and his inability to stay sober also helped with the marriage's demise...
My now husband: we met July 10th, he moved in August 25th and we married a year later, on August 4th. We had our first child a year ago, February, after 9 years of marriage--as much as I even thought, "what? Are you nuts?" I wouldn't change a thing--when you know, you know :)
Musings from our family in the Bluegrass http://sweetvioletmae.blogspot.com/ |
| nut4fabric |
Posted - Jul 12 2010 : 07:58:30 AM
Met my husband on a Sunday afternoon at a friends house, he asked me to marry him the following Saturday, and we were married 6 months later. It has been 31 years now. When you know it's the right person you just know.
Kathy |
| levisgrammy |
Posted - Jul 12 2010 : 06:12:57 AM
Met my husband in November, started planning a May wedding in January. We have been married 28 yrs. and have
3 of the best blessings (aka kids) in the world.
And it only took us about twenty minutes to get married. It was all the planning that took so long. 
farmgirl sister#43
"All you need is faith, trust and......a little bit of pixie dust" ~Peter Pan |
| Fiddlehead Farm |
Posted - Jul 12 2010 : 05:24:22 AM
There is no perfect time, just follow your heart! I met my DH in June and was married one year later in June! We just had our 10th anniversary last month. My first Husband and I were together for 3 years before being married. We were young and he turned into an alcoholic. After 8 years and two children, I left and was single for over 11 years before meeting my current DH.
Age only matters if you are wine or cheese.
http://studiodiphotosite.shutterfly.com/
farmgirl sister #922 |
|
|
