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Family Matters:  home from the marines  |
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dargaonfly1054
True Blue Farmgirl
257 Posts
Georgette
Nicholville
NY
USA
257 Posts |
 Posted - Nov 16 2006 : 1:06:39 PM
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Do any of you out there have a child that is newly out of the armed forces and refuses to admit that there might be a problem with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder? If there are I would love to talk with you. My son was a marine and served one tour in Iraq and he "seems" to be holding things inside. 
"There is a voice that doesn't use words........Listen." |
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ArmyWifey
True Blue Farmgirl
712 Posts
Holly
Abilene
KS
712 Posts |
Posted - Nov 16 2006 : 7:29:04 PM
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I don't have a son however, hubby has been twice. The biggest thing is don't push.......no matter how curious you are. Time to process is so important! The guidelines the Army puts out is that startling at loud noises, trouble in crowds, anxiety attacks, nightmares and waking,anger,not being able to drive( in Iraq you don't stop at red lights, you take the whole road and they have been so focused on how to get from here to there safely he may not remember where to turn for Walmart etc)and other attitudes are all "normal" reactions to war unless they last over 6-8 weeks, or are extreme - to the exclusion of everything else. Many times some little thing will happen and he will just start talking. (Try to remember that even in "normal" situations men respond differently and don't tend to talk as much as we do anyhow!)
He needs to know the most right now that you love him, accept him, are proud of his service and don't judge him (wheather he fired shots, killed someone, was wounded or not).
If he wants to sleep on the floor, keeps odd hours etc try to roll with the flow for now.
If things are extreme or he seems seriously depressed then by all means seek treatment. The Marines should provide help as he's a vet. You may have to jump through hoops but if you are persistant you will get there.
Hope that helps.
Please tell your son thank you.
Holly
As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord!
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Edited by - ArmyWifey on Nov 16 2006 9:40:11 PM |
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ArmyWifey
True Blue Farmgirl
712 Posts
Holly
Abilene
KS
712 Posts |
Posted - Nov 16 2006 : 9:38:09 PM
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additonal thoughts: your son is probably feeling very alone at the moment....lets face it mom you can't really relate. You weren't there, dont' know what it was like, his buddies do. It's hard and takes some readjusting to step back from the battle buddy mentality and there will never be that bond over that situation that he has with his buddies.
perhaps articulating to him that you love him, are proud of him and understand that he may feel alone right now, or like no one else understands but that you are there whenever he needs/wants to talk is enough for now.
Also if he can't watch certain movies or books or games that's normal too, although my hubby and his friends all seem to be perfectly able to play war games on the computer still..........which I don't understand but ok.
again hope that helps,
Holly
As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord!
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dargaonfly1054
True Blue Farmgirl
257 Posts
Georgette
Nicholville
NY
USA
257 Posts |
Posted - Nov 19 2006 : 07:52:46 AM
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Thank you both so much! You have given me many things to think about. It hadn't even occurred to me that he may be feeling very "alone".......No I can't relate, at all. I've been trying harder to be more understanding and as soon as the opportunity presents itself I plan on trying to get some alone time with him and try talking to him that he has a shoulder to "cry" on if he needs it....He did tell me he had a dream about "armagedon" and he didn't understand it. That right there gave me a clue to what might be going onin his head, that he might be trying to deny.
Thank you both so much. Georgette
"There is a voice that doesn't use words........Listen." |
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Family Matters: home from the marines |
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home from the marines
