| T O P I C R E V I E W |
| therusticcottage |
Posted - Aug 02 2005 : 3:12:24 PM
I've seen others ask about time management and this topic has been on my mind for a couple of weeks now. I know that as Farmgirls we all have lots to do just to keep things running smoothly. Throw hubby, kids, and animals into that mix -- and a full-time job for some -- and things can get out of control very fast.
I just never seem to be able to get everything done that I want to do in a day. Sometimes I feel like I just drift throught the day not accomplishing anything. I either let the house go so that I can work on sewing or other projects or the projects and house go by the wayside while I work outside. Then there are the days I don't get anything done because it's my day to go into town to shop. Today I went to help Steve's grandma and didn't get home until 2:30.
Please share your daily schedule or time management tips. Also, Aunt Jenny mentioned chore charts for her kids. I need help with that for my one kid. HELP!
Kay - Living in Beautiful Washington State
"You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face."
--Eleanor Roosevelt |
| 25 L A T E S T R E P L I E S (Newest First) |
| Fabulous Farm Femmes |
Posted - Aug 13 2005 : 12:42:11 AM
P.S. MY granchildren don't drool.................anymore |
| Fabulous Farm Femmes |
Posted - Aug 13 2005 : 12:40:15 AM
Little Feather, I'll tell you how she did it with 2 babies a year apart....she moved back in WITH ME!!!
Her NO good now ex-husband left her in Phoenix (long story), alone with the 3 kids and we had to go get her, and move her back up here with us, she was a mess...3 kids in 4 years.But that baby was meant to be in our family, as my daughter was breast feeding, had a Depo- Provera shot, AND was using a spermicide!!
I am glad to report though she has a wonderful new man in her life, a great job, and has lost and kept off over 100 lbs (not counting the 200 lbs of good riddance when she got rid of the Ex...LOL)And yes, she is funny and sarcastic and a doll like all my girls. We are blessed in them...now if we could just make the REST of our family sane... |
| Clare |
Posted - Aug 12 2005 : 09:05:19 AM
The very principles of Feng Shui, Rebecca! Good advise. I too try to practice this regularly.
**** Love is the great work - though every heart is first an apprentice. - Hafiz
Set a high value on spontaneous kindness. - Samuel Johnson****
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| rebecca |
Posted - Aug 12 2005 : 08:50:24 AM
Hi Girls,
Here's something that works for me. I have an area in my basement where I collect things to pass along to the Goodwill store. When I have a few things collected, I take them with me on my next trip. I figure I am always bringing things into my home, so if I want to keep some "free space" around me, I need to take things out at just about the same pace. You won't believe what a gift open space can be in your home. Choose carefully the things you surround yourself with. Let them have meaning or purpose. Get rid of all the stuff that you are tired of, don't need, or don't want anymore. I'm telling you it can make a difference in how you feel every day.
Rebecca of RebeccaJoysFarm |
| littlehippiechick |
Posted - Aug 12 2005 : 08:38:53 AM
OOOOOO Ouch! 1 year apart, that sounds scary! I don't know how she does it! To tell you the truth, I'm not sure how women used to do it 100 years ago with 13 kids! Went to a local museum in a neighboring small town, and it was filled with household items and stories from that time. When I left there, I was pretty ashamed of complaining about anything!
This one couple I met breifly had 2 kids 9.5 months apart. I thought that was impossible, she was breastfeeding and all. That's nuts!
How is your daughter holding up with having two kids so close? Does she have a sarcastic humor too?!?
No man is ever worth crying over, and the one that is...won't make you cry!!! |
| Fabulous Farm Femmes |
Posted - Aug 11 2005 : 11:06:43 PM
Little Hippie chick, glad I could be entertaining! It's my true mission in life, in a wierd family like mine sarcasm is our only relief..Glad you found MJF... welcome welcome! I had 2 little girls about that far apart and you sound like you have figured out what's important a LOT sooner than I did, God Bless you.They DO grow up so fast! I think my daughter has you beat though..I have 2 grandaughter born exactly 1 year apart to the day! |
| littlehippiechick |
Posted - Aug 10 2005 : 10:20:59 PM
Fabulous Farm Femmes...you just made me pee my pants!!! LOL
No man is ever worth crying over, and the one that is...won't make you cry!!! |
| littlehippiechick |
Posted - Aug 10 2005 : 10:18:53 PM
Heheheh, Whimsy_girl. A drool-fest would be hillarious! Yes it is too bad that we don't live close, by reading your postings, we have alot in common. But I guess that's why were all on here...we all have something in common! What a wonderful forum...
Little hippie chick!
No man is ever worth crying over, and the one that is...won't make you cry!!! |
| Whimsy_girl |
Posted - Aug 10 2005 : 10:05:08 PM
Little Hippie chick, Your kids are about the same age as mine! Too bad you don't live closer. We could have a playgroup to let the little ones drool on eachother and the big ones have tantrums together :)
you can be oh so smart, or you can be oh so positive. I wasted a lot of time being smart I prefer being positive. |
| littlehippiechick |
Posted - Aug 10 2005 : 9:52:26 PM
Man, do I ever love this forum I just discovered this forum in search for new ideas on natural cleaning products, money saving ideas, and just to connect to other women who are doing the most important role that could ever be done for their children! I left the city with my husband, left my excellent career, and we headed to the farm to raise our two beautiful girls who are now 21 months and 6 months! We wanted to give our children a better lifestyle than what we could provide in the city, and we changed our lifestyles completely...I'm now a full time homemaker and my husband left his good paying-always gone career, and chose a less paying job close to home, but he is home everyday for supper which is important! We're not rich when we look at the bank account, and we struggle to make ends meet, but our souls are so incredibly rich, because our paychecks don't come with a dollar sign or digits...they come with hugs and kisses.
When it comes to time management, what I've been learning slowly is that it is impossible to do 48 hours of work in a 24 hour period, so you pick and choose house chores that need to get done. As long as the kids are clean, happy, fed and played with...and food is not rotting, it is fine. Some days I seem to have everything all together and manage to get soooooo much done, and other days I'm so scatterbrained, that nothing gets done! I'm also a neat freak and a perfectionist, but I just have to learn to throw that mentality right out the freakin door! I also work from home and most times only get 3 hours of sleep so I can get some work done in the evenings. The extra money that I do make, seems to be spent on the extra coffee I need to stay awake and play and keep up with chores. I always thought that being the perfect mother and wife meant having perfect kids, a perfect house, and a perfect image...well I've litterally gone and drove myself insane. Well I'm not perfect, and my husband told me today that he fell in love with my imperfections, and that's what made me perfect!
Anyway, in my spare time, I like to write my thoughts about what I am learning about motherhood, and I thought of sharing them with you all, to remind all of us and myself how important our roles as mothers is! Hope you enjoy!
-The best way a man can support his children, is to support the mother!
- Why do we dream of travelling to far off places that will always be there, when a child's mind can take us places we've never dreamed of...and will only be around for such a short time!
- EXCITING JOB OPPORTUNITY! No experience necessary, but must be able to perform on demand with or without appropriate training. Some tasks performed by the successful imcumbent includes; washing, cleaning, cooking, teaching, accounting, entertaining, purchasing, etc. Must be willing to work long hours, on call, and on weekends. Must be dependable with excellent communication skills. Must be willing to travel. Ability to be physically active is preferred. Salary is priceless and bonuses include hugs, kisses and smiles. This is a long term position for the remainder of your life. All applicants quote "motherhood" when applying.
Well I should get going, I've babbled long enough! But I hope to chat with some of you soon, and I hope that together, sharing ideas can help us all to feel good about what we do...and what we are not able to accomplish in a day! You all take care!
Little hippie chick!
No man is ever worth crying over, and the one that is...won't make you cry!!! |
| greyghost |
Posted - Aug 09 2005 : 5:23:45 PM
My mother swears by FlyLady and had me try it out, but I have to admit I absolutely hated it! All those emails telling me to clean my sink - nag, nag, nag!!! I hated the visual clutter in my email box! My sink is usually clean anyway, my hubby creates the "hotspots" if he gets the mail & I just run along behind him on his days off, putting things away. HE may need flylady, but I don't!
I rarely seem to have the time to work on projects like sewing but I realized it's a hang-up I need to get over. It isn't that I don't have the time. I work from home but my work gets heavily concentrated for about two weeks a month and then I am practically free for the other two weeks. My husband, however, still works full time. And I feel guilty if I spend a day happily sewing away while he is working.
It's a mental problem I just can't seem to get around, even though I work 18-20 hour days on those two busy weeks! |
| julia hayes |
Posted - Aug 08 2005 : 9:53:54 PM
This particular notion caught my attention. 'time management' 'the conveniences of daily life' 'there's never enough time'..I was considering these cliches while bent over my washing machine today and I was struck with an epiphany. Our work as homemakers truly never ends. The laundry never really gets completely done. Sure we may finish the last load but there's the end of the day's clothes and that dish rag that didn't make it into the load etc.. our work is continuous, often thankless and unrecognized, sometimes boring and mundane and yet I wouldn't trade my job for one outside my home. I've decided to change the saying
"If only I could get all my work done so could sit down and relax"
to something a little more forgiving and reflective of how we ought to "manage" our days
"If only I could relax and get some work done!"
We live in a muddled, hurried, complicated, overscheduled and incredibly inconvenient society/culture. We talk about simplifying our lives as if its a goal one strives to achieve instead of a reality one simply incorporates. Here's to descheduling our schedules...Here's to pausing in the moment..Here's to breathing deeply knowing that life is a short-lived gift!
How do I manage my day? one moment at a time and anything that gets done work, fun or otherwise is a success!
Blessings, Julia
being simple to simply be |
| Whimsy_girl |
Posted - Aug 08 2005 : 5:13:28 PM
Oh how sad! I've been taking advantage of the fact that the girls have been entertaining eachother all day long.. and I've managed to waste the whole day looking stuff up online and posting here instead of doing anything around the house... someone else had mentioned how addictive this site is and how she keeps getting sucked in.. I don't recall who that was but I totally agree with them!! With no one needing my attention today my butt is starting to take the shape of my computer chair..
I'll leave and then think of something else I forgot to look up or ask and I keep coming back!
you can be oh so smart, or you can be oh so positive. I wasted a lot of time being smart I prefer being positive. |
| Kathigene |
Posted - Aug 06 2005 : 10:49:56 AM
One thing that I'm thinking of doing that I haven't gotten to yet is setting up my shredder on a shelf in the garage near the door into the house. I'm trying to stop the "enemy" paper from entering the house!! I'm wondering if that would be a good place to put a file cabinent for paid bills. And I'm never sure how long to keep anything. Lots of things I never even see the actual bills any more. I look them up on line after I am notified that the bill is there for viewing. So the paper bills - how long do I need to keep them? Can I scan them and toss the paper? I've actually decided that I only need one month to make sure it acknowledges that last months payment was recieved but that's still kind of giving me a scare. But with my current paper unmanagement I probably couldn't find mail I recieved last week unless it's still in the van.
One warning though is to never leave the shredder plugged in if it's one of those auto feed models and most of them are now. Curious fingers and silly dogs and kitties might find it and set it off. And you know I might not want to share my house with mice but I don't want to find one in my shreder. ICK! Why did I think of that?
So the battle continues but I still can't say how much all the support and joy felt in the messages on these forums has helped me in the last few weeks. I feel arms of fellow sisters patting me on the back telling me I will get it done! Thank you all!
Kathy in New York
Dogs make such good friends because they wag their tails rather then their tongues. |
| therusticcottage |
Posted - Aug 06 2005 : 08:12:04 AM
I just joined the FlyLady website and am working on getting organized. Just keeping my sink shining and picking up the living room before bed has helped immensely. It's nice to get up in the AM to a completely empty sink and neat living room. Now if I could just get my daughter to pick up her room!?! Yesterday I took 5 minutes to tackle the edge of the counter where I tend to pile papers. That is totally cleaned off and everything put away. I think in terms of the whole picture instead of breaking it down into bites then I get overwhelmed. These little steps have made me feel so much better. Plus I'm getting moving earlier instead of sitting around drinking coffee in the AM.
And I've decided that I'm going to save the big sewing and stitching projects for when I'm cooped up inside after the rains start. I'm going to be outside playing in my yard and enjoying the sunshine as long as I can.
I totally agree about online billpay. We've paid our bills that way for over 4 years and love it. It saves so much time for me.
Kay - Living in Beautiful Washington State
"You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face."
--Eleanor Roosevelt |
| Kathigene |
Posted - Aug 06 2005 : 07:11:52 AM
Hi every one! One piece of the puzzle that has saved me hours and will eventually probably save me from ruin is on line bill pay. Three years ago I was having really dumb things like getting the cable and phone shut off because I hadn't gotten around to sending the payments. It wasn't a case of not having the money, it was a case of not having the time or the discipline to sit down and write the checks.
Now every single bill that can automatically come out of my checking account does. I admit that the way I get paid really helps. I'm paid on the last working day of the month and on the 15th of the month. So I always know when there will be money in the bank. If you're paid on every other Friday that complicates things a little more but I still think the overall convience is worth it.
A few of the bills I have to actually go on line and initiate the payment so I have to make sure I remember and if I had it to do over again I would have made them automatic. And I have a total of three annual bills left where I have to write checks. Dues to the dog club I belong to, the snow removal contract, and the auto club. This not only saves me tons of time but is slowly healing my credit score which was in tatters just because I was always late with everything.
Do I worry about on line fraud? Yes but in my opinion, what I've gained from doing things this way FAR out weights any increased chances I might be taking and actually I've read recently that more fraud starts with info gotten from your paper trash on the curb then from anything on the internet. And I no longer go into a panic every time the lights flicker that I might be months behind on my utility bill and I don't lay awake at night worrying that I haven't paid this or that. It has been a huge relief!!
It doesn't cost me a cent to do this through the bank I use and I would shop around and look for a bank where it doesn't cost you anything but remember you're saving on stamps, checks and the precious thing that you can never get back Time.
Kathy in New York
Dogs make such good friends because they wag their tails rather then their tongues. |
| prairiesun |
Posted - Aug 04 2005 : 10:11:17 PM
It's great to know I am not the only one running around like CRAZY! I don't even have pets, kids or a yard and I feel like there needs to be 8 more hours everyday just so I can sleep! As I am sure many of you also feel the same way, but I have soooooo many interests and still have to manage to pay bills and do daily chores. I am often reminded of a great quote 'The hurrieder I go, the behinder I get', so don't forget stop and enjoy the journey once in a while. The worst part about having not enough free time is not being able to 'chat' as much as I would like. There is such a great supply of knowledge, humor and inspiration from all of you. Here's to another busy day... |
| quiltedess |
Posted - Aug 04 2005 : 5:08:03 PM
Kathigene:
You are very wise. You have got a "system" that works and you don't give up even if you've gotten off track for a bit. Your words were inspiring. If you can do it with such disabilities, I can certainly do it with my healthy body.
Nancy |
| Fabulous Farm Femmes |
Posted - Aug 04 2005 : 12:56:29 PM
Soap Maven Susan- sorry I made you spit coffee-hope it didn't stain anything good.Well, really, Tom Cruise at this point knows about as much about reality as Osama Ben Laden knows about Catholicism. Give me a break. Yeah, if you can hire any kind of help in the world you want..housecleaning, cooking,drivers therapists, nannies..well then one might have time to try vitamins and exercise. But the rest of the world trying to keep meals on the table, bills paid and keep a smail on our face when we are so depressed we want to take a dirt nap, well that plan just doesn't work too darn well.It's like Madonna feeding the chickens in her designer gown..great idea if you can afford 10 more designer gowns when that one gets ruined with chicken poop. If I wore my nice dress to feed the chickens, more than likely I'd be going to church with chicken poop on me. |
| Kathigene |
Posted - Aug 04 2005 : 08:10:41 AM
I really belong in this forum. I'm recently out on permantent disability and although I do things slowly I thought having the whole day to myself would mean that I would start to see progress made in my house but I was amazed at how many days zoomed right by with nothing done.
Of course, my life is complicated by a number of health problems. I have mixed connective tissue disease. Basically that means that my body is trying to kill itself. It's a rare auto immune disease. The major symptoms are joint pain and mind numbing fatigue. But what I learned early on was that even if I worked for 10 minutes and rested for 20, as long as I kept going I could get get quite a bit done.
I've had this disease for 20 years or more and now I have a bunch of stuff going on in my back and last year they discovered a herniated disk in my neck. I had surgery for the neck - not because of any pain because I wasn't having any but because I could no longer walk in a straight line and I was getting so weak that stepping up on a curb was a challenge. I had hoped that walking more normally would alleviate the pain from my back. Nope!! Oh well so finally I decided I couldn't put myself through this any more and I took the advice of my doctors and left my job.
I'm also depressed! (I feel the same way about Tom Cruise. What the heck does he know!!) I lost my mom about 10 years ago and it was like my reason for living disappeared. I had taken care of her for half of my life. I was 42 years old and I had left college when I was 20 or 21 to come home and take care of her. Yes, I had a full time job, and trained my dogs but every waking moment really was focused on keeping Mom comfortable and alive. She had lung and heart disease from smoking. But eventually I got on with life! Started dating a little -Try that in your late 40's. Got more active in the dog training. Got laid off from my job of 20 years but got a new one right away. And a better one I might add.
Then two years ago my oldest sister died. She was only 15 years younger then my mom and twenty years older then me. Suddenly Mom was gone again and along with my sister all the family history went with her. I have one sister left but she also has lung cancer and has already outlived what they thought she would. And she doesn't talk about her childhood. If I have a specific question, she might know the answer but she doesn't really care about that stuff the way my mom and oldest sister did. Suddenly I'm the only was who does, and I don't remember as much as I should.
I also begain to realize that the last 5 or 6 years I've been living like a kid with ADD. I don't have any problem focusing but I think that with the challenges of the new job, deteriorating health, the new difficult commute that came with the new job, I had nothing left for home. So when I got home everything just landed where it landed and stayed there forever!!
So what have I been doing to get myself out of this mess!! My first life saver is a Palm Pilot or what ever suits your life like it. I tried all the paper planners and they are just too big for me to carry around with me. I bought the cheapest one on the market a few years ago and for the first time in years I didn't lose phone numbers and miss appointments. I had it about 4 years and then I went to a dog show in Buffalo NY in January and I killed it leaving it in the car!! Bad bad owner!! Well I thought I could get along with out it. That was a mistake!! I was losing numbers and I missed appointments. So I gave up and bought a new one. Yes the initial investiment is high but it is the only thing that keeps me on track!! I try to be religious about syncing the computer and handheld which is one of the things that is important to do. And if you treat it well it will last a long time and you don't need one with bells and whistles you need the most basic model out there.
The second thing that I found helped me is to make a rolling to do list. I tried doing this in the computer software that came with the palm pilot but I might not open it and then gets covered up by that fun game or that interesting article and I forget it's there. The to do list is in a honking big thick date book I got on sale. I use various glittery colored pens in it and it sits where I see it almost all the time. I can't forget it because it's sitting right there looking at me but it's pretty and glittery and colorful so it doesn't annoy me it just reminds me. And especially if you are really stuck put down stuff you love to do or know you are going to do so you have the pleasure of marking it off. And reward yourself!!
I try to keep a "to buy" list but I'm not very successful with that since I never seem to bring it with me, however once I write it down I seem to be much more apt to remember it so just writing it down does help. I may try a post it note type thing with my big old date book.
I've just started a craft project list hopefully so I won't just pick up what's at hand but do what I really want to do next and also so that when yarn or craft paint is on sale I can look in my list and say oh yes I need 3 bottles of colonial blue etc. Or that I don't buy duplicates. I'm also going to start a house projects list with the same type of things in it. That's going to be awfully long!!
I sound like I know what I'm doing but my problem is staying on track. If I look in my date book I used it on 3-29 and then on 5-10 and then again starting this month. But I know that when I was using it every day in January, I got a lot done. So I know it can work for me.
I hope you guys have managed to make it through this long message. I feel so at home here. I carry MaryJane's book around and keep handing it to people to look at. And I think I might just buy a bunch of them and give them to everyone on my Christmas list, in the hopes they will remember what is important in life.
Kathy in New York
Dogs make such good friends because they wag their tails rather then their tongues. |
| TheSoapMaven |
Posted - Aug 04 2005 : 05:28:47 AM
Fabulous Farm Femmes you made me spit coffee!!! Yeah...that Tom Cruise is an expert, I'd say. NOT!!! Anyway. I keep a notebook. Lists and lists...list that carry over. Actually going to buy a new one today. The old one is filled to over filled! I am in a state of disorganization at the moment and it is making me crazy. Our (home)school starts here Sept 5 and I am working on lesson plans. I have picked up two possibly three new wholesale soap accounts so I am working on that and am really blessed to see orders in my mailbox everyday. Plus with autumn approaching, I have an open house to plan!! Any suggestions on that would be much appreciated.
Somehow the most important things get done. Gardening is slowing for now...we will plant fall garden first of Sept. My mom is doing really well right now, thankfully. So all is good in this 'hood. Busy as bees but SO blessed.
Blessings & Bliss!.· ´¨¨)) -:¦:-
¸.·´ .·´¨¨))
((¸¸.·´ .·´ -:¦:-~Susan~
-:¦:- ((¸¸.·´*
Wife, Mother, Natural Woman, Savonnière, Writer, Baker, Gardener.
Wife to Jerry for 27+ years
Mom to Zach, Gesikah, Nathan, Hannah, Rachel and Benjamin
Yetta to Sam
Proprietress of Dahlem's Soapworks
http://www.thesoapmaven.com
"It's no bad thing to celebrate a simple life" ~ Bilbo Baggins
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| Fabulous Farm Femmes |
Posted - Aug 03 2005 : 11:06:23 PM
Whimsey Girl, didn't think you were whining...we ALL remember what it was like when the kids were little...I got a year and a half long reminder when my suddenly single mom daughter moved in with a 3 and 1/2 year old, a one year old and a 3 month old.They were here for over a year, a long hard year, but we just rolled with the punches this time. The house was a wreck most of the time, but I wouldn't trade it for anything. Sometimes God gives you a second chance.
My Grandma used to remind me "This too shall pass".And it does, faster than you will ever think once they are grown..hang in there! |
| Whimsy_girl |
Posted - Aug 03 2005 : 10:52:01 PM
You are very right about that Fab Farm Femmes, I didn't intend to sound like I was complaining about my kidlets, but rereading my post does indeed look that way. I try to spend as much time with them as I can, thats why I reserve my cleaning times to their naptime. It's just hard to do the garden and the house in that amount of time... I suppose I COULD be cleaning now, but after 10:00 at night, if I'm going to short myself on sleep to do anything it's going to be doing something I enjoy :)
I Really liked that little poem from above, I printed it out to put on my fridge!
you can be oh so smart, or you can be oh so positive. I wasted a lot of time being smart I prefer being positive. James Stewart in the movie HARVEY |
| Fabulous Farm Femmes |
Posted - Aug 03 2005 : 10:37:56 PM
AMEN! |
| little feather |
Posted - Aug 03 2005 : 10:59:19 AM
Fabulous Farm Femmes:
Reading your post reminded me of one of one of my favorite poems. It's posted on my frig just so my Husband and I never forget- never take for granted. I hope y'all like is as much!
If I Had My Child to Raise Over Again
By: Diane Loomans
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If I had my child to raise all over again,
I'd finger-paint more and point the finger less.
I'd do less correcting and more connecting.
I'd take my eyes off my watch, and watch with my eyes.
I would care to know less and know to care more.
I'd take more hikes and fly more kites.
I'd stop playing serious, and seriously play.
I'd run through more fields and gaze at more stars.
I'd do more hugging and less tugging.
I would be firm less often, and affirm much more.
I'd build self-esteem first, and the house later.
I'd teach less about the love of power,
and more about the power of love.
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