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Family Matters:  Feeling Kind of Down  |
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Alee
True Blue Farmgirl
22944 Posts
22944 Posts |
 Posted - Feb 25 2007 : 11:55:58 AM
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I had an emotional day yesterday. A good friend of mine got married in a beautiful ceremony and had a wonderful reception. So that part of my day was great and I am so happy for her.
However when I got home my mom called to let me know my great aunt died yesterday of cancer. She just got diagnosed a little after or before Christmas. The hardest thing is they are about 1,000 miles away and being in my last month of pregnancy- I can't fly and driving is a horrible idea so I am stuck here and my family is there.
Then late last night DF and I got in a huge fight about some re-occuring issues in the relationship and ended up fighting for 2 hours- ending up with me crying and him near tears. *sighs*
One good thing is we did plow through our myriad issues until we reached some solvency.
But today I just feel down. I have to go to work and I just want to curl up in a little ball and sleep the day away.
Oh well, life goes on and this too shall pass- :)
I just had to get that off my chest. :)
Alee |
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MaryJane
Queen Bee
16916 Posts
MaryJane
Moscow
Idaho
USA
16916 Posts |
Posted - Feb 25 2007 : 12:04:49 PM
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| Are you at the ceramic place today? I can't remember for sure where you work? Pregnancy for me seemed to emphasize all my emotions, good and bad. But soon you'll have a smiling baby in your arms. One look into her eyes and you'll understand the essence of life and the universe! MJ |
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Love-in-a-Mist
True Blue Farmgirl
367 Posts
Shannon
Independence
Oregon
USA
367 Posts |
Posted - Feb 25 2007 : 12:08:28 PM
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I am so sorry for your loss, I feel for you not being able to go to the funeral with the rest of the family. I hope today gets better.
Shannon
Farmgirl and mother of 2
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willowtreecreek
True Blue Farmgirl
4813 Posts
Julie
Russell
AR
USA
4813 Posts |
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happymama58
True Blue Farmgirl
1210 Posts
Patti
Missouri
USA
1210 Posts |
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Marybeth
True Blue Farmgirl
6418 Posts
Mary Beth
Stanwood
Wa 98292
USA
6418 Posts |
Posted - Feb 25 2007 : 3:51:24 PM
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Alee, that last month is the worst to some. I hope you feel better and glad you did get some issues resolved. We'll be thinking about you 3. MB
www.strawberryhillsfarm.blogspot.com
www.day4plus.blogspot.com
"Life may not be the party we hoped for...but while we are here we might as well dance!" |
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Aunt George
True Blue Farmgirl
1476 Posts
Georgann
Midlothian
VA
1476 Posts |
Posted - Feb 25 2007 : 4:30:40 PM
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Alee...I can truly feel your pain through your words. You had such an emotional day yesterday which as MJ says is magnified by all of the pregnancy hormones in your system. At this stage, it is easy to cry at the drop of a hat. In one day, you experienced more than most of us experience in a month or more. First the wedding, which for me, weddings are always joy mixed with pain of varying degrees. You know that this young and hopefilled marriage will have its ups and its downs...just like all marriages. Perhaps during the wedding you think about all the plans unfulfilled, all the joys and all the sorrows. Weddings rank way up on the stress scale. Then you find out about your aunt and the stress of the quick illness and death and not being able to be there and have closure, with all of the guilt that goes along with that. Then a stressful conflict when you are already a bundle of nerves and tears. No wonder you are exhausted. Just growing a new life within your body is stress and fatigue and joy filled enough for each day. When you add those three major stressors all at once....wow....emotional tilt and overload!! It is OKAY that you are exhausted and want to just curl up and not move. That is your body's way of saying: slow down, relax, do something for you. So take time for yourself, even it is just for a minute, or an hour each day. Have that quiet cup of tea. Rub lotion on your tummy and talk to that new little life within you. Even as much as it may hurt, hug your DF, even if you don't feel like, you will feel a bit better for that too. Oh, please take care of yourself, perhaps take a respite from your job for a day. Well, I do tend to go on and on, so here is a ((((((HUG))))))
G
http://auntgeorgeshouse.blogspot.com/index.html
Thanks for checking out my apron and sewing musings! |
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daffodil dreamer
True Blue Farmgirl
805 Posts
Jayne
Hamilton
Victoria
Australia
805 Posts |
Posted - Feb 25 2007 : 5:59:23 PM
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Alee,
I'll be thinking of you and am always sending best wishes and happy thoughts your way. The last month can be very draining, both physically and emotionally. Just look after yourself and am so looking forward to hearing of the new little babe.
Best wishes,
Jayne
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ddmashayekhi
True Blue Farmgirl
4860 Posts
Dawn
Naperville
Illinois
USA
4860 Posts |
Posted - Feb 25 2007 : 6:48:05 PM
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The last few months of pregnancy can be quite a emotional roller coaster, not only for mom-to-be, but daddy too. Add that to the happiness of your friends wedding and the sad news of your great aunt's death and emotions can really spiral out of control. I'm sure your great aunt would have appreciated your thoughts and prayers. I'm sure she would have wanted you to stay home & take care of that baby! Life will settle down & before you know it the two of you will be celebrating the birth of your baby! Rest, relax, and pray!
Dawn in IL |
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westernhorse51
True Blue Farmgirl
1681 Posts
michele
farmingdale
n.j.
USA
1681 Posts |
Posted - Feb 25 2007 : 7:07:44 PM
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Im sorry your going through so much now while pregnant & of course for your loss. Being pregnant does bring out alot of emotions but just keep thinking of your wonderful new life that will soon be here.
she selects wool and flax and works with eager hands Prov.31:13 |
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Libbie
Farmgirl Connection Cultivator
3579 Posts
Anne E.
Elsinore
Utah
USA
3579 Posts |
Posted - Feb 25 2007 : 7:52:12 PM
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Oh, Alee - I know how those "down" days can be, especially while pregnant. Just know that there are loads of farmgirls out here sending you hugs and happy, safe thoughts...
XOXO, Libbie
"Nothing is worth more than this day." - Goethe |
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KYgurlsrbest
True Blue Farmgirl
4853 Posts
Jonni
Elsmere
Kentucky
USA
4853 Posts |
Posted - Feb 25 2007 : 8:09:11 PM
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I don't know anything about hormones with pregnancy, but I know that after a fight with my dh, even if we work things out, I'm still blue the next day or so. I just hate fighting so very much, even if it sometimes gets things out in the open.
Hopefully the sun will be shining where you are tomorrow, and these longer days will keep you looking forward to something happier (a baby and spring would do it, I think!!!)
Good luck and light!
Just think of all of the roads there are...all of the things I haven't seen....yet. |
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Alee
True Blue Farmgirl
22944 Posts
22944 Posts |
Posted - Feb 25 2007 : 11:46:22 PM
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Thank you everyone for all you kind words of love and support. When I got to work I really didn't want to be there and even asked if I could go home early *which I NEVER do*. But I did end up working my whole shift and I am really glad I did. If I had gone home I think I would have felt like I gave in to my little depression and I am feeling better every hour.
I wrote DF a note of things I needed him to get done around the house- and he actually did everything! So I came home to a slightly cleaner house and we spent some time together re-connecting a little bit.
I also found out that my great aunt wanted to have a Spring-Time memorial ceremony in her back yard so they are going to postpone the service to follow her wishes. Another good thing is that Spring time comes late to the mountains of Wyoming so hopefully I will be able to fly down for the service- whenever it does get scheduled.
In many ways it really is a blessing that my Aunt has passed away- Her doctor had told her that she just had a hernia, but then they finally figured out that it was cancer. By this time (beginning of the year) she was already going down hill. I know that she was in pain and now she can rest. Mostly I am sad that I can't be there to support my family. My grandfather (my great-aunt's brother) who also has not been well.
Logically I understand the path of life, but it is always hard to have those close to us leave. Each person has such an amazing story to tell and I always feel that the world has lost something precious when some one passes on. The experiences that my grandparent's generation lived through can really help teach the new generations many valuable things, and it terrifies me that these recollections and stories are slowly being lost.
Anyway- you all are wonderful and I feel better after reading all your loving posts. You all are a truly unique and loving bunch and I am grateful to call you friends.
Thanks :)
Alee |
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mellaisbella
True Blue Farmgirl
1862 Posts
melanie
living on Anne of Green
Gables land
Canada
1862 Posts |
Posted - Feb 26 2007 : 06:50:13 AM
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Great big Canadian hugs going out to you Alee....I too have been going through some tough times (thanks to all of you ladies that have lifted me up!!) I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers. HUGS Mella
"learn to watch snails" SARK |
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shelle
True Blue Farmgirl
404 Posts
Shelle
oklahoma
USA
404 Posts |
Posted - Feb 26 2007 : 10:13:53 AM
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Big Hugs for you Alee,
You poor thing! I know it is tough on you not being with your family when when your great aunt has passed away. Also working through issues with your father at this point in your pregnancy has to be very emotional for you.
If you can I hope you focus on the good things that happened: You friend had a beautiful wedding and is starting a new life, your poor aunt is no longer suffering, you have worked out some issues that you needed to with your dad and you have a beautiful baby coming soon!
I will send up prayers for you and your family. I hope that things go better for you and that you have a healthy happy baby.
Hugs
Shelle
http://janzenfamilyjournal.blogspot.com/ |
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Mumof3
True Blue Farmgirl
3890 Posts
Karin
Ellenwood
GA
USA
3890 Posts |
Posted - Feb 26 2007 : 10:53:19 AM
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Sending a big hug your way Alee. I am so sorry.
Karin |
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Beemoosie
True Blue Farmgirl
2077 Posts
Bonnie
New York
USA
2077 Posts |
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Past Blessings
True Blue Farmgirl
1083 Posts
Brenda
Orchard Prairie
WA
USA
1083 Posts |
Posted - Feb 26 2007 : 12:10:36 PM
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Hi Alee,
I am so glad they postponed your aunts service, so that you can be a part of it. That will help you find the closure you need. As for your fight with your fiance, I would probably chalk most of that up to hormones and the emotions of having just lost your aunt. And, if it helped you solve some issues, it was well worth it. But I completely understand the exhaustion that followed. When I fight with my husband, which isn't often, I feel like I have just been put through the wringer. It is all part of life. It's just how we deal with it that affects us long term. You can put a positive spin on it when you talk to your fiance. You can say I am glad we resolved that issue and are now free to move on and enjoy this last month of awaiting the arrival of a little blessing. Hugs and prayers . . .
Brenda
Past Blessings . . . Celebrating Life as it used to be . . . when people loved God, loved their families and loved their country. |
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Tracey
True Blue Farmgirl
766 Posts
Tracey
State of Confusion
USA
766 Posts |
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shelle
True Blue Farmgirl
404 Posts
Shelle
oklahoma
USA
404 Posts |
Posted - Feb 26 2007 : 5:17:08 PM
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OH Alee
I am so glad that you will be able to be with your family at your aunts memorial after all. What a beautiful memorial it will be in the springtime in the Wyoming mountains. It will be a wonderful tribute to her! I am glad you and your dad are connecting better and that your spirits are higher.......... You keep them up as best you can and I will certainly keep you in my prayers.
Big Hugs
Shelle
http://janzenfamilyjournal.blogspot.com/ |
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katiedid
True Blue Farmgirl
601 Posts
Kate
West Jordan
Utah
USA
601 Posts |
Posted - Feb 26 2007 : 5:22:22 PM
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Alee,
I certainly can understand...What an emotionally weekend for you! My grandpa died when I was hugely pregnant with my third child, and it was really hard...I have joke, which might not be too funny for you now, but you'll understand when your hormones get back to "normal"
There is a raging lunatic inside every pregnant woman!
I remember Eldon (my dh) and I having a huge fight about something so stupid (I can't even remember *what* now) while I was pregnant! I was going to run out of the house and into the car in only my underwear!! He was trying to get me to calm down, and I was yelling through tears that I just wanted him to stop treating me like a child!! Seriously, I was a freak!! I remember reading a children's book and sobbing...Or getting so mad over stuff that I wouldn't normally bat an eyelash over...
Pregnancy is tough, but you'll get through it all: death in the family and arguments with your partner...
Take some special time out just for you....I call "exteme self care" nothing major, and it doesn't even have to cost money...just do something nice for yourself....take a long bath and do an extra conditioning treatment on your hair; or after fixing dinner make it extra special by lighting some candles and really enjoying your meal; give yourself a pedicure; get a extra good chocolate bar and put your feet up, enjoying the feeling of the yummy sweetness as it melts on your tongue!
Know that I thinking of you...
Love and light to you, hang in there
Kate
my new blog http/www.theknifemakerswife.wordpress.com |
Edited by - katiedid on Feb 26 2007 5:27:00 PM |
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Alee
True Blue Farmgirl
22944 Posts
22944 Posts |
Posted - Feb 26 2007 : 6:24:08 PM
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Thanks ladies-
I just realized reading a few replies that DF could mean many things to many people :)
In my case I was referring to Dear Fiance- not Dear Dad. :) |
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Family Matters: Feeling Kind of Down |
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Feeling Kind of Down
