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Family Matters:  Future Mother-in-law  |
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fiddlegirl89
True Blue Farmgirl
232 Posts
Kayla
Dunnville
KY
USA
232 Posts |
 Posted - Jul 13 2012 : 09:24:24 AM
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I've heard a lot of horror stories about the awful mother-in-law...but I just wanted to brag a bit. I'm going to have a great mother-in-law! Yesterday I was at Goodwill and my future sister-in-law came in, and her mom and the other girls (there are four sisters) were out in the car. They're having a get-together this weekend so I went out to talk to her about what I needed to bring. Well, I ended up staying out there talking to her for over an hour. She was asking me all about our wedding plans and what I had in mind. She is amazing when it comes to hosting large parties (think 100 people) and is just the perfect hostess...she makes everyone feel at home, mingles and visits (half the time while nursing the baby!) and it's just amazing...especially to me, who grew up pretty unsociable and loner-ish! She's my hero when it comes to hosting.
So anyway, she told me yesterday that she had lots of experience with get-togethers and that she was more than willing to help me in any way she could, but she never wanted me to feel like she was telling me how things had to be or anything like that. She said it was my day and that she was available to help me make everything just how I wanted it. But she wanted me to know she would never overstep her bounds. Wow.
Then we go on talking about everything else. She said Jacob was 24, I was 23, and it was time to begin our life together. She said we wouldn't be like her and her husband, and we wouldn't be like my parents, we would be Jacob and Kayla and that's exactly how it should be. That we shouldn't think we had to be like either of our parents, we should be us.
She said she had an extra washer and dryer that she wasn't using in the basement , and she was going to see if it still worked fine, and move them over to our house. She said as soon as we settled on a date she would start telling everyone she knew that we needed furniture, if they were getting rid of stuff.
Back to the wedding...I told her I was thinking I'd make my cake. She fussed at me...in a very loving way! She told me I'd be so worked up I really didn't need to think about decorating a cake the day before. She asked about photography, and I told her that's the one thing I'd really wanted, but financially it wasn't looking good. She said she knew a lot of folks and would do some research and see what she could find. She also said she'd look into cakes...see what she could find for me.
I'm just so thrilled with the way our relationship is developing. Our house is two places down from their house and she told me she was out in the garden the other day, and just thought about how neat it was going to be to have me there and around all the time...someone else to talk to and do stuff with. Her daughters are 14 and younger, so it's almost like I'm not a daughter, but more of a friend.
I'm sure there will eventually be times where we clash, but for now everything is wonderful. I realize I don't have the experience being part of another family yet!
www.crazykcreates.blogspot.com
www.crazykcreates1.etsy.com
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knittingmom
True Blue Farmgirl
665 Posts
AnneMarie
Edmonton
Alberta
Canada
665 Posts |
Posted - Jul 13 2012 : 09:28:44 AM
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You're very lucky to have a wonderful future mother-in-law, enjoy. Good luck with the wedding and all the best for the future.
Farmgirl Sister #3759
"There is no foot so small that it cannot leave an imprint on this world"
"The things that matter most are not really things after all" |
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Lessie Louise
True Blue Farmgirl
1406 Posts
Carol
PECULIAR
MO
USA
1406 Posts |
Posted - Jul 13 2012 : 09:35:35 AM
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I love what she said about "you would be Jacob and Kayla" that's priceless advice. You are blessed
....it's what's inside a women, when she's up against the land.
Farmgirl #680!
http://www.etsy.com/shop/lessielouise22 |
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Emily Anna
True Blue Farmgirl
863 Posts
Emily
Fort Atkinson
WI
USA
863 Posts |
Posted - Jul 13 2012 : 10:37:10 AM
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Kayla,
What a blessing to be marrying into a loving family and not some of the horror stories you hear. I'm excited for you!
Emily |
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nubidane
True Blue Farmgirl
3004 Posts
Lisa
Georgetown
OH
3004 Posts |
Posted - Jul 13 2012 : 11:18:56 AM
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| Apparently Jacob is not the only one who realizes what a "catch" you are!! LOL |
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Ninibini
True Blue Farmgirl
7577 Posts
Nini
Pennsylvania
USA
7577 Posts |
Posted - Jul 13 2012 : 11:27:55 AM
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I'm with Lisa, Kayla! I am sure your mother-in-law must be thrilled to have such a wonderful daughter-in-law-to-be, too! You are very blessed, indeed! I'm so happy for you! Sounds like Jacob's Mom is ALSO a keeper! YAY!!! Lucky you!!! Hugs - Nini
Farmgirl Sister #1974
God gave us two hands... one to help ourselves, and one to help others!
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Ga Girl
True Blue Farmgirl
2355 Posts
Karen
Meansville
Ga.
USA
2355 Posts |
Posted - Jul 13 2012 : 12:20:40 PM
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I am fortunate to have a good mil too. They are very lucky to be getting such a sweet new family member. Blessings, Karen
Create in me a pure heart,O God and renew a steadfast spirit within me. Psalms 51:10
Farmgirl sister #1156
www.KKJD1.etsy.com
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FebruaryViolet
True Blue Farmgirl
4810 Posts
Jonni
Elsmere
Kentucky
USA
4810 Posts |
Posted - Jul 13 2012 : 12:26:26 PM
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I hope you continue to be blessed with such a fair minded mother in law. There is nothing better than having an "extended" family--I have 2, actually. My husband's parents divorced, then remarried other people and my mother in law and my step-mother in law became best friends. It's great!
You'll need all the support you can get starting out as a new married couple and learning about each other and how to live together.
"Hey, I've got nothing to do today but smile..."
The Only Living Boy in New York, Paul Simon |
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clothedinscarlet
True Blue Farmgirl
1333 Posts
Siobhan
Battle Creek
MI
USA
1333 Posts |
Posted - Jul 13 2012 : 7:13:51 PM
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So wonderful that you are getting a great MIL! Just remember to always have grace and remember that she adores you. Sometimes even the best mother in law can over step a line that she doesn't even realize she's crossing. No one is perfect and moms are created to help. Sometimes they don't quite realize when its time to let the babies fly the nest without help anymore.
And I've found that extra grace is needed in the years that she's going through "the change". Often that happens around the same time her children are getting married and she has little control over the person she can appear to be. Grace. Always grace.
Farmgirl Sister #1110
Siobhan - AKA Liza-Jane (my farmgirl name), wife to my best friend, Trent, and mommy to Camden (11/28/05) and Bennett (7/11/07). and Truman (7/28/09) |
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Fiddlehead Farm
True Blue Farmgirl
4562 Posts
Diane
Waupaca
WI
USA
4562 Posts |
Posted - Jul 14 2012 : 07:44:19 AM
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Cherish her!
http://studiodiphotosite.shutterfly.com/
farmgirl sister #922
I am trying to be the person my dogs think I am.
I get up every morning determined to both change the world and have one hell of a good time. Sometimes this makes planning my day difficult.
- E. B. White |
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fiddlegirl89
True Blue Farmgirl
232 Posts
Kayla
Dunnville
KY
USA
232 Posts |
Posted - Jul 14 2012 : 08:01:11 AM
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Thanks for the feedback, everyone! I do cherish her...I'd been worried for years about the MIL issue...I have an aunt who lives with her's, and the stuff that went on there was just awful (although I happen to know half the problem there was/is the DIL!) I'm so glad my situation is different!
I look up to her so much, and it's quite intimidating sometimes. The first time I went to a get-together at their house, she ran sack races a month and a half after having a c-section. She's had ten c-sections...they say she's unable to give birth naturally. She nursed the baby while walking around visiting! She's mid-forties now.
Once a few months ago, Jacob and I were talking about her ability to host large parties easily and I made a remark about how I was intimidated about that, because I assumed that's what he was expecting from me and I'm just not like that, at least not yet. Some folks who know me have said that in a couple years I'll be just as comfortable doing that as anything...but I don't know! Anyway, I was telling Jake how I was feeling about it, and he said "why do you have to be like her? You don't have to do everything she does and be exactly like her!" Whew. :) So, while I do have the utmost respect for everything she does, it's nice to know he realizes I'm not her. I'm glad I'm not expected to fill her shoes when it comes to some things! I do look forward to learning from her, though!
www.crazykcreates.blogspot.com
www.crazykcreates1.etsy.com
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prayin granny
True Blue Farmgirl
1874 Posts
Linda
Kansas
1874 Posts |
Posted - Jul 14 2012 : 7:20:26 PM
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Such a blessing! Enjoy !
Hugs,
Linda |
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farmmilkmama
True Blue Farmgirl
2027 Posts
Amy
Central MN
USA
2027 Posts |
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LuckyMommyof5
True Blue Farmgirl
500 Posts
Suzanne
OH
USA
500 Posts |
Posted - Jul 17 2012 : 05:09:01 AM
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I'm really glad for you, Kayla. What an awesome family you are joining!
Farmgirl Sister #3243
"The real things haven't changed. It is still best to be honest and truthful; to make the most of what we have; to be happy with simple pleasures; and have courage when things go wrong." - Laura Ingalls Wilder |
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delicia
True Blue Farmgirl
917 Posts
delicia
cincinnati
ohio
USA
917 Posts |
Posted - Jul 17 2012 : 4:39:35 PM
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| I think you are getting back what you put out. She sounds like a treasure and just knows what a treasure you are in return. Of course the fact that you are both from KY makes you both extra special. |
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Family Matters: Future Mother-in-law |
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Future Mother-in-law
