| T O P I C R E V I E W |
| Ladybek9756 |
Posted - Dec 21 2013 : 2:31:43 PM
September 1, 2014.
We shall be off the grid starting tomorrow. Keep us in your prayers for safe keeping in the Lord's arms.
Becky
August 23, 2014.
Well Paul's sisters have finally convinced his father to through us out of the house we have been renting for the past 4 years. No money, we are on the street and they don't care. At least we have 3 weeks to make the move. I will be getting a PO Box on Monday. Hopefully with what little money we have managed to save we can find a cheap trailer to buy and put it on a lot until we can get on our feet. Pray that all works out for us please.
Becky
This is a very tough time for me and has been for the last five years. I married Paul five years ago this December. Paul is a wonderful husband and my problems does not lie with him but his family. We dated two and half years before we married. After seven and half years you would think that things would be different.
Before I go into the problem let me give you a little background information about me. I am not sure if this is the reason, I can only guess though. They only know that I was abandoned by my mother at the age of 5 and lived in the welfare system from then on. The truth be told my mother did not want me because of the sexual abuse I suffered at the hands of her boyfriend at the time whom later became her husband. I lived in over 18 foster homes before at the age of 14 going to live in the orphanage. I don’t know why so many homes, I can only guess. Who I am today is because of those times. I was never in one place long enough to develop any type of personality from those people. I instead took the values I felt were honorable and rejected those I didn’t. So in my eyes I am who I am because of what I believe in not influenced by anyone else. Now I don’t consider myself anything special, but I do consider myself a good person nonetheless. I hold honor and integrity in the highest esteem and have always tried to live my life according.
Now the problem. Paul’s sisters and his father have rejected me the whole time I have been married to Paul. Mostly his sisters in the beginning and now his father. They still to this day reject our marriage and have told Paul that if he wants back in the family he must divorce me first. This has been really hard on him as these people are his family. I have been there to pick him up after each rejection and he still held on to a belief that they would change. In the beginning of our marriage I sent birthday/anniversary and Christmas cards for two years. After that I closed the door to their existence. To me enough was enough. That is when Paul and I started to have problems but it only lasted about a year. He finally saw them as I did and realize that there was nothing he could do. Besides he loved me and did not want our marriage to end. Now his father rejected our existence when they were around and we were even told that while they were visiting to stay away. We were only allowed to come around when no one else was around. To me this was okay, I can give you some time as I have no one else here. This did not set well with me and I closed the door (so to speak) on the lot of them. I told Paul for the sake of our marriage to keep his family out of it. He did and we were okay. It still hurt but I did all that I could not to let him see that.
This year I felt from the Lord to open my heart and my home to heal the wounds of this family. I did. I sent an invitation to everyone expressing this desire. They as a slap in the face, told Paul and Paul alone that they would not come. I don’t know what I have done to them, since I have only been in their company 3 times over the last 7 ½ years and have not really spoke to them as they wouldn’t even give me the time of day. My heart is broken and what I don’t understand is WHY? I feel crushed today and for the first time the tears are falling and believe me I am not one to cry. I avoid that action at all costs. In my 7 years of knowing Paul this is only the 2nd time he has ever seen me cry and this is the first time I was not able to gain control of the tears.
Please pray for Paul as this is so hard for him. And pray for me to find my happiness back.
Thanks for letting me open my heart and cry on your shoulders, for I truly do not have anyone else.
Becky
May the stars carry your sadness away. May the flowers fill your heart with beauty, and may hope forever wipe away your tears. |
| 25 L A T E S T R E P L I E S (Newest First) |
| nndairy |
Posted - Jan 19 2015 : 07:34:30 AM
How wonderful to hear from you Becky! I have been praying for you and wondering how things have been going. Glad to hear you're doing well.
Hugs,
~Heather
Farmgirl Sister #4701
September 2014 Farmgirl of the Month
http://nndairy.blogspot.com/
"The purpose of life is to enjoy every moment" - Yogi teabag
|
| Calicogirl |
Posted - Jan 16 2015 : 11:31:10 PM
Oh Becky, it is so nice to hear from you. You and Paul have been in my prayers and I have often wondered how you were faring. Continued prayers for you! I am sending a pm, I would love your address.
Farmgirl Sister #5392
By His Grace, For His Glory
~Sharon
http://amerryheartjournal.blogspot.com/
|
| Beverley |
Posted - Jan 12 2015 : 6:12:48 PM
So glad to hear from you!!! Glad you are doing well. I opened this and read it while I am watching "tiny house". So, anyone can do it. Glad you sound happy. It must have been hard in between and I will still keep praying for you.!!
Folks will know how large your soul is by the way you treat a dog....Charles F. Doran
beverley baggett
Beverley with an extra E...
https://sites.google.com/site/bevsdoggies/
http://bevsdoggies.blogspot.com/ |
| Ladybek9756 |
Posted - Jan 12 2015 : 5:54:28 PM
Good evening ladies.
I just wanted to let everyone know that I am alive and doing okay. We just purchased a travel trailer and are living in that. We found a reasonable place to park it and are starting to get back on our feet. I want to thank everyone for their continued prayers and if anyone wants my address let me know. I also want to let the farmgirls who sent me cards, that I finally received them and am so thankful for your thoughtfulness of me at this time. I will be in touch on this site more often now.
Blessings.
Becky
May the stars carry your sadness away. May the flowers fill your heart with beauty, and may hope forever wipe away your tears. |
| marjean |
Posted - Sep 08 2014 : 12:11:03 PM
Becky,
I hope you are doing better. Are you still in Florida? I'm sorry to hear you have had such a rough life. My Mother went through some ups and downs similar to yours. Her faith has gotten her through every moment of hardship the last 72 years.
I will pray you find peace and comfort in God's word.
This is one of my favorite scriptures that has helped me get through my own hardships these past 51 years.
Praised be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ,+ the Father of tender mercies+ and the God of all comfort,+ 4 who comforts* us in all our trials*+ so that we may be able to comfort others+ in any sort of trial* with the comfort that we receive from God.+ 5 For just as the sufferings for the Christ abound in us,+ so the comfort we receive through the Christ also abounds.
Any time you want to read the bible together send me an email.
Hugs and Agape,
Marsha
Farmgirl sister #308
Cooling Neck Wraps
www.marketsofsunshinefl.etsy.com
http://jeanpatch.blogspot.com
Vendor Marketing Swag Bags
www.marketsofsunshine.com |
| Beverley |
Posted - Aug 26 2014 : 6:20:35 PM
Oh becky you are so lucky to have the husband you have that stands by your side. my first marriage ended because my husband would not take my side and tell his family to back off. So pray for them but maybe this move will really be a blessing in disguise, I agree with winnie, go and ask at the salvation army and other charities. they are out there to help,all you have to do is ask!!
Folks will know how large your soul is by the way you treat a dog....Charles F. Doran
beverley baggett
Beverley with an extra E...
https://sites.google.com/site/bevsdoggies/
http://bevsdoggies.blogspot.com/ |
| Red Tractor Girl |
Posted - Aug 25 2014 : 4:38:05 PM
Becky, this is all so sad and hurtful to you and Paul. I will keep you in my prayers for some sort of quick solution for basic affordable lodging. Have you tried talking with Catholic Charities locally?Perhaps they might have some places to look into or be able to help you qualify for low income housing in your area as well. My other idea would be to see if there are any opportunities to live in a room in exchange for work like cooking or maintenance. A local Salvation Army may also be a good place to call about finding affordable lodging. They usually have services for homeless and others of great need, including meals and access to food pantries. I hope you both find some answers soon!
Winnie #3109
Red Tractor Girl
Farm Sister of the Year 2014 |
| churunga |
Posted - Aug 25 2014 : 3:22:10 PM
Oh, Becky. I just wish I had room at my place for you and your husband. We would gladly be your family and our families would welcome you also. Now is the time to find a new family. I don't actually know how to do that but give it a try. You both need to be around people who accept you for who you are -- loving and caring people. I wonder what kind of test of faith God intends by all this. Maybe the lesson is for them and not you.
Marie, Sister #5142
Farmgirl of the Month May 2014
Try everything once and the fun things twice. |
| nndairy |
Posted - Aug 25 2014 : 09:54:09 AM
Oh Becky! Big hug girl. I'm praying for you and Paul. Only the Lord can work miracles. I pray he works one for you.
Heather
Farmgirl Sister #4701
http://nndairy.blogspot.com/
|
| Calicogirl |
Posted - Aug 25 2014 : 07:52:41 AM
Gosh Becky, I am so sorry! I am praying that the Lord would heal and restore this relationship and bring you and Paul peace, strength and comfort. I am also praying for the move that the Lord would provide an even better place for a less expensive price. I'm sorry.
Farmgirl Sister #5392
By His Grace, For His Glory
~Sharon
http://amerryheartjournal.blogspot.com/
|
| Ladybek9756 |
Posted - Aug 25 2014 : 07:28:19 AM
Things have gone so downhill and now we are struggling to move, understand why those with so much could destroy those with nothing. Paul and I have done what they requested. We have stayed away, left them alone, not force our presence in family gatherings, pretty much stayed on the outside, paid the rent on time, accepted the rent increase even though it would put a large strain on our resources and yet that was never good enough. They want us out of this house so they could rent it for more money. The first option we faced was living on the street. Our only option next to that is trying to find a very cheap travel trailer to live in. Rent here is very high and we just don't have the funds for it. I have no family and now Paul's have disowned him. We pray each day as we pack our belongings to leave. The deadline is just around the corner and with the stress of that, the start of the new college year with a load that is heavy, I can only pray for peace from God and patience that I will manage to complete it all and still find hope for tomorrow.
Becky
May the stars carry your sadness away. May the flowers fill your heart with beauty, and may hope forever wipe away your tears. |
| Calicogirl |
Posted - Aug 25 2014 : 07:06:36 AM
Still keeping you and your family in prayer Becky!
Farmgirl Sister #5392
By His Grace, For His Glory
~Sharon
http://amerryheartjournal.blogspot.com/
|
| cajungal |
Posted - Aug 25 2014 : 06:37:44 AM
I hope that things have been going better through the past several months since you posted this. Hang in there.
One of the best compliments from one of my daughters: "Moma, you smell good...like dirt." |
| notathreatinsight |
Posted - Aug 25 2014 : 06:32:33 AM
Becky I'm so sorry this is happening to you. I'm praying for you.
Erin
Farmgirl #3762
May my heart be kind, my mind fierce and my spirit brave. - Kate
Forsyth
http://www.etsy.com/shop/femmepostale/
http://www.pinterest.com/femmepostale/ |
| Dapple Grey Lady |
Posted - Aug 24 2014 : 12:19:14 PM
Oh, Becky, I am praying for you. My heart hurts for you. When you get your address let me know!{{{HUGS}}}}
~ Betty ~
Farmgirl Sister # 5589 |
| darlenelovesart |
Posted - Aug 23 2014 : 10:48:49 PM
Praying.
I have learned that to have a good friend is the purest of all God's gifts, for it is a love that has no exchange of payment.
by Frances Farmer
Just follow God unquestioningly.
Because you love Him so, for if you trust His judgment there is nothing you need to know.
I trust in you Jesus... |
| wildflower17 |
Posted - Aug 23 2014 : 4:53:18 PM
Prayers being said for your situation...sometimes life situations can be so difficult...that is when we must leave everything in God's hands and trust Him...I know that is not always easy...but God is always on our side when we trust in Him...
Hugs!
Judy
PLANT SEEDS OF KINDNESS EVERYWHERE YOU GO!!!
Until one has loved an animal, a part of one's soul remains unawakened...
"Country Girl at Heart...Blessed Beyond Measure"!!!
Farm Girl #5440
Farm Girl of The Month September 2013 |
| hudsonsinaf |
Posted - Aug 23 2014 : 3:41:36 PM
Oh Becky!!!!! Praying for you my friend!!!!!
~ Shannon
http://hudson-everydayblessings.blogspot.com/ |
| ptroupe |
Posted - Jan 14 2014 : 4:48:35 PM
Sounds good. Keep it up!
Hugs,
Portia
Wishing for the country life! |
| Ladybek9756 |
Posted - Jan 08 2014 : 4:53:22 PM
Thank you Portia and CJ. Yes I am feeling better. I do have down days, but lately I have no time for them. School is very demanding and I am very thankful for that. I don't expect to get a lot of use from the employment part of the education. I am doing it so that I can go into business for myself. Maybe a teaching job at a community college later in life. But school is very good for me right now.
Farm Girl Hugs
Becky
May the stars carry your sadness away. May the flowers fill your heart with beauty, and may hope forever wipe away your tears. |
| ceejay48 |
Posted - Jan 08 2014 : 4:39:43 PM
Continuing to pray for you Becky!
HUGS!
CJ
..from the barefoot farmgirl in SW Colorado...sister chick #665.
2010 Farmgirl Sister of the Year
Mother Hen: FARMGIRLS SOUTHWEST HENHOUSE
my aprons - http://www.facebook.com/FarmFreshAprons
living life - www.snippetscja.blogspot.com
from my heart - www.fromacelticheart.blogspot.com
from my hubby - www.aspenforge.blogspot.com |
| ptroupe |
Posted - Jan 08 2014 : 4:26:03 PM
Becky, you do sound better. Praise God for that! What a wonderful husband you have in that he stands with his wife. What a shame his mother feels as if she has to bow down to her husband. What a relationship!But, it is wonderful that she loves you and tells you so through her husband. Of course, you mention her age and health, etc., so I realize these play parts in her decisions or no decisions concerning her husband. Keep your chin up and continue in school. You will never regret the schooling. I just retired from education a few years ago. I got my Masters really late and it basically did me no good in so far as getting a principal's position because of my age. But, in the end, I am glad I got it and no one can take it away. Just wish I had gotten it when I was a lot younger, but nothing can be done about that! I know you will make it. I will pray for your husband to get a job as well.
Blessings,
Portia
Wishing for the country life! |
| darlenelovesart |
Posted - Jan 07 2014 : 12:36:04 PM
Becky,
I just read this and I feel sad that there are so many people in the world that take in children for the money only and have no love in them.
My prayers go out to you and I pray that your husbands family come to the realization that you are special and your husband loves you very much and that they want to as well. Bless your mother in law for loving you and may she come up with the strengh to be able to tell her family that she wants to be your friend and mother in law, also I pray that you find help with your finances so that you can be able to afford to move to a place you want to be and be happy there.
Prayers for your husband that he can be strong through this situation and that he will be working at a good job soon and all things work out for you both.
Keep strong and hold your chin up because God is there with you and he will be with you through all of this and show them that you are someone they want to be in their family and are proud to know you.
Good luck with your college work,
blessings
darlene
I have learned that to have a good friend is the purest of all God's gifts, for it is a love that has no exchange of payment.
by Frances Farmer
Just follow God unquestioningly.
Because you love Him so, for if you trust His judgment there is nothing you need to know.
I trust in you Jesus... |
| Ladybek9756 |
Posted - Jan 07 2014 : 11:02:36 AM
Jenny thank you for your kind words. I am sorry that you have the same issue somewhat. I know how you feel and the frustration that it brings. I am keeping my chin up and as of today, I have so much on my plate with college that I don't have the time to think about it. This is a good thing. Besides I know that I have done what God wanted and feel released from the pain and sorrow that trying to get them to accept me brings.
Portia, I was glad to read that you took in children and realize that some of the baggage they bring in is not always their fault. So often I tried to fit in but the homes I was in never wanted me for anything more than a worker for them. I do realize that this hurts my husband more because they have treated his wife this way. He just doesn't understand how they could be so rude to someone they don't even know. He also knows that all I have ever wanted was a family and he is unable to fulfill that dream of mine. That is why pretty much these past five years I have said very little about the pain I feel from rejection. When God asked me to open my heart and home and repair the wombs of this family he was surprised because I have said I wanted nothing to do with them. When they still did not acknowledge that Paul was even married and I would always be excluded from the family and that the only way Paul could ever be a part of his family again was to divorce me, I broke down. It was the first time since my marriage that my husband had seen me cry about anything. The fact that I was unable to reel it back in and stop the tears, he knew that my heart was broken and in him an anger reel up and he was just plain mad. He told his father that no more of this treatment. He was writing his sisters off and they are no longer a part of his family. As to his father, he would never see me and he no longer had a daughter-in-law. He was not going to put his wife through anymore of this. As to moving from this house. Well, Paul is out of work at the moment, this is his fathers house which we pay a small amount for rent and therefore we are really unable to financially move. I have 3 to 3 1/2 years left of school before I am done. We have started making plans not only to move from this house but to move away from Florida as well. In answer to your question are his family Christians, yes they claim to be. I believe with all my heart that the only true Christian in the whole bunch is Paul's mother. But given her age, health and upbringing, she has no voice where anyone listens. It breaks her heart and she misses me and I her. But we both know that this is the choices of the others and we have no say in it. Paul when he visits them always tells her I love her and she tells him to tell me the same. I am busy with college and each day it does get better. The true test will come when the sisters come to visit and then I shall see if I am still okay.
I want to thank everyone for their continued prayers for my family. I feel the love and support from you and it truly does help me to cope with the rejection.
Becky
May the stars carry your sadness away. May the flowers fill your heart with beauty, and may hope forever wipe away your tears. |
| ptroupe |
Posted - Jan 07 2014 : 09:37:45 AM
Becky, I just saw this post and am heart-broken that you have to go through something like this. Tears are streaming as I write this even though I have never had to go through anything like this. My heart goes out to you. Years ago, we had foster children and as you know, they usually come with baggage even though they are not to blame. You seem to have had more than your share. Aside from that, I think you are doing a remarkable job in dealing with these issues. First, you believe in God; second, you have a wonderful husband who loves you and sticks by you (even though it is bound to hurt him that his parents and family are this way---probably eats on him more than you realize), and thirdly, you made a move to end this craziness of theirs. Try to "let go and let God" because you have done everything you know to do. You humbled yourself and asked them into your fold, so the rest is on them. I know this is hard but just try to focus on your husband and finishing your schooling. Is their a possibility that you could move from across the street? I think this adds to everything: it is a BIG reminder of how they feel about you. My prayers are with you, my dear. May God richly bless you and your hubby. By the way, you don't mention whether or not his parents are Christian. If not, this is one reason, I believe. If so, then remember that they need to come to terms as well.
Hugs,
Portia
Wishing for the country life! |
