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Across the Fence:  For all Moms  |
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mkmomus
True Blue Farmgirl
248 Posts
Merle
Greensboro
NC
248 Posts |
 Posted - Sep 04 2007 : 3:45:47 PM
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My friend sent me this and so I send to all of you.
Invisible Mothers
It all began to make sense, the blank stares, the lack of response, the way one of the kids will walk into the room while I'm on the phone and ask to be taken to the store. Inside I'm thinking,
"Can't you see I'm on the phone?" Obviously not. No one can see if I'm on the phone, or cooking, or sweeping the floor, or even standing on my head in the corner, because no one can see me at all. I'm
invisible.
Some days I am only a pair of hands, nothing more: Can you fix this? Can you tie this? Can you open this? Some days I'm not a pair of hands; I'm not even a human being. I'm a clock to ask, "What time is it?" I'm a satellite guide to answer, "What number is the Disney Channel?" I'm a car to order, "Right around 5:30, please."
I was certain that these were the hands that once held books and the eyes that studied history and the mind that graduated magna cum laude - but now they had disappeared into the peanut butter,
never to be seen again. She's going, she's going, she's gone!
One night, a group of us were having dinner, celebrating the return of a friend from England. Janice had just gotten back from a fabulous trip, and she was going on and on about the hotel she
stayed in. I was sitting there, looking around at the others all put together so well. It was hard not to compare and feel sorry for myself as I looked down at my out-of-style dress; it was the only
thing I could find that was clean. My unwashed hair was pulled up in a pony tail, and I was afraid I could actually smell peanut butter in it. I was feeling pretty pathetic, when Janice turned to me with
a beautifully wrapped package, and said, "I brought you this." It was a book on the great cathedrals of Europe. I wasn't exactly sure why she'd given it to me until I read her inscription: "To Charlotte,
with admiration for the greatness of what you are building when no one sees."
In the days ahead I would read--no, devour--the book. And I would discover what would become for me, four life-changing truths, after which I could pattern my work: No one can say who built the great cathedrals--we have no record of their names. These builders gave their whole lives for a work they would never see finished. They made great sacrifices and expected no credit. The passion of
their building was fueled by their faith that the eyes of God saw everything.
A legendary story in the book told of a rich man who came to visit the cathedral while it was being built, and he saw a workman carving a tiny bird on the inside of a beam. He was puzzled and asked the man, "Why are you spending so much time carving that bird into a beam that will be covered by the roof? No one will ever see it." And the workman replied, "Because God sees."
I closed the book, feeling the missing piece fall into place. It was almost as if I heard God whispering to me, "I see you, Charlotte. I see the sacrifices you make every day, even when no one around
you does. No act of kindness you've done, no sequin you've sewn on, no cupcake you've baked, is too small for me to notice and smile over. You are building a great cathedral, but you can't see right now what it will become."
At times, my invisibility feels like an affliction. But it is not a disease that is erasing my life. It is the cure for the disease of my own self-centeredness. It is the antidote to my strong, stubborn pride. I keep the right perspective when I see myself as a great builder. As one of the people who show up at a job that they will never see finished, to work on something that their name will never be on. The writer of the book went so far as to say that no cathedrals could ever be built in our lifetime because there are
so few people willing to sacrifice to that degree.
When I really think about it, I don't want my son to tell the friend he's bringing home from college for Thanksgiving, "My mom gets up at 4 in the morning and bakes homemade pies, and then she hand
bastes a turkey for three hours and presses all the linens for the table." That would mean I'd built a shrine or a monument to myself. I just want him to want to come home. And then, if there is anything
more to say to his friend, to add, "You're gonna love it there."
As mothers, we are building great cathedrals. We cannot be seen if we're doing it right. And one day, it is very possible that the world will marvel, not only at what we have built, but at the
beauty that has been added to the world by the sacrifices of invisible women.
Great Job, MOM |
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Carol Sue
True Blue Farmgirl
4033 Posts
Carol Sue
Washingtonian
USA
4033 Posts |
Posted - Sep 04 2007 : 3:52:58 PM
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Thanks Merle, for sharing that and reminding us.
Carol Sue
Enjoying life. |
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Tammy Claxton
True Blue Farmgirl
1559 Posts
Tammy
Glen Burnie
Maryland
USA
1559 Posts |
Posted - Sep 04 2007 : 3:56:41 PM
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This is so beautiful that it made me cry. It is also so true. Thank you so much for sharing this, I really appreciate it.
What doesn't kill you only makes you stronger! |
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GaiasRose
True Blue Farmgirl
2552 Posts
Tasha-Rose
St. Paul
Minnesota
2552 Posts |
Posted - Sep 04 2007 : 4:08:40 PM
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Thanks for sharing that. I was just feeling defeat the other day when the girls destroyed every bit of clean up effort I made, or when grace changed her clothes fifteen times on laundry day and threw everything BACK INTO THE DIRTY PILE! GRRRRR. I sobbed when Rob got home because I felt so defeated. thanks for that. It was nice to read.
~*~Brightest Blessings~*~
Tasha-Rose
Blogs: http://gaiarose.wordpress.com
http://womonandsprout.wordpress.com
Homepage:
http://ForestFaeries.etsy.com
Birth is safe, interference is risky; TRUST BIRTH |
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wallflower
True Blue Farmgirl
101 Posts
Holly
East Walpole
MA
USA
101 Posts |
Posted - Sep 04 2007 : 5:03:45 PM
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Thank you for sharing. . .sometimes it helps just knowing that you are not the only one feeling invisible, and that our job is so important!
http://handittoholly.blogspot.com |
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DaltonLisa
Farmgirl in Training
14 Posts
Lisa
Dalton Gardens
Idaho
USA
14 Posts |
Posted - Sep 04 2007 : 8:52:15 PM
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| Thank you so much for posting that Merle-their way with words is a gift and that quote in the book is one to post for daily viewing. I often feel that way--that it could be ANYONE driving them around, making the dinner, sewing the clothes.....and they wouldn't notice. Here's a toast to all you dedicated, beautiful moms! |
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Shirlaroo
True Blue Farmgirl
297 Posts
Shirley
Australia
297 Posts |
Posted - Sep 05 2007 : 12:19:07 AM
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Thank you Merle, you have made my day.
Friends are the best collectables. |
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Kelly43
True Blue Farmgirl
349 Posts
NJ
USA
349 Posts |
Posted - Sep 05 2007 : 6:45:59 PM
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Thank you Merle, from the bottom of my heart. I really needed that today. Not only am I missing my kids (both away at the moment) but I have the kind of job out of the house where I feel invisible most of the time. This certianly gives me a better perspective of everything.
I am proud of all you moms out there, you amaze me!!!
Kelly |
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lisamarie508
True Blue Farmgirl
2648 Posts
Lisa
Idaho City
ID
USA
2648 Posts |
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mkmomus
True Blue Farmgirl
248 Posts
Merle
Greensboro
NC
248 Posts |
Posted - Sep 06 2007 : 07:22:21 AM
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Lisa,
Someone sent it to me and I copied it and posted here. I didn't see anything about a copyright so I think it is OK. Thanks for asking.
Merle |
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carycamille
True Blue Farmgirl
163 Posts
Camille
Cathlamet
Washington
USA
163 Posts |
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Across the Fence: For all Moms |
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For all Moms
