| T O P I C R E V I E W |
| ceejay48 |
Posted - Sep 27 2009 : 1:38:51 PM
09/13/12: My brother-in-law was able to hire a replacement for me right away and it seems like it is going pretty well. I was out of town last week so my not going to work with my sister didn't feel "funny". This week was different . . it DID feel "funny" to not go. Totally strange on Sunday evening to not be doing my usual preparing to go to work on Monday. BUT it's been really good to have this week to FINALLY clean my house and do some other things long overdue. Also, still selling at Farmers Market every Saturday so I do a lot of sewing.
Thanks for your prayers! I appreciate your continued prayers as I continue to work through the transition AND for finances. Our older sister from British Columbia is coming to visit and she has not seen our disabled sister for 6 years. She saw her briefly right after her accident but her condition has deterioriated considerably since then and I think she will be quite surprised.
Thank you again!
CJ
08/27/12: UPDATE: many of you were following this thread and still occasionally inquire. NOTHING, absolutely nothing has changed in progress for my sister's condition.
HOWEVER, after FOUR YEARS and ONE MONTH as her caregiver I'm ending my "career" as her caregiver, my last day tomorrow, 08/28/12. This has been the most difficult thing I've done and trying to be her caregiver AND her sister is nothing short of impossible. I'M SOOOOO BURNT!!
So, I'm changing back to just being her sister and will visit her as her sister.
Pray for her and her hubby as they adjust to a new caregiver. Pray for me as I make this transition AND for the significant financial impact it will have.
NOTE: Her 60th birthday is this coming Sunday, Sept. 2nd. She doesn't remember how old she is.
We are still very involved in the life of our 38 year-old son who has Down Syndrome. While he doesn't live with us, he lives nearby, we see him on a regular weekly basis, are also his legal guardians (yes, biolgoical parents too) and ultimately responsible for his care and decisions made for him.
Thanks so much!!!
CJ
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
 04/17/2012: Just a quick update. Many farmgirls were "following" this journey with me and I "retired" the thread for reasons I won't get into. Some farmgirls have inquired so, for now I'm posting a quick update, however the "thread" is still "retired.
THINGS WITH MY SISTER ARE UNCHANGED . It's been almost six years since her accident, it has been a very long, arduous, challenging journey. I still work as a caregiver for her 20 hrs/wk.. Nothing is changed, we just hang in there, do what we can for her and love her.
YOUR CONTINUED PRAYERS ARE APPRECIATED even though it a very, very LONG journey!
Thanks so much!
CJ
Hi Farmgirls...
Some of you may have read other posts where I talk about my sister who is brain-injured from a horseback riding accident in May 2006. She is totally dependent on others and disabled . . . and because of cognition issues it is like taking care of a baby . . .she just turned 57 years old.
She has also had both hips replaced, rt. one before her accident and lt. one after as it appeared that the same thing was happening to it as to the first one. The cup part of that lt. (2nd one) replacement has gone "bad" and the ortho surgeon has to re-operate. Her hosp. lab work showed some kind of infection that has been difficult to identify. Surgeon won't do surgery until she is well . . . he believes it to be an infection in her bones. She has been in hosp. for the past 3 days and they are "fixing" her up to come home tomorrow but will have weeks of IV antibiotic therapy with the assistance of home health nurses, etc.
In the meantime, she is no longer walking or standing because of the pain in her hip. Doing ALL the routine things one does with a disabled patient are VERY difficult because of this and it required monumental physical strength from caregivers . . . of which I am one.
Please pray for: healing of the infection so we can move on to repair of the hip problem.
- for adjustment of the shunt (in her brain to control hydrocephalus)
- for caregivers (there are 3 of us) to have STRENGTH, physical protection, and wisdom. For us to be encouraged as this is SO-O-O-O very discouraging and frustrating. Her caregivers are all family members, so we can't leave it when we go home.
This has been and is a very complicated situation . . . and things won't be resolved any time soon.
THANKS FOR YOUR PRAYERS!!!
CJ
...from the barefoot farmgirl in SW Colorado...sister chick #665 |
| 25 L A T E S T R E P L I E S (Newest First) |
| darlenelovesart |
Posted - Sep 18 2012 : 9:01:29 PM
Oh CJ I had no idea. I am putting you all in my prayers and will put you in my prayers as you go through this new transition in in your lives.
God bless you in all that you do and the life you have as just a sister to your sister be a rewarding one for you. God will work it out.
Blessings
darlene
I have learned that to have a good friend is the purest of all God's gifts, for it is a love that has no exchange of payment.
by Frances Farmer |
| Beth Jones |
Posted - Sep 18 2012 : 11:38:52 AM
Bless your heart...I know too of caring for a sister, but hers was a whole different story....You take care of yourself and remember that others are praying for you. Your daughter needs you so enjoy the blessings of that. You will be in my prayers..Smiles and hugs, Beth
You can never be to kind! |
| laurentany |
Posted - Sep 17 2012 : 11:58:56 AM
Thanks for the update CJ. I am glad to hear that the new caregive for Sis is working out well. (She is not your replacement- no one could replace YOU!)
I am happy that you have had some much needed and deserved time to focus more on you. I will continue to keep you all in prayer, and pray that your Older Sisters visit goes well.
Hugs,
~Laurie
"Little Hen House on the Island"
Farmgirl Sister#1403
View my New Blog:
http://simplesuburbanpleasures.blogspot.com
Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.. |
| ceejay48 |
Posted - Sep 02 2012 : 09:12:55 AM
Thank you girls, again, for your encouragment, friendship and prayers!!
Robin and I are having a lovely time on our glamping trip . . . you can check it out and "follow" our adventure in OUTPOST in the thread titled "4871 GLAMPING FARMGIRLS . . . in Arizona!". We like to post a few pics, make comments and share our adventure over several days . . .so you can go there.
Thanks again!
CJ
..from the barefoot farmgirl in SW Colorado...sister chick #665.
2010 Farmgirl Sister of the Year
Mother Hen: FARMGIRLS SOUTHWEST HENHOUSE
living life - www.snippetscja.blogspot.com
from my hands - www.cjscreations-ceejay.blogspot.com
the "Purple Thistle" http://www.ceejay48.etsy.com
from my heart - www.fromacelticheart.blogspot.com
from my hubby - www.aspenforge.blogspot.com |
| craftingram |
Posted - Sep 02 2012 : 06:25:25 AM
CJ, I wanted to add my hugs and tell you I think you've done an amazing job and have been a wonderful sister. As a retired RN I know how stressful and exhausting caregiving can be. I won't say don't feel guilty, because I know that is much easier said than done, but I will say don't give into it. You are going through a type of grief and it will take time, but I know you will come flying through. When you feel them coming, cry your tears, then dry them and know you made the right decision. Have a wonderful, wonderful time glamping with Robin. Can't wait to hear about it and see pictures and to hear what's going on in this next stage of your life.
Karin
Farmgirl Sister #2708
Romans 8: 38,39 |
| violetrose |
Posted - Sep 01 2012 : 6:10:35 PM
CJ, Sending big hugs to you! I know you and Robin are Glamping this weekend and I am thankful you two have this special time together to, just have fun and relax. I'm sure there is lots of laughter, which is so very good for your soul.
You have been a wonderful caregiver to your Sister, as well as her loving sister, which you will continue to be. Please don't "listen" to any of those guilt thoughts, as they are not from the Lord. You have given your all, now it's time for you to take care of your sweet man, son and CJ. Enjoy retirement :)
love you
Ruthie
Farmgirl Sister # 1738
God loves each one of us as if there were only one of us!
St. Augustine |
| Bear5 |
Posted - Aug 31 2012 : 07:55:27 AM
CJ: I will be praying for you. I'm sure you'll continue to be a blessing to your sister. Hugs.
Marly
"It's only when we truly know and understand that we have a limited time on earth- and that we have no way of knowing when our time is up- that we will begin to live each day to the fullest, as if it was the only one we had." Elisabeth Kurler-Ross |
| dutchy |
Posted - Aug 30 2012 : 8:16:18 PM
CJ I believe that was a difficult decision you made, but also one that HAD to be made to keep you sane. I know all about caregiving as you may remember and it was the most difficult thing i have ever done in my life. Emigrating was a piece of cake compared to caregiving. Lot's of hugs to you and enjoy your glamping trip to the fullest!!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Hugs from Marian/Dutchy
(Formerly living in the Netherlands, but now I live in Thailand *__*)
http://pinkprincessinthailand.blogspot.com/ |
| ceejay48 |
Posted - Aug 30 2012 : 7:40:56 PM
Thank you girls!
I'm headed out tomorrow for a Glamping weekend with my daughter in Flagstaff, Arizona. It'll be a nice break and the two of us always have such fun together.
I'm looking forward to the time to just relax, refresh and rejuvenate!
Thanks again!
CJ
..from the barefoot farmgirl in SW Colorado...sister chick #665.
2010 Farmgirl Sister of the Year
Mother Hen: FARMGIRLS SOUTHWEST HENHOUSE
living life - www.snippetscja.blogspot.com
from my hands - www.cjscreations-ceejay.blogspot.com
the "Purple Thistle" http://www.ceejay48.etsy.com
from my heart - www.fromacelticheart.blogspot.com
from my hubby - www.aspenforge.blogspot.com |
| kristin sherrill |
Posted - Aug 30 2012 : 11:27:41 AM
CJ, you will be ok. And so will your sister. Now you can go see her and have a good time with her instead of working when you're there. So I agree with your friends, you did do the right thong for the both of you.
Hugs, Kris
Happiness is simple.
www.kris-outbackfarm.blogspot.com |
| prayin granny |
Posted - Aug 30 2012 : 10:15:23 AM
Prayers as you begin this new journey in your life!
Hugs,
Linda
Country at Heart |
| Joey |
Posted - Aug 29 2012 : 11:29:15 PM
CJ, I had no idea. I imagine this was such a hard decision for you. I know how burnt out I was with my Dadand I was only his caregiver for 2 years. I have been an active psych RN for 39 years and I know how tired I am. To actively be the caregiver for a family member is even harder. What an incredible blessing you have been to your sister and your family. How well deserved this retirement is. It will seem strange to you to "just be her sister" for awhile. Tears are good but no guilt. You have given of your heart and hands for SO many years. I am in awe. God bless you and you "new life", CJ. Won't it be nice to "sleep-in" just one day. Hugs, to you, Joey
Well behaved women rarely make history. |
| FieldsofThyme |
Posted - Aug 29 2012 : 12:38:20 PM
Still praying for you. Hugs.
Farmgirl #800
http://pioneerwomanatheart.blogspot.com/
http://scrapreusedandrecycledartprojects.blogspot.com/
From my hands: http://pioneerpatchworkhomespun.blogspot.com/
From my Camera: http://www.flickr.com/photos/pioneerwomanatheart/
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| laurentany |
Posted - Aug 29 2012 : 12:32:21 PM
Passing a big hug and a hankie to you too CJ. I am sure you will go through many emotions, but from the outside looking in, I think you are making the right decision. God Bless you!
Hugs,
~Laurie
"Little Hen House on the Island"
Farmgirl Sister#1403
View my New Blog:
http://simplesuburbanpleasures.blogspot.com
Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.. |
| ceejay48 |
Posted - Aug 29 2012 : 10:33:51 AM
Thank you girls! I told her yesterday that it was time for me to just come visit her as her SISTER! That I'd be back to see her.
Today I'm already feeling a little bit guilty . . . :(
But I also just talked to some people that knew us when we were kids (that haven't seen us in decades) and they have reassured me that I'm making a wise decision. And, so now . . . I'm in tears!
Thanks again!
CJ
..from the barefoot farmgirl in SW Colorado...sister chick #665.
2010 Farmgirl Sister of the Year
Mother Hen: FARMGIRLS SOUTHWEST HENHOUSE
living life - www.snippetscja.blogspot.com
from my hands - www.cjscreations-ceejay.blogspot.com
the "Purple Thistle" http://www.ceejay48.etsy.com
from my heart - www.fromacelticheart.blogspot.com
from my hubby - www.aspenforge.blogspot.com |
| Marcy |
Posted - Aug 29 2012 : 10:15:39 AM
Will be keeping you all in my thoughts and prayers. We have your back, girlfriend!! You are never alone.
big hugs
Marcy
Farmgirl #170
Since you get more joy out of giving joy to others, you should put a good deal of thought into the happiness that you are able to give...Eleanor Roosevelt
http://marcysworldofcreativity.blogspot.com/
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| texdane |
Posted - Aug 29 2012 : 09:43:56 AM
Dear CJ,
You are in my prayers, dear Farmgirl. You are a blessing to your family, and a blessing to the Farmgirl Forum! Big hugs to you, Sweetie.
Nicole
Farmgirl Sister #1155
KNITTER, JAM-MAKER AND MOM EXTRAORDINAIRE
Chapter Leader, Connecticut Simpler Life Sisters
Suburban Farmgirl Blogger
http://sfgblog.maryjanesfarm.org/ |
| Cherime |
Posted - Aug 29 2012 : 09:09:23 AM
Praying for you.
CMF |
| Alee |
Posted - Aug 29 2012 : 07:44:15 AM
CJ- My heart and prayers are with you- I know this change will be a big one for everyone involved but I know how wearing being a caregiver of a family member can be. *hugs* You are an amazing soul. *hugs*
Alee
Farmgirl Sister #8
www.farmgirlalee.blogspot.com
www.allergyjourneys.blogspot.com
[url=http://www.TickerFactory.com/weight-loss/wff7Xpc/]
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| ptroupe |
Posted - Aug 28 2012 : 10:01:55 PM
Oh, CJ,
I just read of this. I had no idea. What a self-less and loving thing to do. May God richly bless you. Enjoy your retirement, continue to visit as her sister, and enjoy those times with her.
Portia
Wishing for the country life! |
| laurentany |
Posted - Aug 28 2012 : 8:11:37 PM
CJ,
I am praying for all of you, for God's strength, wisdom and love to embrace you during this difficult transition.
I know that your faith will see you through this, but I am here for you if you need anything at all.
Hugs to you sweet sister!
~Laurie
"Little Hen House on the Island"
Farmgirl Sister#1403
View my New Blog:
http://simplesuburbanpleasures.blogspot.com
Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.. |
| pennyhenny |
Posted - Aug 27 2012 : 3:14:52 PM
May God Bless you and all you have done. My mom is a care-giver full time to her brother and has been for the last 12 years and she is in the process of turning his care over to someone else. I see her guilt and her sometimes flashes of having a life again.
You did your best and now it's time to take of YOU.
BIG HUGS and PRAYERS for you.
hugs,
-missy-
http://citychickblogging.blogspot.com/
Sisterhood Member#4003
Happiness held is the seed; Happiness shared is the flower.
John Harrigan |
| laurentany |
Posted - Apr 17 2012 : 8:50:44 PM
Thank you CJ for all that you do for all of us here. Will continue to keep you and your entire family in prayer.
Hugs,
~Laurie
"Little Hen House on the Island"
Farmgirl Sister#1403
Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.. |
| OneHippieChick |
Posted - Feb 28 2011 : 11:33:34 PM
Just now reading about this! I'm so sorry CJ...You all are in my thoughts and prayers!!!
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Susan ~ Farmgirl Sister #1978
Fiber artist, spins, knits, crochets, sews, weaves, quilts, soap maker, as well as various beauty products and some natural cosmetics
Working on getting my Etsy website and blog up and running - stay tuned!
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| debtea2 |
Posted - Feb 12 2011 : 12:56:14 PM
Ceejay god bless you sweetie
blessings and hugs deborah
inch by inch we find our way
jersey farmgirl
#1330
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