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Across the Fence:  How do YOU make friends?  |
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graciegreeneyes
True Blue Farmgirl
3107 Posts
Amy Grace
Rosalia
WA
USA
3107 Posts |
 Posted - Mar 21 2010 : 3:52:21 PM
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Oh my goodness - I could have written the last two posts - I am shy and always feel awkward talking to people unless I have a "reason" like kids, work, etc. I feel silly introducing myself to people who have been acquaintances for a while. Kimberly Ann - like you I think I come off aloof or something. One close friend I had years ago told me I was hard to get to know, which is weird because I feel like I put everything right out there on the table. Anyway - I'm lucky because there is a fellow MJF farmgirl right in my little town.
I know the church setting used to be fruitful for making friends because people were working for a common cause - we seem to have lost that feeling in society in general. This forum definitely provides that for me but you still need the face to face interaction.
Good luck to you both:)
Amy Grace
Farmgirl #224
"use it up, wear it out, make it do, or do without"
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SuzieQ
True Blue Farmgirl
175 Posts
Suzie
Texas
USA
175 Posts |
Posted - Mar 21 2010 : 4:00:51 PM
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| When we moved to north Dallas. I met some people in church. I also checked at the bookstores, churches, and city library to see if there were any knitting groups that meet. I found two and they are free and some of the women have taught me stitches that I did not know. That helped me alot. Check out the quilt, knitting, and craft stores to any groups that meet. Also don't forget the senior citizen center there are always groups with them. |
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solilly
True Blue Farmgirl
726 Posts
Lillian
Williamsburg
Virginia
USA
726 Posts |
Posted - Mar 21 2010 : 5:58:39 PM
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I am so glad it is working out for you Elizabeth. Life is to short and there are to many things to do and learn to let shyness be in your way. I was shy as a school kid. At the end of high school I told my self the difference between me and the popular girls was I hid they stayed up front. So I said what is the worst thing that can happen to you so people may laugh just laugh back. Start talking about things you like, or would like and people open up. I am 56 right now and my dh says can we ever go anywhere where you do not know someone. I talk to people every where I go. It is great. Love ya Lilly 
learning the life I always wanted. |
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MotherLodeBeth
True Blue Farmgirl
110 Posts
Beth
Calaveras County
California
USA
110 Posts |
Posted - Mar 21 2010 : 7:19:33 PM
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Moving to a rural area can be hard. Spring and summer seem to be the best time to connect with new neighbors. If they have a mail box, send them a nice note saying hello and who you are. This way they can call or stop by if they feel comfortable. Also connect with people via the local feed store, 4 H groups, library, and other country related places. Read the local newspaper and volunteer for special causes in the community. If there is a notice of a special cause to raise money for a local family, go. ~Beth~
~I am the best of France and California~ |
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barnagainkristin
True Blue Farmgirl
465 Posts
Kristin
Utah
USA
465 Posts |
Posted - Mar 21 2010 : 7:43:47 PM
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Elizabeth,
So happy you are now finding friendship where you live. I live in an area where people are very invovlved in church and if you don't go you are pretty much left out. I do have a few friends which that doesn't matter to, but for the most part my daughters and husband are my very best friends. I think that's why I love farmgirls so much. Wish we lived closer and could have a cup of tea together and talk farmgirl stuff.
One of my favorite neighbors is an older gentleman who wears overalls, walks everyday, and is about 6'5" tall. He has helped us find our lost pony, runaway peacock, and anything else we have needed. Last fall he walked up and down the road with his wheel barrel full of homegrown carrots and delivered every neighbor a bunch of fresh carrots. He is the one person I know in my area who is friends with everyone around. If you plant a garden you may want to try planting something your neighbors may not have and delivering like our good neighbor did. It still brings a smile to my face when I think of him walking down the sidewalk pushing all those carrots.
I tend to enjoy the company of my animals and when I feel lonely nature always makes me feel better. You just can't be lonely in a grove of ancient pines.
Best Wishes in finding even more friends. I think the idea of having the older women teach you things is wonderful. Glad you have farmgirl friends no matter what!
barnagainkristin
"Others Before Self" |
Edited by - barnagainkristin on Mar 21 2010 7:50:13 PM |
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prairie_princess
True Blue Farmgirl
613 Posts
Elizabeth
Carpenter
WY
USA
613 Posts |
Posted - Mar 22 2010 : 6:45:11 PM
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Beth, that's a cute idea to deliver a nice little hello note to the neighbors in their mailbox... maybe invite them over for afternoon tea? :)
Kristin, I LOVE the story of your neighbor delivering his carrots... such a nice, neighborly thing to do! Yes, nature does offer a lot of company.... But there's just nothing like a good girl's day to put you right! my DH is also my best friend and all my other women best friends live somewhere else. But to do something in person with someone is truly special... there can be no comparison at times to sit down with someone face to face and share a special moment. But pen pals and online farmgirls are the next best thing! :)
"Only two things that money can't buy, that's true love and homegrown tomatoes."
- Guy Clark
"The man who has planted a garden feels he has done something for the good of the world."
- Charles Dudley Warner |
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birdie71
True Blue Farmgirl
254 Posts
Robin
Glendale
Arizona
USA
254 Posts |
Posted - Mar 25 2010 : 2:08:00 PM
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Elizabeth,
I'm sorry that you feeling this way! I do have to say that there is a lot of fantastic advice here! AND I feel like I know a lot of the girls here only because of first, through my mom's connection and then through the latest shower of love I got from a bunch of the girls here. I'm sure that this is an avenue of building relationships!
I do know that it is difficult to have your closest girlfriends far away...my mom lives in Colorado! We do talk, text, email constantly!
My husband is a triathlete and is part of a club! I go to several events with him and have made several friends that way...course this club he's in is well connected group! It is a family of it's own accord!
I also have a handful of close friends through church! We are part of a group of couples who have blended families! This is also a very well connected group...LOTS of grace and understanding! We text, call, email, meet, and pray for each other!
My work as a teacher has also lended itself to a connection with other teachers. I currently work at a very small charter school and it is very family oriented! We are also very connected! A lot of this is probably surviving together!
I would suggest finding those places/activities that interest you...and see what comes about as you go and do!
Hang in there girl! I will be praying for you!
Robin
Teacher looking for water in the Sonoran Desert |
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krissy
True Blue Farmgirl
278 Posts
Kristen
Snohomish
WA
USA
278 Posts |
Posted - Mar 25 2010 : 3:38:37 PM
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Wow, this is a thread I could have started as well. It seems a lot of us have trouble meeting new people and making friends. I, too, tend to be on the shy side and usually am not the one to start a conversation with a stranger.
I am lucky to be part of a church that has a lot of people I enjoy and I actually am thinking about having some of the girls over. You see, all my friends that I have known for a long time have all moved away. I am always around my own family - never have friends over and that's pathetic! Time to branch out of my little house/world and have some girl time. Living in a house with three guys (hubby and boys) gets a little old...
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~Farmgirl Sister #986~
http://lateinlifemommy.blogspot.com/
http://www.youravon.com/kristenparkinson |
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prairie_princess
True Blue Farmgirl
613 Posts
Elizabeth
Carpenter
WY
USA
613 Posts |
Posted - Mar 26 2010 : 10:29:22 AM
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Robin, thank you so much for your well-wishes and prayers! This forum is an excellent source to build relationships... I think we could write self-help books with all the wonderful advice women share on here! SO many great ideas!
Kristen, maybe we should form a "shy farmgirls" club on here... It is a shame some of us are shy. I don't really consider it a flaw, really. Everyone is different in their own way. But sometimes we do miss out on certain things. I think it is a quality to be meek at times... we are more mysterious that way! And I agree, we do need girl time! Guys just can't meet all of our womanly needs.
Now, an update on my status... So, I went to visit a local lady in my small town to chit chat about starting a homemaking/craft club for the local ladies. I was very surprised to discover how many grudges people are holding! How many enemies people make! It is such a shame to me that we live in this small town of 100 people and the townspeople don't have any interest in getting together as a community because of grudges and small piddly things of that nature. Most of this town is made up of retirees, but I guess more younger generations are moving in. I'd hate to think some of the older generations' last years might be spent staying at home and not being a part of the town because of these things! I'd like to get to know them, they should be passing on their advice to us! Getting us involved in the town, how to take care of it and be proud of it... I feel a bit let down by all of it. But it's also motivating me to want to do more! So that's a good thing....
"Only two things that money can't buy, that's true love and homegrown tomatoes."
- Guy Clark
"The man who has planted a garden feels he has done something for the good of the world."
- Charles Dudley Warner |
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Across the Fence: How do YOU make friends? |
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How do YOU make friends?
