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doll58maker
True Blue Farmgirl

2258 Posts

G
TX
USA
2258 Posts

Posted - Oct 28 2015 :  5:33:47 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Holly how did you slip in there between my two texts.

Kids will do anything to get their parents back together again. Holly I like the way you cut to the chase.

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rough start farmgirl
True Blue Farmgirl

3331 Posts

marianne
The Beautiful Pacific NW Washington State
USA
3331 Posts

Posted - Oct 28 2015 :  8:14:32 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Well done, g.

Holly, rats make me unable to function. Good luck.

Bunny, is The Ball this weekend already? your son needs to realize that as much as he doesn't think his father needs to be anyone he isn't, you deserve the same respect. You don't need to live a life of pretense.

Mar
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Marilyn Hartman Sullivan
True Blue Farmgirl

1134 Posts

Marilyn
Oxford PA
USA
1134 Posts

Posted - Oct 29 2015 :  05:59:23 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Amen, Mar -- What's good for the goose, or the gander, or the duck -- heck, I don't know anymore. But Bunny gets to do whatever she wants AND we are all anxious to hear about Cinderella's evening and see pix of that gown!!!

Farmgirl #6318
"Where there's a will -- there's probably a family fight."
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Bearclover
True Blue Farmgirl

2376 Posts

Bunny
The Dalles OR
USA
2376 Posts

Posted - Oct 29 2015 :  08:26:36 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
The ball isn't until November 20.
I tried to talk to my youngest about the moving in issue. He said the same thing. They both think it is the best thing for me. They just don't realize how much anger is still there. I guess I have just been way to nice and understanding all these years. They just don't get it. By the way, he has girl parts upstairs and boy parts down stairs. He takes mega hormones to keep everything in check.
I know they mean well.


Bunny

Farmgirl number 3738
My blogs:
www.curiousorangecat.com
Handmade stuff http://www.curiousorangecat.etsy.com


Not all who wander are lost.../
Plan to improvise
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doll58maker
True Blue Farmgirl

2258 Posts

G
TX
USA
2258 Posts

Posted - Oct 29 2015 :  08:57:18 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Bunny, I agree with the others--i would not go back there. Everybody has to do what is right for them, but I never hang on to old relationships. No good comes from it. There really is nothing more pathetic than an Ex still hanging around and I don't want to be one. There is a reason why the relationship ended. So we can move on, so that's what we need to do. Eventually our children get their own life experience and then they will understand.

Edited by - doll58maker on Oct 29 2015 08:58:05 AM
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Marilyn Hartman Sullivan
True Blue Farmgirl

1134 Posts

Marilyn
Oxford PA
USA
1134 Posts

Posted - Oct 29 2015 :  09:10:23 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
When I left my ex, my granddaughter would not speak to me for the longest time. I understood that she was feeling protective of her grandpa, and that was fine, but it was pretty hurtful and I missed her. Well, in the past five years she has had some ups and downs in her relationship with her boyfriend and father of their twins and now she makes it a point to stay in touch and tell me she loves me. Life has a way of teaching us to be more tolerant, I think.

My former son-in-law became a woman. Pretty much destroyed the whole family the way he went about it.

Farmgirl #6318
"Where there's a will -- there's probably a family fight."
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Bearclover
True Blue Farmgirl

2376 Posts

Bunny
The Dalles OR
USA
2376 Posts

Posted - Oct 29 2015 :  5:57:46 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
I guess it will all come down to what is the best for living conditions. Section 8 housing isn't the best. Lists of scary people and loud kids. The deal with my x isn't for a few years anyway. Maybe by that time I'll be ready for a change. One of my vigfest issues is he wants to move to a fairly co service area in Oregon. Not going to be too welcoming to someone like him. I don't want to deal with the secrecy that he will insist on regarding his gender issues. Plus we will be far from our sons. If he would move back to the mountains where we use to live, I might be more inclined to deal with it. I would at least be closer to old friends that know all the history.

Not looking forward to ghetto living though with section 8. Just a note; all the nice new low income housing being built here is for low income farm workers. Nothing like being average white female and being discriminated agents for housing.

Bunny

Farmgirl number 3738
My blogs:
www.curiousorangecat.com
Handmade stuff http://www.curiousorangecat.etsy.com


Not all who wander are lost.../
Plan to improvise
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Bearclover
True Blue Farmgirl

2376 Posts

Bunny
The Dalles OR
USA
2376 Posts

Posted - Oct 29 2015 :  5:58:49 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Oh, and the free clinic in town is also only for farm workers. No free clinic for white people in town.

Bunny

Farmgirl number 3738
My blogs:
www.curiousorangecat.com
Handmade stuff http://www.curiousorangecat.etsy.com


Not all who wander are lost.../
Plan to improvise
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Bearclover
True Blue Farmgirl

2376 Posts

Bunny
The Dalles OR
USA
2376 Posts

Posted - Oct 29 2015 :  6:00:35 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Good grief, auto correct totally messed up my post. I meant, he wants to live in a very conservative town in Oregon. And lots of scary people not lists. What the he//.

Bunny

Farmgirl number 3738
My blogs:
www.curiousorangecat.com
Handmade stuff http://www.curiousorangecat.etsy.com


Not all who wander are lost.../
Plan to improvise
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doll58maker
True Blue Farmgirl

2258 Posts

G
TX
USA
2258 Posts

Posted - Oct 29 2015 :  6:18:55 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote


We

Today was a glorious fall day. I opened up the house and spent the day cleaning. I think the rain is supposed to return soon. And daylight savings time falls back on Sunday, I believe, so we will have about three months of short days. It's spring forward, fall back, isn't it
Well, ladies, that's all I've got for tonight.

Edited by - doll58maker on Jul 17 2019 3:43:29 PM
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doll58maker
True Blue Farmgirl

2258 Posts

G
TX
USA
2258 Posts

Posted - Oct 29 2015 :  6:29:50 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Hey, Bunny, I thought I was posting right under Marilyn's post.

I hear you on the discrimination thing. Thats why so many women stay in bad relationships. It's a pity. I've seen it all my life. Things do have a way of working out, though. I'm glad you have a job you like and a boss who seems to be really good to you. You do have that.
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Tall Holly
True Blue Farmgirl

2231 Posts

Holly
Worcester Vermont
USA
2231 Posts

Posted - Oct 29 2015 :  6:39:40 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Good evening everyone,

I was told by a M to F transgendered person that when she started to take female hormones her man parts shrunk up and she was so happy. So, she might have female parts on the top and man parts on the bottom but the man parts are not very big.

Anyway, It is interesting to me that now that being transgendered is talked about more I hear of more people who have transitioned or are in the process. Bunny's X, Marlyn's X SIL and three young people here in my neighbor hood.

In the eighties when I helped to organize a conference for Lesbian, Gay, bisexual people we had several workshops on being transsexual and transgendered. It was new back then. Only Rene Richards and RuPaul had been heard about. We had two people from Boston come up. One lived as a woman and was single but was anatomically a man. The other was married to a woman, worked as a man and spent his social time dresses and passing as a woman. She/ He said his wife went shopping with him. it was interesting visiting with them. They both belonged to a group called Tiffanys. That was along time ago.
Now the young man in our town had a go fund me campaign to have top surgery. He said afterwards he did not know how painful it would be before he did it. His family of origin has made some tremendous strides in acceptance since he announced he would transition.

What is pickle ball?

I watched this infomertial on AOL about Probiotics and having a healthy gut and how an unhealthy gut affects a person's well being. It is on Probiotic America and the narrator is Dr Cary Nelson. I am usually leary about information given as an informercial but found his presentation interesting.

Today was like a lovely day in late August. Temperatures rose into the sixties by late morning and then cooled off quickly. I worked in the garden and planted the garlic for next year's crop. Slowly I am getting everything done.

sweet dreams,

Holly
farmgirl #2499
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doll58maker
True Blue Farmgirl

2258 Posts

G
TX
USA
2258 Posts

Posted - Oct 29 2015 :  6:52:38 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote

PICKLEBALL

Pickleball is a highly contagious, progressive and incurable disease. The USA Pickleball Association estimates there are approximately 200,000 infected people worldwide. Unlike other epidemics of this scale, pickleball occurs primarily in developed countries. While rarely fatal, the disease has enormous impact on the lives of infected individuals and on society as a whole.

Google pickleball for more than you ever wanted to know.

Edited by - doll58maker on Oct 30 2015 7:54:30 PM
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Bearclover
True Blue Farmgirl

2376 Posts

Bunny
The Dalles OR
USA
2376 Posts

Posted - Oct 29 2015 :  7:07:13 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
G, very cute on the pickleball. I bet it is good exercise too. Good for B getting out there and playing in public. I bet they will love it. Especially the ballads.

My x hid his feelings regarding feeling transgendered for quite a while. We were married five years before I saw the signs something wasn't quite right. I think my biggest complaint was that after he "came out", everything was about him. His feelings, his sacrifices, etc. no one seemed to care about the rest of our family and what we were going through. Many wives don't handle it very well. I didn't want to be one of those. I wanted my kids to deal with it with understanding and open mindedness. I wanted them to have a healthy relationship with their dad regardless of how he looked. So consequently they don't understand my issues. I have stuffed them under the rug all this time to accommodate them. Don't get me wrong. He/she is a good person. Terrible with finances but has a big heart.



Bunny

Farmgirl number 3738
My blogs:
www.curiousorangecat.com
Handmade stuff http://www.curiousorangecat.etsy.com


Not all who wander are lost.../
Plan to improvise
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doll58maker
True Blue Farmgirl

2258 Posts

G
TX
USA
2258 Posts

Posted - Oct 29 2015 :  7:07:29 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
.

Edited by - doll58maker on Oct 29 2015 7:41:24 PM
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Bearclover
True Blue Farmgirl

2376 Posts

Bunny
The Dalles OR
USA
2376 Posts

Posted - Oct 29 2015 :  7:09:13 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Holly, statistics at one time stated that 1% of the population is transgendered. My X works at Lawrence Livermore Labs. There are 7000 people working on site and 7 of them are transgendered.

Bunny

Farmgirl number 3738
My blogs:
www.curiousorangecat.com
Handmade stuff http://www.curiousorangecat.etsy.com


Not all who wander are lost.../
Plan to improvise
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doll58maker
True Blue Farmgirl

2258 Posts

G
TX
USA
2258 Posts

Posted - Oct 29 2015 :  7:39:33 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Bunny I would not have handled it well. You are a stronger person than I am. Your kids are old enough to see what you did for them. That was a huge sacrifice, I don't care how good a person she is, you married a he. That was the deal. You have a right to your feelings and you have a right to do what you need to do to work through them. All that bottled up inside you certainly would take a terrible toll on you both physically and mentally.
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prariehawk
True Blue Farmgirl

2914 Posts

Cindy

2914 Posts

Posted - Oct 29 2015 :  9:23:36 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
When I was younger I had a transgendered friend. when I first met him, he was dressing as a female part of the time. Soon after that first meeting, he changed his name to Michelle and dressed like a woman all the time. She said she had to live for one year as a woman before her psychiatrist would let her have any surgery. I was OK with it at first but as I got to know her better, I sensed something was off. She had the surgery and I lost touch with her. She did tell me, after the first surgery, that she had thought of asking me out the first time she saw me. She said she never told her doctor because she was afraid he wouldn't let her go through with the surgery if he knew. So she married a man and they were married for two years. then she decided she was really a lesbian. And she wanted a divorce. the poor man was devastated. And yes, it was all about her. I guess that's what I sensed about her and why I stopped being her friend.
That being said, there is a gay bar in this town with a really good drag show. It's entertaining and the performers are very professional. A fair number of straight women go to this bar cause it's the only place they can go and not be hit on by men. The son of a nationally prominent woman was outed when someone took pictures of him leaving the bar. His mother--a so-called Christian--disowned him. Even though her favorite televangelist has said that homosexuality is "caused" by an overbearing mother. I guess she skipped that sermon. People like that make me sick. I tend to be attracted to gay men. Guess that's why I never have any dates.
Cindy

"Come by the hills to the land where fancy is free; And stand where the peaks meet the sky and the rocks reach the sea.Where the rivers run clear and the bracken is gold in the sun. and cares of tomorrow must wait till this day is done"--Loreena McKennit
"In many ways, you don't just live in the country, it lives inside you"--Ellen Eilers

Visit my blog at http://www.farmerinthebelle.blogspot.com/
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Marilyn Hartman Sullivan
True Blue Farmgirl

1134 Posts

Marilyn
Oxford PA
USA
1134 Posts

Posted - Oct 30 2015 :  06:15:09 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
The selfishness was the problem for us. And the lying. He stole money from our LLC to pay for his surgeries -- nearly bankrupted us. Lied to his wife for months while he was taking the hormone treatments. Lied to us. Insisted that we all just embrace this big change and that nothing should change. Cry me a river, but do NOT make my grandchildren cry and do NOT steal money from me.

Farmgirl #6318
"Where there's a will -- there's probably a family fight."
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doll58maker
True Blue Farmgirl

2258 Posts

G
TX
USA
2258 Posts

Posted - Oct 30 2015 :  07:44:04 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Our beautiful weather came to an abrupt end in the middle of the night. This morning at 8:00 it still looked like night, the storms are devastating once again. Flooding and tornado warnings all day. Almost 10 inches of rain already where my dd lives. Major flooding along the rivers. This happened last spring, then severe drought all summer long, now floods again. Insane.
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Marilyn Hartman Sullivan
True Blue Farmgirl

1134 Posts

Marilyn
Oxford PA
USA
1134 Posts

Posted - Oct 30 2015 :  07:59:47 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
I have pet names for my daughter, my sweetie, my grandchildren -- once in a while I call my dear sweet Daddy "Old-Timer" or "Oh Venerable One," because it tickles him. I have a group of close friends who call me "M," which is fine with me. Most of the members of our Rotary Club are sort of in the habit of calling each other, "My Friend." But when Dude sent a complete stranger back to my office this morning so that I could take a credit application from her, she greeted me with "Good morning, Love," and I said "My name is Marilyn, and we will just use that in future."

I was sort of surprised to hear it come out of my mouth, actually. I have been taught all my life to keep my opinions to myself and to NOT express myself out loud (Maybe that's what's wrong -- everything is backing up on the inside? ha ha ha), but I have always absolutely HATED having strangers call me by silly pet names. If you are over 80, you get a pass. But this woman was coming in to apply for a loan and called me "Love."

This week has been challenging, and I guess I am running out of emotional spoons. It gets so tiresome to have people lie to you all day long and to call and beg and whine for things, and then to turn right around the next day and beg and whine for more. Sometimes I feel like shaking them!!! I need to adjust my attitude, because at the rate I'm going, I am going to bite someone on the neck and give them the gleek pretty soon. Then the men in the white coats will be 'round to pick me up in their shiny truck again.

Farmgirl #6318
"Where there's a will -- there's probably a family fight."
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doll58maker
True Blue Farmgirl

2258 Posts

G
TX
USA
2258 Posts

Posted - Oct 30 2015 :  08:41:15 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
I've always hated to be called pet names by strangers. Especially if they were younger than me. I used to call them out on it but now I just ignore them but in your case dealing with low lifesI would definitely do what you did. It is disrespectful even if they are too ignorant to realize it.
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churunga
True Blue Farmgirl

3067 Posts

Marie
Minneapolis MN
USA
3067 Posts

Posted - Oct 30 2015 :  09:32:08 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
I believe that on the subject of gender, honesty should always be the best policy. Those who are experiencing the discomfort have an obligation to be honest about their feelings. The friends and family have an obligation to listen and process their own feelings in their own way. I believe that it is best if everyone has all the information they need on this and can all work it out together. The end change is dramatic and difficult to ignore. I had a transgender friend. He couldn't afford to take the meds or get the operation. He would dress as a woman frequently and looked really good. I met a gentleman at a powwow who was a cross dresser and member of the Lakota tribe. I asked about the tribe's take on this. He said that it was believed that a person such as him was considered to have two souls and was allowed to order their own lives. His wife assured me that he, in all the important ways for her, behaved in a masculine manner and that whatever he had to do to feel comfortable was part of why she loved him.

I just donated to the production of a documentary film about the life of Edgar Allan Poe through Kickstarter. I am pretty excited about this.

I never call anyone by pet names in public. I have forbidden anyone except for immediately family to call me by my pet name.

I have so much to do to get ready for the gig tomorrow. We can load in at noon and set up and do sound checks at 2:00. I want to take a nap and come back at 6:00 to get the hall finished up. I will then sit at the cash box and hope enough people come in so we can pay for the hall. I would have loved to read tarot for tips, which would go into the profit, but I have other duties. <sigh> I'll try to take pictures tomorrow night.

Marie, Sister #5142
Farmgirl of the Month May 2014

Try everything once and the fun things twice.
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Marilyn Hartman Sullivan
True Blue Farmgirl

1134 Posts

Marilyn
Oxford PA
USA
1134 Posts

Posted - Oct 30 2015 :  11:04:17 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Marie -- Sounds like so much work, but it's good to hear that you are feeling up to it! I agree with the honesty. We are never going to please everyone, but just be honest and you lose the people you lose.

Ladies --- Seriously --- just had a call from a customer (ha! Must be flashing back - I almost called her a patient) who wanted an extension on her payment BECAUSE IT IS HALLOWE'EN!!! No kidding. She has had several extensions and I had told her I couldn't give her another one because her account is two payments in arrears right now. "Well how can I be behind if I haven't missed any payments?" I explained that each extension of 3 days or a week or whatever will add up until eventually you have missed a whole payment cycle and that is exactly what has happened. "I don't want to be stuck here without costumes for my kids -- it's Hallowe'en!!" I told her politely that Hallowe'en was not really a priority for me and that bringing her account current was. This happens every year at Christmastime with lots of people, too. They go spend a bunch of money on gifts and stuff and then want us to take an old cold tater and wait. This particular customer said that she had a check "on hold" until 1:00 tomorrow morning -- I told her that Dude would be here tomorrow and she could make the payment then. She insisted that she wanted to wait until Monday. I said "no." I am the meanest woman in the world.

On a more positive note -- it seems to be some kind of Amish holiday or something -- so many buggies in town today! Or maybe they are getting business done because tomorrow is a holiday for them (Not Halloween, of course, but something else)-- I will have to do some research. There are always lots of buggies in town on Fridays, but it just seems like lots more for some reason. Harvest is about over for most of them, except the big corn producers. Some of them still have some field corn out. The tobacco has been long in the shed and pumpkins are pretty much done, too. Most of the local Amish grow carving pumpkins, so they came in earlier. The folks with orchard crops are still bringing fruit to the market, but these are town buggies. Hmmmm. A mystery.

G -- I hope everyone is okay with all the rain. It would be nice to have it even out a little bit, wouldn't it? I realize Texas is a huge state, but whenever I hear about it on the weather, I immediately think of you and my niece -- she lives in a place called Ackerly, and I don't even know where that is. Anyway, I hope it doesn't interfere with pickleball!!! ha ha ha

Farmgirl #6318
"Where there's a will -- there's probably a family fight."
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doll58maker
True Blue Farmgirl

2258 Posts

G
TX
USA
2258 Posts

Posted - Oct 30 2015 :  12:32:15 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
no pickleball today, Marilyn. We are fine -- lots of rain but no flooding here, but terrible flooding nearby. My back yard was standing water for a while thanks to the neighbor behind me not thinking about drainage when he built his flower beds. We are on a gentle slope here. The front of the house is street level but there are four steps down to the ground in the back. The land continues sloping down for quite a way before reaching the creek.

I do not know where Ackerly is either. It must be fairly small.

Marie, are you feeling lots better? Don't forget and start lifting things.

You mean people can skip paying their bills on Halloween? Wow, how could I have missed that all these years! Im surprised these people don't expect the government to furnish them a car for "free".

I have a bug today but doesn't feel exactly like the flu. It hit me so fast last night in the middle of the night, Terribly achy and feel bad all over but seems like it's getting better.

Edited by - doll58maker on Nov 29 2015 12:44:56 PM
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