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Across the Fence:  Will you wonder why you struggled so much...  |
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goneriding
True Blue Farmgirl
1599 Posts
Winona
Central Oregon
USA
1599 Posts |
 Posted - Jul 19 2008 : 08:29:43 AM
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at the end of your life?? (I heard this subject on an Oprah radio ad). When you take your dying breath, will you wonder??
That caused me to sit back and think about how my life is going... The people in it or out of it, will it matter at the end??
I'm middle aged now and I want to enjoy the remaining years. I think back to my younger days and how I made things so hard for myself and if I had known then what I know now, I would have done things so much differently.
My ex-MIL once told me (she was in her '80's) that she wished she'd taken more chances and I took that to heart. But I still wished I had taken more and been braver about shaking things up but I didn't and paid a heavy price. (Like divorcing her son...lots sooner).
I don't mean this post in a morbid sense to get anyone down but this intrigues me for some reason.
Winona 
When you lose, don't lose the lesson!!
http://goneriding.wordpress.com/
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CabinCreek-Kentucky
True Blue Farmgirl
8529 Posts
Frannie
Green County
Kentucky
USA
8529 Posts |
Posted - Jul 19 2008 : 09:11:48 AM
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winona .. i have spent most of my life 'going within' .. and truly do not look back (at even the lean or saddest years) as a struggle. (i surely did sometimes when i was in the 'throes' of them though!!!)
i once read a wonderful book of interviews of people who had reached their 100th birthday. the question was asked of each of them ... if you could change ONE thing about your life .. what would it be? by far .. the majority said "i wouldn't have WORRIED so much" .. most of what i feared never happened and what i wasn't expecting snuck around the corner while i was focused on worry.
some went on to talk about lost opportunities, grudges held, hope lost, chances not taken. and absolutely every one of them said it was such a WASTE of their precious time here on earth!
i also once read a wonderful little experiment to do for ourselves. WRITE YOUR OWN EPITHET .. what would your gravestone say if it were written by those who have passed through your lives? what would YOU want it to say .. how would YOU want to be remembered?
go ahead gurlz .. WRITE IT!!! then look at it with eyes wide open .. is that WHAT will be said of you? if not .. do you want to do something about it so that you WILL be remembered with love, respect and fondness? I believe this extends to those 'angels unawares' that walk beside us for just awhile too.
i love the belief (ha! not sure i'm TOTALLY convinced of it yet) . but still, i love the belief that: THERE ARE NO ACCIDENTS IN LIFE (i was most recently reminded of this in KUNG FU PANDA!!!) when hardships (or jus' plan 'ole CRAP) seems to be in our lives .. it truly is an opportunity to either 'learn' at the time (or in retrospect) .. and see how all that helped us grow ..
NOW .. i do believe this ONLY happens when we have a kind and 'open' heart. i think if we get 'stuck' in negative stuff .. our life truths are hidden .. oh .. they are there .. waiting for us down one of our life paths .. we just have to WALK (or run, skip and jump) down that path though in order to find the lesson and learn from it.
when i was about 50 .. i also found another great little 'experiment' to do ... you take a sheet of paper and write BIRTH on the left hand side .. draw a horizontal line across the paper and write DEATH on the right hand side of the page.
now put an age .. a NUMBER beside that 'death' word. this number is based on a 'guesstimate' of about how long you actually might realistically live (barring unforeseen 'accidents' .. hmmmmmm .. or is it an accident???) THAT's another whole discussion!
anyhoo ... look at your family history and how long your parents and siblings, aunts and uncles lived .. look at their lifestyles .. and then take a VERY close look at your own lifestyles and health.
NOW .. write that number down!
NEXT .. figure out on that 'line' about where you are now .. and add up your 'remaining' years!
And this is where we 'learn' about ourselves .. our hopes, dreams, priorities, stumbling blocks, etc. etc. etc.
and we can decide to choose what IS and what IS NOT truly important to us. What we have not yet done that we truly want to do .. and THEN .. we get down to figuring out how to accomplish those goals in our lives!
This does not mean that we have to 'order' every moment of our lives .. but it opens up to us .. the stuff that we trooooooooooooly do not want .. and the "memories we will take with us" when we leave this earth. (now THAT was from the film MEET JOE BLACK .. "death" was visiting a hospital and an elderly lady who was in much pain wanted him to take her to the other side. She smiled sweetly and said she had enough memories to carry with her .. and wanted to travel that road now.
OH .. and also from KUNG FU PANDA .. remember that "yesterday is history .. tomorrow is a mystery .. TODAY is the PRESENT .. and that's why the 'present' is called a GIFT!" I like to remember yesterday, LIVE today and look forward to tomorrow.
oh my! you've got me 'waxing poetic' here .. but i do love deep and meaningful talks with my gurlfrenz. xo, frannie
True Friends * Frannie
adopt a 'rag-chile'
http://sistermercysfoundlinhome.blogspot.com
treasures .. new and olde .. http://mudpiemanormercantile.blogspot.com
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Edited by - CabinCreek-Kentucky on Jul 19 2008 09:19:09 AM |
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Patsy
True Blue Farmgirl
592 Posts
Illinois
USA
592 Posts |
Posted - Jul 19 2008 : 09:19:53 AM
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I will probably regret the fact that I haven't helped more people than I have. And I will have hoped that I would have learned the lessons on earth I was put here to learn. But I know Jesus will accept me no matter what.
May God bless those who love the soil,
Patsy
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catscharm74
True Blue Farmgirl
4687 Posts
Heather
Texas
USA
4687 Posts |
Posted - Jul 19 2008 : 09:50:42 AM
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I agree not to worry so much about little things and things that won't even matter next week. I used to be the always pleasing and never say no kinda gal, always considering someone else's feelings or thoughts or what I knew what was best for me. The first time I put my foot down and refused to be run over, I got called a...well...you can imagine. I truly believe in shooting for the stars and if I am a good person in my heart, living my life my way is not going to hold me back for fear of hurting someone else. Walking with true intentions is important to me but not waiting for life to pass me by before trying something. I guess watching Charlie grow so fast and knowing his Daddy is missing so much, no matter how many pics and videos I take, is making me realize to breathe each day.
Heather
Yee-Haw, I am a cowgirl!!!
FARMGIRL #90 |
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catscharm74
True Blue Farmgirl
4687 Posts
Heather
Texas
USA
4687 Posts |
Posted - Jul 19 2008 : 09:56:47 AM
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I hit send before I was ready....
Hubby left his whole life behind in Mass. to come to Texas when he was 22, packed up his truck and left and didn't even know where he was going. We have very similiar stories. Somedays I don't know how we are going to make it or what our future holds, but I am at peace with my heart and myself, and that is the most important. If I worried, especially as it pertains to how my family perceives me or how I live, I swear, I would die young from struggling and trying to be something I am not.
I learned from my Papa that you have got to live and love each day in your own way...
Heather
Yee-Haw, I am a cowgirl!!!
FARMGIRL #90 |
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Across the Fence: Will you wonder why you struggled so much... |
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Will you wonder why you struggled so much...
