| T O P I C R E V I E W |
| KYgurlsrbest |
Posted - Aug 06 2007 : 06:30:14 AM
does anyone have any suggestions (natural)for boosting one's...ahem...desire? This is a really difficult topic for me, but I'm kindof at my end. For the last two years or so (I'll be 34 in October), intimacy has been a real gray area for me--I can take it or leave it. I love companionship and being around my dh, and when he initiates, I'm happy to (except at 3 in the am, which is his norm lately  ), but I'm really bothered by my lack of interest, so to speak. Last year, I talked with my obgyn about this same thing, and she felt that I'd been on the same bc pill for too long--she switched it up, and for a little while, it seemed to work, but now I'm back where I started. I know I'm not in my 20's anymore, but around 28 or so, I really felt a huge increase in my desire, and it was great--I really felt happy all the way around, really. Now, I just feel like I'm some old hag. I don't know if all women go through this, or what? It sure doesn't seem like it--seems like most married women, younger and even older than me, don't need "coaxing" like I do.
Anyone else have experience in this area? This is really starting to affect all of me--especially my mentality. I feel almost cloistered, or something.
"She was built like a watch, a study in balance ... with a neck and head so refined, like a drawing by DaVinci"...
NY Newsday sportswriter Bill Nack describing filly, Ruffian. |
| 9 L A T E S T R E P L I E S (Newest First) |
| Alee |
Posted - Aug 07 2007 : 12:41:20 PM
Jonni-
To be honest I feel the same way. I go in cycles of desire verses no desire. I haven't been on BC for a while because the doctors think it was letting me get pregnant and then was causing me to miscarry. I certainly would agree with talking to your doctor about the possibly of going off the BC and even maybe just using condoms or something similar to prevent pregnancy instead.
*hugs*
Another thing you could try is just having your guy take you out for a romance night. Candle lit dinner, good sweet conversation, lots of sweet nothings whispered in each other's ears, walking hand in hand.
Sometimes we need a really good dose of pheremones from our partner to jump start our desires.
Alee
The amazing one handed typist! One hand for typing, one hand to hold Nora!
http://home.test-afl.tulix.com/aleeandnora/ |
| KYgurlsrbest |
Posted - Aug 07 2007 : 12:19:22 PM
Looks like I'm headed to the herb store after work. It's a good thing I spoke up--thanks, girls, for not making me feel so alone. I'm sorry that some of us are experiencing this, but I'm also glad that we can at least "talk" to one another about it. It's true, I am tired, but it's something more, too. Just like I said..."gray". I don't feel that way about anything else in my life, so I know it's certainly something to pay attention to. I would consider depression, or something like that if it was all the way around.
I'll look up the books, also..I'm very interested in trying to turn this around.
"She was built like a watch, a study in balance ... with a neck and head so refined, like a drawing by DaVinci"...
NY Newsday sportswriter Bill Nack describing filly, Ruffian. |
| ruralfarmgirl |
Posted - Aug 07 2007 : 09:53:53 AM
There is a great book (well several) on this topic "what your doctor hasnt told you about pre-menopause" By Dr. John Lee - now I know.. in your twenties you arent thinking about menapause - but there is awesome infor on that.......In my twenties and early thirties I had 4 little ones - and was exhausted.. so if that is the case, cut yourself some slack it will all come back once you get some sleep :)..., make sure you have yourself on your own priority list and take time for you......that being said.... I started on natural hormone cream, off the pill and knowing my cycle and it was AWESOME for me......................you can never know to much about your own body and what works for you........................get Dr. Lee's book - and Dr. Sheryl Hart's.... they are great education..... I am 44 and feel like I am 19 :) Jonnie- it address endometriosis too......
Rene'~Farm Girl
"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate, but that we are powerful beyond measure......" |
| Vintage Redhead |
Posted - Aug 07 2007 : 09:25:48 AM
I have found the herbal formulas from Dr. Schulze to be *awesome* for this!! I take the Ech+ and Super Tonic to help boost my immunity to various "nuisance" ailments like colds and chronic sinus symptoms. I am going to start the Fem+ to help relieve PMS symptoms and am going to get DH the Male formula. (www.herbdoc.com)
If you look into any of Dr. Schulze's tonics, I'll warn you up front: they taste *nasty* on their own. But I mix them with organic apple cider vinegar and tomato juice and they actually become palatable. I *swear* by them! ~ Kaylyn
~ Kaylyn ~ (Living in Suburbia with a FARMGIRL Heart!)
My Cause: http://nickspavilion.com/
My Life: http://vintageredhead.blogspot.com |
| ivmeer |
Posted - Aug 06 2007 : 09:20:40 AM
I'm 31 and a new mom (my baby is 10 months old) and for me, it's all about getting enough sleep. Problem is, by the time my husband gets home (he does flex time and doesn't usually get home until 7 p.m., and he leaves the house at around 7 a.m.), and we sit down to dinner, get the baby ready for bed, and take care of any chores we may have left, we're both exhausted, especially me. |
| UrbanChick |
Posted - Aug 06 2007 : 07:15:50 AM
I have the same problem. I'm 33 and we (my Dh 43 and I) are in a slump. Problem is he and I are in the slump together. I think my problem is that I've gained weight, I'm a little depressed more often than not and I have other stressors that interfer with intimacy. I know DH is stressed at work and worried about family. I started working out at a gym and that has helped some. I taking horseback riding lessons and that has helped with my depression. We still have a problem and when we start we rarely finish. (and it seems like it was never worth really starting because we are just both frustrated). I'm going to talk with my OBgyn later next month about it. I have an IUD without any hormone just a copper IUD but I think we are going to talk about a tubal ligation. I don't know what herbal med will do, I do know there was some research done for ladies with viagra off label use to see if it helped them achieve more pleasure but I don't think it does anything for libido. I'm sorry you are going through this...you are not alone.
"Courage dosen't always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying: I will try again tomorrow." |
| KYgurlsrbest |
Posted - Aug 06 2007 : 07:09:34 AM
I have considered it--that was what I discussed with my ob last year, but she was uneasy taking me off because of endometriosis. I had surgery a few years back, and haven't had any problems since, but honestly, I've been on bc pills since I was 15. I was a ballerina, and didn't have enough body fat to support a cycle, so the doctor put me on bc pills at that time. With the exception of a year when I turned 26, I've been on then continuously. I'm actually unsure as to WHAT or WHEN my cycle would be. Tasha, I know you're screaming right now  ...
I guess I'm going to have to start weighing the pros and cons--it sounds like being without bc might be the best for me, and dh was supportive when I mentioned it a few weeks back.
"She was built like a watch, a study in balance ... with a neck and head so refined, like a drawing by DaVinci"...
NY Newsday sportswriter Bill Nack describing filly, Ruffian. |
| GaiasRose |
Posted - Aug 06 2007 : 06:52:41 AM
Have you considered going off of birth controll and learning to know your cycle? that helps a lot of women I have heard. It also build more emotional intimacy with your partner because he learns when to expect when you will bleed.
I was on birth control ONCE for only three months becuase I hated how it made me feel, my body, brain and libido and that was nearly 10 years ago. I haven't looked back since. Both Rob and I are soooooo in tune with my cycle-well, when not pregnant, but pregnancy was even timed. I have found it also to be 100% fool proof.
~*~Brightest Blessings~*~
Tasha-Rose
Blogs: http://gaiarose.wordpress.com
http://womonandsprout.wordpress.com
Homepage:
http://ForestFaeries.etsy.com
Birth is safe, interference is risky; TRUST BIRTH |
| mikesgirl |
Posted - Aug 06 2007 : 06:50:05 AM
Asian Ginseng is supposed to boost energy as well as the libido. |
|
|
