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Family Matters:  Pretty down right now...a vent...my family...  |
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goneriding
True Blue Farmgirl
1599 Posts
Winona
Central Oregon
USA
1599 Posts |
 Posted - Feb 27 2008 : 5:05:32 PM
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Again...
It seems my daughter who was widowed last year is/has pushing/ed me away again. She is avoiding my calls but my grandson answered the phone today but she wouldn't talk to me. I don't know why again.
My other daughter moved in with her about a month ago and since then, we have had some words about the way she was treating me. It seems to me that as long as I was sending her money, all was well. Some other things happened and I'm beginning to see how my daughter has played me like a fiddle. Even my hubby says he has thought this for the longest time but didn't say anything.
I'm so down about this...I defended my daughter to my hubby for the longest time and now it seems he was right. I told him to go ahead and make fun of me, he was right. Wisely, he stayed quiet cuz he knows I'm on a pity pot for the time being.
Why is family so hard to deal with?? I grew up without a family and wanted one so badly all my life and I guess I have tried too hard and overlooked things that I should have dealt with.
I'm just very sad right now...thanks for listening/reading.
Winona
When you lose, don't lose the lesson!!
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emsmommy5
True Blue Farmgirl
1547 Posts
Angie
Buckley
WA
USA
1547 Posts |
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mikesgirl
True Blue Farmgirl
3659 Posts
Sherri
Elma
WA
USA
3659 Posts |
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Bluewrenn
True Blue Farmgirl
1122 Posts
Erin
Texas
USA
1122 Posts |
Posted - Feb 28 2008 : 11:10:46 PM
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Sometimes it seems like you have to accept family for who they are - with all their faults. I wasted years trying to help out my sister and it did not one iota of good. She never learned from her mistakes, and she never even thanked me for my help - neither emotionally or financial. And her situation is even worse than it has ever been.
I stopped talking to her for awhile because it helped me break that cycle of helping (or wanting to help) and then being disappointed in her when it did no good, and while we have only recently begun talking again, I no longer feel compelled to help her out or to invest great deals of my time and energy worrying about how she's living her life.
Maybe it's time to let your daughter deal with her issues on her own. Give her time and she'll probably bounce back your way.
My Homesteading Journal http://toomyvara.livejournal.com
My craft journal http://bluewrenn.livejournal.com
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Edited by - Bluewrenn on Feb 28 2008 11:11:15 PM |
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Lainey
True Blue Farmgirl
2401 Posts
Elaine
Waco
Kentucky
USA
2401 Posts |
Posted - Feb 29 2008 : 07:15:15 AM
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Winona, sorry to hear things haven't been going well. I hope everything gets better soon for you all. I'll keep you in my prayers.
(((Hug)))
Farmgirl Sister #25
http://countrygirldreams.blogspot.com/ |
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goneriding
True Blue Farmgirl
1599 Posts
Winona
Central Oregon
USA
1599 Posts |
Posted - Mar 14 2008 : 8:08:57 PM
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Well, things have looked up quite a bit. I talked to my daughter and she didn't even realize how long it had been since we had talked and isn't upset with me at all. I feel a bit sheepish but told her that after our other experience of her pushing me away, I kind of panicked and thought it was happening all over again.
My other daughter who was totally rude to me now is singing a different song when she talks on the phone to me. Very nice but I'm not ready to let her hurt me again. I'm being a bit stand-offish cuz I'm not taking the chance she's playing games again.
Family stuff is just difficult but I guess we're muddling thru...
Winona :-)
When you lose, don't lose the lesson!!
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Alee
True Blue Farmgirl
22941 Posts
Alee
Worland
Wy
USA
22941 Posts |
Posted - Mar 14 2008 : 8:24:55 PM
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I'm glad to hear that things are looking so positive Winona!
Alee
Farmgirl Sister #8
Please come visit Nora and me on our new blog:
www.farmgirlalee.blogspot.com |
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farminmama
True Blue Farmgirl
63 Posts
Jen
Florida
USA
63 Posts |
Posted - Mar 15 2008 : 08:50:37 AM
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Winona,
(((hugs to you)))
All you can do is love them. I'm not sure why family sometimes feels like it doesn't matter how they treat us. All I can figure is they know we'll always be around. So even though it hurts, they know you'll be there. If you're still feeling stand-offish, offer yourself, a listening ear, a shoulder to cry on, but let them know that that is all you have to give. I hope all work out the way your heart desires.
Jen
sweetheart to Harley
mama to 3 beautiful angels...^i^ ^i^ ^i^
farmgirl Sister #151 |
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italianchildhood
True Blue Farmgirl
172 Posts
172 Posts |
Posted - Apr 16 2008 : 04:04:28 AM
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It's always the people we love and that we are closest to that we are most comfortable hurting, it's so odd.
Glad it's much better.
All you can do is do the best you can, treat them right, and then really they have to find it in themselves I think to reciprocate.
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And my latest amusement: http://foundmuseum.blogspot.com |
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Family Matters: Pretty down right now...a vent...my family... |
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Pretty down right now...a vent...my family...
