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 "cry it out" and other methods for sleeping babies

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tatersgirl913 Posted - Dec 01 2010 : 08:42:00 AM
What method did you use to get your baby to sleep without needing rocked or nursed to sleep and at what age?
I know there are many pasionate opinions on the "cry it out" method and I'm on the fence about it but I'd like to hear from you what you tried and what worked.

8   L A T E S T    R E P L I E S    (Newest First)
Beverley Posted - Dec 09 2010 : 9:20:17 PM
well I am just going to say that letting them cry themselves to sleep is a crock. If you watch the animal kingdom all animals snuggle their babies. no letting them cry it out. Babies are small for so little of time snuggle and rock those babies if the babies want it. I know some babies who like to be in the crib and like their own space but for the one who don't pick them up and hold on cause it just a little while they will be not wanting too....

Folks will know how large your soul is by the way you treat a dog....Charles F. Doran
beverley baggett Beverley with an extra E...
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msdoolittle Posted - Dec 09 2010 : 11:03:40 AM
All babies are different, of course, so they'll all have their own preferred method of going to sleep. My first child slept in my room until she was about 14 months. Around that time, I transistioned her to her own bed (crib). When I noticed that she was sleepy (rubbing eyes, lolling around, etc.), I put her in her crib. Some nights she'd go right to sleep and others she would cry for up to 30 minutes. No, I didn't like the CIO method at all, but occasionally, I had to do it. Otherwise, she'd stay up far too late and would be a little crank in the morning. If she had had a late nap, naturally, I'd have to adjust her bedtime for a later time. It didn't take that long and she would finally fall asleep on her own. At one point, she did have a tv in her room and she'd fall asleep to a movie. Wouldn't recommend that really, but it did work. I'm sure that's a big ol' parenting 'no no' but whatever.

My second child began sleeping alone at 8 months. Easy as laying her down in her crib and walking away. When she learned to talk, she'd tell me she was sleepy and that was it. No crying or fussing.

A mom can, in time, tell the difference between a 'fake' cry and a 'real, I-need-help' cry. You learn to her the urgency in their voice. Also, I would say that I don't think anyone should expect a child under about 6-8 months to happily sleep through the night without you. That's just my experience, but I think it's ridiculous for people to make new moms feel bad or guilty for letting their infant sleep with them or by them when they are so young.

FarmGirl #1390
www.mylittlecountry.wordpress.com
natesgirl Posted - Dec 02 2010 : 09:57:58 AM
All 3 of our girls are on different sleep routines. They all go to sleep with music or tv, which I know turns a lot of stomaches, but I need the help and the stress reduction involved. I have a 16y/o, a 10y/o, and a 2y/o. They all sleep better with noise rather than silence, so the tv or radio gives them that. Plus, I can clean around them, talk around them, whatever, and they don't wake up at every little sound.

I have always just let them regulate themselves. You can't force the sun to rise, the rain to fall, or an energetic baby to sleep! LOL!

Farmgirl Sister #1438

God - Gardening - Family - Is anything else important?
knittingmom Posted - Dec 02 2010 : 06:56:37 AM
I have never let our babies cry themselves to sleep (including new number 4). I don't subscribe to the view that babies are manipulative, infants cry for a reason and I don't believe you can spoil a little tiny one. If the babies didn't just fall asleep while eating I'd put them in the baby sling (if you don't have one, get one is my recommendation) and they'd be out very quickly.

I've found with my kids if they didn't want to settle down when they were very small it was usually for a reason (gas, burp, just wanting to be held).

You can begin sleep routines as they get older. Dr. Sears also has good recommendations.

"There is no foot so small that it cannot leave an imprint on this world"
MamaCrunch Posted - Dec 02 2010 : 06:47:26 AM
I personally don't believe in CIO or any other form of sleep training.

For DS bedtime came at his own pace just like everything else. Around 11 months he started pushing his bedtime drink way. We still offer a sippy cup but he has to hold it so he can put it down when he's done.

He never enjoyed being rocked so we'd snuggle next to him and almost make a human swaddle. Around 12 months he started wanting to stumble around his bed while crawling for a few minutes before snuggling down and drifting off. He sleeps on a Montessori floor bed so it's easy for him to climb into bed himself and we can lay down next to him if needed. FWIW he's 13 months old now.

As far as creating a rountine, that never really worked for us. He would fight them and our lives are so scattered that it was hard to be consistent. We'd just follow his cues as to what he needed and when. We've just recently started to make quiet time before bed. He can play but the room is dim and we don't use loud toys or anything like that. Usually he is almost asleep by the time he crawls into bed.

I highly recommend reading the No Cry Sleep Solution. There are a lot of very helpful hints that have worked for us over the 6 months or so.

Farmgirl #2161
Just tryin' to homestead in the middle of a suburban neighborhood!
Blog~ http://thelittleboygreen.com <<I've been slackin' on the updates!
Prairie Gypsy Posted - Dec 01 2010 : 3:40:39 PM
I'm in agreement with Jewel. I'm a mother of four also and the crying themselves to sleep with just too rough. I also found that when I tried using that method that the kids didn't sleep as well during the night and were more prone to waking up. I used a variety of methods including rocking, singing or playing music, letting them sleep with me/us, and eventually let them sleep on the couch next to me while I read to them and then would move them to their beds. Most of them between the age of 3 and 4 were okay with sleeping in their beds. Until they moved out of the house, my bed was the bed to be in if they got sick or weren't feeling well. We did eventually end up with a routine of sorts where they would take their baths, get their pajamas on, we'd eat a snack, and then curl up on the couch to read or watch a video and then they'd go off to their rooms where they were allowed to "read" until they were ready for bed. I found a gentler method was less stressful on me and the kids slept far better without the trama. My best advise is that if it doesn't feel right, don't do it. HOpe you find a method that works for you.

Farmgirl Sister # 2363
http://twilightburrough.blogspot.com/
Warren, MI
FebruaryViolet Posted - Dec 01 2010 : 2:02:19 PM
We only have one (22 months old), and true to her nature, Violet just does what she does. No amount of "routine" or preparation has aided this baby girl into sleeping. She slept like a log at 2.5 months old, almost 7 hours at a time, and has consistently slept through the night. However, GETTING her to bed at a reasonable hour has been the challenge...until 3 weeks ago when she just regulated herself. She has never wanted to be rocked or held to sleep. She's just not that baby...

We tried several things. Initially, she would fall asleep around 8 or so in her play-yard in the living room, and we would move her into her nursery. Then she started a night owl streak. Up til 11, 12, sometimes 1:00 in the morning, and us too. It got very frustrating and all attempts at putting her into her room resulted in crying so much that she vomited--even if I was sitting right beside the crib, or marathon crying sessions which left us both exhausted and stressed. Sad, scary, messy and again, frustrating.

A few weeks ago, she said to my husband and I about 9:30 one night..."sheep". Which is "sleep". And I said, "are you ready for night night?" Took her into her room, turned off the light, put her into her crib, covered her, kissed her and NOT A PEEP. And each night has been the same since.

I can't advocate any method other than what works with your home and your lives. I do know that I was NOT a fan of the crying-make-yourself-so-upset-that-you-vomit-method. I've never felt more guilty in my whole life.


Musings from our family in the Bluegrass http://sweetvioletmae.blogspot.com/
Mama Jewel Posted - Dec 01 2010 : 1:45:29 PM
We have four children. When we were first parents, my mom "advised" me about the CIO method & we tried that & honestly it hurt to do it. Just didn't feel natural or good, but didn't know any differently. Over the years through reading and coming into my own parenting style, everything, I mean everything seemed to change to a more natural way for us (eating organically, no chemicals in the house, etc) & we went to the rock the child to sleep. Our second and third children went to sleep easily and quickly. Our fourth child has taken a lot more time to ultimately have him sleep in his own bed & we're there, but he's 4 1/2 yrs old (talk about patience, eh? lol) I would rock him in my glider and sing to him like the others, but he has a lot of anxiety which is difficult for him both during the day and at night. I would wait until he fell asleep and transfer him into his crib when he was a baby. Then eventually I had him in my bed instead of a crib and then eventually I moved him up to his brother's room and slept on the floor next to his bed and now I sleep in my own bed and he shares a room with his brother, sleeping in his own bed, the bottom bunk). I think spending time rocking & holding them has been some of my most precious memories for me. They grow up so quickly. The best advice I can probably give is follow your mama's heart. A cry really is their only voice to let you know that they're hungry, wet, tired, or scared. I hope that helps.

Farm Girl Sister #1683 Living Simply & Naturally on our lil Sweet Peas Farmette
"Do Everything in Love." 1 Cor 14
http://www.piecemama.etsy.com

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