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Across the Fence:  Hi Ladies! I missed you!  |
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Alee
True Blue Farmgirl
22944 Posts
22944 Posts |
 Posted - Dec 21 2015 : 1:08:19 PM
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Hi Ladies!
It’s been so long! For that I am so sorry! I have missed you all greatly but life has kept me busy and away from the computer. It’s amazing how quickly time goes by!
So much has changed; it’s hard to know where to start. I finished college and have my Business Management and Accounting Degree. We moved from Montana down to Wyoming because Doug got a job in our home town where I really wanted to be. We lived with my parents for some time while we worked on our credit and I finally was able to get a cute little 1942 Bungalow style house. I will post pictures some time. I wish I had taken more before and after pictures. I tore up the carpet and found beautiful original hardwood floors underneath. They need to be refinished but someday they will just glow.
Things didn’t go so well for Doug. He lost 5 jobs in two and a half years. He is currently unemployed. I finally asked for a divorce this summer. It was a hard decision to make but I have been working on making this decision for a long long time. From his violent outbursts to the constant cheating to his unwillingness to work on his many mental health issues- the relationship just became more and more toxic. Our divorce was finalized in July and we decided to split custody of Nora 50/50.
Well that all changed recently. He threatened to take Nora with him back to Moscow. When I told him I was not okay with that he got very angry with me. A few days later Department of Family Services shows up on my door step asking to inspect my house and interview Nora. After they looked over every inch of my house and talked with both me and Nora, they told me that they had no concerns with me. They asked many questions and it quickly became apparent that Doug had lied to them to get them to my house. It seems to me that he was hoping that I would somehow be deemed an unfit mother and he would get custody by default.
Thankfully I found an amazing lawyer who took my case on. We have already served Doug with a Custody Modification summons. We are going to fight for sole custody and give him visitation rights. Until then every time she visits her dad’s house I hold my breath hoping he doesn’t take off with her.
Alee
Farmgirl Sister #8
www.farmgirlalee.blogspot.com
www.allergyjourneys.blogspot.com
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gramadinah
True Blue Farmgirl
3557 Posts
Diana
Orofino
ID
USA
3557 Posts |
Posted - Dec 21 2015 : 1:16:52 PM
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If he comes to Moscow with her keep me posted I have lots of friends in the area.But that bring said I hope it never happens. Have you also talked to Nora and explained that it is not right and that she can tell anybody at any time that she is not where she is to be and I would also get a phone for her with a GPS chip.
I have missed you here too.
Diana
Farmgirl Sister #273 |
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Alee
True Blue Farmgirl
22944 Posts
22944 Posts |
Posted - Dec 21 2015 : 1:24:39 PM
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Hi Diana-
Right now it doesn't seem like Nora knows too much about his plans. She has an Iphone and as much as I hate having to pay for the cellular on it, I turned that service back on so I can track her movements. Since he was served he has tried backtracking, begging me to call off the litigation etc and saying he isn't going to move. But I can't take that chance at this point. He has been getting more and more emotionally unstable over that past few years and has been going on and off depression medications as he feels like it- without help from a doctor. Not only that but he hasn't been following the divorce decree stipulations. I had to buy all her school clothes, school supplies and paid for her very expensive dental work this summer out of my own pocket even though all of that is supposed to be 50/50. I also am stuck paying for his car insurance and telephone because they are bundled with mine and I have to wait out the end of the contract to sever that. He is supposed to be paying me for those as well but hasn't.
I will definitely tell you if he tries to take her or succeeds in taking her. At least if he heads towards Moscow I know people there. The scariest thought is if he takes her and goes somewhere new. :(
Some Cuteness: Nora was a red fox for Halloween!
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Alee
Farmgirl Sister #8
www.farmgirlalee.blogspot.com
www.allergyjourneys.blogspot.com
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Edited by - Alee on Dec 21 2015 1:27:12 PM |
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LadyInRed
True Blue Farmgirl
6740 Posts
PeggyAnn
Vancouver
WA
USA
6740 Posts |
Posted - Dec 21 2015 : 1:34:41 PM
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Alee your life seems chaotic and stressful. I pray your ex doesn't do anything foolish and stupid where your daughter is concerned. ~ Your cottage sounds adorable and I am glad you ended up in your hometown before the split. Praying for you and your daughter!!!
Merry Christmas and a Happier New Year,
Peggy
Farmgirl #1326
Dec 2011-Farmgirl of the Month
http://ladyinredsite.blogspot.com
Don't allow others to steal the Glitz from your *SPARKLE*
Life is too short to knit with ugly yarn!
Leave Your Cares Behind...Join Us On The Porch |
Edited by - LadyInRed on Dec 21 2015 1:35:50 PM |
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Alee
True Blue Farmgirl
22944 Posts
22944 Posts |
Posted - Dec 21 2015 : 2:15:05 PM
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Thank you Peggy!
Right now I am just praying my horse trailer sells soon! My lawyer took pity on me and my financial situation. He said he starts out at $5,000 and that these types of issues it is not uncommon for his fees to get close to $20,000! But since he knows my sister and his partner works with my boss often I only have to pay his retainer and then any filing fees etc. So I owe him the $5,000 plus maybe a few hundred on top of that. So please pray someone wants a horse trailer for Christmas too!
Alee
Farmgirl Sister #8
www.farmgirlalee.blogspot.com
www.allergyjourneys.blogspot.com
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katmom
True Blue Farmgirl
17453 Posts
Grace
WACAL Gal
WashCalif.
USA
17453 Posts |
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ceejay48
Farmgirl Legend/Schoolmarm/Sharpshooter
13863 Posts
CeeJay (CJ)
Dolores
Colorado
USA
13863 Posts |
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Alee
True Blue Farmgirl
22944 Posts
22944 Posts |
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KristiW
Moderator/Farmgirl True
639 Posts
Kristine
MaryJanesFarm
USA
639 Posts |
Posted - Dec 22 2015 : 08:37:17 AM
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Such a hard place to be Alee, but it is apparent it's the right path. I will hold you and your daughter in my thoughts. May we be strong women.
Kristine
Farmgirl Sister #6
Not all who wander are lost. |
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Marcy
True Blue Farmgirl
2701 Posts
Marcy
Tiverton
Rhode Island
USA
2701 Posts |
Posted - Dec 22 2015 : 09:35:23 AM
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Alee,
I am so glad to see that you are back with us! And also so sorry to hear what you are going through. Know that we are here and that we have your back. You are never alone!
hugs,
Marcy
Farmgirl #170
FGOTM August 2012
Since you get more joy out of giving joy to others, you should put a good deal of thought into the happiness that you are able to give...Eleanor Roosevelt
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Bonnie Ellis
True Blue Farmgirl
2474 Posts
Bonnie
Minneapolis
Minnesota
USA
2474 Posts |
Posted - Dec 22 2015 : 12:08:28 PM
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Alee: Such deep problems. I pray for strength for you to cope and safety for you and Nora. God bless.
grandmother and orphan farmgirl |
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Red Tractor Girl
True Blue Farmgirl
6839 Posts
Winnie
Gainesville
Fl
USA
6839 Posts |
Posted - Dec 23 2015 : 05:54:34 AM
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Welcome back, Alee! I hope your will be able to get the legal issues resolved soon with Nora. Please keep us posted and best of luck with all that is currently needing your undivided attentions!
Winnie #3109
Red Tractor Girl
Farm Sister of the Year 2014-2015 |
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Marybeth
True Blue Farmgirl
6418 Posts
Mary Beth
Stanwood
Wa 98292
USA
6418 Posts |
Posted - Dec 23 2015 : 11:45:02 AM
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Hi Alee--good to hear from you. I hate to say this but I will---I knew the marriage was doomed from the time you were preggers with Nora. Such a hard row you had to hoe but you persevered. Proud of you girl. Glad you got your degree.
Here's hoping the New Year brings you and Nora much needed happiness.
MB
http://www.smallcityscenes.blogspot.com
www.day4plus.blogspot.com
"Life may not be the party we hoped for...but while we are here we might as well dance!" |
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levisgrammy
True Blue Farmgirl
9666 Posts
Denise
Beavercreek
Ohio
USA
9666 Posts |
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auntjenny
True Blue Farmgirl
277 Posts
Jenny
San Luis Obispo
CA
USA
277 Posts |
Posted - Dec 26 2015 : 11:03:47 AM
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Alee! Sooo good to see you back here! I have been where you are. More than once. No fun. You will get past this and things will be better. (((((Hugs)))))
Dream like you have a lifetime ahead of you. Live like you only have today. |
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FARMALLChick
True Blue Farmgirl
978 Posts
Lora
Alexandria
IN
USA
978 Posts |
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craftingram
True Blue Farmgirl
528 Posts
Karin
Nashville
In
USA
528 Posts |
Posted - Dec 28 2015 : 06:43:14 AM
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Alee, so glad to see you back here. I always loved reading your posts having to do with faith. I'm so sorry you are having to deal with this situation, but believe that you and Nora will come through it well. Your little house sounds adorable and we are looking forward to pictures. Keeping you and Nora in prayer.
Karin
Farmgirl Sister 2708
Romans 8: 38,39 |
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sjmjgirl
True Blue Farmgirl
566 Posts
Stephanie
Mt. Vernon
Iowa
USA
566 Posts |
Posted - Dec 28 2015 : 12:31:29 PM
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Alee, great to see you posting again! So sorry you've had to go through this. Have you considered asking the court for supervised visits since he has threatened to run off with her? It certainly seems warranted, at least for now.
Hoping things get better for you both quickly. Farmgirl hugs!
Farmgirl Sister # 3810
Learn the rules so you know how to break them properly.
- Dalai Lama
April is Autism Awareness month. Autism affects 1 in 88 children (1 in 54 boys, including my son). Go to http://www.autismspeaks.org/ to learn more and help Light It Up Blue on April 2nd!
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Edited by - sjmjgirl on Dec 28 2015 12:32:12 PM |
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Bear5
True Blue Farmgirl
13055 Posts
Louisiana/Texas
USA
13055 Posts |
Posted - Dec 28 2015 : 1:16:40 PM
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Hi Alee! How nice to see your post. I have certainly missed all your chats. I am sorry for all that you have been through. You and Nora will be in my prayers. Take care and keep us posted.
Marly
"It's only when we truly know and understand that we have a limited time on earth- and that we have no way of knowing when our time is up- that we will begin to live each day to the fullest, as if it was the only one we had." Elisabeth Kurler-Ross |
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ClaireSky
True Blue Farmgirl
1792 Posts
Julie
Arcadia
WI
USA
1792 Posts |
Posted - Dec 30 2015 : 08:41:44 AM
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Alee, I am glad to see you posting again. Sad to hear what you are going through. Praying for you and Nora. God Bless!!
Julie 
Farmgirl #399
May 2010 Farmgirl of the Month
Folks will know how large your soul is by the way you treat a dog ... Charles F. Doran |
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Alee
True Blue Farmgirl
22944 Posts
22944 Posts |
Posted - Dec 30 2015 : 09:43:49 AM
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Thank you so much for all your love and prayers ladies! I can't tell you how much it means to me. I have been bed ridden with high fever since Sunday so I haven't checked in much. Starting to feel much better though. I am hoping today will be the last day of this fever business. I haven't heard anything for a while from Doug about the court action. In the paper my lawyer put together he asked for Doug to get appropriate visitation as determined by the court after Doug had gone through a full mental health screening and shows compliance with the doctors orders.
Alee
Farmgirl Sister #8
www.farmgirlalee.blogspot.com
www.allergyjourneys.blogspot.com
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Bonnie Ellis
True Blue Farmgirl
2474 Posts
Bonnie
Minneapolis
Minnesota
USA
2474 Posts |
Posted - Dec 30 2015 : 6:15:10 PM
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Get well Alee. all this stress takes its toll. We'll pray for you. God bless and Happy New Year.
grandmother and orphan farmgirl |
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Alee
True Blue Farmgirl
22944 Posts
22944 Posts |
Posted - Jan 04 2016 : 8:28:00 PM
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Oh my word Ladies! I got a very upset text from Nora on Saturday. She needed me to come get her RIGHT then! Basically Doug is pulling his manipulative stuff on Nora now and she is catching on in a major way! Good news is that she called me and she is safe here this week. I also sold my horse trailer today so that is good. It sold for less than I needed so now I still need to come up with $1500 to finish paying the lawyer fees but that is doable. What a roller coaster!
Alee
Farmgirl Sister #8
www.farmgirlalee.blogspot.com
www.allergyjourneys.blogspot.com
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DandeeRose
True Blue Farmgirl
1509 Posts
Alicia
Charlestown, IN
1509 Posts |
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Alee
True Blue Farmgirl
22944 Posts
22944 Posts |
Posted - Oct 07 2016 : 3:45:01 PM
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Hi Ladies!
Just wanted to give you an update! Doug finally caved and we worked out and agreement that the judge signed without having to drag Nora through a court battle. I now have sole legal custody of her, but the visitation schedule stays the same- one week with me, one week with him. I no longer have to pay child support and he is court ordered to pay me the money he owes me however I doubt I will ever see any of it. He is not allowed to take her if he moves more than 30 minutes away from here and if he does, we have to go to mediation to work out a new visitation schedule. I am slowly paying off the remainder of my lawyer bill too. I have about $1000 left to go but at least the balance is going down! All in all it worked out about as good as I could have hoped. It got rather nasty there for a while.
Nora is also settling down into the new normal of our lives- which is great and for that I am very thankful. We are going to be making pies and such this weekend, getting some good memories made before she has to go to her dad's house again. I am starting to really dislike Sundays because that is the day that we switch custody.
Alee
Farmgirl Sister #8
www.farmgirlalee.blogspot.com
www.allergyjourneys.blogspot.com
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ceejay48
Farmgirl Legend/Schoolmarm/Sharpshooter
13863 Posts
CeeJay (CJ)
Dolores
Colorado
USA
13863 Posts |
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Across the Fence: Hi Ladies! I missed you! |
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Hi Ladies! I missed you!
