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Parenting & Farm Kids:  If anyone has any doubts......  |
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Mumof3
True Blue Farmgirl
3890 Posts
Karin
Ellenwood
GA
USA
3890 Posts |
 Posted - Dec 12 2006 : 3:03:12 PM
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On the effect that pornography has on children, just ask me. I spent this afternoon in a knock-down-drag-out with my 20 year-old disabled son because I caught him looking at it on our computer. The look on his face was chilling, as was the anger that overcame him. I now have the beginnings of a black eye and an egg-shaped knot on my arm from the towel bar he hit me with. He is very lucky. All I could think of was "I brought you into this world, I can take you out of it." He is still agitated and trying to get at me. It has completely taken over any sense of goodness that he has. So please, girls, be aware of what your children are doing on the computer. Even the most innocent search can bring about something very unsavory. Ours is out in the open, but I was baking cookies and not really paying attention. It is such a sly, insidious thing.
And I have to go to a church meeting tonight, shiner and all.
Be safe.
Karin |
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Aunt Jenny
True Blue Farmgirl
11381 Posts
Jenny
middle of
Utah
USA
11381 Posts |
Posted - Dec 12 2006 : 3:16:43 PM
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Oh Karin! I agree that it can cause such pain in so many ways. I will sure keep you and your son in my prayers. Bummer that you have to go to church with a shiner..and the questions about it I am sure. Take care!!!! hugs from here...
Jenny in Utah
Inside me there is a skinny woman crying to get out...but I can usually shut her up with cookies
http://www.auntjennysworld.blogspot.com/ visit my little online shop at www.auntjenny.etsy.com |
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doglady
True Blue Farmgirl
435 Posts
Tina
Howard
Ohio
USA
435 Posts |
Posted - Dec 12 2006 : 4:11:11 PM
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Hi Karin,
I'm so sorry that it became physical. However, I think that I have a solution for you. You should call the company that made your computer, ex. Dell, and ask for technical support, and ask them to walk you through the steps to set up a "Bios Password". This will place a password on the core brain of the computer. **Don't ever forget the password as you won't be able to get in either**. Here's how it works: when the computer is first turned on, you will get a black DOS screen that will ask for the password, you have three tries to get it correct or the computer gives you a message of "incorrect password, the system is powering down". The computer will not move forward one inch without the correct password. Therefore, you control the computer of who's on it and when. It has worked in my house and I have some really computer savy teens. Just an idea. It has saved us a lot of fighting and stress.
Tina
The dogs own the house but the people pay the mortgage!
www.kennelcreations.com |
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jpbluesky
True Blue Farmgirl
6066 Posts
Jeannie
Florida
USA
6066 Posts |
Posted - Dec 12 2006 : 4:18:40 PM
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Karin - my heart goes out to you. I will pray for you and your son. And know that it can be in any of our hearts. We are all sinners, and I know your son must be tangling with many conflicting demons and just wants to be normal and human and gosh - we love you! And Jesus will give you strength!
Ephesians 1:17 |
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blueroses
True Blue Farmgirl
1323 Posts
Debbie
in the Pandhandle of
Idaho
USA
1323 Posts |
Posted - Dec 12 2006 : 4:23:47 PM
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So sorry, Karin. I hope you're okay (inside and out). Porn is very addicting and I think the password is a good idea. We want to trust our kids, but it is so easy to find this stuff.
"You cannot find peace...by avoiding life."
Virginia Woolfe |
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Clare
True Blue Farmgirl
2173 Posts
NC WA State
USA
2173 Posts |
Posted - Dec 12 2006 : 6:07:45 PM
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Karin, I'm not sure exactly how, but there are ways of blocking porn on your computer. Check with your ISP. I think it has something to do with filters and all. It might be something you could implement.
Hugs to you.
Humor is the prelude to faith and Laughter is the beginning of prayer. -- Reinhold Niebuhr
http://farmstyle.blogspot.com
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ArmyWifey
True Blue Farmgirl
712 Posts
Holly
Abilene
KS
712 Posts |
Posted - Dec 12 2006 : 9:59:56 PM
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Do any of you have NetNanny or something like it? While this hasn't been a problem yet I've thought about purchasing it.
As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord!
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Phils Ann
True Blue Farmgirl
1095 Posts
Ann
Parsonsburg
Maryland
USA
1095 Posts |
Posted - Dec 13 2006 : 04:15:44 AM
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Karin, I'm so grieved for you... and for your son as he has this power gripping him-- I echo jpbluesky absolutely. I also hope you can get the filter. My SIL would like to do that because my nephew views porn... but my brother nixed it. GRRRR
Love,
Ann
There is a Redeemer. |
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doglady
True Blue Farmgirl
435 Posts
Tina
Howard
Ohio
USA
435 Posts |
Posted - Dec 13 2006 : 06:04:41 AM
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Karin, our kids are so computer savy now because, unlike us, they have been on computers since first grade. While it's always great to trust our kids, once the bad sites get your IP address they bombard you with undesireable spam mail. I tried several different blocker programs and my son cracked every one of them. He even knows how to get online using someone elses internet provider. I told him he should go into computers several times!! LOL However, after I finally placed the Bios password on the computer, no more problems. Once the spamming starts, they can bring in viruses that can crash your computer. The "My Space" site is realllllly bad for this sort of thing too. My Space is off limits in this house. Hope you're feeling better ; )
Tina
The dogs own the house but the people pay the mortgage!
www.kennelcreations.com |
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Mumof3
True Blue Farmgirl
3890 Posts
Karin
Ellenwood
GA
USA
3890 Posts |
Posted - Dec 13 2006 : 06:24:22 AM
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Thank you everyone for all of your kind thoughts and advice and prayers. I did have the computer set up where you had to enter a password everytime a new webpage popped up. Inconvenient yes, but totally worth it. I had disabled it for my daughter who was working on a school project so she could just plow through it and forgot to reset it. Boy, am I sorry. To explain John, he is my deaf child who is mild-moderate MI (mentally-impaired) and had mild CP. I always thought that it was a blessing that he could not hear all of the terrible things that swirl around us on a daily basis and that he was sort of protected, in some ways, from the world. We have always tried to maintain protection from these sorts of things for our children. What apparently started as innocently typing random words into Google (my mortal enemy right now) turned into a view of the more base side of life. And apparently it was appealing to him and an eye-opener to say the least. The scary part is how quickly this overtook him. Just a matter of 3 days and it hooked him in. We talked about it quite a bit last night at our welfare meeting and how dangerous all of this really is. It will be a long road for this little boy (who, although he is physically 20, is not mentally 20) And a stronger defense will be built around the Smith household to be sure. His dad and brother gave him a blessing last night to help him overcome all of this and to let him know how much he is loved not only by us, but by his Heavenly Father and that he will be assisted in his efforts to resist the temptation that will surely come his way. In the meantime, I have a lovely magenta Nike swish forming under my right eye, a very visible reminder to him of what he did to me. Maybe it's a good thing it's there. I am now trying to focus on what I can do to help John. Oh, and decorate my house for Christmas- I think I need a pleasant distration for a bit.
Karin |
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bramble
True Blue Farmgirl
2044 Posts
2044 Posts |
Posted - Dec 13 2006 : 07:29:34 AM
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Karin- I haven't experienced this (yet) but I am so sorry that this happened. We love and trust our kids but the reality is that the media culture in this country throws this in their faces everyday.
I hope that all our prayers for a resolution will help your family and regret that violence became a part of this situation. Please know you are in my thoughts and prayers. Love, Bramble
with a happy heart |
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katiedid
True Blue Farmgirl
601 Posts
Kate
West Jordan
Utah
USA
601 Posts |
Posted - Dec 13 2006 : 09:58:29 AM
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OH, Karin!
I am so sorry...I know this is such an epidemic, and I wish we could do what you just said....keep our kids protected from all of it! But, truley, we can't!
The internet is such a great thing! So much good information available, just at our fingertips....think of geneology and missionary work. And the flip side of it is all the filth that can "overtake" our thinking in just a matter of hours! Poor John. I am so sad for him, I can just imagine how confusing this is for him! I can just bet that trying to explain how something that seems so exciting and titalating is so bad for him is very difficult. For someone like John, who essentially is a child in a man's body, he probably can't grasp why something that feels good, is really bad. His world is black and white...and the internet porn-thing has so many shades of grey...
Karin, I am sorry you were hurt. But, like you said, maybe a physical reminder will be good for John.
I have been watching the "Dateline, to catch a predator" investigation shows about people who track internet predators and I am just shocked! We should be sooo careful.
I will be praying for you
Love and light to you,
Kate
my new blog http/www.theknifemakerswife.wordpress.com |
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BarefootGoatGirl
True Blue Farmgirl
1495 Posts
Corrine
North Carolina
USA
1495 Posts |
Posted - Dec 13 2006 : 6:08:30 PM
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I am so sorry to hear about this experience and the toll it has taken on your entire family. I am truely greatful that the Lord allowed you to catch it before it went any further. I will keep you all in my prayers.
Trina
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Be thou diligent to know the state of thy flocks, and look well to thy herds. Proverbs 27:23 |
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Parenting & Farm Kids: If anyone has any doubts...... |
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If anyone has any doubts......
