| T O P I C R E V I E W |
| Sitnalta |
Posted - Jun 09 2007 : 5:24:40 PM
Hi Farmgirl Friends,
I have a 1yr old and a 4month old. It seems like all I do is argue with my 1yr old about everything. Its hard to put my foot down with her because I feel guilty that I was expecting #2 and couldn't do things with her like I'd like.
My 4 month old is a sweetheart, but he never wants to be put down and screams all the time. He had colic but it seems to have subsided.
I work a lot to try and get out of the house and ashamed to say that I think I'm hiding out from them both! I feel so terrible about it.
Has anyone else every experienced this baby burnout??
Blessed assurance, Jesus is mine; O What a foretaste of Glory DIVINE! |
| 11 L A T E S T R E P L I E S (Newest First) |
| juliet79 |
Posted - Jun 12 2007 : 2:47:54 PM
I have a 5, 3, and 1 year old, and run a daycare. I feel your frustration! You need to make sure you are taking time for yourself, and do not feel guilty about it. You will be a better mom if you feel energized and refreshed after some alone time. Just think, if you didn't get a break, you would feel tired, deprived of adult conversation, and the tension builds. Find a friend in a similar situation and offer to watch her kids for an entire day, and then switch off each week or two! Trust me, it works!
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| primjillie |
Posted - Jun 11 2007 : 08:51:47 AM
Well, I disagree with time away being a want ~ sometimes you NEED the time away to regroup and be a better mom. If a mom gets burnt out and can't care for her babies, it's not a want. Some of us can be with our kids 24/7 and struggle through it. Others need a break sometimes. For me, when they were little was my easiest time. Their needs were simple ~ food, love, sleep and a little play. I had three in three years, so I know it can be overwhelming when they all need you at once. Just take it day by day and soon they will be entertaining each other and that will make it easier for you. Be firm, but gentle with your older one ~ it easy to forget she is just a baby too. Good luck ~ these years really are the fun ones ~ teenage years not so much! |
| ArmyWifey |
Posted - Jun 11 2007 : 07:47:10 AM
Well that's close together but you can do it! Remember these wee ones depend on you.
Perhaps try carrying the 4mo old more in a sling (http://www.maywrap) and I can say from experience I wish I would have just gotten down and played with mine while they were little more - they grow so fast!
You do not NEED a day out - it's just nice. There's a big difference between needs and wants and we American's aren't very good at differentiating them! And yes I can say that cause I'm still a single mom half the time! And there are days when I want to put all mine in public school or military school! ;) and yes two of mine are only 22 months apart.
Try to sit down and pray, prioritize, talk to hubby about what your goals are for your family. What you want to look like in 5 years, next year? Then talk about how to get there. Maybe him helping in the evenings a bit more is all you need.
Don't give in to the one year old! Set specific boundaries and then stick to them - no matter how cute she may be or what kind of fit she throws. She needs a Mom who is consistent more than a Mom who's fun - ie it's time for bed. We've tried to teach our kids that obedience is the Immediate, complete and cheerful. That means the first time (at one you can say twice), do it all not just half way, and say yes mam, have a happy countenance. Now at one I realize there is some leeway here but not that much. Charlotte Mason says that the Mother who has taught her child to obey by the time she's one has secured ease for her days --- it's true! She most certainly can obey you. Please don't do the counting thing........all that does is teach them to delay obedience until Mom REALLY means it.
God has given you these children and while you may not always understand why or feel like there's got to be a better mother out there somewhere that's not the case! You are the perfect Mom for those kiddos.
Blessings!
As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord!
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| _Rebecca_ |
Posted - Jun 11 2007 : 05:19:12 AM
I had my first two almost exactly two years apart. It was the HARDEST WORK I'VE EVER DONE MY WHOLE LIFE!!!!!
If I had it to do alllllll over again, I would have utilized the playpen for my oldest child at set times during the day. I would have enrolled my oldest in some kind of Mother's Day Out and been more sensitive to his needs for more stimulation and interaction. I would have asked for HELP.
: ) Most of the moms at my church get the help of college students to help with small children/toddlers/babies. I wish I had done that. I was just so DANG stubbornly independent. Now I realize that I hurt us in the longrun. There was no reason for me to feel like I had to do it all. : 0)
.·:*¨¨* :·.Rebecca.·:*¨¨* :·. http://boinglink.blogspot.com/ |
| Sweet Harvest Homestead |
Posted - Jun 11 2007 : 04:30:06 AM
Oh Jessie,
I remember those days. I had two boys, 17 months apart and although my eldest was a sweetheart most of the time. He did get a little jealous of his little brother.
I wore the baby in a sling quite often. Problem was, when I went to put him down he cried.
Somedays I felt like I was being punished because it was so crazy. Look for the humor in the situations. I used to sit and laugh a lot at the antics of two very small boys.
One time, while I was doing a load of laundry, they became very quiet. I got to missing them and finally found them in the bathroom. Nate and Wesley were taking turns sticking their heads in the toliet, getting the tops of their heads wet and laughing at each other. I am certain that Nate instigated the whole thing. Then another time, while I was actually in the bathroom ALONE! for a few minutes, I cam out and asked Nate "where's Wesley"? He was only about10 months old at the time. Nate started laughing and pointing to the dryer. I ran to the dryer and opened it and there sat my baby on top of the clothes with a sock in his mouth. I gave a big prayer of thanks that Nate did not know how to turn the dryer on.
Now they are bigger 7 and 6 and they have a 3 year old sister. Those crazy, wild baby days will pass all too soon. It will get easier sweet Jessie! I promise.
Lindy
www.sweetharvesthomestead.typepad.com |
| Marybeth |
Posted - Jun 10 2007 : 12:29:59 PM
It seemed that my babies were babies all at once by we all managed to live through it. Soon things will level out and before you know it they will be teen-agers and you will say 'Oh, why can't they be babies again". I had 4 teens together and all at once and now they are nice young ladies off and doing their own thing. Take care. MB
www.strawberryhillsfarm.blogspot.com
www.day4plus.blogspot.com www.holyhouses-day4plus.blogspot.com
"Life may not be the party we hoped for...but while we are here we might as well dance!" |
| levisgrammy |
Posted - Jun 10 2007 : 12:20:11 PM
It's why grandmas are handy to have around. :)
"The earth is the Lord's and the fullness thereof and all that dwell therein."
www.torismimi.blogspot.com |
| Sitnalta |
Posted - Jun 10 2007 : 08:52:51 AM
thanks ladies~ its nice to know someone out there knows what life is like ;)
Blessed assurance, Jesus is mine; O What a foretaste of Glory DIVINE! |
| UrbanChick |
Posted - Jun 10 2007 : 07:54:05 AM
My daughter can be a handful at times, she goes to alot of therapies but she also goes to daycare twice a week to be with "typical" children. We use is as an excuse for her to learn how to be a typical child, learn child jargon and speech. Her doctors say it helps her to be with and learn from children how to be a child instead of her adult therapists helping her. I'm sorry to say I'm always glad to be without her for 4 hours on Thursday and Friday. I drop her off (luckily she loves school) then I go celebrate my solitude by taking myself out to lunch. I get housework done and sometimes I just drive around. I wouldn't be to hard on yourself, we all need a break sometimes.
"Courage dosen't always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying: I will try again tomorrow." |
| BotanicalBath |
Posted - Jun 09 2007 : 8:44:35 PM
That normal.... you need a day out with your girlfriends... adult talk and wear nice clothes again for a day.
You just need to be recharged.
E-
BotanicalBath@peoplepc.com www.Botanical-Bath.com www.BotanicalBath.etsy.com http://botanicalbath.blogspot.com/
"I do my housework in the nude. It gives me an incentive to clean the mirrors as quickly as possible." |
| Love-in-a-Mist |
Posted - Jun 09 2007 : 5:38:17 PM
Don't be so hard on yourself, that is alot for anyone to handle! I would ask God for strength and remember it's easier to start disciplining now, than waiting until they can scream louder and throw bigger tantrums. I hope your days get better!
http://love-in-a-mist-shannon.blogspot.com/ |
