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Parenting & Farm Kids:  Am I being mean?  |
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Sitnalta
True Blue Farmgirl
4208 Posts
Jessica
NJ
USA
4208 Posts |
 Posted - May 26 2008 : 4:22:59 PM
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Heres the story...
My daughter is going to be three in September and she isn't potty trained yet. I also have a 14 month old. I think she is ready to train. I mean, well, I know she is; but ladies..I AM TIRED!! With both the children constantly on the go the last thing on my mind right now is worrying about whether my girl is potty trained or not. Sometimes, I feel really guilty about it. Am I going to scar her for life? Is this a bad thing? Should she be potty trained at a certain time? Anyone else out there have un-pottier?
hugs
Jess
When life sends storms, remember to dance in the rain!
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catscharm74
True Blue Farmgirl
4687 Posts
Heather
Texas
USA
4687 Posts |
Posted - May 26 2008 : 4:36:44 PM
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Charlie just turned 2 and shows no interest in potty training other than watching Mama and laughing. : O
I am a "single" parent right now while hubby is deployed and potty training is the last thing on my mind unless Charlie REALLY shows an interest. I have nieces who potty trained at 2 and a nephew at almost 4, no matter how hard they tried.
Heather
Yee-Haw, I am a cowgirl!!!
FARMGIRL #90 |
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ddmashayekhi
True Blue Farmgirl
4739 Posts
Dawn
Naperville
Illinois
USA
4739 Posts |
Posted - May 26 2008 : 4:55:41 PM
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I have 3 sons that all trained a different ages. The oldest was 2 years 9 months, the middle at age 2 and the youngest at 3.5 years. Each boy made it clear when he was ready. I learned with my oldest that pushing it on him didn't work at all.
You can do things to prepare both girls now by having them sit on the toilet when they get dressed. This helps them get comfortable with the toilet and it won't be so scary when they do begin training. They may even indicate they want to "go" when they are in there. Take your time, every child is different, there is no "certain time" age for a child to be toilet trained. Good luck!
Dawn in IL |
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kissmekate
True Blue Farmgirl
890 Posts
Kate
Delano
Minnesota
890 Posts |
Posted - May 26 2008 : 5:43:08 PM
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Both of my kids were late "bloomers" on the potty department. One of which I had to bribe with tap shoes before she would finally "get" it. (I tried everything with her!!!)
The boy went to his Dad's house one weekend and came home trained. Wouldn't even touch a diaper after that. (Diapers are for Babies MOM!) Duhhhh. How could I not know that. LOL
They both will train when they are ready.
Don't miss out on a blessing, just because it isn't packaged the way you expected. ~MaryJo Copeland |
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graciegreeneyes
True Blue Farmgirl
3107 Posts
Amy Grace
Rosalia
WA
USA
3107 Posts |
Posted - May 26 2008 : 5:50:09 PM
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My son was late too - about 3 and 1/2 when he did it for real and of course I was worried about it. My godmother - who had had three kids - told me not to worry, he would for sure be trained by the time he went to college |
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kindacrunchymom
True Blue Farmgirl
94 Posts
Diane
In the thumb
Michigan
94 Posts |
Posted - May 26 2008 : 5:50:26 PM
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Olivia just finished potty training about a week after her 3rd birthday. One day, she refused to wear a dipe to bed and she was dry the next morning. The next day she told me that she was all done.
This was after a year of cajoling, bribing, clapping, etc.
I found out from a pediatrician friend that a big part of potty training (especially at night) is hormone related. Until they release enough of a certain hormone, they will have a very hard time with it, and not be dry at night unless you do major behavioral intervention.
She'll do it when she's ready!
Farmmom to my 3 year old farm tot, and wife to a country boy!
To learn more about me, here is my blog:
http://mcadmom.wordpress.com/
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mima
True Blue Farmgirl
1573 Posts
1573 Posts |
Posted - May 26 2008 : 5:53:22 PM
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I wouldn't worry!!!!I have always heard that kids don't take diapers in their lunch box to kindergarten! They'll do it when they are ready! I don't know any adults who aren't potty trained.....
"No pessimist ever discovered the secrets of the stars,or sailed to an uncharted land or opened a new heaven to the human spirit." Helen Keller
http://www.thebodyshopathome.com/web/dcole1 |
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GaiasRose
True Blue Farmgirl
2552 Posts
Tasha-Rose
St. Paul
Minnesota
2552 Posts |
Posted - May 26 2008 : 7:00:53 PM
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don't fret it. my girls are different in their learning too. Grace trained herself by 18 months and Zoe waited until she was just over 2....she is 2 1/2 now, so not that long ago, though accidents still happen from time to time, she never has an overnight potty accident or a traveling accident. Just make a kid potty available and read potty books to her and she'll take care of it as ready!
~*~Brightest Blessings~*~
Tasha-Rose
Farmgirl Sister #88
Blogs:
http://frugalwitch.wordpress.com/
http://youtube.com/profile?user=GaiasRose
Homepage:
http://ForestFaeries.etsy.com
"Joyful chaos, working in tune with the seasons, telling itme by the sun, variety, change and self-direction; all this wwas replaced with a brutal, standardized work culture, the effects of which we are still suffering from today." - Tom Hodgkinson in 'How To Be Idle' |
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MarySueK
True Blue Farmgirl
96 Posts
Susan
Richland
WA
96 Posts |
Posted - May 26 2008 : 9:11:48 PM
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| I have a niece whose Mom wanted her potty trained so she could send her to preschool. My niece screamed "NO POTTY NEVER" whenever the topic was raised. Of course she grew up and now has her own baby. My mother in law had a method for training a kid over a weekend. You let them run around with no pants on and let them drink as much lemonade or whatever they wanted, with the little potties nearby. As soon as they looked like they might want to go, you hustle them to the potty. She claims it works pretty well. Now that the weather is warm you might try it? (My oldest kid I had to bribe with a Little Tykes ride-in van!) |
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22shortie
True Blue Farmgirl
329 Posts
rebekah
sulphur
la
USA
329 Posts |
Posted - May 27 2008 : 07:28:17 AM
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I was determined to start potty training my daughter as soon as she turned one. I was extremely deticated to being consistent and put her on the potty every two hours for months and months and months. She had the right idea but continued to wet and dirty her diaper also. She will be two in July and just in the past couple of weeks has she started comming to me and TELLING me when she has to go and is having less accidents. My lessons learned was, no matter how much I pushed the issue and did all the "right" things, she just wasn't ready until SHE was ready. i would say encourage your kiddos to keep giving it a try but don't push them into anything until they let you know they are ready.
Fresh and creative projects popping up on my blog daily! Stop by and check out what I'm up to today!
http://pumpkinseed-unscripted.blogspot.com/ |
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chellybelly
True Blue Farmgirl
65 Posts
Michelle
Knoxville
TN
USA
65 Posts |
Posted - May 27 2008 : 08:55:34 AM
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I agree that you can't make a child train until they are ready. However, I think there are ways to encourage them. My daughter was pretty much trained by 2, but she is the kind of child that decides she wants to do something and just does it. We let her run around naked for most of the summer (she had turned 2 in March) and she NEVER had an accident on the floor). My son, on the other hand would have peed on every piece of furniture we own if he had gone nakey. He just didn't see the point of stopping what he was doing to go potty when he could just go right there in his diaper. He also didn't like being naked. About 2 months before his 3rd birthday I had had enough of diaper changes. He showed all the signs of being ready, but just wasn't 'into' using the potty. (He was dry all night and could use the potty but was choosing not to.) So, we had a Big Boy Potty Party. We invited a few friends and had cupcakes. He recieved training pants and undies as gifts and then we 'gave' all his diapers to a friend's little girl. I think it was sort of a rite of passage for him. He really responded well to this and was completely potty trained soon after. The hardest part was for me to not buy more diapers. I just had to trust that he was indeed ready. (I also let him start peeing on a bush out back, so that might have been a motivater as well!)
~Michelle
Michelle
Farmgirl Sister #203 |
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La Patite Ferme
True Blue Farmgirl
623 Posts
Jenn
CA
USA
623 Posts |
Posted - May 27 2008 : 08:58:38 AM
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I pretty much let nature take its course. I can't even remember when it happened. But, one day DD tried to climb up on the potty, so I took her shopping and let her pick out HER potty. I set it up right next to the big potty with a little stack of books. Over the next few months it was hit and miss when she used it. Then one day she started using it all the time and asking to go potty when we were out. I still had her in diapers at night and during naps, but other than that we never had an accident. Did the same thing when we switched from diapers to panties. Worked like a charm and she's never wet her bed.
I'm sure it's hard with two, but I think we should take our cues from the kids. They show signs of being ready.
I know some might think I'm nuts and of course I only have one, but I watched a friend of mine force the issue too too soon and it turned out badly. She use to make her kids run around with nothing on but mud boots. So everytime they went it would run down their leg and into the boot. She said if it gets yucky enough they will use the potty. I told her I thought it was abusive and mean.
I don't know what she accomplished - she may have had 4 trained by two, but she also had 4 that wet the bed until their early teens. Personally, I'd rather change diapers until age 2 or 3 than wash 4 sets of bed linens EVERY night. |
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mommatracy
True Blue Farmgirl
490 Posts
Tracy
My. Olive
NC
USA
490 Posts |
Posted - May 27 2008 : 09:23:54 AM
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Our oldest daughter Meredith was almost 3yrs old before she potty trained. We tried everything and she still would not cooperate. We also had another 1yr.old baby daughter in diapers. Cloth diapers. Meredith started noticing that her cousins wore "big girl" underwear and she wanted some. I made a deal with her. I went out and bought several pairs of cute little girl underpants with flowers and little cartoon characters on them. I told her when she started using the potty seat and stopped messing up her diaper she could start wearing "big girl" panties. In just a few days she was wearing her little flowery panties and so proud of herself! I think she was 2months shy of her 3rd birthday. Our younger daughter liked to copy everything her big sister did so at 18months she was potty trained with hardly any effort on my part. She would actually pick up a pair of Meredith's little paties and say "me-me-me" and push away the diaper.
www.cottagebythebay.blogspot.com |
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Jeanna
True Blue Farmgirl
267 Posts
Jeanna
Franklin
NC
USA
267 Posts |
Posted - May 27 2008 : 11:03:57 AM
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If they were headed for kindergarten I might be worried. Let them be kids and they will let you know when they are ready.
Jeanna
Farmgirl Sister #41
If both of our troubles were hung on a line--You would take yours and I would take mine. |
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kissmekate
True Blue Farmgirl
890 Posts
Kate
Delano
Minnesota
890 Posts |
Posted - May 27 2008 : 2:28:49 PM
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I tried the "pull ups" at first with Lauren, and they weren't much difference than a diaper IMHO. I thought it was harder to get the poopy ones off her without a huge mess and lots of gagging, so we switched to straight panties.
I tried them at night too, and used them for about week. She was dry every night, so chucked them all together.
I made her wear her panties all of the time during the day. If she wet/messed herself, it wasn't very comfortable. My ex MIL was my daycare, and she was very supportive on that.
That tactic and the tap shoes sealing the deal, made her make up her mind in a hurry to start using the potty all of the time.
(This was after a few weeks of messing with me, I swear. It was a control issue! )
And now we argue about why it is inappropriate for her to wear eyeliner at her tender age. *sigh* It goes fast.
Don't force it, you will only frustrate yourself and most importantly the kid, who will resist it even further. I have yet to meet a kid starting kindergarten who wasn't potty trained.
Don't miss out on a blessing, just because it isn't packaged the way you expected. ~MaryJo Copeland |
Edited by - kissmekate on May 27 2008 2:46:53 PM |
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okieinalaska
Farmgirl in Training
11 Posts
Amy
Eagle River
Alaska
USA
11 Posts |
Posted - May 31 2008 : 08:58:58 AM
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Luckily Grandma came to visit at just the right time for both kids and was able to help me. (and she lives in OK, we are in Alaska)
No advice, just hang in there. : )
Amy |
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sugarwood_naturals
Farmgirl in Training
24 Posts
Jackie
Wister
Oklahoma
USA
24 Posts |
Posted - May 31 2008 : 6:34:59 PM
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My pediatrician told me that kids will potty when they are ready. As long as they are aware what the toilet is for, most will let you know when it's time. Good luck and don't feel guilty.
Good Old Fashioned Lye Soap
http://www.sugarwoodnaturals.com
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Parenting & Farm Kids: Am I being mean? |
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Am I being mean?
