So many changes and losing myself. Does anyone share living accommodations with their adult child and their spouse? We share our house with our son and his new wife. I thought I had this under control because we have done this before with our other son and his wife. Financially it makes sense for all involved. Mentally for me not so much. If you do have these type of living arrangements How have you done it? What changes have you made? How do you let go of control of your space? I often heard about a kitchen being a woman's sanctuary and sharing this space is impossible, I believe it now. I am very clean & organized and use to run on a very tight schedule, But DIL came from a household with NO schedule or organization. Any tips or suggestions would be helpful. I have been told too many times to just teach or show her what to do she doesn't want to learn and my thoughts on that are I have raised my children and I am not at the point in my life where I want to raise another child.
YellowRose
True Blue Farmgirl
7110 Posts
Sara
Paris
TX
USA
7110 Posts
Posted - Mar 24 2019 : 04:43:49 AM
Lucy I see you are new to the Farm, welcome.
I haven't been in your situation so I have no answers for you but I do believe in seeking and holding on to inner peace. My hope for you is you will be able to hang on to your peace during this trying time and know this too shall pass.
Sara~~~ FarmGirl Sister #6034 8/25/14 FarmGirl of the Month Sept 2015. & Feb 2019
Lord put your arm around my shoulders and your hand over my mouth.
gramadinah
True Blue Farmgirl
3557 Posts
Diana
Orofino
ID
USA
3557 Posts
Posted - Mar 24 2019 : 3:25:36 PM
Talk to her. I am finding that people can't just talk explain to her your position and ask how the two of you can work it out. I had a chance to have my older brother and wife live with me for an extended period of time. From the very beginning I said I would do it on one condition that a line of communication was always available. No hurt feelings respect for each others ideas. It was fabulous.
Sara Thank you A little reminder that everything does pass is very helpful and I like your quote at the bottom. Diana Thank you I completely agree with lack of communication now days, I try and I will continue too. Were there any other ways you handled things like kitchen/space sharing
Edited by - LucyLobo48 on Mar 25 2019 06:06:04 AM
YellowRose
True Blue Farmgirl
7110 Posts
Sara
Paris
TX
USA
7110 Posts
Posted - Mar 25 2019 : 06:12:10 AM
Thanks Lucy, years ago that saying hung in my neighbor's kitchen. It spoke to me then and still does.
Sara~~~ FarmGirl Sister #6034 8/25/14 FarmGirl of the Month Sept 2015. & Feb 2019
Lord put your arm around my shoulders and your hand over my mouth.
churunga
True Blue Farmgirl
3957 Posts
Marie
Minneapolis
MN
USA
3957 Posts
Posted - Mar 30 2019 : 09:05:56 AM
In any negotiation, the first discussion can be what it is that both of you want. It may be possible to work out a solution based on the similarities of both situations. It may be that both of you have the more of the same desires with the use of the kitchen.
Full House Looking for Peace.
Posted - Mar 24 2019 : 04:18:00 AM
