| T O P I C R E V I E W |
| BusyBeeMary |
Posted - Oct 27 2011 : 8:13:12 PM
After raising 5 kids, my youngest daughter who is 18 almost 19 has decided to unleash unholy terror on my husband and I over the past 6 months with her "bad attitute", foul mouth and lack of respect. We gave her a one month notice to move out. After searching our souls and talking to a therapist... its what we need to do. Its hard, Im grieving... and she was furious that we wouldn't take her verbal abuse or lack of respect anymore. she has a great income, we've never asked for rent and she is capable of taking care of herself financially. I think its just time.... but it still hurts my heart. Now that we've given her notice she hasn't been home in 4 nights... and asked little brother ( 17 ) to help her move her bedroom furniture out...
I have 3 grown children and have never been treated so disresptectful or been talked to in such a manner by any of them like my youngest daughter has. Prayers for her to have discernment and make good choices and prayers for my heart to be healed. Its tough.
To Live a Full life one must LOVE MANY THINGS- Vincent Van Gogh
Mary Fitzpatrick
#3232
http//www.Thepurplecrazylady.blogspot.com
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| 9 L A T E S T R E P L I E S (Newest First) |
| BusyBeeMary |
Posted - Oct 28 2011 : 6:49:37 PM
Thanks again for your prayers and advise. she has a good job and plenty of money to make it so Im not worried about that.... she is coming to finish packing her belongings tonite and take them. she keeps trying to "bait" me into a fight... but Im not having any part of it. Im staying cool as a cucumber.
I know this will all smooth out... but seriously, I need a break!
To Live a Full life one must LOVE MANY THINGS- Vincent Van Gogh
Mary Fitzpatrick
#3232
http//www.Thepurplecrazylady.blogspot.com
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| LuckyMommyof5 |
Posted - Oct 28 2011 : 6:21:12 PM
Mary - I am praying for healing for you and your family and for better days ahead for all of you. I have four very little girls, and my heart hurt just reading of what you are going through. I know that you must be in a tremendous amount of pain right now as a mom and as a family. This has got to be heck to go through, but sometimes a relationship needs space and time to make it good again. Maybe your daughter is going through some "growing pains" and anxieties as a woman just entered into adulthood and she's taking it out on you and your husband. Maybe just what you all need is the boundary that living apart provides and she can once again see both of you for the loving parents you are. She'll come around. In the meantime, hang in there and pray for strength.
Farmgirl Sister #3243
"The real things haven't changed. It is still best to be honest and truthful; to make the most of what we have; to be happy with simple pleasures; and have courage when things go wrong." - Laura Ingalls Wilder |
| FarmDream |
Posted - Oct 28 2011 : 6:03:11 PM
Praying for you Mary. I know several people going through something similar and the kids are the same age. Are they all drinking the same koolaid? I can't offer any better advice than what has already been said.
~FarmDream is Farmgirl Sister #3069
Live Today, Cherish Yesterday, Dream Tomorrow
http://naturaljulie.etsy.com
http://julie-rants.blogspot.com |
| Lieberkim |
Posted - Oct 28 2011 : 08:27:10 AM
Mary, I think you did the right thing. Tough Love has it's place. Although I think it might be harder on the parents...... Praying for you all.
Excuse the mess & the noise, my children are making happy memories |
| BusyBeeMary |
Posted - Oct 28 2011 : 07:40:37 AM
Thanks you ladies... I just had to ask for prayers... its hard on me. My youngest son who is 17 told us last night, You two put up with it a lot longer than I would if she was my kid!!! and that coming from a 17 year old... who has seen it all happen in his home.
I know in the end it will be okay... just getting there is the rough part. Its all the I wish I coulda, I shoulda, etc.s that are going through my mind right now. and the grieving of it all.
Do have to admit, she moved out and we have been enjoying the peace and quiet with no rampage behaviors...
Too old for that stuff anymore.
THank you again ladies.
To Live a Full life one must LOVE MANY THINGS- Vincent Van Gogh
Mary Fitzpatrick
#3232
http//www.Thepurplecrazylady.blogspot.com
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| ClaireSky |
Posted - Oct 28 2011 : 06:27:25 AM
Sending prayers your way. May God bless you!
Julie
Farmgirl Sister #399
West-Central WI Farmgirls
"Success is not the key to happiness. Happiness is the key to success. If you love what you are doing, you will be successful." Herman Cain |
| farmmilkmama |
Posted - Oct 28 2011 : 03:46:38 AM
You are in my thoughts - this is a tough situation, and its exactly what my parents ended up doing to my sister, at the same exact age! You have to do what you have to do, and there is no good reason to put up with the disrespect -even if it is your child! You have the right to be treated decently as any human being should and just because its your daughter doesn't mean she gets to walk all over you! It really is tough and I watched my parents struggle with the feelings it caused between them and my sister, and them and other family members who didn't get what was going on. (I was already out of the house.) You are in my thoughts - this is a rocky time and you need all the support you can get! :)
--* FarmMilkMama *--
Farmgirl Sister #1086
Be yourself.
Everyone else is already taken.
-Oscar Wilde
www.farmfoodmama.blogspot.com
www.thehmmmschoolingmom.blogspot.com |
| prariehawk |
Posted - Oct 27 2011 : 9:02:30 PM
I have a cousin who had a similar problem with their son. They had to force him to move out, he was drinking, using drugs,etc., and they run a day care from their home. Glad to say he's doing better now, guess he had an attitude adjustment. Sounds like you're doing the right thing, even though it feels wrong and hurts. The people we love are the ones who hurt us the most, and kids are often the worst offenders. Praying for your heart and for your daughter to wise up.
Cindy
"Vast floods can't quench love, no matter what love did/ Rivers can't drown love, no matter where love's hid"--Sinead O'Connor
"In many ways, you don't just live in the country, it lives inside you"--Ellen Eilers
Visit my blog at http://www.farmerinthebelle.blogspot.com/ |
| jan49829 |
Posted - Oct 27 2011 : 8:54:48 PM
I would have done the same thing. Give yourself time to heal. It will get easier as time goes by. When my daughter was a teen, she treated me like crap, like she just hated me. I could not do anything right. I hurt inside for years. She is now 33 and so loving, you would not believe it is the same girl!!!! I am praying that the outcome will be that way for you also.
Jan
Farmgirl Sister #3340
http://hardatworkcrafts.blogspot.com
http://Jan49829.etsy.com
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