| T O P I C R E V I E W |
| Lorie Marler |
Posted - Apr 19 2010 : 09:42:07 AM
I am in desperate need of simplyfing my life.
I have an addiction to collecting old things, handmade things, aprons, linens, anything that looks old or that someone took a lot of time to make. I can't stand the idea of something being thrown away that someone spent so long making like embroidered tablecloths ect. I also have a huge abundance of kitchen gadgets that never ever get used. I can't stop myself from haunting my local thrift store and buying up all the neat stuff but my house is overrun and I am getting stressed.
I may find 1 thing I like (for instance a gorgeous oil lamp) and before I know it I have 23 (yes that is not a typo) oil lamps. I tend to go overboard and can't help myself. I have tried to remind myself to Simplify and that Mary Jane lived in a tent without all these treasures and was perfectly happy but it breaks my heart to see these wonderful things get thrown away or left in the thrift store where no one appreciates them.
I have started gathering things up that I think other Farmgilrs might love and hope to send them out as gifts or RAOK but I know I will continue buying if I don't get help.
And don't even ask about my craft stuff. I have stuff for crafts I have never ever tried yet but think might be fun to make someday. Oh and my aprons. I have snatched up every apron I have ever seen in the thrift store and don't really have many that I wear.
I am truly addicted. Please give me advice and help a crazy farmgirl let go and simplify!
http://bikerbunniesrabbitry.webs.com |
| 25 L A T E S T R E P L I E S (Newest First) |
| msdoolittle |
Posted - Apr 28 2010 : 06:04:06 AM
Wow, I am so glad I'm among kindred spirits! I LOVE vintage things, and I snap them up like crazy! I mean, who can pass up a vintage handmade chicken basket cover for a dime???? Am I right? But, I contradict myself, because I HATE clutter. It makes me nervous. Lorie, you are going in the right direction by doing a little at a time. I have gone through my 'junk' soooo many times and it never ceases to amaze me how much of it I do NOT want, lol.
I have a storage building FULL of stuff THAT I HAVE NOT TOUCHED IN ALMOST 2 YEARS. It is sheer insanity. My mother has 2 HUGE barns FULL of some stuff that literally has not seen the light of day in 20+ years. We are planning on a barn sale next month.
Thanks for posting, Lorie, you have inspired me to have a giant yard sale!!! :0)
FarmGirl #1390
www.mylittlecountry.wordpress.com |
| barnagainkristin |
Posted - Apr 27 2010 : 7:29:34 PM
Lori,
Looks like you are doing so well and I knew you were on the right path just by recognizing the problem.
One thing that helps to remind me of how little I really need to be happy is to spend some time in nature. When I sit on top of a mountain and feel total peace I want to go home and get rid of almost everything. I just spent a few days in the desert and came home and cleaned the attic getting rid of 3 bags of clothes. I guess I need to go to the desert more often :)
I think it was H.H. Dalai Lama in "The Art of Happiness" that said something like... Think if you really need something. If you purchase it will it be bringing you towards your long term goal of happiness? When we leave something behind in a store sometimes we feel like we are going away from something good. If you think of it as if you are going towards being happier by leaving it behind it turns from a negative to a positive. Don't know if that made any sense since I'm not the best with words but it has helped me at times.
Have you thought of selling things on Etsy? I haven't tried it but I know lots of farmgirls sell things there. I think there is a section for vintage items. Who knows maybe you and your husband could make some money and go on a fun vacation or something. I'm sure there are others who would treasure your items and then you wouldn't be burdened with so much. You could be making others so happy. Maybe you were just the one to find those items and now it's your turn to pass them on.
Thanks for posting this because my daughter and I have been thrifting on Saturdays lately and you reminded me that filling my house up is not going to make me happy.
My latest items of interest are old time sewing notions that remind me of my grandma. It makes me so happy to see those old little cards with metal snaps on and remember my grandma with her sewing basket sewing snaps on the pajamas she was making for me. I guess I need to know that those notions won't bring grandma and the good times they remind me of back. Sounds like you are a little sentimental like me.
One day I saw an old tin in a thrift store and opened it up and found most likely someone elses grandmother's sewing tin with embroidery hoops, wooden spools of thread, and other sewing notions. I suddenly felt a connection to the little old woman who had sewed with these items and I felt sad that they hadn't been passed on to her family. I was so happy to find the old fashioned metal hoops like my grandmother had and I still treasure and use them to this day.
As you can see you are not the only one out there who couldn't pass something up.
I think your RAOK idea is wonderful but let others pay the postage. If you have any old sewing notions let me know :)
Best Wishes and let us know how things are going. Thanks for the reminder to stay away from thrift stores unless I really need something:)
barnagainkristin
"Others Before Self" |
| knitnpickinatune |
Posted - Apr 26 2010 : 08:19:10 AM
I agree with the small biz idea! You could get some of your $$$ back that way. I know ebay is having a deal where every month you can list 5 things for bid free.
My dad & I quit going to yard sales except for 2 that are neighborhood events every year. We were bringing home too much neat stuff and the house is still cluttered. Before that we were out every Sat. I do miss not exploring but it's saved $$ and space. I've been going thru my things and if I haven't used or read it in a year,up for bid it goes. The stress clutter can cause can be amazing. esp when you want in a certain part of the room & you have to move a ton of stuff to get to it. I collect 1920's sheet music for ukulele,old instruments such as uke & fiddle,( I fix em up) old photos of folk musicians,antique kitchen tools,(would love an old produce scale you hang from the ceiling!) dad collects aviation photos & military memorbelia. Let me know if you need help on ho to set up & sell on ebay.
http://www.mandolinbabe.info
http://www.mandolinbabe.net
@MandolinChick on Twitter
mando pickin & fiddle sawin' Farmgirl #702 |
| OneCraftyBugger |
Posted - Apr 25 2010 : 7:27:39 PM
Lori, If you would like to chat I may be able to give you a few pointers. I’ve been a professional organizer for fifteen years and have seen EVERY type of situation there is. Your on the right path, even if you do one small task a day to reach your goal. You may also want to consider donating some of your craft supplies to schools, old age homes or after school programs not only could they use them, but you may be able to take it as a tax deduction. Consideer donating items to the salvation army or other charities or churches they will sell them, once again a possible tax deduction. Maybe realizing that the items will not go to waist will help you to release some of them. And not only will be freeing yourself, but you'll be helping others. Happy to chat if you think it will help, shoot me an email. Robin
Oh happy day!
http://www.etsy.com/shop/TheFeltedGnome
http://bellasaysitsso.blogspot.com/
http://theswappingcrafter.blogspot.com/ |
| graciegreeneyes |
Posted - Apr 25 2010 : 08:08:02 AM
I'm in on this late too Lorie - I used to struggle with the same thing - I collected vintage clothes and got up to 90 dresses, I mean really....who needs 90? So I started a booth at an antique store, then when we moved to Portland, OR I had a couple good yard sales and sold the rest to vintage stores. Fortunately our thrift stores are no longer good, too expensive, and I have lost the habit!!
Amy Grace
Farmgirl #224
"use it up, wear it out, make it do, or do without"
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| EastTXFarmgirl |
Posted - Apr 25 2010 : 07:35:58 AM
Hey Lorie, I have a friend that has the same issue. He loves buying the types of things you seem to love. His wife was going crazy because their place was overflowing and he spent every spare dime they had. He took quiet a different approach. He knew he would not stop buying so he opened a small resale shop and has done really well. He is able to continue to purchase items he likes. He set up his shop like a home so he can spend all day with the items and as they sell he buys something else. At first he still worked a full time job outside the home and was open only 2 days a week. The shop did so well he does it full time now. He is no longer killing the family budget but instead has started contributing a good little sum to their retirement. He has had to move his shop twice to expand. He didn't just put a lot of junk on shelves he actually fixed it to where you feel you are walking through someones home. I think that is the big draw. People love it. Something to think about.
Begin each morning with a song in your heart. |
| debtea2 |
Posted - Apr 23 2010 : 5:14:40 PM
lorie
i was just like you its a form of OCD.
then one night i was watching
a show on tv and i think its was called
Hoarding:buried alive on TLC is on again on the april 25th
google its is all about hoarding and how it ruins lifes
and after seeing how those poor people lived
i got up and literaly cleaned tossed donated recycled and gifted
it took weeks and when i starting to faulter i'd watch another episode of the show
and get moving again.. it truly scared me to think this could be me..
talk about scared clean....lol
good luck deborah
http://jerseyfarmgirl.blogspot.com/
inch by inch we find our way
jersey farmgirl
#1330
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| MaryLD |
Posted - Apr 23 2010 : 10:41:30 AM
Lorie, I'm going to try to finish a project a week, too!
That's a GREAT idea, making it reasonable , not overwhelming, to get finished!
Mary LD
Haflingers- You can't have just one!
( I'm just one short of a drill team!) |
| Alee |
Posted - Apr 23 2010 : 06:34:02 AM
YAY Lorie!! That is great news!! I am so happy for you! I bet it feels awesome to see the progress you have made already!!
Alee
Farmgirl Sister #8
www.awarmheart.com
www.farmgirlalee.blogspot.com
www.allergyjourneys.blogspot.com
Put your pin on the farmgirl map! www.farmgirlmap.blogspot.com |
| farmmilkmama |
Posted - Apr 23 2010 : 05:01:48 AM
Good job Lori!!I got in kind of late on this thread, but it looks like you've already got some great advice and are on the right track. congrats!!!
--* FarmMilkMama *--
Farmgirl Sister #1086
Be yourself.
Everyone else is already taken.
-Oscar Wilde
www.wakeupstartlearning.blogspot.com
www.farmfoodmama.blogspot.com |
| melanie47601 |
Posted - Apr 23 2010 : 04:33:14 AM
YAY Lorie!!! You can do it!!
Hugs~ Melanie
Be the kind of woman that when your feet hit the floor each morning the devil says "Oh Crap, She's up!"
Blog~ http://wheelsarealwaysturning.blogspot.com/
Swap Blog~ http://mels-swapshop.blogspot.com/ |
| Calicogirl |
Posted - Apr 22 2010 : 8:11:42 PM
Good for you Lorie!!! Feels good doesn't it? :)
~Sharon
By His Grace, For His Glory
http://merryheartjournal.blogspot.com/ |
| Lorie Marler |
Posted - Apr 22 2010 : 7:39:53 PM
Great news!! I have a box full of things I am ready to part with, I have a few things set aside for Christmas gifts to friends and I am seriously thinking of bartering or RAOK some other things. I am not getting rid of my fabrics yet since all of that is nicely stored in plastic totes or any of my embroidery patterns ect since I truly love them and am working on some. I do have a plan now.
1. I have to totally love an item and know where it will go before I will buy it.
2. I will organize my laundry room (and stashing place) I plan on decorating it with some mismatched vintage curtains in coordinating fabrics that I already have. Hang mini aprons on the wall and display some of my treasures on the large shelf that is currently my stashing spot.
3. I will go through my craft supplies and thin out things by organizing a swap box.
4. I will try to finish 1 project a week so I can get some of these things put up.
I am so glad I am not the only collector around. I did get the 6 boxes of Christmas decorations put up and my spare bedroom was clean and guest ready. Good thing I got that done since we had an unexpected guest stay over and more coming in a few weeks. Thank you so much for all your advice!! I feel more empowered and confident I can get a handle on it. I just need to nail down how I am going to decorate each room and stick to it.
http://bikerbunniesrabbitry.webs.com |
| staci860 |
Posted - Apr 22 2010 : 12:28:20 PM
Lorie, well, I guess you can see you are not alone.
You've taken the first and hardest step. Admitting the problem and asking for help. The ladies here have given some of the best advice I've seen.
You can do it and I know that I can , too. I have a similar problem - not to the same extent (yet) but I love craft supplies and have so many projects started or still in the box.
My husband is also upset with the stuff that I haul home or hang on to. My home is filled with sentimental items from my family - It's a bit ridiculous at times but I just can't seem to pitch anything...I'll be following this thread, praying for all of us addicts and hopefully staying motivated to go home and at least sort out a few things to pass along. RAOK has been a good release for me.
Blessings, staci FG# 973
:o )
Happiness is a full clothesline...
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| Bonnie Ellis |
Posted - Apr 22 2010 : 01:14:29 AM
To all of you packrats out there: There is a way to keep all of your favorite stuff and have lots more space. TAKE PICTURES of all the things you love. Pretend you have to move to assisted living and measure your space. Then you can give some to friends, go to MJF Farm Fair in July and have fun watching people who will "love" your things and you know they will have a good home. It's not easy weeding through the "stuff" but with support of friends, it can be done. I've done it. I feel free to enjoy the space I have. The only problem is to really think "do I need, want, love that and where will it go". Good luck all. Bonnie
grandmother and orphan farmgirl |
| MaryLD |
Posted - Apr 19 2010 : 3:31:39 PM
Hi, Lorie,
You have already gotten TONS of great advice here. I used to over collect too, after my husband died. It was part of the grief process, picking up this and that things that reminded me of him- fabric, things to embroider, knic nacs. Eventually, I stopped just becuase it was costing too much. Then later, when I finished grieivng the loss, I actually used and gave away or bartered a lot of the fabrics that had piled up. While they were serving as a memorial, I could not use them!( I think you got one of them, the baseball fabric.) It may be helpful to see the itmes as symbolic, and keep a few or less of each like Alee said. Otherwise, it's like building a museaum where items are not being put to use!
Buying things can be a way of coping or maintaining control. It gets confusing when the things we collect lie close to our hearts , like Farmgirl items do. Getting rid of the things feels like getting rid of a piece of ourselves at first. But when things get out of balance, it's like we can't use or enjoy the things we have, and we have to clear out.
It's great that you could recognize that the collecting was getting out of control. Melanie's suggestion to consider a therapist is a good one, and we can all support you. The supplement 5-Htp, 50 mg at bedtime, can help raise seratonin levels in situations such as these when we feel out of control about cravings or addictions. Breaking patterns can be very hard but it is also very freeing. We have to re- focus the part of ourselves that collected, on something else, and that's where we eventually find freedom!
Pop me an email any time.
Your sister,
Mary LD
Haflingers- You can't have just one!
( I'm just one short of a drill team!) |
| Alee |
Posted - Apr 19 2010 : 1:54:30 PM
Oh Lorie! My heart goes out to you! I do the same thing when it comes to aprons and things with Arabian horse on them!!
You have been given some really EXCELLENT advice here! One thing that might make you feel better is if you knew your things were going to people who would appreciate them. What about doing a yard sale listed as "Farmgirl Vintage" or something like that so you know that only people who are interested is such things was drawn in.
*hugs* I know it will get better from here! I wish I could come out to help!
Another thing that some organizational experts do is put out three big tarps and you have to take everything out and sort it by keep, sell and throw away. Then when you go back inside you see how much room you have.
I would keep 1 or 2 of each item that you really love like the oil lamps and say no more than 7-10 aprons. Just keep what you can use or display and take the "cream of the crop" for example.
I bet you would be amazed at how many people are out there drooling over the thought of having some of your treasures! I am wishing I could come to your yard sale!! :D
Alee
Farmgirl Sister #8
www.awarmheart.com
www.farmgirlalee.blogspot.com
www.allergyjourneys.blogspot.com
Put your pin on the farmgirl map! www.farmgirlmap.blogspot.com |
| gramadinah |
Posted - Apr 19 2010 : 12:41:25 PM
Lorie can you post pictures? I think you have a great start for a small business. Get a camera if you don't have one and start taking pictures and selling it. If you like it someone will too. But just know that you don't need that much stuff either
Diana
Farmgirl Sister #273 |
| Calicogirl |
Posted - Apr 19 2010 : 12:38:32 PM
I understand Lorie. I often see great items at Thrift Stores and cannot believe that someone just got rid of it. I have to ask myself:
Will I use this? Is it even a style I like? Will it just be taking up space?
The other gals have given great advice. I know that when I declutter or give stuff away it gives me peace. I agree with the other gals, giving things away will bless you (your husband :)) and the recipient and free up room. Or maybe you should consider selling items on E-bay? If people are shopping there you know that they really want what they are bidding on. Just a thought :) I will be praying for the Lord to grant you self-control and wisdom :)
~Sharon
By His Grace, For His Glory
http://merryheartjournal.blogspot.com/ |
| Fiddlehead Farm |
Posted - Apr 19 2010 : 11:19:50 AM
Well, the first thing is realizing you have a problem. The next is have a big sale. Advertise it for free on Craig's list. Make big pretty signs and put them at good intersections. Now, sorting things for the sale...Put everything that is a duplicate in one pile, start with your oil lamps. When they are all together you can easily pick one or two to keep and sell the rest. Do this with everything you have and you will be amazed at how easier it gets. The money you will make can go into organizational stuff to help you simplify your home.
Why not go out on a limb, that's where all the fruit is! "Mark Twain"
http://studiodiphotosite.shutterfly.com/
farmgirl sister #922 |
| Diane B Carter |
Posted - Apr 19 2010 : 11:00:11 AM
Lorie, I also over collect things. So now I am just collecting the old jar openers. They don't take up much space and are kind of hard to find. Mailing things out can become expensive. A yard sale is a good idea, or donating things to a church rubbage sale, I have no space and my craft area needs to be cleaned out. I gave all my candy molds and everything to make candy to my sister-in-law. She really loved it. My other sister-in-law will get all my cloth material. She can sew anything so I know she will put it to good use. Giving items as gifts is also a good idea especially if someone really likes what you have..
I got rid of some things when I put a box on the chair and made myself put 3 items in it a day and I did not take any thing out. Your not alone in this, you may have convienced me to keep trying.... Good luck, I know it's hard but you can do it & so can I!
Hope all your days are Sunnydays.
dianebcarterhotmailcom.blogspot.com |
| melanie47601 |
Posted - Apr 19 2010 : 10:30:45 AM
Oh Lori~ sending you lots of hugs! It sounds as though you may have a bit of a hoarding issue or more than a bit. I'm sorry. I really do not say that to mean any offense at all. I clean homes and have been to a couple that have seen some hoarding issues. Nothing of course what the tv series showed and I'm not at all suggesting that you are in anyway like those on the tv either. But I hear your cries for help and I really do want to help you.
First rule of thumb- If you don't love it or use it and if it does not have "serious" sentimental value, get rid of it! From one recovering packrat to another, I know this is a very hard thing to do. But it is not impossible!
Now I love your thought on re-gifting. And I know we all love to share our treasures with our fellow farmgirls, but it can also be pricey when it comes to shipping those treasures. If you are sure you want to RAOK out some of your treasures, I will most happily include you in our fun RAOK list!
But here's another suggestion as a way to share your goodies with your farmgirl sisters that will not break the bank- List your items in the barter thread and ask the farmgirl to pickup the postal charges in exchange for the treasure.
Have a super-sized yardsale and mark everything with a price tag that's sure to move it out. Or consider selling on consignment.
But as for beginning your journey to a simpler, less cluttered home. Start with deciding on how you want to decorate your home. This is where I found my problem really found it's foundation to grow into a larger one. I like some many different styles and things, I just kept collecting and stashing and well you get the picture. I decided that I want to decorate my home in an antiquey country style.
When you start to de-clutter your home work in one room until it is finsihed. Start in one area and work in a circle. When your get rid of box gets full, get rid of it! Do not store it in another room to go through again later to make sure you didn't miss something. Just pitch it!
So here's a check list:
1. Decide on your decorating theme- something that you will LOVE to come home to everyday!
2. One room at a time! Do not tackle the whole house at once. This is extremely overwhelming and you will lose your will power and steam almost immeadiately.
3. Only keep the things you are going to use, have a strong emotional value or you LOVE like no other (say like your oil lamps, keep only your most favorited!)
4. Find a buddy close that can help you overcome this thriftin and collectin addiction. And if you ever need someone to talk to email me, write me, whatever. I will help you in any way that I can. I only wish I lived closer so I could be your cleaning buddy. ;)
5. Now this very possibly could be the hardest step of all. No more thriftin for awhile. Ouch! I know. Please don't hate me. Same goes for craft supplies. Use up what you have first. Everything will be ok. I promise.
And remember anytime you need to vent, feel stressed or feel the urge to thrift, I am here to help in any way that I can.
Hugs~ Melanie
Be the kind of woman that when your feet hit the floor each morning the devil says "Oh Crap, She's up!"
Blog~ http://wheelsarealwaysturning.blogspot.com/
Swap Blog~ http://mels-swapshop.blogspot.com/ |
| natesgirl |
Posted - Apr 19 2010 : 10:23:51 AM
I had a similar problem a while back with things to decorate the house with. I had enough to decorate four houses with! Really! When we got close to hitting bottom due to DH losing his job I realized how much wasted money I had laying around the house. I have gifted most of those things to family and friends as christmas and b-day so they can decorate thier houses. I now ask myself 'does this have a use or a spot at my home' before I allow myself to buy anything! It works well for me. By the way, I collect roosters, antique milk bottles, and music related decorations for our house and actually have very little right now. I'm not sure what RAOK is but would be interested in finding out so maybe we could do something about some of your stuff between the two of us. I am also planning on making an apron curtian for the kitchen window with chicken or food related patterned aprons. Could you do things like that with some of your aprons? Any of your collections you could re-purpose into something you want or need around your house? Maybe use the oil lamps as porch lights for evening company? I saw a house that had them around the porch rails with four tall legs holding up a metal cone shaped cover over each one. It kept the rain out of the lamps and the legs touched the lamps to hold them steady. The covers were screwed down with wing nuts so you can bring in the lamps for winter so they don't freeze. It was really pretty and you can get citronella scented oil to drive off the bugs. Just a thought.
God - Gardening - Family - Is anything else important? |
| gypsy goat |
Posted - Apr 19 2010 : 10:23:36 AM
i love old things too-i find it hard to believe some of the things people have no attachment to that belongs to family!!! i've had to stop going to my fav. haunts so as not to buy anymore. but i think the thread idea is really cool too-only i will have to stay away as i love aprons and old things!!!!!
whatever you are be a good one-abe lincoln |
| clothedinscarlet |
Posted - Apr 19 2010 : 10:18:12 AM
PS....I had to go look at your bunnies, Lorie. I love the white baby with the full "mustache". So cute! It must be fun to raise those soft little fluff balls!
Farmgirl Sister #1110
Siobhan - AKA Liza-Jane (my farmgirl name), wife to my best friend, Trent, and mommy to Camden (11/28/05) and Bennett (7/11/07). and Truman (7/28/09) |
